I made it to all of the first tier companies and now if I don't hear anything before the weekend I will visit the second tier next week. I finally made it home just to find Sam sitting on my steps. I sighed knowing this was going to most likely be a difficult conversation. I parked and headed toward my porch when Sam jumped up, tears streaming down her face and she ran towards me incoherently speaking and crying with her arms outstretched like a child running to their mother after skinning their knee. As mad at I was at her, I was all she had and the most stable and consistent relationship in her life. I understood why she would be afraid to lose me, which is why I couldn't stay mad at her. Running towards me she suddenly stopped only a couple feet away with apprehension in her eyes and raised pinched brows as if to ask permission to hug me. I reached out to her and pulled her into a hug just for her to go limp in my arms forcing us to topple over to the ground.
"Ouch Sam, so you cause me to lose my chance at my dream job and now you make me fall on the ground" I laughed as I said it so she knew I was joking. We both sat up but stayed on our butts on the ground.
"Oh God, he wont hire you because of me? I thought I just caused a bad impression but this? Oh Lilly I don't know how you could ever forgive me after last night" Sam had tears streaming down her face at the realization of the extent of the damage she had caused.
"No Sam listen, I was upset, mainly at all the wasted time, I mean if I knew I didn't have a chance then maybe I would have relaxed just a bit and maybe even devoted a little time to a relationship. Look, after meeting Mr. Sinclair I realize that I wouldn't want to work for him anyways, hes a complete *ss and he is just the COO, I bet his brother is even worse. I went on to tell her about what he said at Club C and then today at the Bistro.
"Lilly I have something else I need to tell you, its about Mike" Sam's eyes started to well up and her words got caught in her throat.
"Sam, how about we go inside and I'll put on a pot of coffee first" I smiled at her not giving away that I knew full well what she had to tell me.
We sat down with our coffee and I just listened as Sam told me about Mikes proclamation and how he had been in love with her for years, she went on to tell me how she didn't know how to feel and that he just isn't anything like the men she normally dated.
"Sam I completely understand having a certain mindset in regards to what you want or what think you deserve, and then someone throwing a curve ball at you that forces you to change your direction and expectations," Sam looked at me apologetically before I continued" Listen Sam, you grew up with a very abusive man and in a way that has a tendency to warp the a persons reality of what they believe they deserve. I've watched you for many years always choosing the worst kinds of men to relive your trauma over and over again."
"That's not true Lilly, I've been with some really nice men, look at Tommy." Sam's voice started to sound defensive and slightly annoyed.
"Sam you have been with some gentle men like Tommy but he isn't nice, he cheats on you constantly" Sam's brows furrowed and her eyes darted back and forth trying to come up with her next defense before deflating with the look of defeat. I gave her a moment to think before I continued.
"I've watched you over the years get with men that were violent and abusive or sweet sounding men who would never hurt you physically but cheat on you the second you turned your back even though you would never cheat on them. I know, that you know you deserve more but you're also picking these men for a reason and I believe its because subconsciously you really think you don't deserve more then the way your dad treated both you and your mom. Sam you do deserve better, and even though its a little awkward with Mike being friends for so long, I for one think you owe it to yourself to date a nice guy for once and Mike is the perfect nice guy, he's interesting and s*xy and he's funny. Sam every time you guys are together you laugh more and smile more then ever. Give him a chance and you might just be surprised." I could see I was breaking through a wall so just to be 100% sure I got through I delivered my final blow.
"It doesn't have to be Mike if you don't think he is right for you although I do think he is perfect for you, but at least someone nice like him. Its either break the cycle or end up like your mother." That did it, Sam's eyes widened at that remark and she shook her head as if a shiver went down her spine and she suddenly looked at the coffee with disgust forcing me to question: Is it too strong?
"Its not strong enough… got any Baileys?" Sam said with a smile and her nose scrunched up. Which made me laugh and as I got up I responded with a quid pro quo: How about I get the Baileys and you call Mike to put him out of his misery and tell him you will go on at least one date with him.
Sam called Mike and told him she would go out on a date with him, he instantly asked to meet her tonight but she had been crying so much her face was puffy so she told him it was girls night and that she was free tomorrow. We hung out like we hadn't in a long time and ended up falling asleep on the couch.