"Shall we have our goodbye sex?" I was so zoned out that this question ripped me back just like that, not the word sex obviously. I turned toward Ralph, who was calmly waiting for my answer. I wouldn't dare to reject the offer, but the word goodbye started haunting me.
Is this the day when we are going to end everything between us? What was there to stop apart from fucking right? When I received the damn call, I knew the day was not going to end well and getting as expected. "What do you mean?" Ralph in return chuckled. "If I am planning to give a chance to him, then I should stop everything, right? I can't fuck and be with someone else, right? I am not like that, and it doesn't end well either."
If that was the bloody case, why he played with me behind my back then when we were fucking together? The question was at the tip of my tongue, but I am not getting why I am seeking an answer when everything was over between us ages before. Is it relevant? Yes and no. Yes, because he betrayed me, and no, because I don't know what I am going to do after hearing his answer. He has made his bloody decision, and again, I am in the same position, nodding my head in approval of his decision.
"Can't you take time and decide?" Ralph slowly got up from the couch by placing the empty bottle on the table; he was on top of me kissing. After a few seconds of hard-core kissing, he spoke. "I should, and I don't think my decision is going to change." "Why fucking betrayer? Has every fucking other guy died on this planet?" By laughing. "No, not at all, but no one can beat him when it comes to me. He will do everything just for me, apart from cheating but every other damn thing."
This answer whipped me strongly. I wanted to argue he will because he fucking got every goddamn thing unlike others or me. Before I could think further, the kiss distracted me. The word goodbye made me desperate, and I couldn't help but lash out by reciprocating and ravishing and biting his lips.
By enjoying the iron content in our mouths, I carried Ralph to the bedroom. I stopped his advances. I wanted this night to be as memorable as possible. I don't know what the future will be, and I don't know whether we are going to cross paths ever again. This night is all I have, and I need to make the most of it.
The word goodbye increased my carvings for him even more; everything turned intense. Every move turned hard-core, and the word goodbye made me neglect his pleas and concentrate on thrusting and ravishing him for the night. Every move made him vulnerable, making him out of breath gave me a strange satisfaction, and thrusting him without getting prepared turned me into a monster.
I dominated him thoroughly.
I don't know how many times we had our orgasms, but at some point, he was blackout. I was sadist because I was satisfied with the result.
We were drained thoroughly, and I couldn't move a muscle anymore.
Bloody goodbyes.
I closed my eyes and exhaustion took over me. When I opened my eyes, the sun was shining brightly, and Ralph was still beside me in the same position. Most of the morning I enjoyed this, seeing him when I woke up but today anger started surging in me. One last look toward him, and I was gone from the place, hoping this time forever.
When I woke up, the bed was empty, as expected; he had just vanished. Some things never change, including me and mistake that I am going to commit.
I wanted to be positive by thinking that everything would be ok this time, but I am damn human, and I can't help but distress. I am dreading my next step and fearing for my future. I want things to work this time, and I pray for it; hopefully, and finally, there will be a happy ending in my life too.
I made my way to the bathroom, and as the hot water hit my body, it ached all over. I liked every ounce of it, as I didn't expect anything different either. Sex was brutal and, at the same time, I wanted more and more. Hickey is his way of saying how he was frustrated with everything and about my decision, but he wouldn't open his mouth or stand for anything. Strange. Maybe pointing out you are wrong is better than risking anything once again strange.
I was in front of the mirror, covering the hickeys. After covering up everything, I was staring at myself and questioning. 'It will work out this time, right? I can work out; hopefully, Asher will try to work out with me too. Everything would be ok—no more teen dramas or adult ones. He has learned his lesson, and we have overcome every obstacle. Things will be okay this time; yes, it will be. I nodded my head in determination for both of us. I should be stronger than ever for both of us. Asher and I will work it out this time.
I headed toward my Parents' place as they were missing me, and I knew by default what could be expected, which I care less about. It's time to face and accept things that I have been running from and avoiding too.
As I entered, my mom ran toward me and hugged me tightly. Till today I curse for being a single child. She took her own time releasing me, and my dad took his turn. A chuckle escaped from Asher, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "I want to be the next person to do the same gesture, of course, in time, no hurry." "Of course, you both need to take quality time before deciding anything." My mom. "We discussed, dear; we are not interfering. It's our son's life, so let him decide whatever may be his decision; we are supporting him." "Of course, of course. I will support Ralph irrespective of whatever decision he is going to take, and I will make sure this will be his last and final chance too. I mean every word of mine, Asher."
The atmosphere changed after her low outburst. She never raised her voice, but one can pick her rage. Asher was not able to meet anyone's face, trying his best to maintain his composure while at the same time miserably failing. He cleared his throat a few times; I guess he was composing before opening his mouth. "Yes, Mrs. Roland." Which came in a low voice. He was always confident, irrespective of what he did, and today my mom shattered his confidence just like that. Suddenly my mom clapped a few times to distract everyone from the awkward atmosphere. "That's good; everything is settled. Let's start with the dinner. It's getting late, and I bet you guys are starving." She dragged everyone toward the dining area.
The dinner wasn't awkward; rather, it was pleasant. Asher and I were civilly politely responding to each other. We stuck to the professional talks; my dad was inputting a few things whenever required. For some reason, I wanted to snap at him so badly, but he didn't give me any reason. Everything went well so far.
After bidding goodbye to my parents, we both made our way to our respective cars. When I approached mine, he was standing beside me, followed by silence. I leaned on the car, seeing everything, but not facing him. I didn't know why, and to my astonishment, he was doing the same. There was a long silence, we both did not take the initiative to disturb the same. Asher was wearing a dark blue blazer with a matching white shirt, which gave a unique look to his physique and to his face. As always, looking way handsome.
"I hope I can call you anytime without prior notice or something. I don't mind, trust me, but it's time-consuming, and these days I am too busy, so a few times things might slip off my mind, you know." Star-struck, the word suits me very well, I bet. In his fans list, I will be in the number one position and may always be. His confidence is something that always amazes me and leaves me in shock. Today the tone didn't reach his usual level and was too varied. "Maybe." I could only muster up to say that much. I am afraid of how things are going. I want to take my time to give in, but I know very well the way everything is going it will be anytime soon.
"Either yes or no, Ralph, and I will be ok with your answer." I sighed. Everything that's going on these days is draining my energy to the maximum level. I didn't know what to say, so I kept quiet. Asher noticed my hesitation and spoke once again. "Let's not rush into things and will take our sweet time. It's ok, right?" I nodded my head in acknowledgment, and in return, he gave me a broad smile. "Drive safely, ok, take care." "You too." By saying that I was in the car and he made his way towards his.
I started the engine.
The climate was a bit chill; the cold air was hitting my face, making my every nerve relax. The sky looked amazing with lots of stars in it; carefully, I was stealing a glance now and then. I don't know why, but throughout my ride, I was glancing at the sky till I reached my home. After reaching, I turned off the engine; my hands were still on the steering, and my mind was clouded. Once again, my eyes were on the sky decorated with stars, making me think of Asher.
Asher is a shining star. He was born to shine, no doubt about that, and he has been absolutely doing that from a young age to now.
I wish I could leave the star where it belongs and enjoy its beauty from afar rather than entangle with it.