When I woke up, I felt Ye Xi kissing me. I opened my eyes, unable to see anything but the entanglement of lips and tongues, the touch of our noses, allowing me to smell his scent. I pulled him closer with one arm, and he pressed against me, gently moving his body. Beads of sweat trickled from his chest to mine, forming a line between our smooth skin, making the damp spring morning sweet and sticky.
"You're so hard," Ye Xi muttered, biting his lip, his hand tightly gripping mine.
"So are you," I replied, gripping his hand in return. "Did you sleep well? You woke up so early, the alarm hasn't even gone off yet."
"I was awakened by it. I feel it's hungry again," he said, his tongue in my mouth as he murmured.
"Being eighteen is great," I teased, playing with his tongue, my fingers wandering over the firmness between his thighs, pressing against him. From the heated base to the soft, moist tip, I heard his breathing quicken. His left hand moved away from my lower body and instantly covered my right hand. He held my right hand, guiding me to follow his rhythm. I increased the pace, and he gradually released his hand, softly moaning. I knew it was his way of expressing love for me. I gently kissed him, and his lightly panting lips pecked at mine, his murmurs alternating between muffled and clear. After taking a deep breath, his moans uttered my name, and I felt the trembling of his body like a bird. I stopped, carefully feeling the beat of Ye Xi's other heart. Along with this heartbeat, warm liquid flowed, as if Ye Xi was revealing his deepest love for me.
I waited for Ye Xi to hide this concealed heart again. As it shrank, he curled up, and I gently patted his back. His breathing gradually calmed down, and as he relaxed his body, he wrapped his arms around me. His sweaty body lightly touched mine, and my heart began to beat wildly, unable to resist the urge to merge with him. I got up and pressed against him, one hand gripping his neck, the other supporting him, slowly entering his body.
"Xi xi, you've ignited me again," he said nothing, his body trembling slightly, and I heard his breaths underneath me.
I widened my eyes, the room still pitch black, with only the sounds of our breathing filling the air. With each movement, I could feel his every breath, knowing every expression of his happiness. I wanted to intensify his joy, make it more intense and overwhelming. I quickened the pace, capturing his joy in his breaths, knowing he was close. Excitement rose within me along with his joy, I closed my eyes, embracing his waist. In his final uninhibited breath, I couldn't control a low moan. The breaths weakened, our tense bodies gradually relaxed, two soft shells drifting in the tide of love, swaying like two water plants in the waves of love river.
"You've drained me dry," Ye Xi chuckled.
"Not even a drop left?" I chuckled too.
"Nope."
"The raindrops at night can still fall, right?" I joked. "You promised to play for me."
"You're annoying, don't bring music into this," he said angrily, pushing my hand away.
"I was just kidding, don't take it seriously," I said, hugging him again.
"You saying that will make me think about it when I play," he said hesitantly.
"Really? Do you think about me in Tokyo?" It was a question, but also a plea.
He fell silent, nodded after a while, and rested his chin gently on my forearm.
"Do you know how happy I am? When you play and think of me, I become a part of your work, and you become a part of mine. All our future works will be our joint creations," I said excitedly.
"Maybe," he was reluctant to admit. "Indeed, it does enhance the playing experience."
The alarm suddenly went off. Ye Xi slipped away from my embrace to turn it off and began checking his missed messages. At that moment, I really didn't understand his hot and cold behavior. At other times, like any ordinary person, we would never know his inner workings in the world of music, just as I would never know how he felt about me outside of sex. So in our initial encounters, I kept trying to pull him into sex because only in sex could I feel his complete love. Only through constant sex could I confirm that he loved me.
"I need to get up. I have to practice the piano more today. I've been on the road for the past few days and haven't had time," he said defensively.
"Can I come to your concert tonight?" I asked cautiously.
"Sure, it's already arranged in Tokyo. I keep my word," he said, putting on his shirt with his back to me. "Did you get the tickets?"
"Dai Yanzhi gave them to me in Tokyo."
"Oh, it starts at 8:00 tonight. The concert hall is close to the hotel, so you can leave later," Yexi said, already dressed. I sensed an underlying meaning in his words, recalling being recognized by a stranger in the hotel lobby yesterday.
"Okay, I have meetings during the day because the initial promotion had good results, so the company decided to invest further in promotion."
"That's great, congratulations," I couldn't detect joy in his congratulatory words.
The intense flame of passion from just a moment ago was now extinguished by this cold conversation, plunging into absolute zero silence. I didn't ask him any more questions. I lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling, listening to the faint sounds of him tidying up, followed by a loud bang, as if he had closed the door to his heart.
Glancing at my phone, it was 7:40 in the morning. Taipei was 6:40 in the morning. The meeting today was scheduled for 9:00 in the morning Taipei time. I pondered how to fill these two hours, feeling extremely disheartened. I lay there motionless until my phone rang.
"Hey, you've been having a blast in Japan, haven't you? We haven't heard from you these past few days. At least give us a call, show some concern for your earnings," it was Arlong (Drangon Brother).
"Oh, I know the album is selling well. I've already heard."
"You really don't care about money, you have the attitude of a Puritan."
"No, it's just that I've been pretty tired these past few days."
"Oh? Busy partying?" Arlong teased.
"No, I've been hiking in the mountains, quite exhausting."
"Then who told you the album is selling well? Did you get recognized on the street or something?"
"...Yeah."
"Then you better be careful. Try to stay in places with fewer people, stay in the hotel if you can. Don't go to nightclubs or places like that, watch out for the paparazzi."
"Alright. That's it for now, I need to find something to eat. We'll talk later."
"Sure, talk to you later."
I hung up the phone, feeling even more agitated than before. Thinking about what Arlong said about income, I picked up my phone and checked the alerts from the bank, the countless numbers glaring in the darkness. I rubbed my eyes and counted the digits one by one. After reading the messages, I put down my phone, suddenly stood up, pulled open the curtains, and looked around. I saw the ring I had given to Yexi on the bedside table. Why wasn't he wearing it? I remembered his previous interview, where the host questioned him about the ring's origin and his emotional state. I guessed he didn't want to flaunt the ring anymore. Recently, I noticed him occasionally putting the ring in his personal bag, probably afraid of being seen wearing it on his finger in public again. Now that I had more money, this ring didn't really matter. There must be better things to make him think of me all the time. I had to make sure he wore my love constantly. How I wished I could give him the love right now. I opened my computer, repeatedly looking at the clock on the screen, eager to finish the meeting quickly.
The phone rang again.
"Hello, what is it?" I subjectively assumed it must be Arlong (Dragon brother) calling again.
"When will you have time to return to the United States?" It was my mom calling.
"I'll be back in Taipei in a couple of days and will stay there for a few months. After that, I'll return to the United States." In fact, there wasn't much work left for subsequent promotion and announcements. I just didn't want to go back to the United States, so I didn't want to tell my mom exactly how long I would stay.
"You're such a busy person now. Lijuan told me your album is selling well. Don't spend money recklessly," she lectured me as usual.
"I know."
"Don't be impatient. Saving money is a virtue. Give me an account of your expenses so I can plan how to reciprocate."
"I understand."
"When you go back to the United States, don't forget to visit Mr. Bai and his family at the White Manor. Miss Bai has been busy with your matters, contacting Mr. Song and your agent. Also, your next business plans are a concern for Mr. Bai too."
"I know."
"Also, when you return to the United States for two days, our families are planning a vacation in Greece. We've set aside the money for this. It's also considered a little repayment for them."
"I know." I didn't really listen to what she was saying, just repeating the three words, wanting her to finish quickly.
"You're being ridiculous, just saying 'I know.' I thought I was talking to a robot."
"Oh, you mentioned going to Greece. What month?" It suddenly occurred to me that Ye Xi's U.S. tour was in August. If we were going to Greece, we might miss his tour. I promised to take him to a cocktail party in New York, and I didn't want to break that promise.
"It's in August. I've already checked with Arlong (Dragon Brother) and Lijuan. You can free up half a month in August, but you'll have to work continuously the rest of the time."
"Oh, I have other plans," I thought reluctantly.
"How old are you? You still don't understand. The Bai family finally agreed to this trip. It's settled. I'll book the tickets right away. I have to take Kai swimming. I'll talk to you later." She hung up before I could say anything.
She always did this, arranging my time without my consent. Resentment and sadness welled up inside me. I had to make it up to Ye Xi somehow, hoping he wouldn't think I was unreliable. There was another knock at the door. It never ends, does it? It must be the cleaning staff. I impatiently opened the door, forgetting to check through the peephole if the visitor was friendly.
"Hello, this is room service booked by Mr. Ye Xi," a waiter stood at the door, pushing a cart. "Would you like to dine now, sir?"
With a smile, I nodded. He does love me, doesn't he? Even if he doesn't say it, I know, I know it all. So what if he doesn't say he loves me? As long as I can see him shining on stage, it's happiness. Moreover, he can be in my arms, and I can enter his world unknown to others. How lucky I am. I held the door as the waiter wheeled in the cart, setting the tablecloth and filling it with exquisite dishes. Sitting by the window, watching the hurried passersby in Osaka Umeda, a river flowed between the high-rise buildings of the metropolis. In the distance, the Yodo River shimmered with ripples, a good symbol of eternal love. Having the privilege of leisure with my lover's breakfast, I could indulge in relaxation behind closed doors. Other people's busyness had nothing to do with me; I had nothing else to ask for. It was just a pity that there was still a meeting to attend. However, thinking about the money in the bank account, I could enjoy the meeting. With money, I could give Ye Xi the best gifts in the world. With money, we could live anonymously. Sufficient wealth could give us the power of solitude, and solitude was the premise of freedom. By then, we would be free. He and I wouldn't have to worry about being ostracized by society anymore. We could go to countries where no one would point fingers at us, just like in Ginza 2-chome. I think Ye Xi would agree, as long as I had enough money.
My mind wandered during the meeting. In truth, as long as I could make music, I would be willing. Having money would make it even better. Someday, when I've earned enough money, I'll take everything I have and go with Ye Xi. In another ten years, when I've lost my popularity, and everyone has forgotten about me, I'll go with him to Majorca. He can perform in Europe, and I'll wait for him on the island. But for now, the company is preparing to promote me alongside the diva. I wonder how Ye Xi will feel about that. After his performance tonight, I'll make sure to clear things up with him in advance and give him the gifts I've prepared for him.
As soon as the meeting ended, I put on my cap, sunglasses, and mask and headed straight to Cartier. A "love" bracelet, a Santos de Cartier necklace—this way, he could hang the ring I gave him on the necklace. And there's that record. When I was in Tokyo, I promised to give it to him. I frantically searched through the record store, lifting up each record, ignoring the stares of others.
"Hello, may I ask which record you're looking for? Can I help you?" The record store owner approached me and asked softly.
"Air's album, 'Cherry Blossom Girl.'"
"Ah, they're very famous. Two years ago, when 'Lost in Translation' was released, this song was very popular in Japan. We have Air's vinyl records, and we also happen to have a collector's edition of 'Lost in Translation' vinyl. Which one do you need?"
"The collector's edition of 'Lost in Translation,' please." I hurriedly checked out, not wanting to linger in crowded places.
For the rest of the time until the concert started in the evening, I stayed in my hotel room, silently staring at the red paper bag from Cartier. This should be enough; he'll surely understand. I tore off a piece of hotel stationery and wrote a pledge, "You are my everything: my love, my tears, my desire. As long as you want me, I will come to you."