October
penelope
I can't actually remember the last time I unpacked all of my things from moving. It happens so often now, I learned to only open what I need. In this case, I don't think I'll be moving for some time now.
Aunt Sarah is taking me in, thanks to dad. He says it'll be good for me. Settling and finding a University in Oregon. That is, after graduating. But, with so little months left and no idea who I want to be, I can't imagine I'll be out of my aunt's hair anytime soon. Not that she minds though.
She's been so excited for me to come here, it feels like there's a catch. Or like maybe she has something planned. Either way, I just need the rest of the school year to go smoothly. It's not like I've had a bad reputation or anything. I actually just moved here a week ago.
The holiday break is over though. It has been for a week. Coming into a high school, after everyone has already started, isn't exactly ideal.
It's not dad's fault. I try to remind myself that since mom passed, he can't do it all alone. I could stay home by myself but neither of us want that. And his job is simply just too consuming, being a traveling lawyer and all.
He figured that since my uncle Leslie doesn't have kids, he and his wife might really love to have me. My aunt Sarah that is. He really wasn't lying either. Since I've gotten here, she's made me, approximately, twelve smoothies. Most of them being berry. My favorite. How does she know that? Beats the hell out of me.
Aunt Sarah tells me that Ashland High has a great education system. Good people and a nice town. So far, I'm putting that to the test. We'll see when I start school tomorrow.
Me and my aunt, sit at the kitchen island as we each watch the kitchen tv, seeing on the news that a bad fire happened the previous night.
"How awful is that? They probably have nothing left. What a shame." she says, shaking her head as she cuts vegetables for dinner.
"Don't they have some kind of fire resource around here? There's a forest fire, at least, once a week here." I shrug, swaying in a swivel chair that sat at the island.
"Well, according to them, only we can prevent forest fires so.." my uncle says in a matter-of-fact way, smirking.
I laugh quietly, watching the tv, seeing them play the fire over, and over as they discuss it. Why? What's the point of showing something of that nature, repeatedly? Unless they have a solution to stop it.
"Penelope?" I snap out of it, hearing my aunt speak to me, "School. Are you excited?" she smiles, throwing her vegetables into the pan.
I half smile and shrug, "I guess so. I'm not quite sure what I'm supposed to be excited for though." I laugh softly, standing up to walk my cup to the sink.
She laughs, "Um, I don't know, how about new friends, fun school stuff," she looks at my uncle and then back at me before whispering, "Boys." she smiles, covering her face so my uncle doesn't see.
I roll my eyes, laughing out loud, "Absolutely not. High school is almost over Aunt Sarah. If I'm meeting anyone, it's not until college." I said, washing out my cup.
My aunt smiles, looking at me, "When I went to St. Benedict's, I met two of the sweetest friends. Of course we aren't so close now, but it was good when it was." she says, seemingly reminiscing on the memories.
"So? Who was it?" I said, waiting for the punchline.
She stirred the food, "Oh. Clara and Rochelle." she set the giant fork down and picked up a hand down, beginning to clean off the mess from her hands. "You know, if I'm not mistaken, Rochelle has a daughter who should be around your age. Pretty sure she goes there too.Maybe you could find her?" she smiles again.
I scoff, "Not to be a prude, Aunt Sarah, but I think I'm good. Whatever happens, happens." I let a soft breath of air out, walking to the window before leaning on the wall.
"Besides. Nothing much can happen from now to May. I am not missing out on much." I giggle, sitting in the bay.
She laughs softly, "You really are your own worst enemy, huh?" she shakes her head as she watches me before reverting her attention back to the tv. I look out the window, watching the trees blowing. Aunt Sarah is probably right about me at least trying to make friends. I just really can't see that happening.
I'm usually never in one place long enough to make friends. I realize that's different now , considering I'll be going to college here also. Maybe ut couldn't hurt too bad to at least try and get to know someone.
Truth is, my dad and I aren't as close as I'd like to think. Even when he isn't traveling. He really only cares for his job and the people it entails. Hearing about my life is only a second factor to him. I miss my mom so much, for that reason.
She listened to me, even if she could care less about what the hell I was doing in life. I know that's one of the real reasons he sent me here. I know he wants me to bond with my aunt about our mom's dying. It's just not going to happen that way.
I'd rather keep it inside. My aunt means well, but I'm not quite sure she understands. My mother passed when I was seven. That makes it ten whole years. Before she passed, she left me tons of books. She used to write and eventually became an author.
Since then, I've done my own research on her, only to find out that she had lots of unfinished work. I'm unsure of what to make of it. I just know that I can make it into something one day.
My dad would say,
"I would make sure you use this to your advantage."
I guess I'm just tired of pretending to be something I'm not. It feels like this is where I need my mom most.
Later into the day, sometime before bed, I mustered up the courage to call my dad. Knowingly, I left a voicemail, trying to seem enthusiastic, seeing as though it went straight to vociemail.
"Hey dad.. I start school in the morning. Wanted to see if maybe you had any advice.." I smile to myself, beginning to soften my tone. "It's 9:34 right now. It's late, but you can call me. Anytime." I sigh. "I love you." I hang up my phone, gently setting it on my night stand as I turn over in bed to look out onto my balcony porch.
The moon shined bright through the door window, stars accompanying it in the background. I feel tears start to well up in my eyes, but I close them, tightly, holding them back.
It's just a matter of time until he calls.
~~~
The next morning, I found myself in the passengers seat of my aunt's car, staring into nothing as we drove. She got there so fast, I didn't even have a chance to get rid of my pre class jitters.
"Look, you can call me at any time. I will come get you." my aunt began to kiss my head. I felt like I was sitting with my mother again.
I smiled, hugging her. "I'll be fine, I swear." I pull away before opening the door, getting out. I wave to her as I run into the school.
The office took forever to get my schedule together but once they did, I was off. The first class was Economics. I walked in, waiting for everyone to overt their gaze to me. Instead, I was greeted with everyone still finding their seats as the teacher was on the phone.
I look around, finding a seat with my eyes. Seeing one, I make my way over, keeping to myself. I set my things down, turning around to sit. As I lower my body, the exposed skin my skirt revealed made contact with another lap.
I gasped, standing straight up quickly, turning around to find a young man, laughing as his friends egg him on. "You were almost there, you wanna finishing?" he taps his lap.
"You're sick!" I raise my voice, shaking in shock. He reaches to grab my thigh, but I slap his hand away before he can. I look around, searching for support from anyone.
Before I knew it, the teacher came over, gripping the guy up by his arm. "Campbell. You're out. I told you, you had one more time." he said, firmly, before pulling him up and escorting him out.
I looked down, grabbing my things before rushing to the back to the class, plopping into a seat. I closed my eyes, exhaling. Just as I did, I felt a tap on my shoulder.
I open my eyes, slightly startled, seeing it was the girl sitting beside me. "Hey, don't even sweat Chase. He's an asshole, everyone knows it. Don't take it personal. You're new and his dick is too small to compensate." she smiles while laughing.
I exhaled, relieved and smiled back. "Thanks." I turn into my seat, watching as the teacher calmed the class, trying to begin the lesson.
How odd? They just let guys act like this? I don't want to sound awful, but it's starting to feel accurate to a catholic school.
I look down at my binder and books, fiddling with the cover of my book, I happened to bring with me. I started to feel the gaze of the girl next to me.
"Do you read a lot?" she whispered, leaning over as she pointed to my book. I looked at her gesture, then her.
"Sort of. Not really. I just like some things." I nervously respond.
"It's cool. I'm into that." she smiled, reassuringly. "I'm Lily." she says.
I smile back, "Penelope."
With that, we both sent our eyes back to the teacher.
~~~
I pretty much spent the the whole morning thinking about how that random guy pretty much assaulted me. I mean he got in trouble. It just didn't feel like it was enough. That girl was really nice though.
It made me wonder if I should try and befriend her. If I see her again, it's definitely meant to be. If I think too hard, I'm making this way more complicated than it needs to be.
I made it to lunch and decided to find a cool spot, underneath a tree. My aunt made me a small lunch that I kept in a little box with a built in cooling pad. Something my dad bought me that was entirely too expensive.
I started to eat and people watch. Everyone seemed to have their own group. Not necessarily cliques, rather than just small groups of friends. It seemed nice. Weird for Oregon though.
As I ate, I noticed the violent boy, Chase, from earlier. I felt my blood begin to boil. If I could, I'd make him a dead man, for sure.
Staring him down, I watch his actions. He had finesse. Sex appeal without a doubt. It was almost like he knew that everyone's eyes were on him. That everyone was obsessed. And he was okay with it.
It was attractive. Intimidating even. Nonetheless, there was probably nothing deep down. No substance of a man. No personality, even if he tried.
His tan skin and dark brown locks of hair were just the right charm to make all the girls ogle over him. It probably is enough for me too. He is quite nice on the eyes, if I do say so myself.
A presence found itself beside me, jolting me out of my daydream. "Penelope, right?" a deep voice fills the air.
I look next to me to see dark brown eyes meet mine, followed by a charming and friendly smile. I stutter to get my words out, "Uh, that's me, yeah." I say.
He holds a sheet of paper out. I look at it to see it's my classes. I must've dropped it or something.
"Thanks, I guess I dropped it along the way." I smile, starting to feel shy.
"You left it on your desk in Earth Science. Not to be a creep, but I followed you a bit to hand it over." he started to chuckle at himself. This made me smile.
"Well, that's super helpful..." I started to linger my words, wondering his name.
"Beckett. Beck... whichever you prefer." he smiled, chewing on a piece of gum, softly as he ran a hand through his hair.
"Okay, Beck. Nice to meet you." I nod. I look up again, seeing Chase walk away talking to a girl. I feel my smile start to fade.
"Chase. Forreal?" I hear Beck laugh. I look at him, "I know he's an asshole-" I begin, but he cuts me off, "But he's so cute?" he nods, pursing his lips, shrugging, "Yeah, okay." he shakes his head.
I furrow my brows, "What? What's wrong with that?"
"He's a player Penelope." Beck raised one brow, "A girl like you? Is way too good for him. Seriously."
"A girl like me?" I say, smiling. "You don't even know me." I laugh.
"I know that you're out of his league?" he says, shrugging.
I look at him, feeling my cheeks heat up. I was speechless for the moment.
"What are you studying?" he looked down at my pile of work. I snapped back to reality, looking at my work.
I groaned, "It's stupid. Earth Science was the only class that I have like, weeks worth of catching up to do, and I have no idea where to even start."
"So let me help you? I'm an A plus student in the class. I could get you right in no time." he picked up my work, looking through it before setting down again.
I sighed, "Sure, but I'm not the best person to tutor." I say with an inflection.
"No matter." he says, grabbing my hand, writing a phone number is pen on my palm, "I'm patient." he looks at me, our eyes making contact again.
He stood up, dusting his pants off, "Think about it?" he shrugged.
"I'll see you later?" he suggested before walking away as I nodded, watching. I let my eyes fall back down to my hand.
That was extremely surreal. Like, fan-fiction surreal. I laugh to myself, shaking my head. I guess for most people, every day really is a movie. Maybe I can tell Aunt Sarah I met someone after all.
~~~
When school ended, I was conflicted on whether I should even tell my aunt what really happened during the day. Do I dare tell her about what Chase did to me?
I opted out and told her about Lily and Beck. "Yeah, Lily is fine." I say, looking out the window.
Aunt Sarah laughs, "Fine?" I nod, smiling, joking back. "Yeah. And then another kid, Beck."
She turned her head this time, "A boy?"
I laughed aloud this time, "Yeah, so what?" I say.
"Tell me more." she continued.
"Well he offered to tutor me is all. No big deal." I respond, nonchalantly. There, I began tuning out the world as my aunt began talking about her job.
The ride home was fast. I didn't hesitate to get my things together for a shower. In the midst of it all, I glanced at my hand to see Beck's number again. I couldn't help but think of our interaction at lunch.
I made my way to my cell phone, picking it up and putting in his number to send a message. With that, I began to undress myself.
It didn't take him long to respond.
Hey, it's Pen from lunch. :)
Hey you. Couldn't wait to text me huh?
Whatever. Thanks for offering to tutor me. Helps a lot. When should we start?
Come over tonight. 7? I can come get you
Okay, see you then :)
I set my phone down after sending the last message, smiling as I rush to the shower to get ready. Suddenly I can't help but think about what others might think at school. Are they the type to judge like that?
I remember I attended a school that would literally pull you aside for questioning if you started dating someone new. They would say stupid shit like, "So you guys doing the deed yet?" or "You should definitely send him nudes." Anything invasive that you could think of, really.
All these things play into why I like being private. If I disclose the fact that I'm a virgin or that I never have been in a long term relationship, how far would that get me in my social life? Not very far, I bet.
When I finished my shower, I got myself ready in something presentable, yet casual. I pulled my hair up and waited patiently for my ride.
Beck didn't take very long. This made me think that he may not live very far. My aunt Sarah had noticed all of my actions, enticing her to question me.
"So, where are you going?" she asked, smiling at my appearance.
"Just to.." I paused, thinking, "A friend's. The tutor kid. He's picking me up." I said, biting my lip.
"Just please be careful, okay? Sometimes people aren't what they seem, Penelope." she said, sounding concerned.
I nodded, "I know, Aunt Sarah. I'm not gonna do anything you wouldn't. Promise." I flashed a small smile, seeing Beck pull up into the driveway.
I quickly kiss my aunt on the cheek before trotting outside to the car, swiftly entering the passenger's side. I was greeted with a grinning Beck.
"Couldn't get enough of me, huh?" he said, smirking.
I rolled my eyes, gesturing towards the road. "Go, goofy." I let out a small laugh.
He's extremely charming and I can't help but to egg it on. Maybe this is good for me.