My soulmate is significant to me but, she isn't the only relevant person in my life.
Like many other people, I have a safe zone or, in this case, a safe person. This person is the beloved of my soul mate. It may sound strange but, when my soulmate is screaming, he always stays calm and collected. He's very entertaining, he makes me laugh a lot. Many people think that he isn't smart, but that's a lie when he says something incorrectly. It isn't because he doesn't know. He's watching if you fall or realize the "error"; I would say that he's a cunning person.
People have two sides, one that they show often and one that can sometimes be seen.
Just like my soulmate, her lover also has defects. He likes the drink of truth; I say so because it seems that his real thoughts come out when he drinks it; there're also his deceptions that many times made my soul mate suffer.
A problem that the two shares are. They always look too much for their families which, makes them fight, and that I'm a mediator. I hate choosing sides; at times like these, I feel that they care less because I shouldn't take sides, like if it was some kind of war.
Keep your feelings locked up isn't always ideal; at some point, they can explode.
When the beloved of my soulmate drinks, always or on most happenings, he ends up crying while expressing his deepest feelings and thoughts about everything and nothing like an unstoppable rain.
I must admit that on all those occasions I have cried with him, at that moment he promises many things; but the next morning arrived, he'll show another of his defects the lie since the next day it seems that he'll forget everything and his promises become void until he drinks again, makes promises and ignores them repeatedly, so on like a vicious circle that, despite having a beginning, has no end.
Does it hurt? Yes. I still love him? Yes, sure
It's ironic that although there're people who harm us, we still love them. Well, that's my case; I can't stop loving the beloved of my soul mate despite everything he has done and will surely do in the future.
I guess I could tell you a little anecdote so as not to bore you with my thoughts and feelings:
. I remember, a long time ago, my soulmate and beloved had an argument; it was the most enduring argument I have witnessed so far. Besides, both didn't speak.
They stayed that way, for three to four days until I decided to talk with both; first separately and later together so, they could express their opinions about the problem or rather problems because we started with one and then more followed. I don't think everything was fixed that day; at least some things could be solved, and; they spoke again. I must say that those days were very uncomfortable for me.
Why do I say that my feelings aren't relevant to him? I have many reasons.
As I said in this story not, only are they there. There are people like my twin; in a few words, she's the favorite of my soulmate's lover, no matter how many times he has denied it; his actions are worth a thousand words. If you believe that what you hear is jealousy, it may be. Although I hate the lack of concern due to my maturity, I'm also proud of my maturity because it helped me to understand many things and to be independent so most of my achievements are on my own. However, no matter how hard I effort I'm still compared to her. We're similar but only in appearance, in personality, we're two opposite poles; If she's the sun, I'm the moon.
I feel jealous but, I love her. She is one of the people who care about my feelings.
On the other hand, my twin is a very perceptible person. She's usually the center of attention and loves being around people; it is somewhat strange to see her alone. However, her high sensitivity makes her very vulnerable so. I entrusted myself with the commitment of protecting her, of course, only until she can do it herself.
Although she's by my side, sometimes her selfishness wins out over her, and she becomes my enemy, saying things that make me feel the insecure and inadequate person. There're days when I think she will replace me with someone more like her, someone more cheerful and lively. That scares me since I know that I'll have to accept it even if it hurts; I'll have to respect her decision but, if that happens, I'll still continue to take care of her as I have always done.
Love at first sight? Yes, I think it was that or maybe more than that. I really don't know.
Try to explain the feeling is confusing, very confusing, I believe.
The first time I saw her, I fell deeply in love. Maybe it was a new feeling that to now; I don't know what to call precisely. She was very delicate and tiny, even though I had been in similar situations before. I had never felt like this; maybe it was because she was mine, her closest bond was with me and, no one could take it away from us for the world. With it, some of my feelings arose and were amplified: protection, jealousy, insecurity, sadness, pride, happiness, responsibility, loyalty, brotherhood, resignation, and many changes that were difficult at first but later I got used to it; although I think that until now I continue to get used to some things and situations never experienced before.
Maybe you think the story is a bit messy, confusing, and meaningless but, that's because that's how feelings are and often thoughts. I also warned you at the beginning so, Do you want to continue reading this rare story? There're more things to discover...Do you want to know them and much more?