We walked the shrine gardens for a while making small talk, learning about each other, and I got lost in the conversations we had, forgetting that I was so privileged to walk alongside this man who just the night before had been revered on stage by thousands in an audience that worshiped his talent to sing like an angel and scream like a demon in one four minute span. He was so regular walking beside me, and through his eyes I looked at Kamakura in a new way. He grew up in the same place I did, saw the same sights I did, but he appreciated it in a way I took for granted. This world he showed me as we walked was different still than the one he drew me into when he was on stage, but this world I lived in, and I finally opened my eyes to it.
The afternoon left us behind and the sun tossed golden beams of light through the trees as it prepared to set. The crowds on the streets were thinning, but the air was still thick and warm. Streetlights here and there in darker corners were flickering to life, and shops were closing their shutters for the evening.
"I didn't realize it was getting so late." Aki said, coming to a stop to face me. "Thank you for showing me around today, I enjoyed getting to talk with you. I hope I didn't keep you from anything."
I thought about the study text book open on my desk in my room, but the thought was fleeting. "Not at all. I'm glad to have been able to meet you." I began to lower my head in a bow to signify that I would leave.
"Let's get something for dinner." He spoke quickly, as if he had been searching for an excuse not to say goodbye. "My treat, as a thank you for spending the day with me." I agreed without hesitation.
As the dark of night settled in, we sat in a corner of an izakaya. It was quiet, only a few tables were occupied, and the staff seemed in no hurry to turn them over with new customers. Aki laid his open hand atop the table toward me.
"Can I borrow your phone?"
I reached into my pocket without thinking, flipped it open, and placed it in his waiting hand. With an expression of concentration on his face, he pressed a few buttons, then handed it back across the table to me, making no comment about what had just occurred. He took his water glass in hand and took a sip, making an over dramatic attempt not to look at me.
"What did you do?" I looked at the screen to see my text messages open, a blank chat on the screen, and a number at the top.
"It's up to you now." He said in response to my confused glance. "If you want to give me your number, you can just send me a text. If you don't want to give it to me, then you can just delete it."
I typed a 'thank you', a smiley face, and signed it with 'Sugumori Natsuko', and pressed 'send' as fast as my fingers would go. Almost instantly, I heard the chime of a phone come from a pocket across the table. Without looking away from me, he smiled at the sound, not bothering to look at his phone. I recalled I had not heard the tone during the hours of the day we were together, though I couldn't recall if I would have paid it any attention. He could have had the volume turned off, I told myself, although he hadn't taken it out to look at it either. Even when I was sure the message was from me at his request, I had not laid eyes on the elusive phone at all. I was sure something in his expression had changed the moment we sat down in the izakaya, however, and I was sure he looked at me differently that he had during the day. Though we had only spent a few hours together, during that time we had each fabricated reasons to not leave each others presence, and I felt there was something more to our subconscious intentions that simply a resolution to spending the day alone instead. I tried to quiet my mind, telling myself I was analyzing the situation too much.
By the time we left the izakaya, the sky was near black. The streetlights and lanterns outside the shops were lit, and the streets were dark but had a feeling of safety, as if the road home was always going to be well lit. Aki stood in front of me, reaching for my hand to shake it firmly. Without letting go, he bowed deeply, almost parallel to the street.
"Sugumori-san, I can't thank you enough for showing me such a wonderful day." He said. "I would ask to walk you home, but we are essentially complete strangers, and I'm not sure if I could find my way back."
I waved my hand dismissively in front of my face. "No, of course not." I mimicked his bow to me back to him. "Hasegawa-san, thank you for having me along on your wonderful day. I enjoyed your company."
He laughed without holding back at my gesture, and I could tell he hadn't expected it, and he took it as a new glimpse into my personality. We parted ways, and I suddenly felt a little more empty without him beside me. Funny, I thought, I spent most of my time alone and yet a few hours walking and talking with a stranger had changed how I felt about being alone. As I walked, I looked at the streetlights, the shadows they cast on the sidewalk, the leaves of the tree branches overhead with green peeking through the darkness of the night. I saw it all differently. The Kamakura that I grew up in, that I felt mundane and uninteresting, at least for the night was a different world. One that was suddenly beautiful to me, and I had never thought to look at it that way.
As if on cue, my phone began to chime as soon as I opened the door to my apartment. I flicked on the kitchen light, setting my bag down on the table and absent-mindedly flipped it open. Hina's name was first on the list.
"Natsu-chan, how was the shrine?" It read. A second message followed. "Sorry to bother your studying."
I hit reply. "Sorry Hina-chan, I just got home. I ran into a friend at the shrine. See you tomorrow!" That should appease her curiosity until the morning.
The second message was titled with just a number. I hit the 'add to contacts' button. "Hasegawa Akira." I said out loud to myself as I typed his name. I read the message. "I hope you got home safely. I won't stop thinking about today for a long time. I hope to see you again very soon." It was signed 'Aki'.
I paused for a moment to imagine his face in my mind's eye, to picture him typing on the phone I had never seen, perhaps with a smile on his face while he did so. I pressed the reply button. "I hope you got to where you were going safely as well. I hope to see you again soon as well." I signed the message, 'Natsuko', as if to give him permission to address me by my first name if we in fact did meet again.
Catching me off guard, my phone screen lit up with a new message almost instantly. "We are working at our home studio for the next while to write new songs, so I will be staying in Kamakura. I would be delighted if you are able to meet me for coffee tomorrow afternoon."
I read the message over again, hardly believing the words. Surly, it was late and my eyes were playing tricks on me. Maybe I had fallen asleep at the table and was lucid dreaming. I replied, "I would really like to," and stared at the screen awaiting a new message. I almost expected nothing to happen, to be left standing in the kitchen staring at my phone until morning. I jumped slightly when the screen lit up in my hand.
"The same cafe we were in today, 4pm."
"I'll be there."
I closed the phone and placed it on the table, shaking my head at myself. Was the whole day just a dream? Would I sit down at my desk tonight and wake up in the morning to find I had fallen asleep studying? I would wait and see at 4pm.
I slumped down heavily into my desk in home room beside Hina, her face looking overjoyed to see me as always. I let my heavy shoulder bag slide to the floor and tossed the strap to drape it over the top. "Good morning Hina-chan." I beat her to a greeting, knowing she would barrage me with questions about why I hadn't answered her text yesterday and what other friend I could have possibly ran into.
"Natsu-chan, did you have a good day yesterday?" She turned in her chair to face me, bracing herself with her arms against the desk. She looked ready to pounce, eager to hear whatever news I had to tell her. I was afraid I was going to be disappointing.
"I went to the shrine like you suggested." I began, trying to decide how I would tell my story, and what I would leave out. "I was getting a coffee to bring with me so I could take my time enjoying the walk, and I ran into a friend from out of town. We talked a long time."
Hina nodded in approval, but I was unsure if she really believed me. "Okay. Walk home with me after school and get strawberry mochi. Then I'll let you study."
"I'm meeting my friend again after school." I said slowly, gauging Hina's reaction as I spoke each word.
She was surprised, but didn't seem insulted that I rejected her offer. "You mean you're not just studying these days? You have a social life too?" She was mocking me, and wasn't shy about doing it, pointing out that my greatest attribute was also my greatest flaw.
When the school day was done, I was quickly stuffed my oversized shoulder bag into my locker, pulling out a change of clothes. I was still unsure of what I was walking into. I was unsure of what Aki thought about me, or what motives he had for spending time with me. I was also unsure of what my own motives were, or how much I could hope for.
As I neared the cafe, I glanced down the intersecting side street, not looking for anything in particular, just daydreaming and taking in my surroundings. Parked on the side of the street at the end of a long line of cars, one caught my attention. It stood out in a place like that, low to the ground, a little wider than normal, and a chrome sort of blue colour. A large spoiler jutted out the back complimenting the smooth but blocky shape. Thin gold lines edged all the little details and outlined the shape, and the red of the tail lights in contrast to the blue was complimentary. A strange car for a place like this, I thought.
A group of girls stood in a circle in the street close to the cafe. They all wore the same school uniform, a different high school than mine, and though I could tell through their hairstyles and rolled up skirts that they were girls who pushed the limits of the rules, they all looked the same. I could hear their chatter as I approached, sounding angry and defensive. I slowed my walk, assuming I would be walking into a fight brewing, and surveyed my surroundings to discover another path into the cafe.
"Hey is that her? No way!"
I heard a shout from the group as I tried to make my way around them undetected. I suddenly felt as if a hundred eyes were on me, and glanced over my shoulder to see every girl in the group with eyes locked on me. I was hunted.
One girl emerged from the group, her arms folded across her chest. Her hair was done up in two small ponytails at the top of her head, and despite her hairstyle making her look younger, the heavy makeup she wore aged her. "If it isn't the girl who stole Aki all day yesterday. Who do you think you are?" I was far enough away from her that she had to take a step forward to address me.
"You must have me mistaken for someone else." I said to her, hoping she would believe me. I had a feeling a girl like her wouldn't back down, even if she knew she had the wrong person, the wrong person would still get the punishment. I could have really been anyone. My clothes were uninteresting, my hair was straight and black, there was nothing about me that stood out enough for someone I had never met to recognize me.
She took a few steps toward me in a slow saunter, and I was frozen in place battling with my mind. Stand my ground would show I had nothing to hide, but might exude more confidence than I was willing to own. Backing away would put me below her, giving away a weakness. "I was waiting for Aki all day, and I find out he was out with some girl he just met?" She dropped a hand heavily onto my shoulder, and I jumped in my skin from the impact. "And then I see the picture. Who are you?"
"I'm preparing for college entrance exams, I was in my room studying all day yesterday." I said, trying not to look away from her face as hard as she was trying to be threatening. "You have me mistaken for someone else." My heart was pounding in my ears, and I hoped my face hadn't already flushed with boiling blood. "Anyway, I don't know anyone named Aki."
I pushed past her trying to hide my shaking hands and knees, and headed into the cafe. I turned the corner as I stepped through the door to create as much space between myself and the window as I could. When I was sure she wouldn't be able to see me inside, I deflated. I put a hand over my chest as if it would calm my racing heart, then touched my cheeks to test the level of heat. I looked around for a sign that labeled the washroom.
"Natsuko-san!" I heard my name in a familiar voice and as my gaze swept over the cafe I caught a waving figure in the back corner. Aki smiled up at me from a booth out of the way of foot traffic. As I sat across from him, I could see the expression on his face change as he looked me over. "Are you okay?"
He looked just like he had the day before, just like he fit into the Kamakura I knew, as mundane as it was. His bleach-blond hair was clean and tidy, the long style he kept it in accenting the shape of his face. He had a straight-forward face, I thought, and that was why it was so captivating. His eyes came to perfectly symmetrical slants, his nose was the perfect size, his lips were full and framed his smile of nearly perfect teeth. It was all so natural on him, he just existed that way without trying.
"I'm fine, I think." I replied. I pointed to the door. "There's a group of girls out there in high school uniforms that I think almost jumped me. Somehow they knew I spent the day with you yesterday and were really angry about it."
A single shade of colour came out of his skin as he listened. "That's Sato Aya and her group. They're Guardian's groupies, and they come around every time we come home to Kamakura. My bandmates like them. I don't. But Sato-san will not rest until she makes me like her." He reached a hand across the table, leaning over to reach as far as he could. As he reached, I could see the skin of his wrist where his sleeve slid back, and a hint of black ink of a tattoo. I hesitantly reached my own hand back to him, unsure if it was the outcome he intended. He grasped my hand firmly, in a way that offered me comfort almost instantly. "Don't worry about them, they are really harmless. Just annoying. Sato-san would never do anything that would give me a reason to dislike her, and unfortunately she is smart about her moves."
"Isn't she a stalker, then?"
He smiled, shaking his head with a look of almost despair. "No, the rest of the band likes to have them around. They are only a nightmare for me."
His grasp on my hand was steadfast, intentional. "Do you not like her for some reason? She's not your type?" I was unsure how much information I could collect, even more unsure how to use the information.
"Well, her personality is awful." He said with a smirk. "But honestly, I'm not into that. Guardian is my job as much as it is my lifestyle, and I take it seriously. I'm not a rockstar to get girls, I'm a rockstar because I love music and performing it."
It was an honest answer, I knew from the tone of his voice and the hint of annoyance expressed at the stereotype. By the way he held himself, the way he moved through space, the ease of his expressions, he knew he was desired. By the way he hid his skin, dressed in plain clothes, neatly smoothed down his hair, he knew blending into a crowd was the best way to hide in plain sight from those who desired him. The first time I met him, I had seen him on stage just the night before, but had he not spoken to me on the street the next day, I knew I would not have recognized him. He counted on that.
He released my hand suddenly. "Let's go." He said, firmly, in a way that almost made me apprehensive of what would happen next. "But we might have to run."