August's POV-
When Emerald went upstairs Alpha Paul closed Helen's bedroom door and we both stood in the narrow hallway together.
"Something I need to be concerned about?" He asked me.
I thought about how I could explain the situation that happened at that party without the parts of me almost killing one of his young pack members.
"She had a fight with her boyfriend this morning and they broke up. Then Emerald got invited to some party and that boy tried to force himself on her when she was alone in the bathroom." I said trying to sum up the night without all the details.
Alpha Paul's face went hard and his jaw tightened up a bit.
"Did he.."
"No. I stopped it, but I'll be honest with you Paul I did not take it easy on him." I said and he nodded to me letting me know he understood.
"Anything else?"
"Yes, when they had that fight Emerald got... upset and he saw what she could do." I said not really knowing what to call Emerald's fire.
"I'll be sure to talk with him first thing in the morning and I'll be honest with you August. I will not take it easy on him." He said and I felt better knowing Keith wasn't going to get off with just a beating.
"Is there.. anything else you want to tell me?" He asked and crossed his arms over his chest.
His voice wasn't as serious anymore and neither were his eyes. I furrowed my brows at his change in mood and didn't know what he was referring to.
"No?"
"You're sure there's nothing else about Emerald that I need to know about as her Alpha?" He asked again shifting back to the serious tone.
My eyes went from his to the closed door he was standing behind. Aunt Helen must've talked to him about us. I looked back at Paul and matched his serious voice with my own.
"Nothing that I can confirm as facts." I said to him and I could tell he understood what I meant.
"Alright then.. well if that changes I want to be the first to know." He said and I nodded to him in agreement.
"August I think you two should stay by Helen's side tonight. She expressed to me earlier that she feels ready." He said to me while putting his hand on my shoulder.
My heart sank into my stomach hearing this. I didn't know if I was ready to say goodbye to her for good. I guess you're never really ready for that though. I should feel grateful that I get to actually say goodbye to her unlike how I got to with my parents.
"Thank you we will." I said to him and he shook my hand before walking back down the hallway and out of the house.
When I heard the front door shut I opened up Helen's door and made my way into her dimly lit room. She was still sleeping in bed and she no longer had the iv in or oxygen.Her breaths were shallow, but I could still hear her faint heartbeat.
I went into her bathroom where my duffel bag was still sitting on the floor. I quickly changed out of my wet shorts and put on some grey sweats and plain white shirt before walking back out and sitting in the recliner at her bedside.
I thought about how the last time I talked to her I had been upset and now I probably wouldn't get the chance to apologize. I grabbed her hand in mine to squeeze it. They were clammy and her pulse was very low.
"I'm sorry for being stubborn Amma. Thank you for keeping my Luna safe for me all these years." I said to her in a hushed voice.
Emerald's smoke scent hit my nose and I looked up to see her standing in the doorway and no longer had tear stains on her face. She had washed off all that makeup and her hair was extra frizzy from being in the pool. She had on a baggy gray graphic t shirt and blue plaid pajama pants that were too long for her.
How long has she been standing there?
She walked over to where I was and sat on the arm of the chair and just stayed looking down at Helen. She didn't say anything and I neither did I. I didn't want to tell her that this could be Helen's last night. Not after what happened. I couldn't just tell her something like that after tonight.
There was a large blanket bundled up on the floor near the foot of the recliner, so I grabbed it and pulled Emerald from the arm of the chair and into my lap. I covered us up and wrapped my arms around her and laid my head back against the recliner. She shifted to get comfortable and laid her head against my chest and balled her fists up against her own chest.
I pulled the blanket up over her shoulders and just held her against me and we stayed sitting in the silence next to Helen's sleeping body.
I didn't want to ruin this moment or bring more stress to Emerald, but she had a right to know.
I leaned my head down and kissed the top of her frizzy hair and squeezed her tighter after another minute.
"Emerald if there is anything you want to say to her then you should probably do it now." I said gently to her.
"She can't hear me." She said back in a raspy whisper.
I smoothed her hair down and laid my head down on hers.
"Sure she can." I whispered back.
She didn't say anything back, but eventually she started to wiggle free from me and stood up and let the blanket fall to the floor. She sat on the edge of the bed and held Helen's hand in hers.
"You are the only person who ever truly loved me and I took you for granite so many times. I never deserved you in the first place. I'm so sorry I wasn't a better daughter. I just.."
Her voice cracked and I knew she was trying to hold back her tears.
"I just don't how to love."
Her words were like salt in a fresh wound to me. Did she really feel that way about herself? How could she ever think that she didn't deserve to have someone care for her? Helen has been boasting about Emerald since she first brought her here and I could tell over the phone through the years how much she enjoyed being a mother and having a daughter of her own.
She leaned down and pecked a kiss to her cheek and I wished I could've grabbed her up to comfort her.
Her words just hit home for me and I knew how she felt. I didn't know how much I needed my parents or how much they really meant to me until they were gone and the regret for never sharing how much I appreciated them was like acid slowly eating away at my insides.
The shame I had for never coming to my parents defense had ate a hole in me. I had tried to fill it with thoughts and promises of revenge, but I can recall seeing those wolves on top of my father like a video in my head.
I just wasn't strong enough to save them.
Emerald placed both of Helen's hands across her chest and started to unbraid her long hair until it was all laying freely around her. She wiped the tears from her face and looked over at me.
I leaned off the back of the recliner and held both my hands out for her to take. She sniffled and slowly placed both her hands in mine, but instead of holding on to them she wrapped her fingers around my thumbs and pulled herself up from the edge of the bed.
My heart fluttered feeling her hands gripping my thumbs and I didn't ever want her to let go.
I brought her back into my lap and pulled the blanket back over us. She curled her fists back up to herself and laid her head on my chest and I wrapped my arms around her and snuggled my face into her frizzy hair again. I closed my eyes and took in her scent not caring if she knew it or not.
"August." I heard her whisper and I flicked my eyes back open.
"Hmmm?"
"What do I do now?" She asks me and I don't say anything back at first.
I assumed she was talking about after Helen's passing. I'm not sure if she thought she'd have to move out or if she was just genuinely lost about what her next move in life was suppose to be. I didn't know what her next move should be either, but I know I wanted her to stay put until the blue moon comes.
Helen is her only tie to this pack and once she's gone there won't be anything keeping her here. Emerald could easily decide to take off and leave to go her own way. She might want to look for her parents or just start fresh somewhere new again or maybe she would decide to stay here and be content living where it's familiar for her.
None of those things could happen though if she's my Luna. I wouldn't let her stay here and I wouldn't let her run away and go somewhere else. I would take her back home to my pack where she's supposed to be and she can start over there. She could see her old friends again and go to the Kyser's farm whenever she wanted.
We could go on our morning runs together and I will eventually get the hang of making her breakfast. I will even let her bring her death trap if she wants and she won't have to ever worry about having to hide her fire. Everyone there knows about her already and really it is her home.
I just have to wait for the right moment to tell her. A part of me was worried that she was not going to be happy about me being her mate. In fact I knew full well she wasn't going to be happy about it. She made it clear to me that she had no interest in ever finding her mate.
It hurt to think that she didn't want me. She didn't know it was me she was refusing as a mate, but hearing it out loud didn't help. Her words rang in my ears making my chest tighten up in discomfort.
"Always and nothing is going to change my mind or convince me otherwise."
I squeezed Emerald's small body closer to mine and and took in her scent again to get rid of the negative thoughts.
"Now you grieve and you hold on tight to the memories you two have together." I said to her finally.
She didn't say anything, but I could feel her nod her head a little to let me know she heard me. I closed my eyes again and after a few minutes Emerald snuggled in closer to me and the sound of her soft breathes filled in the silence in the room. When I figured she was deep enough in sleep I kissed the top of her head multiple times and tangled my hands in her hair and took in that ashy pine smell that I craved so badly.
'Mark her.' Zeb commanded making me stop my greedy hands and I wrapped them back around her body to try to not get intoxicated off her scent.
'It's not going to kill us to wait a little longer.' I said back to him.
'You could do it now though and save us the time.' He argued back and I chuckled lowly to myself.
The blue moon was only a few nights away and the closer it gets the harder it will be to hold back from her. It was already difficult from the way her scent affected me now and how content I felt with having her in my lap and in my arms.
I wasn't really sure how I was going to bring up the mate thing to her yet. I decided I would have to just worry about it tomorrow and try to enjoy holding my beautiful Luna.
My Luna.
I have waited so long to have her and the fact that she was someone I had already cared for made it all the more special to me. In a way I was getting the two people I had been thinking of for most of the past decade. I just had no idea they were the same person and thinking about it made me smile against her frizzy hair.
Everything about her was perfect for me just like I always knew my mate would be. Her wild
untamable hair and smoky scent mixed with those gorgeous mismatched eyes have always been on my mind ever since I met her and now it makes since as to why.
Now that I see her as my possible mate I can't see her as anything else. She's not the little girl I found in the woods and she's not the playful puppy who pushed me into a hole. She's not even this woman who's too stubborn to show any weakness and is always ready to jump on her motorcycle and take off.
No she's just mine.
Emerald is mine and has been for longer then either of us realized. I held her closer to me if it were even possible at this point and buried my face into her hair until I finally drifted off into sleep.