"Masarap ba?"
I was even frozen there at my seat staring at him while he's maneuvering the car when he asked that question. Napalunok naman ako sa tanong nya. Tinatanong nya ba kung masarap... siya?
Paano ko naman yon malalaman eh di ko pa naman sya natitikman?
Napailing naman ako sa naisip ko. Ansama eh. But I must really say that he really looks good in that white shirt na pinatungan ng dark blue cardigan he's wearing which highlighted his broad shoulders and his hair looks really posh, though hindi naka wax ang kanyang bagsak na buhok ay naayos ito in a manner where a a little portion of his forehead is exposed. He also look serious while driving, his lips pursed as he's too focused sa daan. Paminsan-minsan ay naka kagat nya iyong labi niya kapag babaling ang sasakyan, his eyes on the road.I was even confident na hindi sya lilingon sa akin habang nag da-drive siya but halos mamula na naman ako nang lumingon sya panandalian sa direksyon ko.
"Ha?" medyo maang ko pang tanong. I swear, if Nami saw me at this state, she would laugh at me. She would even say, 'Ghorl, antalino mo pero pag sa gwapo bigla ka talagang naba-blangko' with a matching error 404 sound imitation pa.
"Halabyu" he replied na kinakunot ng noo ko. I think he noticed my shift of emotion kaya medyo naubo pa ito nang mapansing medyo nabigla ako.
"No, I mean, the strawberry latte yesterday, masarap ba?" he asked seriously after the halabyu incident after nya akong lingunin ulit ng ilang sandali bago nag focus muli sa pag da-drive.
"Sakto lang?" unsure of my answer. He was about to talk about something nang pansin ko naman nasa tapat na kami ng SJA kung kaya naman ay aga-agad na akong bumaba sa kotse na iyon at nagtatakbo sa room which probably left him dumbfounded. I mean who wouldn't kung iyong kausap mo ay biglang nagtatakbo? But who could blame me? I was so flustered by that little interaction. How come na tinanong lang naman niya ako ng simpleng question pero ganto na ako mag-react. And why does it seemed like short questions from him ay mas nakakakaba pa sa mga tanong in our graded recitation.
I wasn't even bothered kahit na hindi ako nakapagpasalamat sa kanila. I know Raine would do it on behalf of me. Though medyo napaisip ako sa iisipin nila about me na walang tamang manners at hindi man lang nagpasalamat.
Nang makarating na ako sa room namin sa second floor ng Burgos building, I was even sweating a little and panting from all the running. Kaagad ko namang napansin na halos kalahati pa lang ng klase ang naroon, the other half was probably still at home, sleeping soundly as they already decided to drop this class.
"Hoy gaga, ba't ka hinihingal dyan? May ginawa ka siguro no?" I heard Kris asked me nang makaupo ako sa tabi nya. She's even wiggling her eyebrows, suspicious that I'm exhausted early in the morning.
"Mas gaga ka, akala ko kasi male-late na ako," I just told her para hindi na masyadong mag I reached for my bottle of water naman from my bag to hydrate myself a little and to ease my breathing somehow.
"Baka atakihin ka sa puso nyan beh," bulong pa nito kaya naman automatic kong dinama yung puso ko. Grabe, ang bilis ng tibok. Was it because of the running or was it because of him? Halos burahin ko naman agad sa isip ko ang pumasok na tanong na iyon as the answer was obvious.
" Hindi yan, keri ko toh" I assured her and put back my tumbler to my bag. I'm not that weak naman, asthma lang ang meron ako the same as Raine, not so serious like a heart disease.
"Sabi mo eh, nasan pala yung si Ulan? Mabiro nga at naunahan ko kayong dalawa mwahahaha" excited nyang pag hahanap kay Raine na kinalunok ko ng imaginary laway ko. Kinuha ko na lang tuloy iyong notebook ko for this class and read some parts na medyo naguguluhan ako.
"Halabyu" that word echoed in my mind.
I know where she is, Kris. She's downstairs with the Sais guy and that man. From the car I've run from because I'm fucking shy and acting like I have a crush on him.
"Hoy Joe! May naghahanap sa'yo dito!" I heard a classmate, perhaps Jena called me. Halos manlaki naman ang mata ko nang makita kong pumasok si Raine kasama si Jeanne sa back door ng room.
"Hoy Jeanne, bat parang straight kalalabas mo lang ng cr, yung kulot mong buhok tumutulo pa" pansin agad ni Kris sa dalawa. Raine was even smiling at me, probably teasing me about what happened earlier.
"At ikaw, himala ata at naunahan ko kayo ni Joe, anong meron?" Kris accusingly asked us. Probably the FOMO attack, she has this thing with overthinking.
Yet, everything, everyone went frantic for a moment when Jena yelled that Sir Adi was near our room. The slightly chaotic atmosphere immediately went peaceful at iyong kaninang gulo-gulong upuan and tables ay naayos. It's like magic and all, kabog ang transformation ng core section namin whenever we knew teachers are coming in.
But the real magic lies in front of my classmates' eyes especially mine when I saw Sir Adi walked in to the front door of our classroom with two guys. Halos nahulog pa ata sa sahig ang jaw ko, my heart booming like Nicki Minaj's song, Super Bass.
He even winked at me and smiled with those luscious lips which made my face beet red.
Fuck the what?
"Walanjo Joe, paano mo na survive yung kindat ni Kuya Uno na iyon?" Kris whispered, almost squeeling but surpressed it kasi nandyan na si Sir. Both of the guys are beside him naman, holding papers I don't know what for.
"Paturo naman mamsh pano makabingwit ng ganong boys" Roan in front of me teased. Hala, eh siya nga diyan ang maraming lalaki este manliligaw.
"Shhh, makinig na kayo kay Sir" I just told them para matigil na. Pilit na pilit kong pino-focus ang sarili ko sa sinasabi ni Sir Adi but my eyes would eventually drift to the guy beside him. Wala pa namang sinasabi si Sir about sa gagawin namin today but it looks like he wouldn't give us a lesson.
"Joe, wag naman masyadong matulala kay Kuya Uno" Jeanne whispered while leaning backwards, trying to see my reaction. I immediately knocked some sense at kinuha na lang ang pencil sa bag ko, as it was obvious we're gonna fill up some forms.
"Nako, pasensya na class at hindi ako makakapag-lesson this period, there's an urgent matter kasi regarding your defense in your subject Entrep and we need to have a meeting this time of the day since busy kaming lahat ng advisers nyo later. I would just leave these forms for you to rate the facilities of the school. Uno and Six would guide you and if ever you have questions, ask them. Is it okay for you?" Sir Adi said to all of us. Nagdiwang naman ang mga kaklase ko, probably because they won't be bored with Sir's lesson for today, early in the morning samantalang ako ay hinayang na hinayang na nag-advanced reading ako kagabi gayong wala naman palang klase. Though I could treat it as a stock knowledge, keber, mabilis akong makalimot ng mga bagay-bagay, most especially lessons from classes.
I was just brought back to reality when Sir bid his farewell to us at muli na namang nangkagulo ang room. Pero hindi ganong magulo gaya ng kanina, out of respect for the two men in front of us siguro who seemed to be whispering to each other. Nagsisimula na ring magkwentuhan ang mga nasa paligid ko and I just sighed, bothered by the noise. Inaantok pa ako ng konti.
"Jeanne, may notes ka for FABM2? Pahiram naman" Kris told Jeanne. Kaagad namang inabot ni Jeanne ang isang yellow cattleya to her at umayos na ng upo, probably trying to relax some nerves and her breathing. Sanay naman na ako sa ganong gawain niya kapag nakakarating sa school with her head dripping waters everywhere because she's always late. Imagine, a person who hates tardy people has a friend who's always late, ang contradicting diba? But she wasn't like that naman kapag gagala kami kasi kapag may pupuntahan kaming galawan ay siya pa ang nauna sa meet up place ng barkada. Her late card seems to be only working out for everyday classes.
"Guys, get one and pass na lang nitong paper. Sandali lang naman sasagutan and you could do whatever you want afterwards," Uno told the class na medyo kina tahimik naman ng marami. My girl classmates were even gawking at him except me and my friends, dahil siguro ay tapos na kaming hangaan siya at titigan kahapon sa cafe.
Pinamigay naman na nila ang papel at pinasa iyon ng mga kaklase ko, mga tahimik na at seryoso. Though some of them are still staring at him and most especially to Sais guy beside him, the guys were also looking at them in admiration but immediately cutted when Sais spoke.
"Kindly use ballpen na lang sa pagsagot. Wag sana pencil because there might be a possibility na mabura ang rates and suggestions nyo. It's for the school naman most especially how it would maintain the quality services here"
Napatingin naman tuloy ako sa hawak kong pencil. Binaba ko muna ito bago kinuha ang backpack kong nilagay sa isang tabi and looked for a pen. Halos sabunutan ko naman ang sarili ko nang hindi ko makapa ang g-tech ko sa mali it na bulsa and started rummaging my bag. I then looked around and saw all of them were starting to answer the rate form. Halos inalis ko na lahat ng laman ng bag ko but I still can't find my pen.
Only for it to hit me, shit. I forgot I left it sa study table ko kagabi. I was drawing something last night para magpaantok after a long reading practices and nakalimutan kong ibalik sa bag ko. I'm screwed, wala pa naman akong spare pens kasi mahal ang g-tech.
"Kris, may extra ballpen ka pa?" I asked her.
"Nako beh, wala nga eh. Napulot ko lang tong gamit kong ballpen kahapon hahaha" kwento pa nito sa akin. I just thanked her afterwards. Tinanong ko rin si Roan and Joe, also some of my classmates around me pero walang nagpapahiram. Hindi naman ako makatayo para makahiram kay Raine kasi it's too bothersome. I don't want unnecessary attention pa naman.
Napabuntong hininga na lang ako and started to think things while seating. Maybe I'll just wait for Kris to finish rating para ma hiram ang pen nya but the rating form is atleast 10 pages, back and forth dahil sa daming facilities ng school na ito.
Naalala ko naman iyong kasabihan nila na when you lost your pen you'll die like? Kapag wala ka daw ballpen, wala kang sagot sa quiz then mababa grades mo and di ka makakagraduate. Then if you haven't graduated, there would be no work for you which means no money, then no money means no food, no food means hunger and hunger would be the cause of your death. Though it's just some fallacy made by a human, I was still bothered not having my pen. Like how am I supposed to last in 8 periods of classes without a pen? I was even considering on using the pencil, bahala na si batman.
"Here" someone waved a pen in front of me, getting my attention back after my little monologue.
"Thanks," I said while smiling pagkakuha ng pen. Nilingon ko pa kung sino ang nag-abot noon na medyo kinapula ng pagmumukha ko.
"Hmmm... Don't smile like that. I'm not giving it to you. Ibabalik mo rin to sakin" dagdag pa nito at bumalik na sa pwesto sa harap na kinairap ko. He even leaned to the white board na malinis, posing like a model. Para naman kasing may photoshoot dito for a magazine cover dahil sa pormahan nila.
"Hindi ko namang sinabing aangkinin ko ah?" bulong ko pa sabay irap na kinahagikhik ni Kris sa tabi ko.
"Hahaha, naghahanap lang yon ng paraan para makita ka ulit" she hypotesized na kinalaki ng mata ko.
"Ghorl, tama na sa kape, sobra na yang imagination mo" natatawa ko pang sabi sabay yugyog sa kanya.
"Imagination mo ang limit babes. Ngayon may reason na tayo bat tayo pupunta sa Omelas mamaya para tumambay ah" pagdadahilan nya pa na narinig naman ni Jeanne.
"Ay bet ko yan babes, hahanap din ako ng ibang gwapings don" sabi pa nito at kinahalakhak nilang dalawa. Napailing na lang ako sa ginawa nila, trying to stifle a smile from forming in my lips and started to rate the facilities of the school.
Ako rin naman kasi eh, hindi ko maintindihan itong nararamdaman kong kilig? I can't differentiate if it's kilig or excitement. Am I kinikilig kasi someone as handsome as him noticed me or excited and a little thrilled that there is another person came into my life, someone I haven't met before at hindi ko kabisado.
"Joe, tapos ka na ba?" Joe asked me after 5 minutes or so. Napatango na lang ako, gesturing her that I'm done already after shading the circle for the last facility to be rated.
"Akin na papel mo besh, papasa ko na" she volunteered. Napansin ko namang medyo nagkakagulo sa harap, pulos mga babae ang nakapalibot sa dalawa, almost all of them asking questions about their personal life.
"So may girlfriend ka na Uno?" I heard Ella asked him na nagpapintig sa tenga ko. Tama ba iyong narinig ko? Did she just dropped honorifics and called him, just Uno? First name basis? Close kayo ati?
"Yeah, sorry girls. Taken na ako eh" he just told them which made my girl classmates make some sound like 'awwww'. Napairap naman ako sa reaksyon nila. Though I was a little disappointed na meron na syang jowa, I hid it with a smile when I noticed Kris looking at me.
"Potek, taken na sya. Musta hearteu mo besh?" she worriedly asked, balak pang ka pain ang dibdib ko. Luckily naman ay nailayo ko agad ang sarili ko sa kanya. I just chuckled after, trying to hide the awkwardness.
"Hala sya, ba't naman di ako magiging okay?" I fired back but she just shrugged her shoulders, can't tell her opinion towards the issue.
"Besh, papel mo" bulong pa ni Jeanne kung kaya't inabot ko na kasama nung ballpen na pinahiram ni Kuya Uno kanina.
"Oh, bakit naman sakin mo papasauli? I'm not the one who used it " sabi pa nito pero I still handed it to her.
"Sige na Jeanne, pakibalik na lang. Pasabi salamat shopee este salamat kamo" sabi ko pa na may konting biro to ease some awkwardness between me and Kris. Alam ko kasing nakamasid pa ito sa akin, checking if I'm affected with what I just heard.
With a little push, Jeanne really did gave him back the ballpoint. Napalingon pa nga ito sa banda namin kaya napadukdok na lang ako sa table, too shy.
"Oh, time na pala. Nandito na ba lahat ng rating form?" I heard Sais asked which all of my classmates except me na nakadukdok pa rin agreed.
"Sige, salamat sa time. We'll go na and you can do whatever you want. Just please avoid going outside at mag-ingay. Masyado pang maaga" bilin pa ni Kuya Uno. I waited for the door to click, indicating na lumabas na sila before lifting my head.
Yet my mouth went agape when I lifted my head. They were still there, Sais arranging the forms and Uno in front of our table, nakakumot ang noo habang naka tingin sakin.
"Wala kang magagamit na ballpen later. Just return it to the cafe" he just said seriously. Though kahit nag-ingay na ang mga kaklase namin at mga nasa sarili nilang mundo, I still heard it clearly.
"I have a pencil you know" I sarcastically replied, showing him my pencil.
"So? Ang sabi ko wala kang magagamit na ballpen. I haven't stated any pencil to my previous sentence, am I right?" he also replied with the same manner as mine na kinalunok ko ng imaginary laway ko.
"Also, I have a favor to make. It'll be a win-win situation, I promise" sabi pa nito at naglakad na palayo sa amin, pulling Sais out from our classroom.
"What did I just saw?" Raine exclaimed, tumitili pa ang gaga nang makalabas na ang dalawa.
"Sana all may progress sa pagjojowa woot woot" Jeanne also commented na kinakunot ko ng noo.
"Susko manahimik na nga kayo, mag rereview pa ako" trying to dismiss them, I replied.
"Also, I have a favor to make. It'll be a win-win situation, I promise" Kris even tried to mimick. I'm still trying to surpress my smile but failed to do so. Naaalala ko na naman kasi kung paano nya sinabi iyon and he looked so cool.
"Aruy, kinikilig si ateng. Sana all na lang" Jeanne remarked.
"Ano ba 'yan, taga sana all na lang ba role ko dito?" tawa pa nito which made us all chuckle.
"Gaga, taga-sana all lang din naman ako ah" sabi ko pa, remembering how many times I said those words kapag may nakakasalubong kaming sweet couples sa hallway ng school.
"Hay nako, ewan ko sa'yo, iba kasi karisma mo" Raine even told me, cupping my cheeks and squeezed it, pinanggigilan bago bumalik sa pwesto nya sa harapan.
"Karisma eh kung manapak nga iyan, wagas eh" kontra naman ni Jeanne sa sinabi ni Raine. Hahabulin ko pa sana ng sapik pero bigla na lang lumayo sakin kaya iyong table yung natamaan ko.
"Oy gaga, masakit yun. Tumunog yung table" Roan commented and went to grab my hand, checking it, worried I've hurt myself.
"Nako mamsh, keri lang to. Sanay naman na ako masaktan" hugot ko pa noong binawi ko ang kamay ko sa kanya. Medyo namumula lang naman yung right hand ko and I'm fine with that tutal left-handed naman ako. It won't affect my writing later kapag discussion na.
"Susko, alam ko namang sanay kang masaktan pero hindi naman ibig sabihin nun na okay lang na lagi kang masaktan" Kris scolded me. I look like a puppy naman. Kris is one of the oldest sa aming magkakaibigan, second to Raine the gurang and is very protective to us. Though sometimes she's quite when with other people but she's kwela kapag kami-kami lang.
"Opo na nga po, madam. Mag-iingat na po sa susunod" I just blantanly replied para tapos na.
"Eng eng, anong mag-iingat na sa susunod? Wala nang susunod" bulyaw pa nitong pabiro sa akin pero napangiti na lang ako. I love the feeling that someone cares for me.
"Tsaka iyong kay Kuya Uno, hinay-hinay ka mars ah. Komplikado masyado. Kahit naman gwapo iyon at may hitsura, hindi ka dapat magpaka rupok at mag habol dahil mukhang meron na iyong girlfriend." bilin pa nito. Kaagad namang bumalik sakin iyong sinabi niya kanina na mayroon na syang girlfriend. Namatay Kaagad iyong kilig na nararamdaman ko at napalitan ng agam-agam..
" Sige Kris, noted yan dito" I replied while pointing my index finger to my head.
Crossing her arms and her eyebrows wiggling, Kris said"Aysus, kung noted yan sa utak mo baka naman hindi noted sa puso mo. Dapat informed din puso mo sa memo na off-limits sya"
"Susko lintek na memo yan. Kung pwede lang naman kasi wala na lang jowa para happy na lang eh" biro ko pa pero iyon naman hinihiling ko.
"Gaga" sabi pa nito sa akin at binalik na iyong atensyon niya sa notebook na hiniram kanina kay Jeanne.
Napatitig naman ako sa ballpen na nakalapag sa table ko. I just sighed sa idea na may jowa na pala iyong pang-anim kong crush. Paano kasi ay iyong si crush number 1, mag kaibigan naman kami pero di sya attracted sakin or to anyone. Asexual ata ang loko. Si crush number 2 naman, ayun nasa ibang bansa na. Si crush number 3, may jowa na tapos si crush number 4 naman ay hindi ko na schoolmate kasi at college na. Si crush number 5 naman, si Grayson ay mayroong pinagseselos lamang, kalandian ko lang pero di seryosohan.
Ano ba yan, lahat ng choices ko di pwede. Akala ko pa naman ay the more the merrier! Dumagdag pa si Kuya Uno, na kahit gwapo ay may jowa na. I was even mystefied kung ilang taon na sya. Is he twenty years old or twenty-one? Or younger than that? Or older than that? Ang hirap matukoy kasi parang forever young iyong pagmumukha niya. Hindi kumukupas.
The day went well. Though it's too long for me dahil may quizzes and performance tasks, hindi naman ganoong napagod iyong katawan ko. But my mind, iyon ang napagod kakaisip, ayoko na kasi kumumplika pa lahat.
"Joe, pwede ba tayo mag-usap?" I heard Grayson told me habang inaayos ko ang bag ko. I saw how my friends reacted, kapwa mga nakakunot ang noo.
"We need to talk about us" dagdag pa nito.