** m o v e 0 1 2 **
<< r e i j i >>
"W-WAIT, EISUKE! WHERE ARE WE GOING?!"
Eisuke has been dragging me by my wrist since we left Haru's bar. I've been asking him since — why did he come to the bar? Why is he angry?And where is he taking me?, but I never got even a single answer from him. His grip on my wrist was so tight I'm afraid it'll leave a mark. And it's starting to hurt too.
All the people we passed by would look at us with curious eyes and I tried not to meet anyone's eye.
"Eisuke?!" I kept calling his name but he just wouldn't respond, not even a single glance.
Eisuke turned to an alley, it's dark and empty. My heart started pounding so hard wondering why would Eisuke bring me here. But he didn't stop pacing and dragging me along, until we reached the other end of the alley.
"Eisuke, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" I shook his hand off me but he just wouldn't bulge. Thankfully, he stopped and turned to finally look at me. I waited for him to speak but he just kept staring at me, "Answer me. Where are you taking me?!"
"We're here, senpai." He answered coldly. There was no hint of anger on his face anymore but I could feel it, he's still furious, or maybe annoyed, as always.
What have I done, again, for him to be this angry?
I looked around me but all I could see were love hotels. Just a moment ago, I was supposed to be here with Giro-san if only Eisuke didn't suddenly appear, dragging me out the bar.
"What are we doing here?" I actually have an idea why we're here but pretend not to, rather, I refused the idea.
"You'll know once we're inside." Then he started dragging me inside one of the buildings.
---
When we entered the room Eisuke rented, he impatiently pushed me on the bed and I fell on my back. He climbed up soon after, hovering on top of me in a sitting position. I watched as he took off his shirt. I was staring at his muscular chest, unconsciously, and when our eyes suddenly met, he just smirked at me.
"Who was that guy earlier?" He asked, wearing a dead serious expression on his face.
"Giro-san? He's Haru's regular customer."
"And what is Haru's regular customer planning, leaving the bar with you?"
I turned my head to avert my gaze, "Why do I have to explain my business with you?"
My eyes fixed on the white wall of the room, while Eisuke fell silent for a second. Suddenly, I heard the clinking of metal and then I felt my belt being unfastened. I immediately turned to look at Eisuke and he was about to unzip my pants when I grabbed his hand, stopping him.
"What are you doing?!"
"You guys were about to do this right?" He shoved my hands and swiftly pulled my zipper down. "So why can't I?"
He pulled down my pants and underwear, revealing my still limp dick. His gaze travelled up to my face and I could clearly see a hint of annoyance in his expression. Then without saying anything, he bent down bringing his face close to my cock, so close his lips grazed against my skin as if kissing it. Immediately, I felt his soft and wet tongue caressing me, starting from its head up to the base. Over and over, as if he couldn't get enough.
My body shuddered as I felt myself getting extremely turned on. I watched as Eisuke took my, now, half-hard dick inside his mouth, slowly and carefully as if teasing me. It's so hot inside his mouth. And the way he's sucking while thrusting vigorously along my length, was making my mind all muddled up. I just wanted to surrender myself at his mercy.
"E-Eisuke…" I reached for his head, grasping a good chunk of his hair. "I'm gonna…mnnh."
He kept on thrusting and sucking me until I'm about to reach my limit. I tried to pull his head up so he could let go of my dick before I cum but before I could climax, he stopped and pulled himself up. He immediately reached for my rock-hard dick, squeezing it so tight I winced in pain.
When I opened my eyes again, I found Eisuke staring at me with such an intense look in his eyes.
"Say Senpai…" he started saying, "You have no reason to throw me away, I'm not in love with you."
"I have all the reasons why we should stop this." I didn't avert my gaze this time, "I believe you're aware of that."
His hand started moving, jerking me off. His grip around me was still so tight and yet he's moving so fast along my length. I couldn't help my body tensing up from the sensation—my back arched up and my toes curled, as I'm about to reach climax for the second time tonight.
"Eisuke…" Any second now, I'm reaching my limit and he never once slowed down. I closed my eyes and let the sensation take over my whole body.
"Senpai…" Eisuke's voice was so quiet, I almost couldn't hear him over my panting. "You're in love with Yuma, right?"
I climaxed. My whole body shivered as cum squirted out my dick.
"Ha?!" Did I hear him right? Did he say that I'm in love with Yuma? "What the hell are you saying?!"
"The reason why you couldn't bring yourself to say the name of Yuma's girlfriend, why you're unhappy everytime Yuma stays over at Eri-san's place, and why you got so upset after Yuma, who's with Eri-san that time, called you on your birthday and why you begged Natsuki-san to hold you, is all because you've been in love with Yuma all this time."
My heart kicked in against my chest. How did he know all about that? I've been hiding this feeling so well all these years and yet, Eisuke found out after just a few weeks of staying with us? How?
More importantly, why? Why does he care so much?
"How could I have such feelings for my best friend? Do you realize how disgusted he'd be if he heard you say that?" I let go a soft yet awkward chuckle. That's the only way I could prevent my loneliness and self-pity from taking over me.
"And the reason why you're so adamant about having sex with me and you keep on insisting about not letting Yuma know about us, is not because I am your best friend's cousin… it's because you don't want him to hate you."
There's no use denying it, right? There's not even a trace of doubt in his tone. How long has he been observing me to notice this much?
My heart was still pounding so hard as I stared at Eisuke's face, and he's doing just the same. For a moment, the room was filled with nothing but silence. And if he'll only listen closely, he'll find the confirmation in the beating of my heart.
I covered my face with both of my arms. My eyes were suddenly brimming over with tears.
He heaved a deep sigh, "It's fine. Use me to your heart's content to forget about him."
"You're wrong about one thing, Eisuke." I replied, almost instantly. "I didn't have all those meaningless relationships so I could forget Yuma. Yes. At first, when I realized my feelings for him, I wanted to have sex with different men so I could get rid of this feeling. I thought it was wrong for me to love him, I should not feel this way about my best friend. But every time... Every single time, I always find myself thinking and imagining 'Does Yuma kiss like this?', 'Will he touch me this way?', 'Is this how his dick would feel inside me?', `Is he gentle in bed or will he be rough on me?"
I sat up to face Eisuke. Really face Eisuke, this time. He was listening to me so intently, paying close attention to every word I've spoken. He has this serious look on his face but I could tell, he wanted to know more.
"I've had all those meaningless relationships not to forget Yuma but to live my fantasy of being with him. Those men were mere replacements for Yuma! I shouldn't call myself his friend when I have this disgusting feeling inside of me. It's hard... It's so painful being just his friend but still, I don't want to lose him. I don't want him to hate me…" I couldn't hold it anymore. Tears just started streaming down both of my cheeks. Loving Yuma and knowing that I shouldn't is already painful enough, but hearing the words roll out of my tongue as I admit this repulsive feeling is breaking my own heart into a thousand pieces.
Suddenly, I felt Eisuke's hand touch my cheek, wiping away some of my tears. Then he brought his lips to mine, planting a soft kiss. I was surprised by his actions. Why was he being so gentle?
I pushed his body a bit, just enough to gain a distance between us. "Did you not hear me, Eisuke? I said I have this disgusting feeling for your cousin. I'm a horrible person. You should stay away from me."
He clicked his tongue once, looking annoyed.
"This is so annoying." Then he pulled me close to him and wrapped his arms around my body. I could feel his heart pounding against his chest. "That's why I'm telling you… use me to your heart's content."
The warmth of Eisuke's body brought comfort to my helpless and desperate heart. When was the last time I felt safe and vulnerable being in somebody's embrace?