** m o v e 0 1 3 part 2 **
<< r e i j i >>
I'M IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND.
All of these confusing thoughts and this feeling all boils down to the appalling fact that I'm in love with Yuma.
Since when? When did I start feeling this way for him? When?
Why does it have to be Yuma?
Almost everyday, when I'm with him, especially when he's with his girlfriend, has been torturous. I'll be a hypocrite and say I'm a considerate friend who understands and lets my friend be with his partner even if it means our time to hang out together lessens but truth is, I'm trying to stay away and distance myself from them. It kills me seeing them happy and so into each other and I hate why I feel this way.
I love Yuma but I hate that I love him.
So there's no other way, the right thing to do, is to get rid of this feeling.
Forget Yuma.
Maybe if I meet somebody else and come to like him, I could go back to Yuma's side.
While wandering around the city one friday night, I stumbled upon this small, and somewhat hidden bar close to the station. I gently pushed the door open, followed by the sound of feng shui chimes clinking. I scanned the area and heaved a sigh of relief when there's not many people inside, then I walked towards the counter where a tall guy stood behind it.
He looked up, giving me a judging look with his half-slanted eyes. If it's in normal circumstances, I've already scorned him for it but for now, It doesn't even matter.
"Hi. One beer please." I said as I sat on the stool across from him.
He walked to the fridge behind him and grabbed three bottles of beer, before walking back at me placing all the bottles on the counter. He leaned down, pulling a glass from the cabinet then placing it on top of the counter as well.
"Looks like you need more." His lips curved up into a charismatic smile. "This is the first time I see you here. Welcome. I'm Haru."
"Y-Yeah. I'm Reiji." I filled the glass with beer then drank everything in one go.
'Ugh, that's great.'
I glanced at Haru and I found him already staring at me. It made me a bit conscious, so I averted my eyes and they landed on his right arm, it was covered with tattoos.
"Oh, that's sexy." My thoughts left my mouth before I even realized it. "Shit! Sorry. I just thought…"
He chuckled, his deep voice resonated in my ears. "Don't worry, Reiji, I get that a lot. Oh, do you want to see?"
"Can I?"
"Of course. It's one of the main attractions of this bar." He joked as he pulled up his sleeve revealing a full view of the tattoos etched on his right arm.
I leaned forward to get a closer look, from his forearm, branches of cherry blossoms making their way up, behind the flowers were waves inspired by The Great Wave Off Kanagawa and a sun shining brightly was inked on his bicep.
It was beautiful.
AFTER A FEW DRINKS, Haru and I were already chatting comfortably and a couple of guys sat beside me joining in on our conversation.
It didn't take long for me to realize that this place is not your ordinary bar. Yes, you could hang out here comfortably but it's also a meet up place for gay men. But of course, there's nothing indecent going on and the people here all seem nice and friendly.
Despite how he looks, Haru is a nice guy and he's really easy to talk to. Though, he seems flirty at times, which makes me wonder if it's just his personality.
Or, is he making a move on me?
I wonder… will he agree to spend the night with me?
Right, it was my intention all along. Meet someone who's just like me, fall in love with them to forget about my feelings for Yuma and then come back to Yuma's side.
A couple more drinks and I'm already wasted. I needed that to push through with my plan. I don't want to go back home, achieving nothing.
'Should I ask Haru?'
I looked behind me and found Haru happily chatting with a group of customers on another table. My heart was pounding so hard against my chest. It's not like it's gonna be my first time but, this is the first time I'm doing it with, basically, a stranger.
"Excuse me…"
I turned around and there's a guy already standing beside me. He looked a few years older, decent looking and clean shaven.
"Yes?"
"Actually, I've been watching you from my table and I thought you looked really beautiful. I wonder if you'd like to spend the night with me?"
This is the first time we talked, I don't even know his name, and he doesn't seem to know mine either. I've already set my mind to ask Haru but what if he rejects me?
"Thank you for the offer but I already have someone to ask in mind…"
He smiled at me, "Are you going to ask Haru?"
My eyes widened, "How did you know?"
He shrugged, "Well, for some reason, Haru's the first target of every first timer of this bar." He paused for a second, "But Haru already has a partner, so he'll most likely reject your invitation."
"Haru has a partner?"
He nodded. "By-the-way, I'm Akihito, just call me Aki. And your name?" Aki offered his hand for a handshake.
I reached for his hand, "Reiji."
"So… would you like to give me a try?" He smiled at me as he gently squeezed my hand.
***
AKI AND I MADE LOVE UNTIL THE BREAK OF DAWN.
It was exciting and it felt good but as soon as it ended, all I could feel was emptiness. Aki was lying beside me, we're both naked under the sheet, but all I could think about was Yuma.
'Is he at home?'
'Is he wondering where I am?'
'Is he looking for me?'
I sat up and reached for my bag, pulling out my phone from the back pocket. I immediately checked for new call registers, maybe Yuma gave me a call, but there was nothing; I looked at my messages, maybe Yuma sent me a text or a chat, but, again, there was nothing.
My heart sank the moment I realized that he's probably staying with Aya tonight. While I'm having sex with a stranger to forget about him, he's making love with her because they both feel the same way with each other.
I felt pathetic but I'd rather feel that way than this love.
---
"So, Is this a one-time thing, or would you like to meet again?" Aki asked while fixing the buttons of his shirt, as we're preparing to check out.
"No. It's…" I paused, careful of my words, "It's a one-time thing, yeah."
Disappointment plastered on his face but he immediately pulled it back, "I understand. I had a great night, Reiji."
"Yeah. Me too." I smiled at him.
He smiled back, "Then… See you again at the bar."
When I came back home, I walked into an empty apartment.
Yuma doesn't even know I stayed out all night.
To be continued...