PROPITIOUS MOMENTS
6 FEBRUARY,2000 DELHI
THE HIGHEST HAPPINESS ON THE EARTH IS THE HAPPINESS OF MARRIAGE
The moment I wake up, get bogged by the thought! OMG! Today is my big day! My life is going to change today and I'll be turned from Miss to Mrs.; Sammy's and Sania's little sister, Daddy's angel and Mumma's pampered 'shaitaan' is grown up to shoulder a responsibility of a new family; new relationship.
"My bebu has woke up!" Mumma gets emotional while kissing my forehead. She brings two cups of tea with my favorite biscuits. I get surprised to see this as she never let me have tea without brushing my teeth, she gets annoyed seeing me having bed tea. I glance at her with mock innocence and want to say something but words don't help me, can't say anything. Sania joins us with a cup of tea. 'There is something in the nature of tea that leads us into a world of quiet contemplation of life.'
"Get up beta, you've to do many rituals, so go and take a shower', Sania says and gives me a warm hug.
After taking bath I wear a red suit. My two Mamas (maternal uncles) accompanies me or better to say escorts me to a living room while covering me with a red Phulkari (An embroidered dupatta or piece of crepe embroidered shawl with silk colorful threads) embroidered by my Nani (Grandmother). My Mama gives me a gold ring as a token of blessings. All ladies are sitting there and singing wedding songs. Sania makes me sit for Choora (Bangle ceremony). My Mama gets red Choora for me and helps me wearing the Choora. My hands are looking beautiful with intricate Mehendi designs and Choora acts like a cherry on a cake. Wow! The sanctity of the Choora is incomparable!
I get ready for the beauty parlor. While I and Sania is going to sit in Sammy's car, Mumma gets emotional again, "ek baar apna ghar to dekh le beta, teri vidai to Banquet se hi ho jani (since you'll leave from Banquet after marriage, just have a look of your house again). I get failed to stop my tears that I have been holding in my eyes since morning. I will come here as a visitor now. I am taking the memories of this house, my castle with me... These memories will never be replaced by the new though may fade.
In the car, Sammy and Sania are discussing something about arrangements, I can't hear anything as my thoughts of leaving my house overwhelm me. My mental conflict reminds me Sarojini Naidu's 'Palanquin Bearers', which is about the mixed feelings of a bride; sweet and bitter feelings. The bride is going to her husband's home to start a new life to live her dreams, but she is, at the same time, thinking about her parental house which she's going to leave behind......
My track of thoughts gets interrupted when Sammy stops the car. We reach parlor at around 8 a.m. Sammy drops us there and headed towards banquet hotel to see the arrangements. Parlor crew has all set to ready to turn a simple girl into a gorgeous bride (hope so...). My mood changes on reaching here as everyone makes me feel special. I have been given a glass of juice to drink and made sit on a big chair while turning my back to the mirror. I hate this! How would I see my make-up?
Well! After make- up, they set up my hair in a fancy hairdo; center-parted bun adorned with fresh mogra flowers. They complete the look with a maang tikka. Weight on my head makes me irked but I have to bear it, I know. After getting free from make-up and hairdo I wear my Lehenga.... Wow! My raw silk Lehenga is blush pink adorned in renaissance embroidery embellished with silver-gold metal threads, pearl beads with pink dupatta embellished in a same style as of lehenga. I pair it with six-inch pearly satin heels with stone detailing. The gold and pearl jewelry compliment my lehenga! I have got turned to mirror to see myself as a bride. I gush about how gorgeous I am looking! Sania comes closer and hugs me. My cousin comes to take us to wedding venue.
In India, a marriage is not limited to just two people forming a bond. It is celebrated as a grand occasion which creates fond memories which we remember for a lifetime.... Even during the worst part of our life...
I enter the wedding venue with my sister where I am received by my cousins at the gate. The Baraat has not yet arrived. So, I am being taken to a big room where the photographer clicks my photographs in a typical bridal pose. My Mumma comes and stops at some distance as my photos are being taken. I can see admiration in my Mumma's moist eyes.
As the 'Baraat' arrives I have been escorted to the wedding stage by my friends and cousins where Sartaj is waiting for me. He's looking like a Prince waiting for his princess in his beige Sherwani. He comes forward and gives his hand when I put my foot on the first step. I hold his hands, can feel the warmth of his hand. I know he'll never let loosen his grip.... We exchange heavily weaved Jaimala (Garland) of freshly bloomed flowers, signifies the love and respect of bride and groom for each other. We sit on the big chairs exclusively designed for the wedding couple. 'He has chosen sherwani of beige and pink combination, I notice, to complement my pink lehenga. Acha g! He is looking very handsome in trimmed beard and light pink turban. His eyes say everything, that he overwhelms with emotions when locking his eyes with his bride to be. "You are looking very beautiful, divine". He whispers. These words.... I was dying to hear from the man whom I love.
'A million people can tell the bride that she is beautiful but the only time she will listen is when it's said by the man, she loves'
It's time to take vows in front of Babaji, to take phere.
Everything seems like a dream!
Around 16.00 hrs, my Doli gets ready and it's time to bid farewell to my family, friends and relatives. Goodbye to my Daddy who, I know, is present here. While walking towards my Doli, my wedding car, I am throwing handfuls of rice over my head into my mother's dupatta symbolizes that I am repaying my parents for all that have been given to me so far. My heart sinks when I think about leaving Mumma. I am crying, I try my best to control but not now. My crying Mumma hugs me, my Mumma's hug.... I have to cover a distance when I want to hug her next time.... Sania comes, Sammy comes, Garry and everybody one by one hugs me and try to make me calm, gives blessings.
I, finally, leave and embark on a new journey................
While sitting in the car, I am looking back where my family is standing... I can't see them now, is this because of my blurred eyes which are still full of tears or have I left them behind?
The wedding car reaches at 18.00 hrs. at its destination, my destination; my new home which seems to welcome me with open arms ( I feel so… ). At the door of my husband's bungalow, his sisters stop us to do some rituals. Sartaj holds my hand and we enter the house together. The house is full of new faces, trying to put me at ease, is somewhat comforting. After having tea and snacks, Sartaj's sister takes me to a room which is adjacent to the drawing room. I sit in a big room but it's not designed like as my sister describes about their rooms. The bed on which I am sitting seems to be quite old. I know that after few minutes I'll be taken to my room...oh.... Sartaj's room. I stand and go towards the wall, a big and long wall, covered with curtains. I, hesitantly; slowly, pulls the curtains. The huge transparent glass doors decently framed open to a spacious balcony. Although I want to open the door and feel the cold breeze, I decide to stand inside only. I can see the sky from there. The stars winked like sequins on a dark velvet gown. I get distracted by the knock on the door. Sartaj's presence gives me secured feeling that I am not alone here. He has changed into a grey night suit and looking fresh and as handsome as he looks in every attire. His closing the door makes me nervous. Today is going to be a first night of my wedding and in this room! I manage to hide my feelings and smile. He sits on the bed and I too. He initiates, "Would you like to have coffee? Must be feeling tired. You didn't have tea there, I noticed." "Yes", I reply. He goes out for a minute and comes back. I am relaxed now in Sartaj's company. We begin talking about in general. I really feel headache due to heavy bun and lots of hair pins are used for my hairdo. So, feeling irritated. Sartaj, as usual, reads my mind. "Are you okay?" he calmly asks. 'These hair pins and big bun bother me', I reply. To my surprise, he gets up immediately on his knees and starts removing my hair pins. He is excellent at everything he does! Although he is not touching me the first time, I shiver when feel his fingers on my neck. Gently he removes the pins and open my hair and sits again. I don't know what to say. After a while his sister enters with two cups of coffee. She looks at my hair and smiles, "tum log shuru bhi ho gaye". (you people have already started!) I feel insulted and shocked to see my sister in law's behavior on the very first day. I make myself calmed. Sartaj looks at me while sipping his coffee. I am waiting for somebody to come and take me to my room, Sartaj's room. This room is spacious with big attach bathroom. I like the bathroom. It is black tiled with big black bath tub, the size of the tub is as big as my bedroom in my parents' house but I don't like the bedroom. The bed is old with old bed-sheet. I don't understand even if they want us to relax here for few hours, they should have changed the bed-sheet. I have never used this kind of bed-sheet in my house. Is this the life style of Rich people? I might have misunderstood them. This room might have been used by guests or children.... Ohhh...leave.
Around 21.00 hrs. my sister in law enters to call us at the dinner table that makes me shocked again. But I go with Sartaj, tie my hair before leaving, to have my first dinner in my new house. Everybody is looking at me, I am trying to evade all negative vibes which disturb me from the moment I entered the house. I think the dinner was cooked in the evening and not even reheated for us. Missing Mumma who never lets me eat this kind of food. I don't understand what is happening. I look at Sartaj who's eating quietly as he is ordered to sit and eat.
After dinner, his cousin comes and smiles at me, I smile back. She says, "Bhabhi, let me take you to your room". I thank to God, finally I'll see my room!
His cousin takes me to the room, the most stylish royal bedroom I've ever seen in my life. Although my and other bedrooms in my house are not less attractive or stylish but this is something beyond words! 'How could I ever have had the presumptions! I shouldn't have animosity towards my in-laws. I regret of thinking negative about my in-laws. Sartaj's room is beyond my imagination. The gorgeous room with king size white tufted bed invites me to sleep and forget the world. It's kind a room I'm striving for or every girl dream of! The lace pattern wallpaper oozes glamour. The sophisticated decor of the room complements my Sartaj's calm nature. I asked him several times about his room but he changes the topic every time. He wanted to give me a surprise. Oh, I love you for this surprise. Being a pastel color admirer, white bedroom is the dream comes true! A glass chandelier hangs low over the bed, wow, it glistens and sparkles against all the metallic and non-metallic tones of the room... But the thing still pinches me... it doesn't look like a newlyweds' bedroom; no flowers, no fragrances. The white frilled curtains sooth my eyes and mind but if it had