{[Jane}]
It felt pretty weird waking up at Matt's place the next morning. Even weirder to wake up in his arms.
His head tilted back as he snored ever so lightly. He looked so peaceful and at ease, I felt kind of bad for having to wake him up, but I needed the loo pretty urgently.
I gently peeled his arm off me, making him snore louder and stir. I closed my eyes and hoped I haven't woken him up as I quietly got up and sneaked out of the lounge and back to my room.
It was about just past six and still pitch dark inside the apartment as I maneuvered my way down the passage. I finally made it to my room after what felt like forever, blissfully getting into my comfy bed before saddling up my laptop to do some work.
[Once again, Matthew Zwei - my knight in dented armor - has come to my rescue to save me from yet another poisonous relationship and tend to my gushing open wounds. Sometimes I just sit and think - realize even - just how little I really appreciated everything this man has done for me. The way he'd drop everything in a millisecond to be wherever I needed him to be...
But I just wasn't ready to try and work on a relationship. Not just yet. What we had was good - and I didn't want to loose that.
What if we fought?
What if he hated my morning breath or my derailed hairstyle when I got up in the morning?
What if he didn't like the food I made him?
What if I just wasn't his type of girlfriend material?
And then it hit me.
I'd never know if I didn't try.
I'd never forget that day he confronted Kyle. The day he came back to Chicago with a missing tooth and an awful black eye - a huge victorious smile spread across his boyish face.
'I don't know why you make such a scene about some useless piece of pussy. She wasn't even that good,' he mumbled as he spat out some blood while he spoke to me on the phone. 'I showed him what a useless piece of pussy looked like when the medics scraped him off the floor,' he added with a chuckle. 'Nobody will ever speak of you like that again. Ever.'
No one would ever care for me like Matthew did, and the sooner I man up and admit it, the better.
For the both of us.]
***
I must have fallen asleep. Getting that weird feeling of being watched as I struggled to focus. A smiling Matt stood in the doorway, chuckling at the ground as he shook his head.
"Too scared to let me sleep with you?" he asked, watching me from beneath his long bangs.
I turned scarlet and drew the sheet up to my chest. "It's not that," I answered, unable to keep myself from smiling back at him.
"Breakfast is ready," he said, pointing back at the kitchen. "I tried to brew some fresh coffee."
"Tried?" I teased.
"Dude, I do not do coffee in the mornings. I usually settle down with and ice cold beer, watch football replays and scratch my balls," he answered with a shrug.
"Oh my god. Tee em eye, Matt," I answered, tossing the sheet off me and walking over to him.
I hit his shoulder and he laughed, his eyes fixated on my lips, slowly moving to my eyes. There was an undeniable tension between us, yet fear kept me frozen in place.
He snapped out of his daydream and shoed me off to the kitchen.
I wined and fought back which only made him laugh more. I took a seat at the table while he handed me a plate of misformed pancakes and poured me a cup of coffee.
I thanked him and took a grateful gulp, instantly regretting it. It was bitter as hell, but I swallowed it down and gave him a genuine smile.
"Its good. Might need some twitches here and there, but that's what I'm here for." I said with a wink.
"Now... Uhm... We kinda have got an Award nomination for our last single and I..." he started, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.
I dropped my knife and fork and poked his chest. "Let me guess, you don't have a date?" I joked.
"Yeah..." he answered, sounding nervous as hell, "So I was wondering if... Uhm... If you'd like to..."
I drew him over the counter and crushed his lips to mine, feeling his entire posture relax. "You've got a deal, but on one condition," I replied with my most mischievous smile.
"Anything," he replied, swallowing back the lump in his throat.
"I am [not] your girlfriend," I whispered against his lips.