We started with our lesson and he is making it difficult to concentrate on the topic. We were seated side by side, anyone would know that it's easier to teach someone something when they are beside you rather than any place else. I would be looking at what I'm teaching him then I'll occasionally notice him making quick glances at me. My pants are getting uncomfortably tight now and him, being only in his boxers is not helping in any way to soothe it.
"Something wrong?" he said to me from out of nowhere.
"None. I'm fine, but I am worried about your crotch being able to pitch a tent with the lack of one." I said and looked at him.
"Well… maybe you can help me get this tent down. It was easy putting it up but…" he replied with a grin on his face, that just made it EVEN MORE difficult than it already was.
"Mr. Madigan, I don't appreciate what you're doing. Go and have a change of decent clothes now or you're going to need to find another tutor." I ordered.
"Well I guess our Chemistry isn't mixing well… for now. Wait here…" he said, stood and left.
After a while, which was enough to help me collect myself, he came back wearing jeans and a plain white shirt. Which, if I may add, is the style I find extremely attractive with guys.
"Damn! This guy is a master of seduction." I thought to myself.
He's fully clothed this time… but it did not change anything. I need to focus; I came here to teach him Chemistry and based on what we have gotten into so far… he knows the subject. I have a feeling I'm not here for that… I'm obviously here for a different kind of Chemistry.
"So Ford…" he said.
"Please don't address me so casually. I'm you're tutor and we do not know each other." I said.
"I'm so sorry your highness." he said while laughing.
We exchanged insults after a while and I didn't even realize it, that within that two hour tutoring session, I was already in good terms with him. He was nice… but that fact stayed that I know I should not go back for the second tutoring session. I left happily but at the same time I felt weird. I don't want to go back and at the same time I wanted to. I think I'm becoming bipolar? Anyhow, the day was good but it's time I retired for the night.
The sun rises and morning comes. I had no tutoring session and I also had no classes for the day. So I guess I'm staying in, I had no projects either so I'll be playing some games. I took a nice cold bath to wake myself up, got dressed and left for a while to buy breakfast as well as some snacks for my gaming-sesh. It took about an hour to get everything I needed which was new since it usually takes me less than thirty minutes to do this. I had several bags of food and snacks on my left hand and my phone on the right. I saw I had three missed calls and a message; all of them were from the tutoring department president. I knew I had no assignments nor did I forget turn in anything so it's weird she'd phone me. I checked her message and she said that Mr. Madigan… rather Brad was free today and wanted to spend some extra time tutoring. I had plans already so I just replied with a simple-flat "No." while I walked back to my dorm room I got another text message from her… "Too late. :D"
I was confused but I found out exactly what she meant when I saw Brad standing in front of my dorm room waiting.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" I said.
"Whoah! You kiss your mother with that mouth?" He replied and laughed.
"Look I said no and I already made plans for today. I even brought some snacks for myself." I explained and raised my hand holding the bags of food.
"Then good, I'll join you." he said then gave me that bone-breaking-heart-warming-skin-melting-world-shattering-smile.
That's what it took, just one smile and my brain completely shut off. We spent the day together… this was the second day and yet I've fallen for him deeper than Mariana's Trench. We played games; he enjoyed the same games that I did. I didn't think he was a gamer… I thought he'd be the more social-extroverted type. We played for what feels like eons but turns out it was only three hours.
"I guess that's that for this session." He said out of the blue.
"I'm sorry, what?" I asked, perplexed.
"I only asked for a three-hour tutoring session, so I have to go; can't stay longer because they check." He said.
"I see… wait, tutoring? We spent three hours playing. I didn't tutor you." I said.
"Yeah… you'll get paid for this session. Don't worry. I did advance reading on the subject you were supposed to cover today so you don't have to worry me failing the quizzes on this topic." He explained again.
I pointed to him that that's not right. I don't need to be paid since I didn't do any tutoring. He just smiled and said I can do what I want to. He'd still report that I tutored him for the day because I had no choice. I could feel my heart racing… I felt like I had Tachycardia with how fast my heart beat is. He again gave me a simple smile and left.
I got paid as he said… so when the next rest day came for another three-hour tutoring session I bought food with the money I got. He arrives at my place and we spent more time together.
"Well that ends this session don't you think? We covered everything and got my fair share of that paycheck." he said and laughs.
"Who said were done? You are on an extended session today. I picked up two lessons; you will be taking this tutoring in advance because I can't make it to our next session." I said.
"Where will you be?" He asked.
"Really? I tell you that you will be taking another lesson now and you're more interested as to why I'd be gone?" I asked him.
"What? *laughs* It's cool. I can take another one. So alright then… let's get started?" He said.
He kept that interest in his eyes and it was fun. I liked it. This session was awfully long and the second topic was way too much to handle. He got it fast… and I was sure he really knew it but he's good at faking ignorance. The day ends and he needed to go back to his dorm I walked him to my door but he stops…
"So… where exactly will you be going?" He asked
"Why the sudden interest?" I asked and smiled.
"Nothing… I just wanted to know where my tutor will be." He replied.
"I'm going to meet someone. Not someone you know, obviously. Maybe eat for a while… I don't know. I'll see how the night goes with him." I answered.
"Oh okay. Well have fun then. I'm sure he'll have a blast." He said then walked away.
I really wasn't going anywhere, I just said that to see how he'd react. He looked like a wet puppy walking in the rain of depression. It felt nice that he was jealous… or maybe it was just me. Anyhow… that's how it was.
This went on for days, weeks and even months… on times I had classes I'd pay him a visit for a two-hour tutoring session and on our rest days we'd have a three-hour one. Of course, the rest day tutoring wasn't exactly tutoring. He became more attentive and I have gotten softer on him. My defense was completely down… it scared me. I don't know if it's real or what, but it makes me want to try. He's out of my league, really he is. But the way he smiles at me, the way he looks at me and the way he talks to me makes me feel like I have a chance. I have always been scared to fall in love because I never thought myself to be lovable… at least in a significant other sort of way. Anyhow, the semester was ending and once it does so is the Chemistry subject. So I guess I'll just wait it out and never speak of it again. It's funny how we can call it a tutoring session when more often than not we don't really go over most lessons since he knows it… like I said, this was a completely different Chemistry that we were having.
I paid a visit to the library to get the last hand-out for our tutoring.
"Here you go, this semester's last topic. You're an amazing tutor you know." Sara said. Sara is a third year college student and the tutoring department president.
"How so?" I asked.
"Well, just compare the results." She said and brought out a sheet-list of his scores on quizzes and exams.
His scores were insanely low if not a failure before the tutoring and then he perfected almost all of them on topics that I tutored him on. I was meant to tutor him on everything but I got sick for about four days and I wasn't able to tutor him. He passed the quizzes then but his score definitely dipped during that week. The list also showed the topics and it was topics he knew. I talked to him about it when we finished tutoring early. It almost looked like he was purposely failing his exams and quizzes. Of course… he needed to fail on those I didn't teach him. If he continues to score well the tutoring department will think he can move forward on his own and cancel all tutoring sessions thereafter. He's purposely trying to spend time with me. Now that I think about it, we never really spent any time outside tutoring hours… it was always just within those times. It's not like I don't understand… someone as popular as him cannot be seen with someone like me. It's a social taboo… two people of different species.
"Something wrong?" Sara asks suddenly snapping me back to reality.
"Nothing. Why does everyone constantly ask me if something is wrong?" I asked.
"It's just your eyes… they notice, see and observe too many things. It's like you always know what's up." She explained.
"Thanks for sugar-coating that, most people just say I have judgmental eyes." I said and laughed.
I left the library and went straight to my dorm. Tomorrow will be the last tutoring session. I sat on my bed and thought how tomorrow would go… hopeless.
The sun shines and again I find myself completely at loss thinking that this is the last session. Why does it bother me so much? This is the last day… I'd be free of tutoring him and I don't have to worry about anything else. I was awfully depressed from the thought of it that I didn't even bother to dress well. I was just wearing a plain black shirt, cropped pants and sandals. I bought some food like usual and went back. I decided to make this last session be something at night… it would be better since I get to cry myself to sleep afterwards. He had no problem with it and he even joked it will be a romantic tutoring. It was seven in the evening when an expected knock echoed through my room. I open it and of course there he was smiling at me. I smiled politely back but I guess he noticed I wasn't well.
"Come in." I said.
"Thanks!" With full energy he replied. I've never heard gratitude like that before.
He was oddly talkative and energetic. I couldn't keep up. I taught him the lesson and we finished in less than fifteen minutes for a topic so long.
"I guess this concludes our tutoring session." I said.
"Right… yeah. So what do you want to do? We still have two hours and forty-five minutes left." He asked.
I didn't reply. I didn't know what to say. I know I would miss him… it's frustrating.
I snapped back when he suddenly pinches my cheeks.
"Owww! What was that for?!" I exclaimed.
"You look occupied, just trying to bring you back to reality. I think we should watch a movie. I actually brought one with me." He said.
He puts the movie and lets it play. He came ready… the intro of the movie was enough to tell me that it was romance. Interesting…
"This one is my favorite of its genre. It's a classic and the plot is very common and old. But it's good nonetheless." He said.
"Oh…" I don't know why I said that. I guess it was better than silence.
I was quiet and he was telling the story as it goes. It was nice. I smile and laugh occasionally. We got to a point of something serious; the guy is going to confess to the girl he liked. Brad faced me and I looked at him.
"You have been the most amazing and difficult part of my life." he mimics the movie. It really is his favorite. He memorized the lines. He says it along with the character.
"I have watched you for so long. You were just a figure I could never be near… I saw my chance and I grabbed it. I know you and I are different. If I could just stay to what we have now just to keep you that would be enough for me." He continues… he's really getting into character.
"I know it will come to an end… so I tried to prolong it when I could. Each day that I spent with you has been fun and memorable." I choked a laugh when he said that. This is so convincing… I wonder if he did theater before.
"Don't laugh, please… it hurts. What I feel for you is real and I want you to know that. I could spend days and nights looking at your face. Just talking… playing… eating; I would do anything with you." He goes on… this sequence is awfully long… but it makes me feel warm. I think my guard is dropping… he's even holding my hands now. He is so into character… I wonder how he'd react if he knew that I've watched this movie before and I know the lines, too.
"Sometimes I wanted to hold you but couldn't. I wanted to touch you but you were off limits. It drives me crazy just thinking of you…" He paused just like the guy in the movie… it's the girl's time to make drama.
"What if I tell you that I'd let you hold me… that I'd let you touch me. Would you and if you do… why?" I said along with the girl in the movie… I say this in sync with her but they're real.
"Why? You know why… you've felt it, too. I know you do." he replied as he comes closer.
"Then say it… I want to hear it come out of your mouth. Deep and real." I said to him…
"Because… I love you." he says and stops.
The movie goes silent all of a sudden. I could only hear the sound of my heart beating and our heavy breathing. He was looking so deeply into my eyes. He comes close… my heart beats faster. He didn't play that movie for no reason… it just came to me now. It's real… he confessed to me. His moving closer and I'm petrified. I can't move and I don't know what to do.
Then there it was… his lips are now on mine. He holds me closer, his arms wrapped around me. My body is burning as he kisses me intensely. He takes my lips; he slides his hand from my back top-down. My arms are clamped between his and I could just hold his face and what I could reach. He slides his tongue into my mouth and I eagerly accept it. I'm losing it, I'm losing myself. There's too much emotion my body is feeling that my brain can't process. Before long we were on the floor already and I was being swallowed by ecstasy. I felt weak… no I am weak. He wraps his arms around me again and I wrap my legs around him. He lifts and carries me to my bed and we continued there. Months have I waited… anticipated… and hoped for this day to arrive; the day that I would succumb to my animalistic instincts. We were like animals in heat… the eagerness for one another were too real. It's too much… I think I'm gonna pass out. Everything is so blurry now. He's using me and I don't give a damn. I like it. I don't know if this will happen again or if this is just a one-time thing… but it doesn't matter. I'll let it happen. If I'm gonna lose it, I'm happy to have lost it to him. We're in the middle of it… he turns me to face him and he moves close and kisses me more. I could hear his muffled moans as he thrusts and kisses. He thrusts harder… faster. I let out a sudden moan with every strong thrust. He kisses me sweetly as he does. I open my eyes a bit to look at him and I see him looking at me. I feel like I'm breaking the more he moves. So this is how it feels like? Very consuming and it makes me feel like I've gone and lost sanity. Or is it because I love him that I willingly submit myself to so much of this? This feels too good… really good… I'm really losing vision now. It's so good I'm starting to see white… and I did.
I lost consciousness. It's strange… I never thought it actually happens but I guess there is such a thing when your body takes too much and the brain just gives up processing it and decides to shut itself down. I wake up and I could see the big clock by my wall… its 5 o'clock in the morning. I slept quite a while, I guess. It feels so warm and it smells good, too. It wasn't until I realized I was lying down in bed with Brad. In shock I sat myself up way too fast, he wakes up but…
"Head rush…" I said as I close my eyes and hold my head.
"Hey now, not too fast." He said and smiled.
I looked at him still in shock that everything turned out to be real. He grabs me by my face and kisses me sweetly… and long.
"Good morning, love." He said.
"Okay wait… I'm still processing this… what the fuck happened?" I asked in confusion.
"Don't you remember? We did a little confession monologue and had amazing sex. I tell you, for someone who's a virgin you know your way around a man's body." He explained.
"That's not what I meant… … … really? Did I do well?" I said then followed up ignoring the main topic.
"Oh yeah…" he hugs me and brings me back to lay down on the bed and kisses me more.
"So what are we now then?" I ask.
"I haven't officially asked have I? Do you want me to ask here or do you want it over a romantic date?" He asks.
"A romantic date would be lovely." I replied.
He smiles and starts to kiss me… again. He is abnormally physical. I guess I've seen that coming. But be that as it may, I can feel the love from his actions. I've always been intuitive… I just wish that my intuition isn't betraying me. Love dulls all your other senses, so I've heard.