Pagsakay ko sa taxi ay naramdaman ko nang magkakafever na ako. Napakainit ng katawan ko pero nilalamig ako ng sobra. Pakiramdam ko ay mawawalan na ako ng malay ano mang oras.
Nagka traffic pa sa route na dinaanan namin kaya natagalan ako ng sobra. Pagdating ko, I forced myself to move, hangang sa nasa elevator na ako. Para narin akong lumulutang, hindi ko na rin alam ang ginagawa ko.
No, i cant pass out here.
....
Pagmulat ng aking mata ay masakit parin ang ulo ko. Gabi na pala. Inilibut ko ang mata ko at nasa kwarto na nga ako. Mabuti naman at nagawa kong makarating sa kwarto ko... huh? Whats with my forehead? Who put this? May mga medicine din sa mesa ko. Ibig sabihin...
"Hey, mabuti't nagkamalay ka. You need to eat now." Nagulat nalang ako. Why? Ba't nandito si vampire? May hawak siyang bowl.
"Why are..." hindi ko naituloy ang tanong ko ng akma niya akong susubuan. Napatitig ako sa kanya.
"C'mon, say ahh." Sabi niya at inilapit ang spoon sa bibig ko. Matindi parin ang sakit ng ulo ko, parang wala ng lakas ang natira sa akin, nilalamig parin ako. So i just opened my mouth and eat it.
"Juk?" Mahinang sabi ko.
"Hm. You know about this too huh." Sagot lang niya habang patuloy akong sinusubuan. Nalaman ko sa dating neighbor ko ang tungkol sa pagkaing ito. They call it juk. Its a warm porridge made from rice, beans, sesame and red beans. Sabi niya koreans serve this whenever someone is recovering from sickness. Saan kaya niya kinuha ang juk na to?
Hindi ko siya magawang malasaan but its warmth really feels good. Hindi ko narin alam ang nararamdaman ko sa ngayun. Until he made me drink some medicine at ihiniga ako sa bed ko. Pakiramdam ko ay mawawalan na naman ako ng malay pero pinilit kong imulat ang mata ko at tumingin sa kanya dahil alam kong paggising ko ay wala na siya sa tabi ko.
"Hey, matulog ka na." Sabi lang niya.
"Ayoko." Mahinang sabi ko habang pinipilit ko paring imulat ang mga mata ko.
"Huh? What are you saying? You know you need to sleep to recover. Mataas pa ang temperature mo. Don't force yourself." Sabi niya.
"But you'll leave kapag tulog na ako. D... don't ... don't leave me alone Jin." Nakita ko nalang na parang nagulat siya. Huh? May nasabi ba ako. Sa kalooban ko lang naman sinabi ang mga salitang yun diba?
"I.. i'll stay here... d..don't worry."
....
Paggising ko ay wala na nga siya. I'm sure sa panaginip ko lang yung mga nangyari kagabi. At nakapagdesisyon narin akong iwasan at kalimutan siya.
So, I spent the whole week living on my own usual routine just before I met that vampire. The only difference is that, I'm being too cautious now so that I won't even see his shadow. I'm desperate to get over him and I think I'm doing well about it. I strictly forbade myself to go in the veranda to avoid not only seeing him but to avoid thinking about him as well. My heart? It's still heavy as a stone but I think time will going to fix it someday. All I have to do is avoid him, so that sooner or later I'm going to get over him completely.
But I keep on becoming weak. My mind is strong enough but it seems that my body is mourning with my heart. I keep on losing my appetite even if I'm trying my best to eat as usual. Now, my body feels so weak.
....
Another week passed by and I'm here waiting for a taxi again. It's raining as usual but I have now my umbrella. Pagdating ko sa building ay hindi ko naabutan ang pagsara ng elevator. I'm afraid na maaaring makita ko siya kapag naghintay ako rito kaya naisip kong dumaan nalang sa stairs.
Nakakalahati na ako at medyo pagod narin. Pero, parang maganda rin ito para at least may exercise ako. Nakatingin lang ako sa bawat step na nasa harap ko nang nakarinig ako ng ingay ng sapatos. Habang pataas ako ng pataas ay lumalapit naman ang ingay ng sapatos na naririnig ko. I think someone is going down. Pero habang papalapit siya ay lumalakas ang tibok ng puso ko. What's happening? Until such time that I think the two of us is getting closer. I never raised my head but I can feel that it's him. Siya lang naman ang nagpapatibok ng puso ko nang ganito.
Huminga ako ng malalim dahil plano kong tumakbo as soon as I passed him. Then, I felt like I stopped breathing now that we're only one step apart. I passed him without raising my head, and I am about to run when he suddenly grabbed my hand. He pushed me in the wall hardly. Lumaki ang mga mata ko at napatingin sa kanya sa ginawa niya. But as soon as I look at his eyes, napalunok ako dahil he looks too serious. Bigla pa siyang lumapit and he put his arms against the wall. Now I felt like I'm being jailed by him.
Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko so I just looked back at him while he is gazing at me with his those serious and gorgeous eyes of him. We stared at each other's eyes. But afterwards, bumuntong hininga siya habang ipinikit niya ang mga mata niya. Then, he open his eyes again. But this time he looks calm now.
"Why are you avoiding me?"
"Why are you acting like this?"
"Why are you doing this?" sunod sunod niyang tanong pero hindi parin ako sumagot.
"Ah.. This is because I shouted at you that day."
"Of course not!" bigla kong sigaw sa kanya. Parang pinapalabas niya na iniiwasan ko siya dahil hindi ko matanggap ang mga sinabi niya. I'm not that narrow minded.
"Then what is it?!" sigaw niya.
"Ah..is this because of Hyunwoo?"
"It's not about him you jerk!! This is all about you!!" galit na sigaw ko agad sa kanya. Then napatigil siya at mukhang nagulat siya. I began to realize what I said. Damn it! Why on earth did those words came out of my mouth? Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko kaya itinulak ko siya at tatakbo na sana ako when he grabbed me back again.
"Let me go. I.. I don't mean..." hindi ko pa natatapus ang sasabihin ko ng magsalita siya.
"If that's the case, then why are you avoiding me?" he seriously said.
"Because it's crazy... it's tiresome... and it's..." hindi ko pwedeng sabihin na it's painful. He will just laugh at me if I'll tell him right?
"I'm... I'm going to forget you. I'll definitely forget everything... everything about you soon!" matigas kong sabi sa kanya.
"Jinja? Really?" he smiled like a devil.
"Fine... Go... go ahead and forget me... But before that, I'm going to give you a good luck gift." Sabi niya as he smirked.
"I don't need your...." Hindi ko na natapus ang sasabihin ko dahil... What's going on? He... he... is ki... kissing me!?
The moment our lips touched, everything seemed stopped. Then, the world just turned into a fairy land filled with magic. I began to go deaf and all I hear is the loud and noisy heart beats of mine. And I think my body is now completely frozen. It feels like it is a fairy tale come true. Ang tanging nararamdaman ko ay pag init nang buong katawan ko. Napakainit at napakalambot ng mga labi niya.
But that fairy tale quickly ended after some seconds.
He moved back and hardly stared at me while i'm still dazed.
And then he just left without even turning back.