I'm at home already, wanted to be relaxed, but I can't! I've been remembering my conversation with Hillary before we finally parted ways.
"Let me help you to get back what you really owned. You're the first man she'd known, the first man who became her friend, the man who loves her first. You deserve to have her."
She's now started walking away, but I called her, "Hillary...I don't think that's a good idea. Ayokong magkagulo kami ng kakambal ko," I said, sincerely.
She smiled as she nodded, "I know you're gonna say that," she said. "That was just a suggestion, but I know you're really not okay about it, so just forget about what I've said," she then turned her back at me and walked again.
I chased her. When I caught her, her usual expression is what I've seen-emotionless. "I don't want you to be selfish," I uttered and still, she got no any expression at all, "you like my twin, I like Veia, but it doesn't mean we need to mess up what they are right now."
She nodded, then she walks again. "Stop following me, Sky," she said.
"You're mad," I'd continue chasing her. Buti na lang wala paring katao-tao sa lugar na 'to kaya I am not hearing sh*ts.
She stopped. She looked at me in tears, "I'm mad, Sky, disappointed...hurt...sad..name all those negative feelings, Sky, lahat 'yon nararamdaman ko ngayon..." she said between her sobs.
I knew it. Kaya ko siya hinabol dahil alam kong may mabigat sa kaloob-kalooban niya and I want her to let it out before she made a thing that she will always feel regretful.
"I really like your twin...and you can't blame me if I feel so down right now," she cries herself out again.
"I know. I understand," I am wanting to come close to her, but I remained 2 meters away. "Let it out, Hillary, let it out," I said.
She wiped her tears, then she said, "I've been keeping my feelings! I've been a damn coward! I've been invisible!" she took a deep breath while her eyes were closed, "how can I confess...when all this time I am nothing to him?" she almost whispered those words, "with all those good mornings and good nights, concerns and sweet words...I thought I was special for him, but no...I'm nothing," she added.
Because I find no words to utter I just embraced her. She's no longer crying, but she's still hugging me back. After a minute, she let go from the hug.
She smiled and said, "that was the last time that you'll see me crying." She then finally walks away and I just watched her faded.
Hillary is very soft on the inside, she really resembles Veia. Don't get me wrong. I am not comparing them because they're both unique. Naalala ko lang talaga si Veia after knowing na iyakin din pala siya.
But, I really need to talk to my twin. I need to clarify what really happened between him and Hillary 4 months ago. I knew that Sun is sometimes a jerk. Nakikipaglaro siya sa mga babaeng nagugustuhan lang siya because he's an almost total package, in short, he loves playing with girls who just want to flirt with him.
Pero, how on earth it happened that he once gave Hillary some false hopes? He doesn't know Hillary likes him, so why play with her? He was concerned and sweet to Hillary, but he doesn't even remember she had a convo with her? Oh, sh*t! I'm so curious to hell!
"Bro," and finally you're here, "what?" he asked when I just stared at him.
"What took you so long? It's now 8 in the evening, Sun," I said.
He sat at the couch, "I had a date, Sky, first serious date, that should be taken so long. We should have dated until dawn if only we don't have class tomorrow," he then smiled.
Okay. I am now in pain seeing my twin happily in love. Tsk. Susuportahan ko na nga sila, 'di ba? But, sh*t, it's so hard! I need to take it slow.
"Do you want to hear what happened for today, Sky, why am I finally courting Veia? Say yes, twin, I want to share my happiness with you."
'H-Happiness? How can I feel that, Sun? Are you kidding me?'
I wanted to say it to him, but it will just ruin everything. Just one wrong move it will create a chain of effects. Magugulo ang lahat. Maraming tanong ang dapat na sagutin. And, it will be very awkward for the three of us. And, I don't want it to happen, I am always avoiding it to occur.
"Go on, Sun, share me your happiness," I uttered and a genuine smile flashed on my twins face.