The Final Chapter of the Game Wars: Between Glory and Exile
And so we come to the grand finale of the Game Wars 2—an event as destructive to the industry as a poorly made remake of a cult classic. The final battle between Lekox 2.0 and Cruel Territories has ended, and, like every great war, it left a glorious victor, a humiliated loser, and a loss that can only be described as "budget level for a developed country."
Phame 10: The Last Cry of Victory
Cruel Territories, with its hype machine and budgets that would make Hollywood look like a school play, ended its legendary franchise with a flourish. Phame 10: The End of the War, Not the End sold 100 trillion dollars, proving that nostalgia and money go hand in hand.
The game featured incredibly realistic graphics, a thrilling narrative, and an ending so epic it made fans cry (especially those who paid for the $50,000 collector's edition). Critics hailed the experience, calling it "a milestone in gaming history" and "a lesson in how to make money without effort." Meanwhile, at Lekox 2.0... Alexandre Pargaz 12: The Titanic of Games Ah, the disaster. If Phame 10 was the equivalent of a Disney princess wedding, Alexandre Pargaz 12 was the reception where the cake caught fire and the groom ran away. The game sold a measly $10 million, a number so insignificant compared to the investment that Russia declared emotional bankruptcy. Critics were merciless: ❌ "The story seems to have been written by a depressed robot." ❌ "The gameplay is so repetitive that we played the same level five times without realizing it." ❌ "If this game were a movie, it would be directed by Uwe Boll."
Total loss: $89 trillion.
Russia's reaction: "Excuse me, we need to talk to Carpilo..."
Carpilo: From Visionary CEO to Russia's Number 1 Fugitive
After the financial (and moral) collapse of Lekox 2.0, Carpilo realized that his career had evaporated faster than a server on MMO launch day. He tried to flee the country disguised as a Yakisoba delivery man, but the Russian police are not known for wasting their time on cosplay.
The event became a national reality show. The media broadcast live:
"Attention, attention! Carpilo seen running through Moscow with a suitcase full of buggy Alexandre Pargaz 12 codes!"
"Exclusive: He tried to hide inside a Cruel Territories store, but was recognized and thrown out to boos."
"Final escape attempt: Carpilo seen digging a tunnel! Unfortunately, he forgot that Moscow in winter has a harder ground than his programming code."
The Legacy of the Game Wars 2: Lessons That Will Never Be Learned
✅ Cruel Territories is consecrated as the new owner of the market—until the next scandal involving $1 million loot boxes.
✅ Lekox 2.0 is technically bankrupt, but should be reborn under a different name, like every company that has gone bankrupt in humiliating fashion.
✅ Carpilo becomes a Russian urban legend. They say that at night, if you listen closely, you can hear him whispering "It wasn't a bug, it was a feature..."
✅ Russia decides that maybe investing trillions in a game studio wasn't the most brilliant idea in the world.
And so ends the greatest rivalry in gaming history. Or at least until Carpilo escapes, opens a new studio in Siberia and releases "Alexandre Pargaz 13: The Outlaw's Redemption."