"Two for the price of one! Weekend special!"

I, Kazuki Tanaka, was living my best life as an assistant at a small convenience store in Midori Town. Okay, maybe not my best life, but it was peaceful. Stocking shelves, smiling at customers, and saying the same lines over and over—pure bliss.

No dragons flying around, no magical battles in the streets. Just the comforting hum of the cash register and the occasional spill in aisle three.

Until she walked in.

She wasn't just a customer. Oh no. She was tall—like, skyscraper tall—and had horns so shiny they could double as luxury car accessories. Her long black hair flowed behind her like a shampoo commercial, and her crimson eyes locked onto me with an intensity that could scare the price tags off the shelves.

"Are you the Great Hero?" she asked, her voice echoing like thunder in the middle of my quiet little store.

The other customers froze. So did I. My first thought? "What the heck is a Great Hero?"

"Uh, excuse me?" I stammered, gripping my mop like a lifeline.

She ignored my confusion, dropped to one knee, and pulled out a small box covered in glowing runes.

"I am Lilith, Princess of the Demon Realm, and I seek to establish peace between our worlds. To do so, I propose marriage to the Hero who defeated my father. You."

Silence. Dead silence.

I laughed nervously. "Ah… I think you've got the wrong guy. I'm just a store clerk."

She tilted her head, confused. "But you're holding the Hero's sword."

I looked down. My "sword" was a mop. A cheap, slightly bent mop.

"Uh, this isn't a sword," I explained, holding it up for emphasis. "It's a mop. You know, for cleaning floors?"

Her eyes sparkled with admiration. "Your humility knows no bounds, Great Hero."

Before I could argue further, she slid a ring onto my finger. It pulsed with an eerie red glow, and a magical contract materialized in the air, complete with runes and sparkles.

"The treaty is sealed!" she declared triumphantly.

And just like that, I was engaged to a demon princess.

Enter the Real Hero

Just when I thought things couldn't get any weirder, the store doors flew open, and a guy in shiny armor stormed in. His sword actually looked legendary, unlike my poor mop.

"There you are!" he yelled, pointing at Lilith. "Princess Lilith, that man is an impostor! I'm the Great Hero who defeated your father!"

Finally, someone was here to clear up this mess.

I looked at Lilith, expecting her to call off the engagement. Instead, she crossed her arms and glared at the armored guy.

"Don't be ridiculous. This man"—she gestured dramatically at me—"has far more heroic presence than you. And look how skillfully he wields his weapon!"

I glanced at my mop. Seriously?

The so-called real hero looked like he was about to explode. "That's a mop! He's just a store clerk!"

Lilith smirked. "A hero who works undercover to understand human life? How noble."

I wanted to scream. This was turning into a comedy sketch, and I was the unwilling star.

And Then It Got Worse

Lilith wasn't backing down. The guy in armor—his name was Ryuu—tried everything to convince her, but she shut him down every time. Meanwhile, I was too busy panicking to say much.

Eventually, Lilith decided it was time to leave. She grabbed me (literally picked me up like I was a shopping bag) and dragged me out of the store.

"Wait! What about my shift?" I protested.

"Your heroic duties take priority," she said firmly.

And that's how I found myself in a luxury demon carriage, headed to a place I didn't even believe existed an hour ago. Ryuu ran alongside the carriage, yelling something about undoing the engagement, but Lilith ignored him.

"Relax, Kazuki," she said, smiling at me like this was a normal Tuesday. "You're my responsibility now. I'll make sure you're well taken care of."

"Gee, that's comforting," I muttered, clutching my mop like it was the only normal thing left in my life.

End of Chapter 1

And that's how my peaceful, ordinary life as a convenience store clerk came to an end. Now I'm engaged to a demon princess, stuck in a magical contract, and heading straight into the unknown.

My mop and I? We're not ready for this.