Word of my "heroic feats" was spreading like wildfire—emphasis on fire, since most of my victories involved me narrowly avoiding being set on fire. And now, thanks to my mop absorbing the rogue artifact's energy, everyone in the demon castle was convinced I was some kind of chosen warrior.
I, Kazuki Tanaka, grocery store assistant-turned-accidental fiancé of the Demon Princess, had become a living legend.
The Parade Nobody Asked For
The day started with Lilith barging into my room again, holding a fancy outfit that looked like someone had sewn together the remains of a disco ball and a medieval suit of armor.
"What… is that?" I asked, squinting at the sparkly monstrosity.
"Your ceremonial attire for the Hero's Parade!" she announced cheerfully.
"Parade? What parade?"
Lilith tilted her head like it was obvious. "The parade to celebrate your heroic deeds, of course!"
"Heroic? All I did was jab a mop at an angry lightbulb!"
She ignored my protests and shoved the outfit into my hands. "Hurry up. The entire kingdom is waiting."
A Mop-tacular Entrance
The streets of the demon city were packed with citizens of all shapes and sizes—imps, ogres, succubi, and even a few demons that looked suspiciously like overgrown house cats. Banners with my (terribly inaccurate) portrait hung everywhere.
The parade itself was a spectacle. There were marching bands playing ominous yet upbeat tunes, acrobats juggling flaming torches, and floats shaped like mythical beasts.
And then there was my float.
It was a giant replica of my mop, complete with glittering bristles and magical sparkles shooting out of the handle.
I buried my face in my hands as the crowd cheered.
"Why is my mop the star of the show?!" I hissed at Lilith, who was sitting beside me on the float.
"Because it's your legendary weapon!" she said, as if it were obvious.
Ryuu's Sneaky Entrance
Meanwhile, Ryuu had finally made it to the demon city. Disguised in a hooded cloak, he pushed through the crowd, glaring at the parade floats.
"This is ridiculous," he muttered. "They're celebrating a guy with a mop!"
He scanned the floats until he spotted me waving awkwardly at the crowd.
"There you are," he said, smirking. "Time to crash this party."
Kazuki vs. Ryuu: The Showdown
As the parade neared its end, Ryuu leaped onto my float, sword in hand. The crowd gasped, and the band screeched to a halt.
"Kazuki Tanaka!" Ryuu bellowed. "Your time pretending to be the hero is over!"
I froze, my mop halfway through an awkward wave.
"Ryuu, what are you doing?!" I whispered.
"I'm here to expose you!" he declared, pointing his sword dramatically.
Lilith stood up, her eyes narrowing. "How dare you interrupt the Hero's Parade!"
Ryuu scoffed. "He's not a hero! He's just a store clerk with a glorified broom!"
Lilith glared at him. "He's more heroic than you'll ever be!"
The crowd erupted into murmurs, clearly enjoying the drama.
An Unlikely Duel
Before I could protest, Ryuu lunged at me.
"Fight me!" he shouted.
"Why?!" I yelped, blocking his sword with my mop.
The crowd roared with excitement, thinking this was all part of the parade.
Ryuu swung his sword again, but I clumsily deflected it, accidentally knocking him off balance. He stumbled backward, tripped over a decorative barrel, and fell off the float into a cart of demon cabbages.
The crowd went wild.
"Hero Kazuki wins again!" someone shouted.
Lilith smiled smugly. "That'll teach him to challenge my fiancé."
I looked down at Ryuu, who was glaring at me from the cabbage pile. "Can we please stop fighting?" I begged.
Ryuu's Redemption Plan
Later that evening, Ryuu cornered me in the castle garden.
"Why are you going along with this?" he demanded.
"Do you think I have a choice?" I shot back. "They'll destroy my store if I back out!"
Ryuu sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "This is insane. But… maybe we can work together."
I blinked. "Work together? You mean, like a team?"
"Not exactly," he said. "I'll help you survive this ridiculous charade, but only so I can find a way to prove I'm the real hero."
I hesitated, then nodded. "Deal."