He didn't want her to go through another shock in such an small time. He could feel that she doesn't feel things as strongly as he does.
He was so attracted to her that he felt like marking her right then and there but the same thing couldn't be said for her.
Humans being mated with a werewolf ain't something new. A lot of wolves have human mates.
But their relationship always seemed to confuse him. He has seen the wolf always chasing the human until the human finally feels the mate bond. Humans feel attracted to the wolf but they don't instantly fall for them while the wolf fall hard enough to marry them at first glance.
He knew that his and Amara's case was no different. She might be attracted to him due to the mate bond but she definitely isn't ready to fall deep into this with him and he wanted to give her time.
He was ready to wait for her as long as she needed him to. But one thing was clear and that is he's never leaving her.
He wasn't new in this entire thing. While he has seen lots of wolves going crazy over their mate, at the same time he has seen wolves who would choose someone else over their mates.
They would reject their mates, giving them so much pain that they feel like dying.
And some even committed suicide, unable to take the pain of rejection.
He used to be so mad at those wolves for rejecting their precious mates who were gifts from the moon goddess.
But at the same time, he couldn't help but blame the moon goddess for tieing their souls with someone who was going to fall for someone else.
He has also seen the ending of both of them. After their mates commit suicide, they start to feel the pain.
They start to feel like they are going to die. Only then they realize how harsh it was of them to reject their mates despite knowing that it was going to hurt them like this.
And all of a sudden, they would fall for their mate who is already dead and would mourn like they were madly in love with them.
This entire thing was out of Nicolas's understanding. Falling in love with someone wasn't a crime. Everyone was free to fall in love with whoever they want to but this entire mate thing ruined so many lives.
Sometimes he used to think that humans were better in this. They fall for someone they actually fall in love with and not someone they should fall in love with because the moon goddess paired them together.
Obviously the humans have God but the way they fall in love with their other haIf is just too beautiful.
But then again, moral of the story is not everyone is lucky in love.
He was praying to be lucky in love. He didn't want Amara to fall for someone else.
He won't be able to bear that much pain. That would be more than the pain of rejection.
"Why aren't you answering my question? Where are you lost? Are you even hearing me?" Amara bought him out of his chain of thoughts by shaking his body.
"Huh?" He looked at her with a dumbfounded look.
He mentally started cursing himself for zoning out. It was so unlikely of him. He is always present but then again, a lot of unusual things were happening today.
He so wanted to write down today's date and print it on the wall so that he never forgets it.
He mentally made a note to see today's date and set that as his wallpaper to mark it as an important one.
The rest, he would remember. He was confident about it.
"What were you saying?" He asked her after clearing his throat.
"Don't zone out, Nicolas. She is going to think that you aren't interested in hearing what she has to say," he mentally warned himself.
"I asked if I am a princess then?"she looked at him with hopeful eyes.
Neither of them knew what she was hoping the answer to be.
"You can be a aware queen if you learn how to stand for your rights. The journey from a princess to a queen isn't much away. Every princess becomes a queen someday," he said with a smile.
He didn't know what was the most appropriate answer to her question but he didn't need to be right.
He just wanted to open his heart to her and share whatever was going inside of his heart.
"Would you help me in this journey then?" Amara asked, this time looking straight into his eyes.
"I thought that you were going to take a few more days to speak up with confidence," Nicolas said with a chuckle.
"I guess I am a fast learner and you have gotten pretty good motivating skills. I feel motivated enough now," Amara said, now it was her turn to scratch the back of her neck.
"Obviously I will help you in this journey. In fact, not only this, I will help you on every journey of your life but there's this thing, darling, I can only help you maintain your motivation or even push you towards your goals but you are going to have to set the goals for yourself," he said looking directly into her eyes.
"You need to set goals that are challenging enough for you but we can always start with the easier ones. So what's your first goal?"
"I have already set my first goal. I am ready to meet the pack members and I have also made my second decision. I want to be a part of your pack, if that's ok with you and your pack members, of course," Amara was confident at the starting but her voice got a little low around the end.
"Rise your head, make your voice louder and command me with confidence, my queen. I will follow and fulfill all of your orders," Nicolas said.
His words instantly bought Amara confidence. She loved how he was supporting her rather than questioning her or saying things.
He was nothing like the rumors and maybe that's why they were rumors.
"I want to be a part of your pack, if that's ok with you and your pack members," Amara repeated her words but with more confidence this time.
"Aren't they the same words you just said?" Nicolas asked but Amara could see the small smile that was dancing around the edges of his lips.
"They are but as said, a queen needs to be confident, kind , and humble. You forgot the word humble. I can't get into someone else's property without taking their permission. A true queen knows how to respect others as well," Amara said and Nicolas gave her a proud smile.
"I honestly thought that we were going to start from the beginner level but turns out, you are already on the intermediate level. Not bad, I am actually impressed. Should I call the pack members for dinner then? I will officially take you in as a part of me, ahem, I mean as a part of our pack," Nicolas said.
He felt like beating the hell out of himself for being this dumb. He was almost about to blow away his covers. If his tongue decides to slip again then he was afraid that he might end up saying that she's his soulmate.
For her mental health, he needs to have control over his thoughts and words.
He doesn't know for how long he was going to let this thing go unsaid but one thing was sure and it was, she was going to be his at the end.
He didn't mind being called crazy, obsessed, psycho or whatever the society was going to call him as long as she was around him.
He was afraid of their future. He wasn't expecting his thoughts to go dark this quick but it just did.
"Sure."
For a few seconds, neither of them said anything. They both were staring outside, not finding anything to talk about.
They had so many things to know about each other yet at the same time,they couldn't find a topic to start talking about.
Both of them wanted to talk as the silence was becoming a little awkward.
"Do you want to watch a movie to calm yourself down?" Nicolas finally opened his mouth after brainstorming for around five to six minutes.
Amara immediately nodded her head, as if waiting for him to offer her anything, just anything to get rid of this awkwardness.
"Which genre do you prefer?" Nicolas asked after turning on the TV.
"I am honestly ok with everything. As long as the movie is interesting and got subtitles, I don't mind which genre or language it is," Amara said with a bitter smile.
She was never asked this question before. Nobody really bothered getting her opinion on anything. Throughout all of her life, she was pushed down by other's opinions,moods, and wishes.
In the pack house, everyone would watch a movie together during every weekend. The omegas were also allowed there but there were rules as well.
If the movie is too scary and a jump scare comes and any omega ends up giving a reaction then they were set to get punishment.
They weren't allowed to laugh either. Moral of the story is they were invited there to be the drama instead of watching the drama.
Everyone would wait for them to give a reaction to bully them. It was such an pathetic situation.
After getting bullied for so many months, Amara finally learned how not to show emotions on her face.
These things now makes her want to cry. She has been through lots of things. Not only her, the other omegas were treated the same.
At today's date and age, it was hard to find someone without their own phone or internet.
But the omegas are present for others to see.
Amara's father was quite rich himself. He had an far more stable job, he made good money, enough to buy his only daughter a few phones rather than only one but he never did so.
He followed whatever the other pack members said with closed eyes and ignored his own daughter's needs and wishes.
His urge to fit in the society was far more important than his own daughter, the same daughter he donated sperms for.
Amara couldn't point out whether she was the misfortunate one or her father.
She had a father who didn't love her and her father had a daughter he couldn't love.
Both seemed miserable. One couldn't love and the other one wasn't loved.
It wasn't a love story, it was a tragedy between a father and daughter duo.
Sometimes Amara thinks that maybe, just maybe if her mother was alive by now, she could have a better parent, a better life.
But at the same time, she thinks her father could never truly accept her because her mother died while giving birth to her.
Maybe he thought that she was a bad luck bearer who killed his love right after coming to this world.
Maybe she was nothing but a monster to him, she would never be able to get the answers from him.
For he was no longer in this world.
This realization was sad enough.
"Why do you have that bitter smile on your face?" Nicolas's voice broke her chain of thoughts.
Previously, Nicolas was the one zoning out and now it was her turn.
"Nothing, just thinking about how I along with the other omegas weren't allowed to choose a movie. We always had to watch whatever the others selected and instead of watching the drama, we would become the drama. It's really pathetic and I do feel pathetic while sharing this with you."
"You were a victim and the same goes for the other omegas. Victims aren't pathetic, abusers are."