--_HARUKI_--
The sky's clear, the sun's looking down above and I'm already sweating. What bad weather.. I hate sunny days, I hate ugly faces, I hate...
"Oh." I uttered as I finally saw him, Kaede with a dark expression towards me. I smiled at him like I always did. I like the rain, I like money, I like Kaede.. I think I did so.
Kaede's here in front of me right now with, an emotionless face yet I can still feel his anger. A gloomy aura wraps around him. Talking with Hibiki is a pain. I hate Hibiki, he messed up my mind once again. I have already convinced myself that I didn't love Kaede, that I only used him. Those happy times were over and I already knew from the start that those would just end up to be fleeting memories.
I was too scared to commit, too scared for the future, too scared to love. But I know that in the end, it's entirely my fault that it ended like this. I can't possibly go back now.
"You've finally come back to me." I cockily said. I hate my personality.
He took some steps back, probably conflicted with how I acted. "What do you want."
I hate this weather. I walked towards the shade past Kaede which made him turn to look at me. I could feel his gaze, full of anger towards me even though I didn't try to look back. You caused this Haruki.
I sat down and lit a cigarette. "How do I say this.."
"Say what?" He said as I felt that he stood once more a few meters away, in front of me.
I slowly looked up to look at him. His short hair that was blown once by the wind made me remember the past, when I was still so close to him. His ever beautiful figure casts a shadow on his side. His eyes, looking intently at me, not daring to break contact. "It's my fault. I'm sorry."
Silence took over for a while. Kaede still didn't break his eyes off of me, while I looked at the ground in disgrace. I felt his sharp look soften.
"I'm not here to reconcile things. I'm here to apologize," I said as I took the courage to look up once more and look at him. His face is still expressionless but the gaze that seemed like he really wanna kill me a while ago, now softened. "I'm sorry, for what I did. It's my fault, I know it's my fault and I'm sorry." I stood up and started walking towards him.
"I loved you Kaede," I stopped in front of him, while I looked at his eyes that seemed to glow for a second. Is this really the first time I was able to say I love him back? The night we'd say our final goodbyes? "I loved you but I'm not for you. I don't deserve you, I never did."
His face still looked numb like that last time I saw him, but now it's the first time I'm seeing him on the verge of tears. I quickly hugged him before I could see his tears. "Push me away if you want."
Expecting a push, I hugged him tightly.. but there wasn't. I just felt his cold tears fall into my shoulder, his hiccups as he cried are the only things I can hear.
"Why.." I finally heard Kaede utter a word. I then felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist to my back. A deep, warm embrace which I didn't expect I'd experience again. "Why just now? That was all that I wanted you to say!"
It's the first time I have ever heard him raise his voice to me, and I don't hate it. I loved everything about him. I loved him before and.. yes I still do but I'm not for him.
"I love you too.. why?" He mumbled again and again, while softly punching my back. I let him do as he pleased and I only responded in hugging him back.
Hours passed by but we just sat there under the shade. Me sitting up while he sat close beside me with his head leaning on my shoulder. This man is bigger than me yet he acts like a baby.. how cute.
"I really loved you, I still do," Kaede removed his head from my shoulder. "But I'm not good for you. You understand right?"
He stood up and just looked away from afar. The city lights can be seen from this place, the moon, already starting its shift.
"I know." He turned his head to look at me with a.. smile on his face. I never thought that he could smile like that again. That he could smile like that to me again after what happened. He softly caressed my face, touching my cheeks, my lips as he turned his head to leave. "I'm just happy you loved me too."
That was the sentence that I remembered from him. The way his voice conveyed those words so gently, so soft like he was talking to his lover. I wasn't able to help myself but look at him as he left me behind. I thought that in the end, I would be the one leaving him. Turns out that he'd be the one leaving, I get that though.
The important thing is that I can try to move on now. Now that he knows the feelings I've hidden so hard. He loves me and I love him, that's what's important.
Tomorrow, I will finally be able to leave this city. To start a new life.
Goodbye, love..
⁰-⁰
-KAEDE-
Tears formed in my eyes, rolling down my cheeks only to fall into the dry ground of the walkway. The pain of my ex-lover, one who I never thought reciprocated my feelings telling me they loved me.. was a feeling I have never felt before.
These aren't sad tears, it's happy tears. Or so I hope so. I can't understand myself right now.
We would probably never meet again. When I looked into his eyes, I felt that he was already moving on. While I probably won't be able to recover for years. I've been in a lot of relationships but he was the only one I truly loved. It hurts, yet again love hurts.
I walked into a convenience store, bought instant ramen, and some drinks. I sat down on a chair with a table near the store's entrance to eat. A few seconds passed when I finally sat down, a beautiful woman with long brown hair suddenly popped up beside me.
"Can I sit here?" She asked with a smile as she pointed at the chair I'm sitting at. I moved a little to give her some space, moving my food too. As normally, I mixed the ingredients and poured hot water in.
"Are you okay?" The woman beside me asked, but I didn't pay attention to her. I'm too tired to talk, I just want to eat and go home. "What's your name?" She continued on asking but I didn't reply and just continued on eating.
"You're very handsome. You shouldn't cry.." I turned to look at her and looked at her angrily yet she only laughed in reply.. weird. "You know, I have this one student that kinda feels like you."
"What do you mean?" I finally replied to her as I finished up the ramen cup. I felt like not talking to her after her engagements are a little rude.
"He might seem like the opposite of you but both of you reminds me a lot of my son," She looks so young that no one would even expect that she'd have children.. "Oh thinking about it, he also wears that exact earring, the color, the design.. yes that's exactly it. The other ear though."
Huh? This is handmade so there is only one pair in the entire world.
"Excuse me but.. would this person's name be Hibiki?" I softly asked after I finished a sip of my juice. The lady looked shocked but her face reverted back to it's calm look.
"I'm Celene Puel Luelia. Little snows friends would be my friend too." She said with a smile while reaching out her hand for a shake. I accepted it and smiled at her. How formal..
"Well.. Ms. Luelia, what do you mean student?" I asked in curiosity.
She took a big bite of her corn dog then quickly drank down water. Taking deep breaths she said, "I guess you could call me his mentor. I teach all kinds of things about figure skating. That child's very talented I can see it.. well now about you, what do you think of joining?"
The thought of Hibiki skating in the middle of the cold, icy rink as his stage never even occurred to me. Yet that vision I had of him, skating, dancing felt so natural. Like it was made for him. "My name's Kaede and I'm not planning to join but.. can I check it out?"
While it is true that I haven't seen him for a while, I just really wanna see him skate.
"Oh, sure? Sure! Come here." She said with a very warm smile as she gave me a card. A business card?
⁰-⁰
"Morning, Little snow.. I think he knows you?" Ms. Celene and I just arrived in front of the place. She stood between us in front of the door with a key in hand while.. Hibiki's in front of me. Not even shocked.. just stunned without anything in his face and looking straight at me.
"What are you doing here?" He asks. Looks like it's been a while since he's started skating because he looks like he's already close with other people like.. this girl's that's making bunny ears for him up his head with her fingers.. wait was that girl the one who confessed.. nevermind.
"Forget that, is that mine?" I asked back, pointing at what he's wearing right now. I poked his chest a little. "Yes, it's definitely mine. Why are you wearing that? They can see your body.."
Ah.. this one's probably the thing I lost a long time ago. "Is there a problem?" He asks, tilting his haid as he did so, acting confused.
"I can't get mad at you can I?" He only looked even more confused but I just followed Ms. Celene inside. I turned my back to see Hibiki and the girl behind her just looking at me. "C'mon now, I just wanna see you dance." I said with a smile.
The girl behind her pushed her forward, making him finally move towards me.
I sat down on one of the chairs on the sidelines, I asked the girl a good spot and she shyly pointed out where. I guess it would be awkward because of what happened before. I looked down at Hibiki sitting on a chair near the rink's entrance, putting on his figure skates as he looked straight down. He looks nervous.. why?
The three of them, Ms. Celene, Hibiki and the girl finally entered the rink and moved towards the middle. Hibiki held the girls hand as they did so.
Clap
With a start of a clap, both of them focused on Ms. Celene. "From today onwards, you won't be using any props," Her voice could be heard towards the whole place since it's almost empty. "The props we used are actually just so you could feel like you're realistically fighting. First time actually doing it together at the same time right?" She laughed a little.
"Well~ we gotta impress our visitor you know." They looked at me for a second but focused back on what Ms. Celene's saying, she got both of their utmost respect. She then quickly left the rink, right after whispering something to Hibiki.
Hibiki's right there on stage with a partner but Hibiki's drawing all my attention. My eyes, focused on him just as how he looks focused right now. His beautiful, soft elegant figure looked perfect upon that icy rink. His lips seemed to have moved to say some words before it started.
"With a flick of a finger.."
Flick