"You were fated to meet but you're not for each other," Ms. Yamamoto said with no hesitation. Even though she sounds calm and composed, I can feel the anger in her voice. "Think of it this way. And why would you want to be with this, good for nothing puppet?"
Her words would definitely hurt, if I can feel.
"You have never let me have anything I want my whole life. Damn, you even left me this huge ass deb-"
"That's a different topic," His mom interrupted.
I still remember it clearly, the day we met his parents. He didn't really have a choice since he cared for his parents even after all they did. His dad just stood there, at his mom's back. Looking down but I can sense sadness in his eyes. We know he deeply opposes his wife's decisions but he just can't do anything.
I stood there like a statue, standing in front of his parents while beside Haru, emotionless. Staring straight at his mom's eyes, both of us aren't breaking any contact.
I shook off the memories that resurfaced as I finished folding the last shirt that Xyla gave me. Because of her, my wardrobe that once only has a jacket and a few is now full.
I laid down my bed and looked at the white cat beside me, she's sleeping peacefully. I just realized that I haven't given her a name yet.
Kaede.. Kade then.
I closed my eyes and tried to think of nothing. But the thought that I might be the reason that Haru's life is ruined and resulted in his death, still haunts me. I sighed.
I stood up and walked towards the big mirror I have beside my wardrobe. I can see myself but I can't understand myself right now.
Long white hair, longer surpassing my shoulders. Light blue eyes, but looking duller every second, it's lifeless. And a mole on my neck. I do look dull. Ms. Yamamoto's right too, I really am a good for nothing.
Ever since mom left, well that's what the doctors said, only Kaede was there for me. She only left me a big sum of money, good enough to support me to graduate and until college. If my mom left me, then I must have been a disappointment. My dad's nowhere to be found too so what do I know?
I really am a good for nothing.
An accident did happen to me, I don't know what caused it to happen though. I don't really remember anything from my past, only Kaede stayed in my mind since he was there with me at the hospital all the time.
He stayed unlike my parents.
I don't remember anything at all. What am I like before that accident? Was I cheerful? Can I feel? Only Kaede knows about it but It's a sensitive topic even for him, he said that it's better to forget.
But the only thing I know right is that I really am a puppet. I do people's orders not even thinking about it and I let people do almost anything to me, if I know them.
What makes me good enough to have Kaede be my best friend? What makes me interesting enough to have Haru as my boyfriend?
Perhaps I'm just fun to be toyed with, or perhaps they just see something on me that I don't?
I looked away from the mirror, I've been staring at my face for too long while thinking and before I knew it. The face that I knew as Hibiki became disfigured.
I opened the wardrobe and took a set of clothes assigned by Xyla herself.
The shirt's a little tight, the front is almost entirely clear, exposing my body. Not really my type of clothing but it doesn't bother me. Paired with ripped, baggy pants.
I wore an extra piece of clothing since it's cold outside and I'd literally look naked with this shirt. A black leather jacket, much thinner than what I gave Kaede but good enough to make me warm.
I stood in front of the mirror again and opened my eyes. I look like a cunt.
...
Not necessarily a good thing, but not a bad thing either.
⁰-⁰
I stepped outside and called a taxi. I want to forget about these thoughts, it's probably depressing thoughts but I can't feel so it doesn't affect me. Either way, I just want a reason to get out and forget.
First stop, I visited a cat cafe. I ordered plain black coffee like I usually do and approached some cats while waiting. I feel like I'm betraying Kade by going here but I left her some milk and cat food so I'm safe.
"Ma'am, your coffee," A young girl's voice called for me while serving coffee at my table.
"Thank you," I politely thanked her with a soft smile.
"Oh ah, sorry s-sir," She panickly said while taking out something from her pocket. "Um it might not be the best time for this but can I get your number?"
"Sure."
I sat down at my seat and took a sip of my coffee. It's strong. I tucked my hair behind my right ear, as it keeps getting on my drink. I touched my ear and realized something was missing.
"The earring?" I asked myself as I checked my pockets.
Meow
With a meow of a cat, I finally remembered that I have the left earring and Kaede has the other. Cats have been helping me frequently huh?
I finally finished my cup of coffee. I said goodbye to the cats and left the cafe, giving the young girl that's waving at me a smile as I left. I can only give her a smile as a farewell since I think it'd be the last time we'd see each other.
I'm planning on going to an arcade that both Kaede and Haru go to sometimes. They compete with each other a lot but when it comes to games, they become the bestest friends. That's cute.
The arcade is nearby, just a 30 minute walk from this cafe. As I walk on the sidewalks, I notice people chatting with their friends. People dressed in school girl uniforms even when there's no school, people singing at a public karaoke and Gyaru's and Lolita's crossing the streets. They're really pretty.
I don't go out much since I don't have a reason to, I only go out when I need to go grocery shopping, buying clothes from Xyla and getting called out by Kaede.
But going out alone isn't really that bad, I think it's.. Fun? I think that's the right word.
It's really cold, and the winds kept blowing harder. I think it might rain soon.
I hurried under a shade where people are waiting for taxis. I only sat at the bench since I'm not in a rush to go anywhere soon.
As I sat here, waiting for something to happen, I noticed a flyer, it has strong colors of black, blue and white which caught my attention. It's plastered on the board, up behind the benches.
It's something about a competition. Figure Skating. There's a beautiful boy, the face of the flyer, dancing alone on a big ice rink, and the focus of the picture is him.
He's stunning, a center of attention. The person to be looked at, upon the rink that is being showered by the spotlight.
I like it.
Beside the flyer is another flyer, it looks a little messed up but it's also about figure skating, but it's about a sweet looking lady looking for Mentee's. She has long brown hair, a slender body and a beautiful face. She's perfect for figure skating, it's weird that out of any other places, she would choose to teach here though.
Of course if I wanna go up the big stage, I need to learn how to even skate normally. That way even people, even Kaede would look at me, and see me.
I took a picture of both the flyers and stood up. I called the number only to be greeted by an automated voice asking if I wanted coffee or classes? Huh?
I said classes and the call ended. The number, texting me the location where I need to go. Weird.
I checked the message it sent again and realized it's nearby, just an hour away from the bench I am at right now. I will be passing by the arcade on the way so might as well visit.
I started walking but then it started raining. I didn't bring an umbrella with me so I quickly ran towards a shade, it's a restaurant.
It looks expensive but I entered anyway. I opened the doors and as I entered, I felt someone staring at me from my left. I looked at their way and realized who it is.
It's Kaede sitting at a table, while there's a girl sitting across from him. He looked shocked, wide eyed when he saw me.
So I just replied to him with a smile and a wave to let him know it's me. I'm sure he realized it when I entered because of the matching earrings we're wearing though.
I sat down at a seat on the far right corner beside the windows, just planning to order a lasagna and wait until the rain has calmed down.
Kaede's here but he seemed busy, it's probably a date so I won't be bothering him.
After a while my order finally arrived and I ate it all in just a minute. It tastes good, this makes me remember when Kaede made me lasagna in cooking class. It tasted salty but he made it so I finished it without letting him taste it.
The rain finally stopped so I left the payment and a tip under an empty clear glass. I stood up, planning to leave when somebody called my name.
"Hiki!" Kaede called. I already know it's him since I know how his voice sounds from high to low. I looked back and he's just standing there, still looking shocked. "S-so it's really you, well um you look.." He said, as if it's the first time he saw me.
"Is something wrong?" I asked, tilting my head.
"No, nothing. You just look.. different today. Cover your belly please.." He said while looking away.
"It's fine really, I don't feel uncomfortable. Come on look at me," He slowly looked at me again. "Xyla gave me clothes for free. I didn't introduce both of you properly, my bad."
We walked out of the restaurant and started heading towards the arcade like I planned.
"Her name's Xyla Kaye Lavandine, a former owner of a thrift shop, she might look like she's always mourning but she's not. Also, you can expect all the outfits I wear from now on to come from her," I introduced her as we walked on the sidewalk. Kaede wrapping his right arm around my left arm as we walk.
"She's an interesting individual. That day.." He stopped talking and looked at me.
"It's fine, I don't feel bothered about it," I comforted him.
"Well, that day. I can't deny to think that she's a little sketchy since she knows about the yakuza's and stuff. She even told us to call her if we wanna do something, if it's about them."
"Don't worry, we can trust her. She might look like a dangerous person, well she is, but she's really kind. Also, don't be shocked if she pulls out a gun."
"Wait what do you mea-" I purposely interrupted him, dragging him quickly inside the arcade. "Oh, I didn't even realize that we're going here."
"Accompany me, will you?" I asked as I took out my wallet.
"Sure, I don't have anything to do."
"I'm going somewhere after this though, you don't have to come with me," I stopped and thought that it would be better if I surprise him when I enter a competition someday. "Actually no, don't come."
He kept pestering me about it while we were buying tokens but he eventually shrugged it off.
Before we knew it, we'd already played for hours and hours and the sun was already setting. I told him that he should go home now since it's getting dark but now he wants to accompany me even more because "It's dangerous," he said. I don't think he knows that I know self defense.
"Kaede look," I pointed at a cat that passed by. "Oh hello," He greeted.
I left him there and hid somewhere so he wouldn't be able to follow. It's the first time I'm leaving Kaede for something else.
I stopped at a lit up two story building behind the busy streets. I entered it and the woman from the flyer laying down the floor greeted me as I entered.
It looks like a normal cafe here, nothing special. She turned her head to look at me, her face shocked, excitement soon took over her.
"Ah!" She uttered as she struggled to stand up. I hurried over and helped her stand up. Her long brown hair that I saw from the flyer is now tied up in a bun.
"Oh, this is embarrassing. I'm supposed to be professional," She said as she pressed her hands to her cheeks. "Are you here looking for a mentor?" She excitedly asked. "Or are you just gonna order a coffee?" Her voice turned sad.
"Yes, plain black coffee and mentor," I answered.
She walked circles around me and looked at me up and down. She stopped in front of me and smiled.
"You're pale, you have white hair, you're pretty." She looked down at my chest. "And you do have the figure.." She pondered, putting her hands on her chin and eyes closed. "It's not really known here, but with you. I can see it," She said with a smile.
I just nodded.
"If you join us, you'll be my second student. I'm new as a Mentor, you see," She said as she took a list and a pen from a chair.
"Wouldn't I struggle a little since I don't have experience?" I asked.
"You don't? Well don't worry about that, I'm gonna be your teacher so you'd be fine," She smiled at me softly and asked my name. "Hibiki Onagawa," I answered.
"Welcome then," She squealed in excitement. "I'll teach you everything you need to know!"