Kamari Ese Avena
Time is a determining factor of a lot of things, or rather, of everything that exists. And just as much as time is essential, it could be more of an anathema than a blessing. Photography gives me the feeling of control over it, even for a split second.
"You are different," Seven remarks. He says it like he is just coming to terms with it.
"It is offensive that you assume I am anything like her," I reply, standing up from the side and facing him finally. I did not notice until now, but Seven Yusei is tall, I am not good with heights so I have no idea how tall he is, but then again my head would probably not get to his shoulder. That's how far up he is.
"Is it, now? Given there was no introduction on our first meeting."
"I made an introduction, you did not. You rudely walked away after I let you know my name," I point out.
"Fair point. Why are you out here?" Seven shifts his gaze to the pool where I had my leg sunk in just minutes ago and then back to me. Straight face, still robotic.
"Inside was too loud," I say. "Is that not why you think Elle and I are different? Because she would have preferred to play weird games while downing alcohol and not sit outside like a loner, yeah?"
"She sure loved to party, yes," he says, walking now to the pool and sitting by the side just like I did.
"How well did you know her?"
Seven says nothing in reply to my question, minutes pass and I figure he did not want to answer me and is now back to his cold self until he speaks again, confessing; "I knew her, like the back of my hand."
I try to say something at his confession, my lips open, but no words came out. Elle never told me about him, but here he is speaking like he knew her for ages. I risk a glance at him, and I startle back when I see the first hint of emotion in his eyes that stares into the pool — pain.
"She never told me about you," I eventually spit some words out, careful not to sound too judging.
"She probably never told anyone about me," he corrects. "After all, we were never friends." It is not sadness that accompanies his statement, you would assume with the way he speaks of her, there would be a hint of sadness in his voice but what I hear is more than sadness. It is bitterness — raw and unyielding. It makes me uneasy and yet curious to know more about him and Elle.
"Come, sit."
"You are asking me to come and sit beside you? Why are you not inside with your friends by the way?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
"Same reason why you are outside, I guess." He shrugs, "Not everyone likes the ways of life that seem to have been standardised for youths of our generation."
"Right."
"For example," he continues much to my shock, "I would much rather spend the night curled up on a couch and reading, than partying with people who can forget about me in a heartbeat."
I am stunned, yet mesmerized, seeing Seven Yusei in a different light, and wondering how he seems different from anyone I have ever met. Slowly, I make my way back to the poolside and sit, just a few feet away from Seven.
"I read too," I tell him.
"What kind of books do you read?" He inquires.
"Fiction. Fantasy precisely, I like a good escape from realities."
"So you will much rather read about flying unicorns than read about how to survive on this soil?"
"I do not read about flying unicorns!" I protest, laughing. I catch myself in that instant, clamping my mouth shut. I do not remember the last time I laughed, but this boy who at first disliked me has just made me laugh in just a few minutes I have spent with him.
If Seven noticed my instant change, he says nothing about it. "I read fiction too, fantasy just like you, only mine is just not about flying unicorns." This time he is the one who laughs, and I find myself peeking at him. He sounds different, more carefree and certainly not like the Seven I met yesterday, or today in class.
"See you trying to get to know me, when just hours ago you said it is the last thing you would do," I tease.
He laughs again, "We are outside RAAS. So my guards are dropped," he whispers, and if I was not good with listening, I would not have heard that. I decide not to push it, instead, I rewind to our conversation about books.
"So, would you say you are old at heart?" I ask, forcing myself to look away and not get lost in the beautiful crinkling at the corner of his eyes when his lips spread into a smile.
"If reading the likes of Harry Potter and the Kane chronicles would make me old at heart, then so be it."
"You read the Kane chronicles?" I ask, amused and very much impressed.
"And every of Rick Riordan's books I could lay my hands on," he responds.
"And which of his series was your favourite?"
"That's a very hard question, but I'll go with Percy Jackson."
"Everyone goes with Percy Jackson," I tease.
"He is a legend. Who would pass on a chance to be a god for a girl he loves? That's enough to make me love him?"
I throw my head back in laughter, this time more at ease than the first. "Please do not tell me you love the books because Percy was a simp? The series was about his adventures as a demigod and certainly not about his love life?"
"Percy Jackson was certainly not a simp," he argues.
"He was. But the totality of the story was not pinpointed to his love life thankfully, which is why I enjoyed it."
"So that means you do not like romance books?"
I shrug. "Romance—" Love. A fairytale word that would kill if you had expectations for it. "I read them, I just do not enjoy them."
"Why?" He questions, looking at me as if trying to decipher the answer from my face.
"I just don't. It is more of preference than a particular reason," I lie. I do not tell him that my heart has been shattered so much because I had high expectations of that word, but now I am wiser and I know how dangerous it can be to believe in love, once again.
[]
It is past 9 pm when I make my way into the dorms with Seven trailing behind me, we had both ditched the party after our weird discussion. Weird, because I never expected to speak with Seven Yusei and enjoy it. The front of my room comes into view, and I pause at the door inhaling sharply as I turn around to look at Seven, who hovers behind me like a hawk.
The moment I do, I regret it. The friendly look he had on later at the pool is gone like it was never there, and his visage is back to the one he had on the first day I met him — blank and lifeless, the only difference, is that the glaring at me is gone.
Confused, I want to ask him what is wrong. I want to ask him why he just suddenly switched, but over the years I have learned to mind my business. It is easier pretending not to notice things than speaking up about it. So I settle for a mumbled goodnight instead.
"Goodnight, Kamari," comes his robotic response. He is not looking at me, he is staring at the name tag on my door. It is changed now to my name, but before it was Elle's. Seven waits a while, and then just as swiftly disappears down the hallway. The wind hits my skin at his absence, eliciting a shiver from me as I enter the room.
The room feels a lot less uncomfortable when I enter, Elle's belongings are still around but I have them all stacked in a box and tucked inside my closet. I did that before I went to the party.
I scan the room, eyes zoning on the now bare walls in contrast to how it was decorated with wallpapers when I first came in. The pale pinkish paint of the room looks a lot more faint and the reading table is void of all things except a lamp. I turn the lock of my door and reach for my bag of supplies, finally feeling a little at ease as I start to display my belongings on the table.
I go to bed with a less burdened mind, even though something else still haunts my sleep — Seven Yusei's eyes whenever Elle is mentioned.