I did not reply the empress after our short talk. Instead i spend my time with little peach watching the ice melting away gently. The wind is still cold and piercing. The both of us stay indoors and play with paper puppets. Little peach is ending the nonsense stories that i make up everyday. She enjoy them. Laughing and crying. I start to teach her how to draw and how to mix colours. She had a fun time doing so. When she naps, she sleeps in my arms. She is someone i need to protect before i can send her away in a safe way.
Finally the ice have completely melted away. Little peach had grown up taller starts to run in the garden again. We spend our days quietly as possible. There is no possible way to get news from the outside. Even the eunuchs who serve this residence refuse to speak a single word unless about food, drinks or daily necessity. No matter how, we have peace here, for now.
One peaceful night, the door is push open. I wake up with a start. Little peach is still asleep. I look to the door, i can't see the face but the shape of it tells me it a man. As he walks in, the door i see behind is closed. Again outside there is two shadows shown through the paper door. "Do you want to talk here or outside? I think outside is better, the little one is fast asleep." Quietly i get out of the bed and pick up an outerwear and step out of the screen. "Your majesty." I cutesy.
Together we walk out of the door. The eunuchs open and close the door after us. He walk up to the courtyard in front of the bedroom. Nervously i follow behind. Once he stop, i stop walking too. Maintaining a distance between us.
"The empress had spoken to you, am i right?"
"Yes, your majesty."
"What is your answer?" His back continue to face me. While i can see his hands clutching tight behind his back.
"I can't do that because i have a husband..."
"I have a wife too and i have other woman before i accended on this throne."
"Then you don't need me. I am your brother's wife."
"I am doing what traditional expected me to do. If my brother did not die, i won't be here now in this cold bloody night talking to you. I probably making love with one of those woman in my harem!"
"Then you should not waste ..."
"I come here personally to tell you this." He turn around and walk near me. He place his hands on my shoulder."The royal astronomer had inform me that auspicious time is approaching for our mating date. This is to ward off the bad luck for the country and to calm the souls of the dead." He pause and look up to the moon. "I know my brother loves you a lot. I will give you all that he own you. I will give peach girl the best in her life. If we happen to have a child, then this son will be the future emperor after me. You will be the empress, the mother of the crown prince." I look at him with horror and i lost what i am going to say. "I will send you the wedding gown for our night to mate. I am sure you will enjoy it." He then whisper i my ears " After all i am his older brother, we have the same energy and stamina. I will give you all i have that night till morning." With that he pull back and smile. He walk any shamlessly and i stand at the same spot for a long time. My hands are trembling. My eyes are watery. I can't cry. I can't move. I desperately try to breath.
I stand there for quite sometime and slowly walk back to the bedroom. Little peach is still sleeping unaware of the guest that arrived in the night. I sit on the bed throughout out the night, thinking is there a solution to this. Am i going that path, what will my father think or do?
The next day while playing with little peach, i told her that grandma Su miss her and she should go stay there for awhile. "Mother what about you? Are you going there too?"
"There are some work to be done. I will join you later."
"I play with grandma Su. She got lots of nice food in that house. She loves me too."
"Yes she loves you as much as i do."
"Father is not coming back?" She asked as she fold her paper. She pick up a small pair of scissors to cut it. "No not yet. He is fighting the enemy at the border. "
"He is brave. I pray to the sky the other day. Asking for his safety. I may not know him but mother do know him. Everyone have a mother and father. I hope i have my father too. I think he will like me.I have been good."
"He will like you. Do you know his name?" She stop cutting and look up to the sky."Prince Xian. I hear people talking. I know." I touch her head gently. She look at me and smile. As she grows older, she looks like her mother. My heartache for this little child. A father that won't look at her. A mother that kill herself. Her material family had forgotten this child. The only one who now cares for her is me. How long can i protect her, i don't know. Maybe as the empress said, i have to seek help from the dragon throne.
i write to mother as soon as little peach is asleep at the pavilion next to me. With my paper and brush i write a very brief message to mother. I know this letter will be read by others therefore i can't write my original message. I hope mother understands why am i sending little peach to her. When she is out of these walls, she can be in a safer environment. The letter is pass to an eunuch and i gave him a gold nugget to ensure the letter reaches the su mansion. Meanwhile i request from the empress to send little peach out. She return with a reply it is granted. All at once, i start to pack little peach clothes, toys and books. She sit in a corner with a down turn lips. Her eyes glaze at the floor. Her hands hold her favourite toy.
"What is it my child?"
"I don't want to leave you."
"It's ok. Just for a few days. After that i will come to Su mansion too."
"How long is that few days?"
"Maybe five to seven days" She raise her pinky finger. "You must promise me."My pinky finger hook with her. I look at her and smile. "Promise."
The next day in the afternoon after lunch, i walk her to the main door where the carriage is waiting. We walk along the long passageway with her pressing hard on her own downturn lips. The hand that is holding me is tighter than usual. When we get to the carriage, i squad down. Eye to eye we look at each other and hug. "Remember you promise me."She whisper. I nod my head i fear i will lie to her this won't be just seven days. It could be longer.
Watching her get onto the carriage i hold back my tears. I try to smile for her. She wail as the carriage move away. I wave and watch them disappear on the turn. With her gone, i am truly alone. I will be the only one cage in everlasting beauty.