Lin Mu stood in front of his new home, side by side with his husband, feeling an overwhelming sense of bliss. The thought of now being part of Xiao Yan's life made him feel as though he was living a dream come true. It was hard for him to believe that his dream of living with his dearest had finally come true.
"Mind moving inside, brat!" Xiao Yan said, his irritation evident as he watched Lin Mu, who was lost in admiration of their new home. Without waiting, Xiao Yan walked in. Despite his annoyance, he felt a strange satisfaction seeing Lin Mu's delighted expression.
"Yan Ge, wait for me!" Lin Mu whined, hurrying after Xiao Yan.
"Beautiful!" Lin Mu exclaimed, his eyes widening as he entered the living room. He was enamored with the cozy space that looked warm, inviting, and comforting. Xiao Yan, watching from the doorway, felt a quiet contentment. He had designed their home with Lin Mu's preferences in mind, hoping to make it a place of happiness for the person he loved, even if he couldn't offer the love Lin Mu deserved.
"Lin Mu, this is the kitchen and dining area," Xiao Yan said, guiding Lin Mu through the house. Lin Mu followed like an eager puppy, happily humming. The kitchen was a mix of charcoal and dark brown, spacious and well-appointed. The dining area featured black and brown tones. Lin Mu's face lit up with joy as he took in their new home, imagining it as his sanctuary for the rest of his life, a sweet haven with the love of his life.
"This is your room. Feel free to let me know if you want any changes," Xiao Yan said, opening one of the doors on the second floor.
"Mine…?" Lin Mu asked, his voice trembling as he looked around the room. It seemed newly set up, and his expression turned to one of shock and dismay.
"Ge, are we staying in separate rooms?!" Lin Mu's voice quivered with fear. His world felt like it was collapsing. The joy he had moments ago evaporated, leaving him gasping for breath, his happiness shattered.
"… Yes…" Xiao Yan replied, his face darkening. He was pained by Lin Mu's distress, knowing the reason behind the separation was rooted in his own emotional wounds. He didn't want to face the boy who reminded him of all he had lost.
"Yan Ge, can't I stay in your room?" Lin Mu pleaded, his eyes filled with desperation. He yearned for a normal married life, hoping his husband might let him stay with him.
"… We can't. I don't want to see your face all night," Xiao Yan said bluntly, offering no room for discussion. Despite his harsh words, a pang of guilt gnawed at his heart as he saw Lin Mu's hopeful eyes.
"We're married. We're supposed to stay together for our whole lives. How can you ask me to stay away from my husband?!" Lin Mu cried out, tears streaming down his face, soaking his cheeks.
"I never wanted to be your husband, Lin Mu. Why didn't you find a better match? Was it me who forced you into this marriage? Haven't I told you not to expect anything from it? Why are you causing trouble again? Can't you let me rest for at least one day?!" Xiao Yan's voice was filled with long-suppressed pain, breaking his heart and leaving Lin Mu shattered.
"… I know what I did was wrong, but I'm helplessly in love with you. I just want a little attention from you. I just want you to look back at me, even for a moment. Am I wrong to expect a little attention?" Lin Mu sobbed, clinging to Xiao Yan's hands. His tears made Xiao Yan feel suffocated, struggling to understand why he should be compelled to love someone who loved him so deeply, or if it was possible for him to simply not fall in love.
"Do I have to love you just because you love me? Can't I choose my own feelings? You're making me sick, Lin Mu!" Xiao Yan's bitterness was palpable. He detested the type of love that stole others' happiness and freedom, and he hated Lin Mu for it, feeling it had ruined his life.
Lin Mu stood speechless, his heart aching with a deep sense of remorse. He didn't know what to say or do to avoid further alienating his husband. The weight of his past deeds pressed heavily on him, and he regretted everything except his hopeless love for Xiao Yan. Each of Xiao Yan's words felt like a knife to his heart, and Lin Mu felt utterly lost and heartbroken.
Xiao Yan, overwhelmed by the sight of Lin Mu's tears, felt his own heart ache. He couldn't bear to see his husband so devastated. He missed the bright smile Lin Mu used to have, the tender words, and the affectionate gaze. He longed for the gentle embrace and the loving touch. He just wanted his Yan Ge back. Was it too much to ask for?
Unable to bear the sight of Lin Mu's tears any longer, Xiao Yan left the room, his heart throbbing with a mix of frustration and sorrow. He didn't understand why his heart ached watching Lin Mu cry. He questioned whether pushing Lin Mu away was the right decision or if it was making everything worse.
Entering his office, Xiao Yan's dark mood unsettled his employees. They trembled, praying to keep their jobs safe from their newly married president's anger. They wondered what could have happened to make him so irritable when he was usually composed.
Xiao Yan sat at his desk, his head in his hands, when he heard someone enter without knocking. He knew it was Yu Yang, his best friend and trusted secretary, as no one else would dare to intrude like that.
Looking up, Xiao Yan offered a bitter smile.
"Yan Yan, why did you come if you're not feeling well?" Yu Yang asked with a concerned smile, taking a seat in front of Xiao Yan.
"I didn't want to stay there and watch him cry all day," Xiao Yan admitted, pouting. In front of his friend, he allowed himself to be vulnerable, grateful for Yu Yang's unwavering support through difficult times.
"Shouldn't you take responsibility? It must be you who made him cry, right?" Yu Yang remarked with a hint of smugness.
"Responsibility my foot," Xiao Yan retorted angrily.
"Hehe… Xiao Yan, have you seen your face?" Yu Yang chuckled, unable to suppress his amusement.
"What's so funny?" Xiao Yan snapped, exasperated by his friend's antics.
"It's just that you're showing so many emotions at once—anger, frustration, even a bit of silliness. Are you being affected by your husband?" Yu Yang teased with a smirk.
"Fuck off with your stinky mouth," Xiao Yan growled, his irritation clear.
"Truth hurts, brother. Now that you want me to fuck off, what will you do without me in the meeting?" Yu Yang asked with a knowing smile.
"Ugh, you shithead. Just stay then," Xiao Yan grumbled, conceding.
"I forgot why I came. Here, check these files," Yu Yang said, handing over a stack of documents.
"Are you kidding me? How am I supposed to review all this in an hour?" Xiao Yan asked in disbelief, noting that the next meeting was imminent.
"You're late, man, and you need to check all of this. It's your loss if you don't," Yu Yang said with a smirk, knowing how much Xiao Yan hated losing.
"Ugh. Leave me alone," Xiao Yan muttered, opening the documents. Yu Yang smiled as he watched Xiao Yan get to work.
...
It was 8 p.m. when Xiao Yan and Yu Yang were discussing a project, and Xiao Yan's phone began to ring, drawing their attention.
"..." Xiao Yan's face twisted with disgust as he looked at the caller ID.
"Who's that?" Yu Yang asked, noticing Xiao Yan's dark expression.
"Mrs. Lin," Xiao Yan said with a heavy sigh. He felt his blood boil at the thought of her but answered the call, knowing she would come over if he ignored her. The last thing he wanted was to see her face.
"Mrs. Lin," Xiao Yan said through gritted teeth, trying to control his rage.
"Where are you now?" Mrs. Lin asked sweetly on the phone, her voice grating on Xiao Yan's nerves.
"At the office," Xiao Yan replied curtly.
"Then my baby is alone at home, isn't he?" Mrs. Lin's voice was gentle but condescending.
"Yes," Xiao Yan confirmed tersely.
"Xiao Yan, how dare you leave my baby boy at home alone? You didn't even let us know where you are living. What if something happens to him?" Mrs. Lin shouted furiously.
"My home is more secure than your Lin villa, Mrs. Lin. Who do you think you are to shout at me? It's not my problem if your lovesick son didn't pick up your phone. And as for my address, you don't deserve to know. So, stay in your lane," Xiao Yan said coldly, recalling all the pain she had caused him, including the accident that took his parents' lives.
"How insolent of you, Xiao Yan. Didn't your parents teach you manners?" Mrs. Lin snapped.
"It's sad that because of someone as cold-blooded as you and your son, my parents got into that accident. So, I don't think you deserve my respect," Xiao Yan replied darkly, his last bit of patience gone.
"Mind your language, Xiao Yan," Mrs. Lin said furiously.
"I don't want to talk to someone like you," Xiao Yan said, preparing to
end the call. But Mrs. Lin's voice cut through again.
"Hey, you. I want to see my son. Give me your address!" Mrs. Lin demanded.
"You don't deserve to set foot in my home. If you want to see your son so badly, I'll be glad to send him to you forever. I hate the sight of him," Xiao Yan said with a sneer, hitting a nerve.
"Xiao Yan, you—"
Xiao Yan hung up, his frustration boiling over. He despised Mrs. Lin for blackmailing his parents, forcing them to arrange his marriage to Lin Mu, which led to the accident that took their lives. She had made his life a living hell from childhood, scaring away his friends and manipulating their family.
"Xiao Yan, calm down," Yu Yang said, handing him a glass of water.
"I think my life is going to be hell from now on, Yu Yang. What should I do? Everything feels wrong," Xiao Yan said, frustration evident in his voice. It was only the second day of their marriage, and he already felt trapped and suffocated.
"You can't do anything, Xiao Yan. You know you can't even divorce Lin Mu," Yu Yang said with a bitter smile. He understood his best friend's predicament—marriage to Lin Mu was a condition for saving his family business, promised in exchange for shares held by Mr. Lin. Yu Yang empathized with Xiao Yan's dejection and hurt.
"It's late. You should go home. I'll handle the rest of the files," Yu Yang said, offering a reassuring smile.
"Good night," Xiao Yan said as he prepared to leave.
...
When Xiao Yan arrived home, the lights were off. He turned them on and headed to his room, placing his bag on the sofa. He changed into his hoodie and sweatpants before heading to the kitchen, but he paused at Lin Mu's room.
Remembering Mrs. Lin's words, he hesitated before slowly pushing the door open. The darkness inside made his heart race; he knew Lin Mu suffered from nyctophobia—an intense fear of darkness. There must be something wrong. With a trembling heart, Xiao Yan switched on the lights and found Lin Mu unconscious on the floor. His breath caught in his throat as he saw how pale Lin Mu looked.
Rushing to Lin Mu, Xiao Yan carefully lifted him from the floor and cradled him in his lap. His arms trembled as he tried to find his voice.
"Lin Mu… Mumu…" His voice cracked, filled with desperation. He couldn't bear the thought of losing Lin Mu, not like he had lost his parents.