"Don't dream, Lin Mu," Xiao Yan said, his voice gentle but firm, trying his best not to come across as harsh. He knew that further distress could only worsen Lin Mu's condition.
"Yan Ge, why can't I dream?" Lin Mu asked in a weak, quivering voice.
"Lin Mu, you can dream of anything but me," Xiao Yan replied with a sigh. He didn't want to hurt him, but Lin Mu's persistent pleas were becoming increasingly difficult to bear.
"Yan Ge, I love you. Why can't I dream about someone I love?" Lin Mu's eyes brimmed with tears as they trickled down his delicate face.
Xiao Yan grimaced as he saw the tears.
"I can't control your dreams, Lin Mu," Xiao Yan said, his voice tinged with sadness. "But dreaming about me will only cause you pain." He knew deep down that even though he couldn't hate Lin Mu, his heart wasn't capable of reciprocating the deep affection Lin Mu felt for him.
"Yan Ge..." Lin Mu suddenly pulled Xiao Yan into an embrace, burying his face in Xiao Yan's neck, seeking solace. Xiao Yan's familiar scent always helped him feel calmer.
"What are you doing?" Xiao Yan's voice was cold, as he was uncomfortable with close contact. It brought back distressing memories he preferred to forget.
Lin Mu flinched and stumbled back, closing his eyes in horror as he braced for a fall. When he didn't feel any pain, he opened his eyes to find Xiao Yan's concerned face above him. His heart pounded so loudly that even Xiao Yan, who was deeply worried, was momentarily taken aback.
Seeing Xiao Yan's surprised expression, Lin Mu felt his cheeks flush crimson. He hid his face against Xiao Yan's chest in embarrassment. Yet, as he listened to Xiao Yan's steady heartbeat, a pang of sorrow gripped him. It was normal and calm, unlike his own racing heart. The realization that his husband's heart did not race for him, that Xiao Yan didn't share his feelings, was almost too much to bear.
"Yan Ge..." Lin Mu's voice was barely audible as he whimpered, exhaustion clear in his tone.
"Hm? What's wrong?" Xiao Yan asked, puzzled. Lin Mu had gone from being a blushing tomato to someone who spoke as though someone was seated on his chest.
"It hurts," Lin Mu said through his tears, his gaze locked with Xiao Yan's.
"Where does it hurt? Do you need to see a doctor?" Xiao Yan's voice was filled with panic as he frantically searched for his phone.
"Yan Ge..." Lin Mu grasped Xiao Yan's wrist, halting him.
"A doctor can't help," Lin Mu said, trembling slightly.
"Why not?" Xiao Yan asked, bewildered. He was certain that there was no ailment a doctor couldn't treat.
"My heart hurts. I'm lovesick," Lin Mu whispered. Xiao Yan's eyes widened in shock.
"It hurts so much when your heart doesn't race near me, as mine does for you. It's unbearable," Lin Mu sobbed uncontrollably.
"I'm sorry, Lin Mu. That's why I begged you not to marry me. I knew it would cause you more pain than it would me," Xiao Yan said with a heavy sigh.
"I can't help it, Yan Ge. Even if it hurts terribly, I still want to be close to you," Lin Mu said with a sad, yet resolute smile.
"Why?" Xiao Yan asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Lin Mu's words left him breathless.
"I want to live with you because it gives me a sliver of hope to survive. If I can't be with you, then I will die without hope," Lin Mu said with a melancholy smile.
Xiao Yan was at a loss for words.
"It's okay. I'm happy here," Lin Mu said, trying to comfort Xiao Yan and prevent him from feeling guilty.
"I'm hungry, Yan Ge," Lin Mu said with a cute pout, trying to lighten the mood.
"Ugh, I forgot. Let's go, or Yang will have my head. He can't stay hungry," Xiao Yan said with a hint of frustration.
Lin Mu felt a pang of jealousy. Xiao Yan seemed to care more about his friend than about him. The thought hurt him deeply. Yet, there was a small comfort in the fact that Xiao Yan was supporting him as they headed to the dining area. Despite his weakened state, Lin Mu's heart raced so fast he was sure Xiao Yan could hear it. They walked in silence, both reluctant to break it.
"You two are late," Yang sulked as they entered the room.
"Sorry, pig," Xiao Yan said with a playful wink.
"Xiao Yan, do you want a punch, brother?" Yan threatened, showing his fist.
"Please don't hurt Yan Ge," Lin Mu said, his eyes wide with fear for his husband.
Xiao Yan and Yang exchanged amused glances and burst into laughter.
"Xiao Yan, your little wife is adorable," Yang said, still laughing.
"But I'm a boy," Lin Mu protested with a pout.
"Aww, little boy. Xiao Yan is a man who likes to dominate, so you can only be his wife because you're going to be the bottom," Yang said with a grin.
Lin Mu's face turned bright red at Yang's words, and he buried his face in Xiao Yan's chest, feeling utterly embarrassed.
"Ugh, Yang, shut your mouth," Xiao Yan said, incredulous at his friend's choice of words, especially in front of someone as young and vulnerable as Lin Mu. Even though Lin Mu was 21, Xiao Yan still saw him as a child, and this was another reason he struggled to accept Lin Mu's love.
"Sorry, sorry. Can we eat now? I'm starving," Yang said, pouting as he dove into his meal.
"Why are you having all these delicious foods while mine is just rice congee?" Lin Mu whined.
"Lin Mu, you're ill," Xiao Yan said gently.
"But... but..." Lin Mu whined, making a puppy dog face.
"Little boy, just eat it today. Xiao Yan will be all yours with his food," Yang said with a smirk.
Lin Mu blushed deeply and dug into his congee, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and gratitude.
"Yang, you'll never change," Xiao Yan said with a sigh, shaking his head.
"Thanks for the compliment, brother," Yang said, digging into his delicious food.
Lin Mu was sitting in the living room with Yang while Xiao Yan walked in after washing dishes.
"Yang, get to work. Don't act like a child watching cartoons," Xiao Yan said, noticing Yang was engrossed in a cartoon.
"Yes, boss," Yang replied with a pout, turning to work on his laptop.
Lin Mu felt a pang at being called a child. He pouted and sat in boredom, but his husband's serious demeanour while working was enough to captivate him. Yang grinned, noticing how Lin Mu was eyeing Xiao Yan with intense interest.
"Xiao Yan, man, you seem to be making someone hungry here," Yang said with a smirk as he winked at Xiao Yan.
Xiao Yan looked at Lin Mu, who was staring at him with such intensity it was almost palpable. He shook his head in annoyance.
Lin Mu looked down, feeling embarrassed at being caught staring so openly. He felt flushed and was about to leave when he realized he was too weak to stand. He didn't have the courage to ask Xiao Yan for help, fearing he might fall. So, he remained seated, watching the two workaholic men with a sense of helplessness.
Hours passed, and it was nearly midnight when Lin Mu woke to see Xiao Yan still immersed in his work, fighting off sleep. He wanted to ask Xiao Yan to rest, knowing he probably hadn't slept the previous night due to worry over Lin Mu. He felt guilty but was afraid to request Xiao Yan to rest, fearing he might be reprimanded.
As his gaze shifted from Xiao Yan to Yang, he saw Yang glancing at Xiao Yan occasionally, feeling a pang of jealousy at the thought of someone sneaking glances at his husband.
"Xiao Yan, man, go sleep. Don't make me resort to drugging you," Yang said in a stern tone.
Lin Mu flinched at Yang's voice, which sounded even more frightening than Xiao Yan's angry voice. Tears welled up in his eyes.
"Little one, don't cry. I won't hurt anyone close to Xiao Yan," Yang said, offering Lin Mu a reassuring smile.
Lin Mu pouted and nodded like a child.
"Yang, there are too many files to check. I can't sleep. Can I?" Xiao Yan asked with a weary sigh.
"Man, why am I here if my best friend can't sleep? Go get some rest. I'll stay until we finish all this," Yang said firmly.
"What about lunch?" Xiao Yan asked, glancing at Lin Mu, who needed food.
"I'll cook. You need to sleep now," Yang said decisively.
Xiao Yan cast one more worried glance at Lin Mu, concerned that they might argue if he left.
"Don't worry. I won't eat your kitten if he annoys me," Yang said with a smirk, causing Lin Mu to pout at the remark.
"Fine," Xiao Yan said, heading to his room.
Yang resumed his work, feeling Lin Mu's gaze on him. He looked up to see Lin Mu looking at him with a mixture of curiosity and embarrassment.
Yang let out a sigh, closed his laptop, and fixed his gaze on Lin Mu with a playful smirk.
"What's up, kitty?" Yang asked.
Lin Mu pointed at Yang, questioning if he was the "kitty" in question.
"Who else could be the kitty here other than you?" Yang said with a grin.
"I'm not a kitty," Lin Mu protested softly.
"Okay then, little one," Yang said, his tone still playful.
"So, what is it? Do you have something to ask or say?" Yang inquired.
"T-thank you. And s-sorry," Lin Mu said, looking down and fidgeting with his fingers.
"Why?" Yang asked, genuinely puzzled about what he had done to deserve thanks or what Lin Mu was apologizing for.
"I... I was jealous of you. I'm sorry," Lin Mu confessed, his eyes reflecting genuine remorse.
"That's not your problem. Anyone would feel jealous in your place," Yang said with a kind smile.
"Thank you, Ge, for making Xiao Yan go to sleep. He looked so exhausted taking care of me," Lin Mu said, his gratitude evident.
"We're best friends, Lin Mu. I can read Xiao Yan like an open book. So, no need to thank me. It's my duty to support my bestie," Yang said with a smile that made Lin Mu admire him even more.
"Can I call you Yang Ge?" Lin Mu asked with a hopeful pout.
"Only if you promise not to hurt my bestie with your actions or words," Yang replied, aware of everything Lin Mu had done.
"I'm sorry, Ge. I won't ever hurt Yan Ge again," Lin Mu said, his guilt evident.
"Then feel free to call me whatever you want," Yang said, his smile broadening.
"Yang Ge, thank you," Lin Mu said, his smile reflecting his genuine appreciation. Yang's heart warmed at Lin Mu's innocence and sincerity.