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Some Weird Sitcom

Roufail
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chs / week
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Synopsis
Join the group of incompetent idiots that go by the names of Roufail, Tempest and Leo on their slice of life story. Their friend group? Too big. Their combined IQ? Room temperature. Their experiences? Based on real events. -------------------------------------- Author: Roufail Editors: Leo & Tempert Oliver: Oliver
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Chapter 1 - Remember That Time We Got Intertwined In A Gang War

Tempest, Kewmed and Leo are running away from a gang of jocks

-"KEWMED! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT???" Leo asked

-"I mean I didn't think it would be that big a deal. Besides, running builds character!" Kewmed answered

"JUST SHOVE IT AND RUN!" Leo yelled.

*3 hours earlier*

"So, what's the plan for today?" Roufail asked.

-"Well I owe some money to a guy, and I'm going to discuss some payment, you guys wanna be my wingmen?" Kewmed said

-"What kid of guy-" Leo attempted to ask before getting interrupted by Roufail

-"Aight bet where we meeting?"

-"Paper St. in one hour." Kewmed exclaimed

-"I guess that's a plan. See you lot then, I suppose." Tempest said reluctantly.

-"You didn't answer me!" Leo told Kewmed.

-"See ya." Kewmed didn't really care about Leo's opinion.

Epic transition to Paper St.

-"Where's Kewmed?" Leo asked Tempest

-"He said he'll be here in a minute. But I'm surprised you even bothered showing up."

-"Someone needs to supervise you guys."

-"Yeah keep telling yourself that."

More time passed as the two of them awkwardly stood around, thinking about who Kewmed owed money to.

-"Hey dudes. Where's Roufail?" Kewmed asked upon finally arriving.

-"Running late as per usual I assume. Let's call him." Leo said.

-"Hey guys, I'm on my way, I'm next to the school, should take me 5 minutes." Roufail responded.

Five minutes passed.

-" So that was a lie." Tempest exclaimed.

-"Can't keep the boss waiting any longer, this is some serious biz." Kewmed said as he started walking away.

-" Boss? What is this, the mafia?" Leo asked before getting met by the same lack of response.

Epic transition to the Boss' office

-"Welcome back to the jock mafia, Kewmed." the "boss" said.

-"Of course it's the mafia." Leo was too tired from all the walking to care about this situation at this point.

-" Here to repay your debt?" the boss asked.

-"Well I'm kinda short on cash, so…"

-" So you're gonna sell us these kids?"

-"Exsqueeze me?" Tempest said.

-" No these are my guys. Is there anything else I can do?" Kewmed asked the boss

-"Why is he so chill about this?" Leo whispered to Tempest.

Tempest just shrugged.

-"Well theres sumn' you can do…" the boss said.

Phone ringtone

Leo picked it up.

-"Hey guys where you at? I took the Tram, I'm outside the place."

-"What tram  you imbecile, you said you were five minutes off!" Leo told Roufail.

-" Five minutes off the station yes."

-"What station? We were at Paper St.!"

-"Paper? I thought you said Pootsarxidia St."

-"I'm not even gonna question how you misheard that. Just hurry up and take the tram back!"

Call end

"Anyway." the boss said before continuing "A rival gang stole my most treasured artifact. GOLDEN VAPE."

-"Pfft, you're serious?" Leo laughed at his face.

-"SHUT UP LACKEY! Anyway Imma need you to go steal it back."

-"Wait a minute, who are you again?" Tempest asked.

-"I'm the boss."

-"Okay but what's your name."

-" Boss."

-"Yeah okay Joe cut the crap." Leo mocked him.

-"Joe Lasios from school? He runs the mafia?" Tempest was absolutely flabbergasted.

-"Bah, should have figured you'd find out. Don't you tell anyone about this, i have a lot of guys out there. Consider this a warning." Joe threatened them.

-"It's a truce then. For now."

-"Hurry up you guys, we got a job to do!" Kewmed hurried.

Epic transition to Roufail

-"I can't believe it. Paper St? How did i miss this!? Well the next tram should be arriving soon.... Nevermind, it got delayed indefinitely. I should call a cab." he thought to himself.

Roufail proceeded to pull out his phone in order to call for a cab.

-"Howey ho!" the cab driver exclaimed.

-"Wait a minute, i know this voice! it's Renie from school!" Roufail said out loud.

-"Ah Roufail! Who could have thought!"

-" You are a taxi driver? You aren't even old enough to drive!"

-" Look do you want a ride or not? I can discount you since you're my little buddy!"

-" I'm literally taller than you, but fine. I'll send you my location."

Epic transition back to the guys

-" You even know where they keep the ultivape?" Tempest asked

-" Ya, rival gang has this old warehouse by the marina. Should be packed with people though, need to sneak in." Kewmed explained.

-" Well i trust you. Lead the way!"

-"Well i don't. Who's this rival gang anyway?" Leo asked Kewmed.

-"The most ruthless and dangerous of all. Kindergartners."

-"Are you kidding me?"

-"Shush! We're here."

-"Yeah this would be like stealing candy from a baby, just the candy is a vape for some reason." Leo exclaimed.

-"What do the toddlers even need a vape for." Tempest wondered.

-" They use it as a symbol of superiority over the jocks. Now pipe down, we gotta get in. Leo, you're short, you can probably sneak in and open the back door." Kewmed explained.

-"I'm not short! I'm average height!" Leo coped.

-"Yeah whatever you big baby, will you do it or what?"

-"Fine."

Leo exhaled as he started walking towards the back door.

-"Uhh hey chief?" he asked jokingly once the guard located him.

-" Name and ID."

-"I'm uhh Loe and my id is... 17 or something?"

-"You new here boy?"

-"Yes? The boss wants to see me…"

-"Go right in."

-"Thank you sir?"

Leo went past the guard and rushed to the bathroom, where the back door is.

-"Hurry up before someone shows up!"

-"I can't believe that worked. Leo, seriously? How did he buy that??" Tempest was absolutely flabbergasted.

-" Perks of being a nobody i guess." Leo coped.

-"Perks of being a short nobody, you mean. Cmon follow me, i know where they keep it." Kewmed said.

Epic transition back to Roufail

-" Renie, where are you going?" he asked Renie.

-" I'm going where you asked me to!"

-" Do you even know how to drive?"

-" Well, not really."

-" How did you get hired in this company?"

-" Hired? You said you wanted a drive."

-"But I called the taxi service!"

-"Maybe you typed the phone number wrong. But it doesn't matter now, you'll reach your destination in no time! I should make that my slogan!"

-"WATCH OUT THERE'S A TRUCK HEADING TOWARDS US!"

Insert epic footage of them narrowly missing

-"HEY WATCH OUT YOU ASSHOLE! Who drives the wrong way like that…" Renie yelled.

Sirens then started blaring behind them.

-"Us apparently…We can't let the cops catch us, hit the gas!" Roufail exclaimed.

Epic transition back to the guys

-"There it is, behind this door." Kewmed said.

-" I think i can hack this panel. Move." Tempest proceeded to enter an epic hacker session.

*door opens*

-"There! Now let's get it and run!"

A little later, at boss office

-"You actually did it? Consider your debts repaid. Now hand ot over." Joe said.

-"Aight, catch!"

Kewmed proceeds to throw the vape at Joe, miss, and hit a comically large lava pit stationed nearby, melting the vape.

Everyone stood in silence.

-"So we went through all that for NOTHING??" Leo was absolutely furious.

-"Ah well, i brought back the vape in many... Molten, pieces, but i still brought it back! Later, Mr. J." Kewmed said as he opened the door to make a run for it.

-"GET THEM!"

Jocks then proceeded to run after them, and they would've definitely caught up to them if it wasn't for the fact that their lung capacity had become virtually non existent after all the vaping.

-"KEWMED! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT???" Leo asked

-"I mean I didn't think it would be that big a deal. Besides, running builds character!" Kewmed answered

"JUST SHOVE IT AND RUN!" Leo yelled.

-"I don't get paid enough for this shit." Tempest complained.

-"WE AIN'T PAID AT ALL!!" Leo yelled.

"COME BACK HERE YOU! BOSS WANTS VENGEANCE FOR THE ULTIVAPE!" a jock yelled.

They continued running around like idiots, when suddenly, a car came crashing through, hitting all of the jocks away, followed by a couple dozen cop cars

-" STEP OUT OF THE VEHICLE WITH YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE 'EM! YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!" a cop yelled.

-" I invoke the 5th!!" Renie invoked the fifth.

-"OH FUCK YOU LAW BY MIKE, HURRY UP!" the cop yelled, clearly yelling violating Renie's 5th ammendment right.

-"What the hell is going on??" Tempest asked, flabbergasted as ever.

-" HE KIDNAPPED ME OFFICER!! ARREST THIS MAN!!" Roufail told the cops.

-"Roufail?? What are you doing here??" Leo asked Roufail.

-"It's a long story…why's there a pile of jocks under the car??"

-" Long story, but i doubt it's longer than yours."

-"I'M INNOCENT I TELL YOU!! INNOCENT!" Renie said.

-"ARE YOU SHITTING ME? YOU RAN OVER A PREGNANT MOTHER AND HER CHILDREN!" the cop responded.

-"LIES, DECEPTION!!!"

-"I'LL SEE YOU IN COURT BUDDY!"

The cop said as he dragged Renie out of the car and put handcuffs on him.

-" I guess we're missing class tomorrow!" Tempest exclaimed.

Insert laugh track.