"It's the most wonderful time of the year♪" hummed an excited Ezraphel as she flitted about the kitchen.
It was a cool morning in the first week of December and if it wasn't already obvious Ezraphel was in a decidedly festive mood and part of the reason for this being that Christmas was just around the metaphorical corner. Christmas, as it turned out shared similarities with a certain winter festival on Eos. This festival was originally celebrated by the worshippers of the Chief God but was appropriated by Mamono following the 'acquisition' of several human kingdoms whose newly corrupted populace chose to celebrate it in spirit.
Having travelled to many places experiencing many cultures and therefore taking part in many celebrations there weren't many festivals that Ezraphel can celebrate outside the region where it was born. This particular winter festival however was one that was created by the church of the Chief God itself and its celebration was heralded as a religious holiday granting it popularity in the vast majority of settlements that had the Chief Gods church as the state religion.
At that specific time of the year Ezraphel literally could not escape this festival unless she spent her time exclusively outside the area with the largest congregation of humans dubbed colloquially as the 'Order Continent' which was not impossible but certainly not something she would seriously consider. Besides, she actually loved the festival for all that it has become synonymous with the Holy Order and especially the current Chief God it actually predates her reign according to mamono scholars. In fact as she found out during her visit to Al Mar the festival was actually made to honor the original Chief God.
Even then Ezraphel would also like to imagine with how much the current Chief God hates Mamono it must really rankle her to be 'worshipped' by the very creatures she despised. As a tactic it was brilliant and Ezraphel was all for it even if she would never buy into the religion she would never pass up the opportunity to mock the being responsible for propagating a senseless cycle of war and violence.
The Lilim paused and took a deep breath 'I think that's enough thoughts on Her.'
The Chief God did not exist in this world and while 'Christianity' can be considered a facsimile of the light goddess there were marked differences. Not that the religion itself seemed to hold much sway with the majority of earth's population…despite having practitioners numbering in the billions. Just imagining that many people worshipping the current Chief God made the Lilim audibly shudder.
Yet despite undoubtedly being the most popular religion in the world most of humanity are not Christians. In fact in recent times there seems to be a counter-religious movement amongst the younger generation with the rise of atheism though that in itself was a whole other rabbit hole she did not want to go back into.
Ezraphel turned away from these thoughts as the tell tale signs of her Stanley trudging down the stairs reached her ears.
"Good morning Stanley~"
"Hrm" grumbled the man as he sat at the table.
She could hear the tiredness in his tone and couldn't help but smile to herself. The two of them spent what amounted to several days indulging in each other's body. Though they both ended up exhausting the other Ezraphel was quicker to recover due to being able to actively convert the Spirit Energy received back into her reserves of strength and stamina. This should be the case every time however in some cases the overstimulation would render her catatonic leading to her Stanley recovering before she did.
This was not one of those times.
"Why are you so happy?" he grumbled easily picking up on her mood.
"Aren't I always happy after our shared time together?" she asked back teasingly.
"Yeah" he conceded "but this isn't the 'we just had sex' type happy, this is something else."
"I didn't know there was a difference."
"There is with you."
Ezraphel's translation: "you're the only person I care enough about to pick up on your emotions."
"Aww~" the Lilim blushed "I love you Stanley."
"Whatever."
Ezraphel's translation: "I love you too."
"As for why I am so happy, do you know what time of the year it is?"
"..." Stanley gave her a look.
Ezraphel's Translation: "woman I am barely awake. What makes you think I know something like that?"
Yet despite this response Ezraphel could feel something off with it, with him. She almost squinted at him but instead carried along as if nothing was wrong.
Clearing her throat she spoke with a giggle "I'll give you a hint~"
Accompanying her words she pointed up and Stanley eyes followed in the direction of her finger to find a piece of plant wrapped in a red bow floating just above his head. Stanley stared at it for about half a second and during that time his sleepy indifference morphed into confusion then dawning realization before his eyes squinted into irritation.
"Oh. Fuck. Me."
"Is that an invitation?" Ezraphel's low husky voice purred into his ear with a puff of warm breath.
Despite her sudden appearance literally next to him Stanley was not startled. Instead his brows furrowed as he turned his head to glare at his girlfriend who was bent over to be on his level. Ezraphel for her part was unfazed by his glare as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
"If you insist on continuing our tryst then I will happily oblige."
To that she used magic to slide the chair he sat on from the table and repositioned herself to sit horizontally on his lap.
Cupping his face gently in her hands while staring lovingly in his still glaring eyes she continued "however, I will settle for a kiss instead."
As she went in for it she was suddenly halted by Stanley palm "hold up."
"Hm?" she hummed inquisitively at the interruption "what is it?"
"Can we not do any of those holiday airsoft specials this time around? The Halloween one was way too long and for some reason feels unfinished."
Ezraphel blinked at his words and the serious expression he delivered it with.
"Well I wasn't planning on doing that this time~"
And upon saying that she gently lowered his hand to her chest which he absently plamed and gave a light squeeze.
Perfect~
"It's just going to be you and me with no distractions~" she purred with a devilish smile and naturally smokey eyes.
He held her gaze for a long moment before nodding "proceed-hmph!"
Later…
After breakfast Stanley retreated to his office and out of habit booted up his PC yet his mind was far from work or play.
"So it's that time of the year again."
Despite the words Stanley's tone lacked the usual vitriol accompanying such a sentence. He already knew this day would come eventually and didn't hold any hope of being able to gaslight Ezraphel into missing it. Christmas was among the few holidays that Stanley was cognizant of. It helped that it was literally the only holiday he could never ignore even as an anti-social shut-in.
'Why did I even bother playing dumb?' he genuinely wondered to himself.
He already knew the reason why. Because they've had that conversation before where she would ask what day it was and he would be oblivious and she would reveal it to get a reaction. He would frown and complain while she would feel some satisfaction and from there shenanigans would occur almost like a sitcom. That was their 'routine' and if he was being honest he didn't really mind it, in fact he was always at least a little curious as to what her reaction to his reaction would be. A long makeout session is one of the more middling responses, a compromise that didn't end up with him blowing her back out on the dinner table…again.
Shaking his head of thoughts of sex and the twitch of his dick at said thoughts despite just coming out of a sex marathon only a few hours ago Stanley's mind went back to the situation at hand.
When you think about Christmas you think about people going out with friends, spending time with family, giving and receiving gifts, celebrating cultural or religious festivals and generally spreading cheer and happiness. Now look at Stanley an antisocial hermit content with being alone with all his irl friends scattered across the country and being on the outs with most of his family. By all accounts he should hate Christmas and generally speaking it's hard for him to like a holiday whose values and traditions seem to be the antithesis of his existence.
Miraculously despite its best efforts and Stanley's attitude leaning towards enmity he didn't actually hate Christmas. At the same time he couldn't say that the holiday has been good to him in the recent years. For example in contrast to him his sister loved Christmas and once upon a time actually went out of her way to instill some of that mythical Christmas spirit in him. Her latest idea of doing that involved forcing him to go out of the house to attend a Christmas. One can imagine how well that worked out but at least he can say there wasn't a dramatic (or traumatic) series of events that added to his already infinitesimally small tolerance for parties.
To make a long story short Stanley ended up sequestering himself in a corner watching everyone else going about their business literally becoming the real life representation of that one meme with the wojack standing in the corner with a cup of eggnog mentally complaining about everything and wishing he was home playing videogames. The only reason he even stuck around till the end was because unlike him his sister actually wanted to be there surrounded by other people and generally had a good time. At least he assumed so because she got drunk off the booze-nog forcing him to become the designated driver and ferry her home.
At least he knew why she didn't put up a fight when he insisted on using his car to go to the party instead of hers.
Bitch threw up in his car on the way home, twice.
Never. Again.
Anyway if one were to describe Stanley's stance on Christmas in a single word then it would be…ambivalence. At worst he was annoyed by some of the antics surrounding the holiday such as the sanctimonious bullshit but at the same time he can appreciate the heavy commercialization of it.
Yeah that's right Stanley liked the commercialization of Christmas.
The decorations may be bright, gaudy, overboard in some cases and he'd never do it of his own volition but they look great, are eye catching and pleasing to his sensibilities.
The radio might be blasting holiday jingles 24/7 especially a specific one but he fucking loved Mariah Carey's music anyway.
Streaming services might be pushing ads for garbage cash grab holiday movies but it's easy to disregard those for the actual good shit: Home Alone 1&2, How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Jim Carrey version), Jingle All The Way, The Nightmare Before Christmas, A Christmas Story and Die Hard.
Yes Die Hard is a Christmas movie and he will fight anyone who dare say otherwise.
Then there are the special deals, bundles and discounts for online purchases by corporations looking to take advantage of the literal millions of people desperate to buy gifts for friends and family.
And let's not even go into the Christmas themed videogame promos and holiday events.
It was a peculiar thing, this balance Christmas managed to create and maintain as it relates to Stanley but one that he didn't mind at all.
Now that balance was being 'threatened' by Ezraphel's presence tipping the scales. Beyond her just keeping him company she was fully prepared to drag him literally kicking and screaming into actually celebrating Christmas.
And as if to make his case in point the Lilim appeared behind him with a shout of "Stanley!"
Stanley startled immediately turning towards the intruder ready to go on a venomous tirade but hesitated due to the stricken expression on her beautiful face.
"We have a problem!"
The urgency of her voice had his pulse racing for a moment "what is it?"
"We don't have any Christmas decorations!" she exclaimed in that same urgent tone that for some (obvious) reason now seemed melodramatic.
If this were an anime he would have face faulted instead he simply gave her a bland glare.
"So?"
"So!?" she exclaimed loudly and overdramatically "we can't celebrate without decorations…and a tree!"
"And?"
"Stanley this is serious!" she exclaimed while stamping her foot in indignation.
"Ez" he began patiently.
"Yes?"
"You have magic."
"So?"
'So!?'
In contrast to his mental exclamation he calmly continued "magic up some decorations and a tree."
"…no."
Naturally her answer surprised him "what?"
The Lilim folded her arms with a resolute expression "I said no, I won't use my magic for this."
This would be the point where Stanley would shrug and accept her decision while deliberately turning back to his computer to signal his lack of interest in the situation itself. Yet taking the time to look beyond his indifference and into his girlfriend's interest in the situation he found himself…curious.
And so with a mental deep breath he spoke "I feel compelled to ask why you won't use magic for this."
Ezraphel blinked, clearly she expected the initial reaction he entertained but nonetheless she wasn't complaining about his consideration.
"Well I thought it would be a good idea for us to make a day out of it."
"You mean like another date?"
"More of a couple's outing."
'Yeah because there's a difference' he wanted to roll his eyes at the semantics.
Still he thought about her words for a long moment and became very suspicious.
'Something doesn't add up.'
Something about this situation was fishy and Stanley not being the type of man to beat around the bush immediately confronted her about his suspicions.
"What aren't you telling me Ez?"
He saw it. It was only for a split second but he saw the moment her shoulders stiffen and felt a flash of panic through their bond.
"W-what do you mean? I'm not hiding anything."
You know all things considered Ezraphel wasn't a terrible liar but much like she could see through most of his actions and read him like an open book it went both ways. It also helped that weeks of being able to sus out magical shenanigans through their bond and put her under extra scrutiny in the past meant that more often than not she would eschew trying to use magic to shield her emotions from him when he's confronting her directly like this.
Now his eyes narrowed in the usual glare of his that conveyed "cut the bullshit."
He didn't even need to say anything merely watching as she initially stood her ground before squirming under his scrutiny.
"Okay fine!" she eventually yelled "I'll tell you the truth."
He did not smirk in satisfaction though he did radiate a bit of it as he leaned back in his game chair.
"Proceed" he ordered and she conjured her own chair to sit on as she began to explain.
Turns out this was about her Halloween decorations and almost immediately Stanley found himself cringing a little. See initially Ezraphel came to him with the idea of decorating the house for Halloween because she saw some of her neighbors were doing it. For his part Stanley only did the bare minimum with an old electric jack-o-lantern. Deep down he'd like to do more but general laziness stopped him from doing this.
He figured why not but knowing better than to leave the Lilim unsupervised when it came to ideas of public displays he made the ultimatum that he had to approve of whatever she would use as decorations. Stanley only realized that he underestimated how much she wanted to do this when she came at him with a full on presentation which included a scale model mock up of the house.
What followed was the two of them in the living room going through decoration ideas that truly tested his mental fortitude. If it wasn't for the fact that Ezraphel was genuinely excited about it and whatever she went with would be viewed by the entire neighborhood he would have clocked out long before they reached an amicable conclusion. In the end he lost three whole hours that he wasn't going to get back but in exchange he received a happy girlfriend who then gave him a Happy Ending so it all balanced out.
As far as he knew the decorations were well received and if nothing else the novelty of seeing more than an old jack-o-lantern out front garnered much approval from the neighbors. Ezraphel said as much though she also added that the decorations also got the attention of the Desperate Housewives Club.
Now that wasn't their name, they didn't really have an official name but the name fit nonetheless. Just imagine a collective of married middle age women in the neighborhood who've basically been allowed carte blanche of all the minutiae of a neighborhood as well as involve themselves in all the drama and bullshit as well. From organizing community events to running the neighborhood group chat and running what is essentially an information network the DHC have their hands in basically everything in regards to the neighborhood.
Ezraphel had already been acquainted with them and even had infrequent conversations with them but this was the first time she got involved with one of their competitions. It wasn't necessarily something official so much as it was a 'friendly' competition. Yeah turns out the reason behind why the houses on his street had those eye catching Christmas decorations he secretly admired were the DHC members competing against each other in a vanity competition.
Does that diminish the admittedly impressive work they did on those decorations?
Objectively? No.
Personally? Yes.
And now Ezraphel was on their radar trying to suck her into their orbit more than she already was. He didn't like it and he told her as much but the thing about that was-
"But I want to do it" she stated without the tiniest hint of hesitance and completely straight face.
'Fuck me.'
She had that determinedly stubborn look that let him know there wasn't anything he could reasonably say to dissuade her without seeming like a hypocrite since he wanted her to socialize and make friends without him.
So with that in mind Stanley decided not to even try convincing.
"Whelp good luck with that" he stated before turning away to face his computer.
He didn't even get to do anything before his chair was forcibly swiveled to an Ezraphel who was looming over him. She had bent forward holding the chair's armrests with her hands practically boxing him in. Despite her cleavage being right there he was more focused on her expression which was uncharacteristically stern.
"Stanley you will help me with this."
'Fuck me sideways.'
Now he was finding reasons to hate Christmas.