"I don't want to..." I mumbled as Taehyung gently rubbed my shoulder trying to comfort me, "You heard what Yoongi said..." He kept his voice low and soft, we were standing in the kitchen of the hotel, nobody else was in the room as per request. I was about to drink the blood Yoongi said I needed, but it looked revolting. And remembering everything I did to the blood I drank last time, it was terrifying.
Taehyung gently took the glass of dark red liquid from me, I stared at him as he took a small sip of it, "See? It's not that bad...." I smiled softly at his sweet and thoughtful action knowing to him it would be even more revolting to drink and also likely to make him sick, yet he still did it to try and comfort me and get me less disgusted amd hesitant.
It helped slightly but I still didn't want to do it, I shook my head still smiling at him, "Im sorry.... I just.... Can't.." I mumbled, looking down back at my lap, being sat on the counter.
The next thing I knew Taehyung was touching my chin and lifting it to look at him, I'm not sure what he was thinking but he pressed his lips onto mine, I was at first shocked but let him do it nonetheless as I felt blood seeping into my mouth. It didn't taste as disgusting as I would've liked it to, I don't want to drink this.
But oh my god do I want to kiss Taehyung.
I gently took his waist in my hands pulling him between my legs, kissing him deeply and slowly, not caring much about the blood anymore and letting it fall down my throat and allowing myself to swallow it. He pulled back slowly and looked up at me, small drops of blood dripping down his lips. He lifted his hand to show he had the glass in between his fingers, he gently pulled my jaw open, bringing the glass to my lips.
At that point I was so fucking amazed by him that I didn't even register or care about the blood anymore, I kept eye contact with him as I swallowed the blood. Gasping after I've drank most of it when he pulled the glass away. I could feel blood dripping down my own lips as well as his. I seemed to realize for the first time that he only kissed me to try and force the blood down my throat, and that he tricked me into drinking it. But I didn't care, I couldn't care seeing his beautiful eyes looking up at me.
My grip on his waist tightened, I closed my mouth and pierced my lips together trying to stop myself. But ultimately I'm still partly human.
I harshly pulled his body to mine, squeezing him tightly as my lips crashed into his. I couldn't make out exactly what was going on, I felt out of it. But I knew I wanted him at that moment. Badly.
So that's exactly what I took.
Am I thinking this threw? No.
Am I in the right mindset to be making this decision? No.
Am I gonna regret this later? Yes.
But that still didn't stop me, I kissed him aggressively and made fucking sure he couldn't go anywhere, I wrapped my legs around his body and forced him to kiss me back. He was making some noises but they didn't seem to be asking me to stop.
Just to make sure I wasn't accidentally assaulting him I pulled back and kissed his neck, giving him time to speak if he wanted me to stop.
Hearing him gasp and grab onto my thighs, his other hand on my shoulder and his head hung back. I looked up at him while still kissing his neck, seeing the unholy face he was making... It was too much. It's so fucking attractive.
I couldn't handle this, I wanted to do a million things to him, I kept going between kissing him and his neck, I started to grab onto his shirt. Pulling it up but still focusing on his lips, I harshly pulled back and ripped his shirt off his body, immediately going down to his nipple and starting to suck on them.
I could feel him grabbing onto my head, his back arching backwards as his fingers entangled and tugged at my hair, I could hear his voice breaking as he moaned my name.
I was only down there for a minute or two before he pushed me away, almost falling over as he tried to get away from me.
"No! You cant- what are you doing?!" It seemed he had some kind of revolution as he suddenly didn't like it, I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me, "Why so sudden?.." I kept my voice calm and made sure not to overreact, he only needed to say one thing to bring me back to reality, "Jimin..."
My eyes widened slightly as I realized what the hell I was doing to him, I harshly and suddenly pushed him away, causing him to fall onto the floor.
I grabbed the glass of unfinished blood and downed the last bit, then stormed away with tears in my eyes, I looked back at him before leaving the room.
"You disgust me...." I whispered to him, I could see the hurt look on his face but honestly I didn't care.
I stomped out of the room and to my bedroom, angrily slamming the door and immediately collapsing onto the floor sobbing.
I can't believe I just did that, what the fuck is wrong with me?
All the emotions was overwhelming me greatly, and I couldn't stop myself from crying, hitting the floor repeatedly in frustration.
Nothing could've prepared me for these feelings, such a big mixture of hatred, sadness, resentment and lo-.. I don't want to say it. I don't love him.
They're all wrong.
I don't love him.
I hate him with everything in my body.
I love Jimin.
I don't love Taehyung.
I can't love him.
Not after all these years..