Chereads / The R.E.M Chronicles: Lucid. / Chapter 4 - Chapter 4: Past.

Chapter 4 - Chapter 4: Past.

Saturday.

Day 5.

Issa. 

Lectra didn't judge my hoe-phase in the old classroom, thankfully. Though, she was judging George for acting as if nothing happened between us.

I did, out of spite, end up ordering the dumb skirt, along with many other cute outfits. Cam wasn't going to tell me what I should or shouldn't buy just because he thought he knew me better than I did.

A few slow days pass of being here at the school, and it was feeling way too comfortable almost already. Lectra ended up showing me around the school better than Kris had throughout the days, since she had free time all the time. She even introduced me to a few more of her friends, which was funny to find out most were guys.

She eventually brought me to the computer labs and we spent time working on projects to appease Cam. I ended up starting a short animation, but after awhile, I wasn't really feeling it that much, plus it was almost curfew, so I decided to go back to my room.

I get to my room and fall into bed. The one good thing about this place is that I still get to listen to music. The first thing I do is turn on my playlist titled; 'favs'. I put it on shuffle and Youth by Troye Sivan plays. In the past, this was a song I would listen to non stop on repeat, but listening to it now here at the school, it simply made me feel upset. I shouldn't let some stupid place make me hate a song, I knew that but I couldn't be helped.

I continued to listen to the song despite how it made me feel. Song after song played and I found myself singing loudly to them. If I was going to be forced to stay here, I might as well enjoy some of my time. When the next song comes on, I get up from my bed, trying not to feel so sad. The song was America's Sweetheart by Elle King, and I couldn't help but want to slowly begin bopping like a total dork in the middle of my room by myself.

Feeling the music more, I began swaying harder and singing to the lyrics;

"No, there ain't nothing that I gotta prove-you think your words will make me black and blue-" I'm swinging around playfully while I sing the words, glad that nobody could see me acting this way. I wouldn't say I was the best singer, but I could sing a little. But that didn't mean I'd want anyone to hear me. A few more lines go by and I continue singing along;

"-You try and change me, you can go to hell-" now I was really feeling the music. I was nodding back and forth feeling myself in the song;

"-cause I don't wanna be nobody else-" 

As the song continued, I belted my heart out singing. I didn't care if my neighbors would hear me at that point. I mean one of them is Lectra so I knew she wouldn't mind too much. As far as my other neighbor goes, as the song goes, you can go to hell. I was going to enjoy myself for tonight, I needed this, bad.

A couple more songs go by fast as I sing along to them, then I hear a knock on my door, making me quickly turn off the music and stay silent. I looked at the clock quickly, and it read 11:30, past curfew, so who could it possibly be at this time? The knocking continued while I just sat there looking at the door simply staring, terrified of who it might be.

After a few second, the knocking picked up and I heard a voice behind it softly saying;

"Issa, it's me, Lectra. I have Wes here too. Let us in before we get caught." I let out a sigh of relief and opened the door as fast as I could to let them inside, then instantly closed the door behind them.

"What the hell-why are you guys here? You could've gotten caught." I say frantically but they seemed cool and collected. Lectra tosses her hand at an angle then laughs at my skittishness and adds;

"Oh c'mon, you think we've never snuck out before? Everyone does it." I stare at the both of them utterly shocked. Wes quickly piped up;

"The guards suck. You can either pay them off or just sneak around them, it isn't very hard." I didn't say anything, I had no words so he just continued;

"You think they're really gonna be awake all night? Guards have to sleep eventually too. The ones that do stay awake, are very lenient." I guess that made a little sense. Didn't seem very professional but then again, nothing happening here was professional at all.

"Now-were you gonna invite us to your little party going on in here? Or better yet, tell us you could sing like an angel?" Lectra was looking at me like I was a unicorn standing in front of her. I had only been in highschool choir, it wasn't like I was that amazing at it. I definitely wasn't worth fangirling over.

"Your voice-I don't even know a good enough way to describe it. Please tell me you also write songs?" I had never thought of it, but there was definitely no way I could. I guess I had written poems many times before. I didn't think I could sing good enough to even consider a career from it.

"No. I didn't know I was any good at singing until literally just now. No one has ever told me." Wes and Lectra both gasp way too overly dramatically. I roll my eyes at them and sit back down on my bed. Lectra follows me onto it while Wes just sits on the floor below us. I easily change the subject, as I was feeling overly praised;

"So, how do you pay off the guards here?" They both awkwardly laugh and just sit there for a minute. This can't be good. Lectra spoke first;

"I'm sure you can put two and two together Iss. We don't have money to give so what else would we give them?" I knew the answer, I just wasn't going to say it aloud. I didn't think I could ever get that desperate to ever do that or anything like it to any guard here. It gave me a bitter taste in my mouth just thinking about.

"Some of them just don't care though. It isn't too bad. Its not like they force you, they give you a warning first, then an offer. Either you go back to your room and never do it again or-" I wave at her signaling to stop talking. I didn't want to hear it. I definitely wouldn't ever be doing that in a million years. Wes suddenly speaks up again, reminding me he was there;

"I never thought I would do it, then I got desperate. Isn't much to do alone in your room after 10. As little female guards as there are, it isn't terrible." Lectra laughs at his statement. 

"Of course it's not bad for you-since you have a little crush on miss perfect." I could detect a little bit of jealousy in Lectras voice. Maybe she liked Wes more than she let on. She noticed how she sounded then laughed it off.

"Who's 'miss perfect'?" Wes looks at me then falls to the floor while clenching his chest like he had just had a heart attack. He then lifts his head back up at me and adds, slightly offended sounding;

"You've heard of Megan Fox-?" I nod; 

"-okay and how bout Gal Gadot-?" I nod yet again;

"-well it makes perfection. That's my girl Claudia." Wes falls back down to the floor and exhales loudly. Lectra chimes in then, sounding more annoyed this time;

"Okay, first of all, she is not your girl. Second, she doesn't look like Megan Fox. Keep dreaming." Wes sits up and looks at her with curious eyes. I sit there awkwardly looking at them. No one says anything so I speak up;

"So, are there any secret spots to sneak off to?" Wes stops looking at Lectra and turns to me, excited looking.

"Um yes. We could go there if you're up for it?" He's now up on his feet jumping around. This guy acted super full of it earlier and now was acting like a 12 year old, it was confusing. Lectra must see me judging him cause she giggles then adds;

"Yeah let's go. Maybe you'll see lover boy. He comes occasionally to keep watch. He's one of the guards on watch sometimes." I knew immediately she meant George. And just like that I no longer wanted to go.

"Um no-that doesn't mean don't go, young lady. You're going, because if you don't how are you supposed to meet any new guys to make him jealous with?" Before I could reject the offer, they were both grabbing me up and dragging me to the door in an instant. They stopped and cracked the door open slightly, checking for guards, then after they knew it was clear, we took off down the hallway.

"Where are we going? Where is it?" I ask out of breath from running. Just as out of breath, Lectra answers me, sounding ready to keel over;

"It's a little place one of my friends showed us. It must've been an old gym room but got boarded up from the basement when they remodeled this place. The basement's like the one place that wasn't really touched much." I felt like I was sneaking out of my parents house as a teenager, which I never actually got to do. My two friends right now are the bad influence I wished I had as a teenager.

We go down the stairs to the basement and immediately go the opposite way of the showers and changing rooms. Down the rest of the hall we pass a fitness center and a noisy laundry room until we finally get to a weird patched up bit at the very end. I look at Lectra and Wes and see they are both wearing their pajamas, while I was stuck with my shirt and jeans I was given days ago. Gross.

They stood by the loose wallpaper hanging against the wall looking at me with big animated eyes, clearly waiting for a reaction. Finally they pull it to the side to reveal a molding wooden door, just as old and nasty looking as the rusted out schoolroom I started out in. I look back at them, unimpressed.

"Wow, a gross wooden door? You shouldn't have."

"Okay, shut your mouth and look-" Lectra struggles to crack it open, but it's enough for me to hear music playing inside. She opens it all the way and I see flashing lights everywhere. It was exactly like a highschool prom in there. The door was weirdly small, like it was straight out of a Alice in Wonderland theme park. We crouch slightly and finally walk in to see a huge gym compared to the small space we just crawled through, making the Alice theme really come to life.

I sit up and immediately see about ten or so others dancing around and enjoying themselves. I know my mouth is wide open with amazement.

"How do you guys get away with this? I mean-wow." This place felt incredibly inappropriate for our situations but I wasn't about to give up a chance to have a good time with my new friends. Lectra grabs me and shakes me up and down then asks with a failed royal accent;

"Care to dance m'lady?" Wes also walks towards me with a outstretched hand trying to motivate me. I smile, roll my eyes and finally give in, then we ran onto the dance floor with the others. The music wasn't too loud to wake up the whole school, but loud enough to just enjoy. Wes, Lectra and I are grinding and dancing with random people I didn't know when I see a group of people in a corner looking very suspicious.

"Hey, what are they doing, guys?" I yell slightly over the music while still dancing. They look over to the group and in unison make 'ooh' sounds, then they were dragging me over to them excitedly. We arrive in the corner and it smelled horrible. I knew exactly what it was.

"Hey Lou! Our friend here wants to try some! You owe me one." Lou looks over from Wes, back at me then hands me a weird pen. I don't take it at first so Wes says;

"Or yah know, never know how it is-" I was never one to give into peer pressure but it wasn't like I'd do it all the time, especially with being here. I take it and suck on it, then immediately start to cough, already hating it. Everyone cheers me on and I do it again, feeling a rush of what felt like adrenaline, this time not coughing, not having as much.

"Woah there, pro. Save some for the rest of us." Lou nudges me and I just about fall over. Wes grabs me and I look up at him and exclaim;

"I feel good." Wes smirks at me then stands me back up and I glance over to see Lectra hitting it too. She walks back over to us and says to me with the happiest grin;

"And now I do too." With a smile back at her, we go back over to the dance floor and start dancing again. I was so hyper aware and could notice everything around me. I look over at Wes and Lectra and see them dancing together again.

"Lovebirds-I need to pee. I'll be right back-" Wes looked confused but nodded my way anyway, so I began walking towards the gross wooden door again for a bathroom. I found myself watching my feet as I walked towards it, not paying attention to where I was really going. I realized I was wobbling so I looked up and ran right into a mans chest.

"Ope-I am so sorry sir. Didn't see you there-" I look up at Georges kind eyes staring me down curiously. I stare at him a little too long until I truly realize who I had bumped into, and I instantly become irritated all over again then find myself flatly stating;

"Well of course it's you." Feeling less buzzed now and instead kind if ill, I make a swerve around him, trying to open the door, but it won't budge. I felt weak and couldn't even really walk. All I wanted was to take a long nap. Maybe even get a big burger after.

"Are you feeling alright?" I plop down on the floor and look at George, annoyed that he was still here. He crouches down next to me and just stares back.

"Is it time for you to care now?" Is all I get out. I lean against the wall and close my eyes, not wanting to look at him. He doesn't say anything, I just feel his hands grabbing me up and him opening the door, leading me out. I walk out and look at him, eyes squinted.

"I can pee all by myself, thank you very much." I don't wait for a response, I just turn and head to the locker room. I get there and the first thing I do is throw up in a sink. Perfect. I hear footsteps and see George running at me. Just perfect.

"What did you have Issabelle?" I tugged at his shirt, not wanting to fall over. I bring myself into his arms and whisper into his ear, suddenly having the giggles;

"That's none of your business." And with that my eyelids get heavy all at once and I pass out in his arms.

•••

I wake up somewhere different. It wasn't my room. I didn't see anyone in there with me either. I was in a large shirt and my underwear underneath a big cozy blanket. I don't remember much besides me dancing with Lectra and Wes in the old gym. Then I remembered I hit that pen and things started to get fuzzy. I seriously can't handle my drugs I guess.

I glanced over at the clock. It was only 1 in the morning. I was in my thoughts when the door turned open. I hid underneath the blanket and stayed dead quiet. The smell of the sheets were familiar, but it didn't stop me from freaking the hell out as I heard the click of the door closing and the footsteps getting closer to me.

"Issa. I know you're awake." I slowly peaked my eyes out of the sheets and saw George standing there, arms crossed, staring at me like a father disappointed with me after sneaking out.

"Why-am I here-?" He walks closer and I shoot up from laying down and ball myself up, turned away from him.

"You don't have to worry, I won't hurt you-you know that." I get out of the position I'm in and glare at him.

"Do I know that? You've been avoiding me all week and acting like I absolutely disgust you." He doesn't say anything, he only stands there watching me, so I continue;

"And what am I wearing?"

"A shirt. You threw up everywhere. You don't have clothes yet, so I had to bring you here for some." I threw up? I could feel my face getting hot.

"So why didn't you just bring me to my room and let me deal with it? You clearly don't care anymore-" George walks towards me fast and then halts to a stop and sighs.

"It's just-we can't be anything. Or whatever that was, anymore. Cam said-" 

"I knew it. Cam got under your skin and now you want him instead, right?" George doesn't answer so I start to get up from his bed, feeling very unwelcomed now.

"Okay, then I'm just gonna go. We don't have anything else to talk about-" George stops me in my way then grabs my shoulders with his hands and pins me back down to the back board of the bed so I can't get up. I just stare up at him, unsure what to do.

"Cam-" George sighs again then let's me go and sits beside me then finally says;

"-Cam doesn't want us to be together. I can't have him hurt you because of that, so I chose to end it myself. I can't have you hurt Issa." My heart sank. So he wasn't really ignoring me because he was a jerk, it was to protect me.

"You can't just let him control you George. He needs you, you bring a lot to the table here."

"Yeah but he doesn't need you. And that's what I care about." I turn toward him and grab his hand. He looks at my hand in his and pulls away like it was poisonous. He gets up from the bed and stands farther away from me. I shake my head and find myself almost yelling back at him;

"I'm not going to let him get his way. I won't have it." He wraps his hands together around his head so his arms were flexing over it, clearly irritated with my stubbornness now.

"You can't stop this Issa. You shouldn't even be here with me. Cam isn't as bad as you think, I'll be fine." This time I stand up and walk in front of him and stare right into his eyes, only now remembering I only had the shirt and underwear on but knew it was too late to turn back.

"Why do you keep defending him?" He simply looks away from me but doesn't say a word.

"Just tell me. Please." He turns back and looks at me, sadness filling his eyes.

"I-knew Cam before I got here." Completely shocked at what George just told me I said;

"Oh. How did you know each other?"

He let out a weird noise, clearly not wanting to say but continued anyway;

"We would stream together all the time, we even lived together. We were pretty big-I mean still are, but that's not the point." I roll my eyes but ignore his bragging. So they were friends even before he got here? Why would Cam treat him so badly then, or better yet, kidnap him? Was he just that obsessed with him?

"Before you ask, no I don't know why he kidnapped me. It doesn't seem like him. I just know he isn't as bad as he's letting on to be. I mean, he isn't even the one who hurt me, that was another guard here. It was just said to scare you away." My head was hurting so much listening to this, but I let him go on.

"I just know there has to be-something, or someone else behind this, besides Cam. He just can't tell me."

"Why didn't you tell me all of this before when I first got here?"

"There wasn't enough time to. I wish I did. I hated seeing you hate me." He then smirks a little and stares me up and down eagerly.

"You trying to make me jealous of that Wes guy down in the shower though, was-" He walks towards me then stops.

"I'm sorry we still can't." His voice was getting shaky now, like he could cry any second.

"Why can't we just-" I stop mid sentence. George waits for me to answer but when I don't he finishes for me;

"Why can't we just, what? Sneak around? Secretly be together? You actually think that would work Issa?" I walk up to him, getting close enough to smell his cologne again.

"Why not? At least it's something. I can't not be with you George. Everything about you draws me in. You can't tell me you don't feel the same for me-" George stops me from talking by grabbing my waste and pulling me up against him, holding the small of my back. We only sit there, noses barely touching, staring at each other as we breathed hard. He still doesn't say anything, he just stares at me, not knowing what to do.

"Just let it happen. Please George." He throws his head back and exhales dramatically. He doesn't move, he just stays there looking at the ceiling, holding back from me. I know the good move would have been to just break away from our embrace, but since we've been together I've wanted him, needed him, so I couldn't just pull away.

Instead I pull his chin slowly down to look deeply into his eyes and kissed him. He thankfully kissed me back, only more passionately than I had, lengthening the short kiss I planted first. George stops briefly then takes a step back and sits on the bed, so I sit too, only facing him on his lap, kissing him again. As I sit on him he exhales through our kiss.

(Took out this small section because of wahoo baboon scene PG 13 BAHAHA haha)

I can feel him move to proceed when there was a knock at the door. He speedily moves back away from me in shock then tosses me a blanket to cover up with. George finally snaps out of it then whispers;

"Crap. Hide in the closet. If I leave, you leave and go back to your room." He kisses me so I nod and slip into the closet. Who could be here at almost 2 at night? I hear George open his door then a male spoke. I couldn't make out who it was, it didn't sound like anyone I knew. I then had a thought that I couldn't help but chuckle at lightly.

George was probably still wearing nothing but his boxers while he talked to the random person.

"Cam wants to speak with you. He's been trying to text you all night." I could hear the awkwardness of the mans voice talking to George, half naked.

"This early in the morning?" George says this short of breath sounding.

"Yes. Now." I hear him turn and leave then George eagerly closed the door firmly. I burst out of the closet ready to faint. George is standing there in only boxers still, like I guessed. I laughed again at him, covering my mouth so I wasn't too loud.

"That was close." George huffed out a breath then replied with a sly smirk;

"Yeah it was. Too bad he came. I almost had you too." He winked and nudged me like I was a regular old buddy. I remembered then that I was standing there wearing only his blanket. I don't know why I was shy now, he had literally just seen me naked. Then I giggled out loud thinking; after what we almost did, I definitely shouldn't be shy now.

"What's so funny?" George says this while looking me up and down amusingly. 

"Oh." He looks away as if he was trying to give me privacy, then suddenly runs at me out of nowhere, immediately trying to rip the blanket off of me. I playfully scream and run around the room trying to get away. George is chasing me for a few seconds until he finally catches me and throws me on the bed. Hes laying over me with my arms pinned down over my head, blanket still draped around the rest of my body.

"What you gonna do now?" George says, getting closer to kiss me. There's a lot of things I wanted to do to him but instead say;

"You should go. That sounded urgent. We can continue this some other time maybe?" He sighs sadly and gets off me.

"You're right. Tomorrow night sound good?" I felt my heart skip a beat. All I wanted to do was grab him and make him stay here with me but I knew better.

"Tomorrow's great." I get up and put on his shirt again. I quickly notice he was watching me, then he loudly groaned out of irritation and finally turned away to get dressed too.

George gets dressed in some khaki shorts and a light blue shirt that had a some video game character on it. I mentally noted that I would have to ask him about that later. 

Before George left the room he turned and kissed me on the forehead. It was a short exchange and soon after I'm left all alone in his room. After carefully checking the hallways to make sure no guards were around, I went back to my room, alone again.

I knew then, with how I was feeling so strongly that George was definitely going to become an issue, good or bad, I had no idea. But I was leaning towards bad if Cam was going to be a problem like I knew he would.

Ugh.