knew I couldn't get up, I wanted to clean myself up before Tae came back. I just couldn't move, the pain was too intense and I was sure I would fall on my face if I left the bed. I closed my eyes and thought of happier times. Kissing in the moonlight our skin prickly from the cold and the new sensations. The wet warmth of our mouths on eachother. A happier time. My happy times were always clouded with sadness. Taking my last breaths to having my first kiss. Losing my mother, having the best time with my mom and dad. My first time with a man, scaring him off. I knew I didn't actually scare Tae off. He had nowhere to go, so he was basically stuck with me anyway.
I hope he wanted to be stuck with me, and wasn't just being nice. I couldn't get those nasty thoughts out of my head. Of course he loved me. Right? Yes. No? Yes. Are you sure? Yes. But why you? Why? You're right. Why me?
I heard someone fiddle with the lock and I was brought back to reality. Within a few minutes Tae had come back with some grocery bag in his hands. By the brand listed on the bag, he must've went to the store I took him too a few days ago. It's about a 10 minute walk. He wasn't gone for more than 20 minutes so he must've ran. Evident by his labored breaths. He set the bags down at the side of the bed. He stripped down to his boxers, and my stupid body wouldn't even allow me a good look as the pains intensified and I clenched my stomach huddling to my knees. Without saying a word he uncovered the blankets from my head careful not to get them in the puddle.
I'm sure they were already ruined, I didn't really care. He pulled the shirt from my head, his pants from my legs, but left his underwear on me. A smart decision, I wouldn't want to ruin the floor too. He scooped me up like a bride, and I felt so small in his arms. We walked to the shower and he sat us both in the tub. That was when he turned on the tub, making sure the water was warm. He then turned on the shower, immediately I was brought back to this morning's bliss. That was when Tae took off my, well his, our underwear.
We hadn't spoken a word to eachother. I trusted him. I knew he wanted to take care of me, so I let him. Our bond deepened even more as he held me in his arms and I was washed clean. My cramps already subsididng by the warm water and his hand gently rubbing the area. My head was cradled in his neck. He rested his head on top of mine. Fuck, I was so happy. How could I ever let him go?
I began to drift, I'm not sure how long we were in the shower but I was so comfortable. Tae had started to move, and I realized he had thoroughly cleaned me of blood. "Rina, will you be okay in here by yourself?" I nodded yes. Why did I nod yes? I didn't want him to go.
Don't go.
He got up and left the shower. He eventually came back and stuck his head in the shower. "How are you doing baby? Are you ready to get out?" I nodded again. Yes. How did I become like this? I'd never felt this submissive ever. It felt great.
He turned off the shower and put a towel around my shoulders. He then wrapped my hair up in a towel. After that he reached down and picked me up and placed me on the toilet once again. I looked over at the 5 different boxes on the counter and he was looking them over. He picked up a box and looked at me, "Have you ever used these?" It was tampons. He continued, "I read the box, and these might be better at stopping the blood if you are comfortable." I had used them before, but wasn't really a fan. I decided I would try again because I didn't want to ruin everything in my house. I grabbed the box and pulled out one. He just stared at me. I looked at him. He continued to stare. "Tae, this is weird please leave me alone for a minute." His eager eyes looked like they wanted to fight back but he reluctantly stepped outside.
I called him in a few minutes later. He was now dressed and holding another pair of his underwear, he began to put an overight pad on. He was going to run out of underwear at this rate I would need to buy him replacements but I couldn't say I minded. I was thoroughly dried, dressed, and period protected. He told me to wait a moment and came back with my comforter. He wrapped me in the blanket and scooped me up into his arms again. "I can walk you know." "No way, you lost too much blood. I'm too worried you'll faint. It's no trouble." I noticed as we walked out of the bathroom that the sheets were changed but he took me to the couch. He had an actual heating pad plugged in.
We decided on something to watch, a shojo anime. Kimi Ni Todoke. I had seen it before, many years ago. Tae had said that a lot of fans had commented about it in one of their music videos and hasn't had the time to watch it. That was when he looked at me, "What language should we watch it in?" I craned my head back to look at him, "I can't read Korean that fast" "I think if I log in to my account, we can watch dubbed in Korean." I nodded. He took the remote, and started the show up. "Here, you need to drink this." I shook my head, "I hate green juice" "I don't care, you need this to replenish your body." I slowly took the bottle. "It was the best thing I could find" I took a sip, and surprisingly it tasted sweet. I snuggled in to Tae and we got lost in episodes of the show. He held me in his arms. Could I be happy? He rubbed my belly. I don't deserve this. I felt his warmth on my back. I can't lose him. He kissed the top of my head. I silently cried.