It was still Easter break, Wednesday. Salma had texted Thomas in the morning and informed him that she and two more of their old friends would be coming over for dinner the very same evening.
"Only she could actually invite herself and other people over for dinner at another person's place", Thomas growled while pacing the living room.
Liv tried not to look amused as she laid sprawled on the sofa, watching him in all his annoyance. The peace between them had been kept all day, probably mostly due to the fact that he was so preoccupied with fretting for the dinner party.
"It'll be fun!", she ensured him, "Don't you miss your old friends?"
Thomas snorted.
"Let's just say I outgrew them a bit. Particularly one of them as you will be able to tell. Come to think of it, do you even want to stick around? I can guarantee you it will be worth missing."
His tone was dry, not hopeful, because he knew better than to carry any hopes of her leaving at this point.
"'Course I do. You know, I've barely ever met any of yours and Arvid's other friends."
"Yeah well, suppose there's a reason for that..."
Night came and Liv stood in front of a mirror in the hallway. She wore one of Thomas's black sweaters and a pair of jeans far too long for her, so she had had to roll them up a bit.
"I look ridiculous", she stated.
For a split second Thomas eyes rested on her but then quickly flicked away.
"You look fine."
He went on pacing. The truth was that the sight of her in his clothes made his stressed, whirling thoughts stop in their tracks. He fought the urge to shake his head in order to get the rush of the hopeless flood of adoration manageable quicker. He picked up the monologue again.
"I just don't want their piddling condolences... Why'd she have to..."
"Hey, hey, it's alright", interrupted Liv muttering, now rolling up the sleeves of the sweater, "I told you, they'll be too busy laughing at me."
He quit pacing again and threw another quick glance at her, regretting his choice to do so immediately. Another punch in the gut.
"Oh trust me they won't be laughing."
It came out of him before he had properly evaluated it, something which never ever happened to him except for when he was around her, he had discovered. Liv just looked confused as Thomas frowned at her, another disturbing train of thought hitting him.
"If you don't want Sebastian breathing down your neck you should keep your hair tied up. He was always crazy about blondes."
Liv frowned right back at him.
"His problem, not mine."
Defiantly she let her hair out and it tumbled down her back. Thomas knew he probably looked immensely pained because he sure felt it.
"Worse for you", he mumbled.
Sebastian arrived first, at the same time as the food. His hair was in a buzz cut now and his broad mouth made him look like a smiley whenever he smiled.
"Sweet Tommy, Chinese!"
Heftily he wrapped his arms around Thomas and hugged him.
"Sorry 'bout your old man and all that."
Thomas grunted something and seemed relieved that that was over with.
"And hello to you! I think I recognise you from somewhere..."
Swiftly he turned his attention to Liv who stood leaning against the door frame.
"It's like Arvid in a wig isn't it?", he looked at Thomas for compliance but just got an unenthusiastic nod. "A positively gorgeous Arvid in a wig that is."
"Well I don't think we're that much alike...", Liv attempted to protest but Sebastian was already walking past her into the house.
A few minutes later Salma arrived with Rasmus, hand in hand. Rasmus actually reminded Liv of Thomas a lot. He seemed quick, clever and somewhat difficult to read, yet perhaps a tad more open, relaxed, which in all honesty was not saying much. Their looks were pretty similar too, Rasmus being just slightly less dark in hair and with hazel coloured eyes instead of dark blue.
"Salma has a type", Liv thought sourly to herself but then felt bad for her resent when Salma hugged her fondly and said "Hi, Livvy!"
They ate and played cards. Somewhere around 8 Sebastian suggested they'd break out the bottles.
"You know, Sebbe, the wine is more than enough", Salma sighed and shook her head, "This is not that kind of night if you hadn't noticed."
Sebastian looked offended.
"Well none for you then. Rasmus, whaddaya say..? Tommy..? Toast for your father?"
"He was an alcoholic, you know", Thomas said in an exceptionally bored tone.
Liv fought back a nervous laugh but Sebastian appeared unbothered by Thomas dry response.
"It's times like this I miss Arvid. He'd never turn down an opportunity like this", he sighed dramatically and then his gaze flicked over to Liv.
"Heyy... You'll drink with me! For big brother's sake. 'Couple of shots?"
"Not a chance in hell", Thomas stated matter of factly, cutting Sebastian off before Liv had even thought of what to answer.
Sebastian clapped his hands over his mouth.
"Shit! Right! You're a minor aren't you? Well... come to think of it... If you are anything like your brother then you've probably had a few... well let's call it samples."
Liv did not know what to say to this, just smiled and glanced insecurely at Thomas.
"Leave her alone", Salma said and then put her arm around Rasmus, "It's getting late. We mustn't bother our hosts all night."
Thomas looked grateful but Sebastian seemed discontent.
"Yeah what's up with that? Arvid's cool with you shacking up with lil sis?"
The air in the room became thick and heavy. Rasmus didn't seem to notice, however, but just put his chin in his hand and watched interestedly.
"I- We're not..."
Thomas seemed at loss for words, shocked, which was a rare sight to say the least.
"I get it", Rasmus spoke, surprisingly enough, "You're like family, no?"
Liv nodded quickly and Thomas got some colour back in his face, apparently immensely relieved.
"I don't buy it. Like another brother?"
Sebastian put on a puzzled face and looked from Thomas to Liv and back again.
"I think we're done here, Sebbe, let's leave before Tommy renounces contact with all of us."
Rasmus was already standing up saying this, putting the board game pieces back inside the box.
"Fine fine", Sebastian muttered.
It was first after all three of them had left that Liv found the slip of paper upside down, right where she had sat, on the kitchen table.
"Since neither one of your brothers seem to mind", it read and a phone number followed. Her heart started to beat faster and she hastily made the decision to just leave it, written side up, on the table. Of course she knew he would find it, surely even within the hour, for she also knew Thomas was the kind of person to never fall asleep with the kitchen table cluttered. Another trait inherited from his father, or perhaps instilled by his father.
It was like a game, a test, to see if he cared, if only just a little. Anything would be a breath of fresh air in comparison to the apathy, the desperate assuring that they were not "shacking up" and the nauseous face he had made at this suggestion.
For half an hour she lied under the covers on the couch, heart continuously pounding, before Thomas approached from out of the kitchen. Weirdly enough he moved almost soundlessly, snuck up next to her and just put the note on the table beside the couch. Taking a few seconds to process this unexpected behaviour she then swallowed her pride, fake-yawned and tried to make her voice sound confused and drowsy.
"What?"
"Sorry, nothing. Go back to sleep", he whispered.
She could see his outline in the dark.
Another moment of processing.
"No, what is it?"
He sighed lightly.
"Someone left a little something for you."
Liv sat up and fumbled for the note, turned on the light and pretended she read it for the first time.
"For me? Did Sebastian..?"
"Not Sebastian. Trust me, he can't write like that. Rasmus."
Now she did not have to fake her surprise.
"Rasmus? But he... he's with Salma."
"Oh they're not very serious", he said casually.
"Right", Liv muttered, "That's why you and her... So you can get together?"
"We don't get together. But yes, they have an open thing like that. Are we done here?"
Thomas started to walk out of the room.
"Hey, wait. Is that it?"
He stopped but did not turn around.
"Is what it?"
"You're just gonna pimp me out like that."
She did not realise what she had really said until she saw the look on his face when he briskly turned back around.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing, sorry... I..."
"What are you looking for here, Liv? Do you want me to call Arvid home and get the pitchforks so we can chase after him? Why'd you try and make this more complicated than it has to be?"
"I don't! I just...", she realised she did not have anything to say, lowered her eyes.
"Go out with him", Thomas shrugged, "Or don't. It's like he said. Neither one of your brothers mind, or care for that matter."
With this he left her feeling stunned and numb all throughout her body. Without thinking properly she reached for her phone, typed in the number and wrote:
Hi it's Liv. Could you pick me up after practice tomorrow night?