"I'm home," I called out to my dad quickly closing my front door behind me. I breathed a sigh of relief at my freedom from drunk Vincenzo. How could he say all that then end up holding me all night? Did the fact that I might like guys that distressing to him? And what the hell was that about him doing bad things so I can always run to him?
Does he think I'm that easy?
I took out my phone and quickly dialed Ashton. It took a bit but he picked up on the last ring. ""Dan...Morning. It's...4am, are you ok?""
Fuck, I forgot the time! I was just extremely freaked out and had to sneak out as soon as I could wiggle out of Vincenzo's grip. I ran home so fast that I forgot that it was still dark outside.
"I'm sorry," I apologized instantly feeling bad.
""No, don't apologize, it's fine, what's up?"" Ashton grumbled. Geez, how nice for a guy who's grumpy in the morning.
"Vincenzo found out that I do like guys and then he started being weird," I said into the phone. I elaborated what had happen from the time I got home until now in detail. I could remember everything he said to me because it was so weird that he was suddenly acting like this. "He even said he acts up so I'll come running to him. Who the fuck does that guy think he is to think I'm that easy to manipulate....omitting the past couple years!"
""He said that to you?"" Ashton sounded a bit dangerous as he said this. ""You said he hugged you all night?""
"It was only until he fell asleep," I clarified. "Like a couple hours! I'm not sure why he suddenly started being like that."
""I'm on my way to you now,"" Ashton hung up the phone. Why was he coming over all of a sudden? Did I just unintentionally start a fight by telling him what happened? Who would even win that battle before a bloodbath happened? Maybe I should've stayed silent about it.
Though I can't deny....the thought of them fighting was intriguing to me. Ashton's farm boy muscles vs Vincenzo's....six pack. Oh man, I'm thinking about his well toned body again! Did Ashton look like that as well? Better? Now I'm thinking about Ashton's well toned body!
God, not Ashton too! This was really gay of me!
I heard a knock on the front door and I ran to it to let Ashton in out of the cold, eager to ask what was going on. He huffed and made his way inside and straight to my room without a word to me. Is he getting ready to beat Vincenzo up?
I followed him to my room and shut my door. "Ash, are you-"
"Did he do anything else to you?" Ashton asked turning to face me. He looked completely serious about this question and I wasn't exactly sure what he could have meant. What would Vincenzo do to me?
I lowered my head to think. It was at this moment that I noticed that he was in footie pajamas that were designed to look like a sheriff. It even had a badge and cowboy boots, so, of course, I couldn't hold back my laughter.
"Your pajamas are....interesting," I tried to hold my laughs back but failed. He looked like a giant child. Once again, without even trying, he's boosted my mood. Ashton blushed and looked at his attire.
"Just ignore it!"
"But it's so cute, Sheriff Belle!" I chuckled much to Ashton's embarrassment. He's so good at what he does, whatever it is he did. "How many bad guys did you catch at the saloon?! Where's your gun holster?!"
"You shut up!" Ashton went red and pinched my cheeks gently until I calmed down from my fit of laughter. He just had a way of making me feel more at ease. "Now, that you've got your morning dose of comedy at my expense, answer my question. Did he do anything else to you?"
"Like what?"
"Did he touch you?"
"You have to touch people to hold them, Ashton. All he did was hug me and say a bunch of weird shit," I told him. "He said he wasn't drunk, but I think he was. I'm not sure why he would touch me any other way."
Ashton sighed and lay down on my bed with his arms open. "Come lay down with me too then." I went over to him and lay down next to him as I was told. Ashton snaked his arms around me and pulled me really close to him.
"Am I comfortable or something?" Why were people suddenly interested in using me as a body pillow?
"Is this how Vincenzo held you?" Ashton asked.
"No, it was a bit more close," i said. Ashton turned me towards him and pressed our bodies together. I was suddenly super aware of Ashton's big hands on my waist and his breath on my face. "N-not this close, but close enough."
"Oh, well then let's get some sleep. I'm really really tired anyway," Ashton yawned. I tried to move but Ashton held me firmly in place. "You woke me up so at least let me do it too."
"But why?"
"Because I can do it better," Ashton grabbed a handful of my ass causing me to yelp. He let go after he was satisfied with my reaction to him and adjusted himself so it was more comfortable for me to lay on him. "How did you feel when he held you?"
"Why would I feel something?"
"Um, you liked him for so long."
"I think I was too distracted because he wasn't wearing a shirt. I wasn't really expecting to see what I saw, so I was seriously distracted," I admitted. "But, other than that, I was really focused on him acting weird. It may have been a panic attack."
Ashton sat up quickly and zipped his onesie down. I couldn't help but stare as he slipped his muscular arms out and exposed the big perfectly brawny muscled body of a pro wrestler showing off their well defined six pack. His biceps alone were about the size of my head. Every little movement seemed to flex a different muscle on him. I think I was too distracted by emotion last time to really appreciate the sight in front of me.
Oh wow! This was next level shit! I hope I'm not drooling.
"I guess you do get distracted easily," Ashton seemed pleased with something. This is a farmers body? Hot Damn, it looks even better coupled with his slicked back blond hair. "Is this your first time seeing people half naked?"
"Pretty much. The locker rooms are full of dust so I don't go in there and I don't do gym class, so I've never had a chance to see anything before or focus on it. How'd you get so big?" I reached out my hand to touch his washboard abs and almost died of excitement when I did.
"I'm naturally a big guy like my dad. Farming built the foundation and wrestling just tones me up," Ashton flexed for me and I couldn't help but admire him some more in jealous awe. Ashton was really really hot! What I wouldn't give to look like this myself instead of a sickly guy.
"I want to look like that, but I can't run far because of the asthma, and the guys wrestling will break me half before I even start," I whined. "I want to grow too."
"You might-"
"Shut up, don't patronize me! I'm little and you know that," I pouted and turned my head. "I'll never be seven feet tall like you."
"I'm actually 6'5 but I understand your frustration. I always wished I was a more normal size, then people wouldn't think I'm scary looking." Ashton told me. "I always have to duck before entering rooms and finding nice clothes that don't have to be tailored can be awfully exhausting. I'd also like to walk around and not be gawked at like some circus freak."
"But aren't they just staring because you're the ideal type of man? And I think the biggest reason people are scared of your face is because you look like the handsome mob boss from comic books. Fierce and deadly but really hot. Plus you're super tall and it looks like you build muscle nicely," I said.
"Handsome? Hot? I didn't scare you at first? You tried to avoid me like the plague."
"That's because you said you were Vincenzo's friend," I quickly explained. "I'm not afraid of anything, but it didn't hurt to be cautious back then. You're not scary to me at all."
"I guess I did try to stick to you pretty quickly, it's my fault for being so pushy," Ashton started to turn red. Before I could ask him if he was getting a fever, he pulled me back into our previous position and...I think he was smelling me. But that didn't matter to me. All I could focus on was the rock hard Adonis I was pressed up against right now. Oh my god it felt too good to be true. "But in the end, I'm better."
"Better?"
"Better than that guy," Ashton gave me a happy squeeze. Better than Vincenzo? What kind of pissing contest we're these two having? They both kept mentioning the other as if there was something wrong. "Let's get some sleep now."
Ashton took a deep breath and closed his eyes, so I resigned myself to being held by him and closed mine too. Ashton felt extremely warm and comfortable and I think he smelled a bit like freshly cut grass. He yawned and made it obvious that he was snuggling up to me as much as he could.
Honestly it made me feel safe.
When I woke up later, I wanted to turn my body but I found it a bit difficult to do. I pondered over the reasons why I couldn't move before I realized that I was laying on top of a huge warm body and muscular arms were wrapped around me, holding me in place. I opened my eyes to see a well defined chest. I lifted my head and met Ashton's handsome face.
Oh shit! I quickly fell asleep on top of a shirtless man last night and I really didn't mind it at all. Ashton was seriously warm and felt just like my bed, even though he was a solid rock. Falling asleep in his arms felt like I was in a safe space, a cocoon.
As if he had felt me freaking out, Ashton opened his eyes and tightened his grip around my waist briefly. Our faces immediately came much much closer to the other and I was forced to face Ashton's smiling tired face. "Good morning, Dan."
"Morning," I dryly responded remembering again that I had somehow fallen asleep on this really buff guy under weird circumstances. Ashton chuckled and hugged me a bit more tightly. "This bed is actually pretty great to sleep on. I slept like a baby, how about you?"
I did sleep better than usual in all honesty, whereas I couldn't fall asleep at all with Vincenzo around. I'm not sure of the last time I had slept so peacefully. Knowing this I couldn't stop my blush from creeping up. "I slept really well."
"I like that you're really honest with me," Ashton covered up his own blushing face.
"It's good to be truthful, why would I lie to you?"
"You couldn't sleep before, so I'm guessing we're late for school," he grumbled. "My uniform is in the car so I'll grab it in a few. Just let me get a few more minutes."
"It's Saturday, there's no school, silly." I told him. "Are you hungry? If you let go, I can make up some food for us. Though I think my dad already made something."
"Ah, man, I don't want to let go...." Ashton stretched before sitting us both up and giving me a long hug. During which, his stomach growled loudly. "Yeah, let's get some food to eat."
He released me and, after zipping his onesie back up, he followed my lead to the kitchen where, to my surprise, Vincenzo was eating a plate of food. I stopped to wonder just what the hell he was doing here after acting all weird like he was. At least he had his shirt on this time. He turned around to look at me with a smile but stopped suddenly and frowned as I assume he spotted Ashton.
"What the hell is he doing here?" Vincenzo snapped. Did these two have a fight I wasn't aware of or something? The hostility between the two seemed to be at an all time high, but I've never seen them fight before. "Why was he in your room?"
"We were sleeping," Ashton stepped in front of me. Vincenzo got up from the table and walked right up to look Ashton in the eye. The height difference of five inches didn't seem so big as they stared each other down suddenly.
"Did I ask you?"
"You didn't make anything clear."
"Um, is there extra food?" I asked trying to break the tension filling the room. "I just woke up and I wanna eat!"
"It's set up for you already, I made you a plate," Vincenzo told me.
"Oh, well you can have that, Ashton, I'll make another plate too-"
"Why would you do that? I made you a plate! Tell him to leave so we can eat!" Vincenzo made a grab for my arm but was blocked by Ashton. "Get out of my way!"
"Calm down," Ashton warned him.
"He's a guest, Vincenzo. It would be rude not to feed him after he slept over," I stood strong on this. I wasn't going to just kick Ashton out because he told me too so, even if past me would've. "I'm not kicking him out on an empty stomach! Where are your manners?"
Vincenzo went back to his seat but not silently. "The man with a black hole for a stomach is just going to eat everything in your fridge. I don't like him being here."
"That's not up to you," Ashton say across from Vincenzo and the two stared at each other unpleasantly as I fixed myself my own plate. These two were seriously too much in the morning to handle. How could they be acting up with each other on sight.
"Did you guys have a fight or something?" I asked finally sitting down with my own food and digging in.
"No," Ashton answered.
"What's with the hostility then?" I asked. "Aren't you guys friends?"
"I thought we were," Vincenzo mumbled. "But now I just see a big annoying guy who eats and talks too much shit in front of me."
"And I just see a fake immature brat throwing a tantrum because he can't have what he wants," Ashton retorted cutting up his omelette. "It's not exactly nice being around you either, Vinny."
"Why be so judgmental about it when you were the one who wanted to hang out with me? You suddenly stopped being a scared bitch too, that means you're finally over being such a pathetic-"
"Vincenzo!" I snapped. I wasn't sure about what he was going to say next, but I knew it was going to be extremely harsh. Why was Vincenzo being such an asshole to Ashton like this? I've never known him to do anything for petty reasons like that to anyone but me. "Can you just be nice?"
"Why are you sticking up for him? Tell him to shut up!" Vincenzo looked extremely pissed. He looked at me as if I was supposed to change my mind, but I've gotten used to his intimidation tactics long ago. Vincenzo just wasn't a scary person like some people made him out to be.
"I'm telling you because you started it," I pointed out. "Be nice or shut up."
"You're going against me for him? You don't even know him at all, Danny! You know how paranoid I had to be around him? Do you not see that he has hidden intentions towards you? He's gay!" Vincenzo looked as if I had killed his first born.
"I know that he's gay, he doesn't try to hide it," I defended. "I don't see how his sexuality is your business anyway. How does Ashton being gay effect you? It doesn't! So shut up and eat."
"I'm just warning you to be careful."
"We already slept in the same bed," I said feeling like I made my point. "Ashton takes good care of me. There's nothing to watch out for."
"Then what about his sketchy looking family!"
"Vincenzo!"
"His parents don't even look like him! It's like three strangers when you look at them! The vibe is weird and it's not a normal family!" Vincenzo snapped.
"Those are my parents. They're far from sketchy." Ashton finally spoke up. When I saw him I could immediately tell how angry he actually was. He balled his fists up and kept eating as if to stop himself from going off.
"Vincenzo, maybe you just should go home. I just want to eat in peace without you harassing my guest. I don't need warnings and it just feels like you're throwing another tantrum." I sighed.
"Fine, I'll stop. But I'm staying," Vincenzo pouted. Suddenly I felt like a total dummy. He's doing this on purpose to keep my attention off of Ashton. He's acting out so he can know that someone cares enough about him.
Geez, why did I have to understand this guy of all people? He was just as insecure about being alone as I noticed Ashton was. Are all handsome guys insecure and lonely or do I attract insecure lonely handsome guys?
Hopefully it's the latter.
"Stop pouting, i apologize," Vincenzo rolled his eyes at Ashton. It sounded pretty genuine actually. Ashton was almost as shocked as I was.
"You should accept it, it's the best he knows how to apologize Ashton," I said.
"I really don't care what he says about me. Don't cross the line though," Ashton warned.
"Or what? You'll lock me up? Sheriff? I can't take you seriously in those pajamas," Vincenzo shrugged. I couldn't help but smile as I tried my hardest not to let out my laughs.
"You wish you could pull this off like I do," Ashton picked up all the empty plates on the table. When did he realize that I had finished eating? "I'll help you wash dishes."
"I'll be here," Vincenzo made his way into the living room to watch TV.
"I hope you aren't too upset," I told Ashton as we started to wash our dishes. "I didn't know he would be here."
"It's fine. It's not the first time I've heard that about my family. My parents don't look like me because they're my aunt and uncle. The only way they look like me is in height and size." Ashton explained.
"Want to tell me about it?" I asked.
"There's nothing I can't tell you," Ashton said with a gentle tone. "Just don't mention it to anyone else. My parents got married right out of high school and were very happy with each other. It's everyone's dream to get out of farm-ville after all. They didn't want any kids really."
This seems to be a huge painful thing he's about to tell me by the look on his face, but he sounded calm as he narrated his story.
When his mother was young, she relentlessly perused her career as a criminal attorney and his father was focused on building his steady growing financial accounting business. They had been married for five years at that point and never considered having any children. To them, a child would slow down the progress they were rapidly attaining. Plus they didn't like the Clifton from other families, so naturally they didn't want it.
But both sets of grandparents back at the farm started to try and meddle as they thought it was time for grandchildren. Since they didn't have anything else to worry about, they started to pour the pressure on his mom and dad.
Every time they went to visit their family, they had intense arguments and for a long time they couldn't make peace as all the grandparents blamed his mother. One of the grandparents suggested that they have a child and leave it to them to raise. That way they'll have company as they age and his parents can focus on their careers. With that in mind, they came to a mutual agreement.
After the discussion she became pregnant shortly after with Ashton. The grandparents were happy with the outcome and started to plan, but Ashton's mother became very sick. Even through her sickness, she continued to work very hard as her mind was solely on the company her and her husband had created. In her mind her real baby was the company, not the comfort tool for her parents.
After nine months she had a natural birth. The second day, like she had promised, she put Ashton in the care of his grandparents and left to go back to work. They had expected his parents to come visit Ashton but years went by without so much as a phone call.
As the grandparents complained to their kids, they were always shut down with "you guys got what you wanted, so why are you complaining?" It wasn't clear what the grandparents were thinking but when Ashton turned two, and the first grandparent had died, Ashton was handed over to his aunt and uncle who were unfortunate in having children.
"I've met them a few times but I don't really care about them. My aunt and uncle are my parents as they always have been." Ashton ended his story. "For some time I thought: If I could turn back time to twenty years ago, I wish they never would've met. That way I wouldn't have been born. I used to think I never wanted to be a part of this world just to be abandoned like a piece of trash that doesn't belong. But I've gotten therapy for that."
I was a bit shocked to learn of his past. How could two people be so ruthless towards their own kid like that. The entire family was irresponsible.
That explains why Ashton was so timid and had no confidence.
"Well, I'm glad you have your aunt and uncle. Our stories are somewhat similar. My mom also split on me. I don't care much about her either." I said not knowing what else to say. I wasn't really sure how to show pity to him appropriately.
"It's fine, I don't know what to say when you get sick, just be normal," Ashton told me. I wondered why he felt that way? He always knew what he should and shouldn't say. "How about you come watch me at practice today?"
"I'd love too!" I gleamed at him. I was pretty excited at the thought of browsing the merchandise now that I was getting over my crush on Vincenzo. If Ashton was this buff, how buff was everyone else on the wrestling team? It's been a while since I've been able to perv out like that.
"Let's start getting ready, we have to be there around three," Ashton washed the last dish in the sink and I grabbed a towel to dry his hands myself.
"Let me get rid of Vincenzo then," I sighed. This was going to be a bitch and a half.
I went to the living room and stood in front of Vincenzo who was lost in his phone. "Need something?"
"I have something to do," I told him. "I'll hang out with you later."
"I thought we could hang out today."
"We didn't make any plans. I'm going to do something, so come back later," I repeated. "I'll have time then."
"What are you going to do?"
"Watch wrestling practice."
"Fine, I'll do what you say, even though I'm being ditched for those muscle dicks. Forgive my attitude, I've just quit smoking." Vincenzo pouted. This guy could throw a tantrum and still be incredibly cute. What an asshole! "I'll be back later. Just don't get too close with the Sheriff."
"Stop it, I forgive you," I chuckled. Vincenzo stood up and wrapped me up in a long tight hug and rubbed my back before leaving my home. I don't know what I was dreading before. He's in the process of changing, but he's changing.
At least he quit cigarettes.
I returned to my room to change along with Ashton and then he drove us both to school. Ashton led me to the school gym, which smelled deeply like sweat and musk, and let me sit with his school bag before he rushed into the locker room to change.
For about ten minutes, I sat in silence on my own. It was kinda peaceful in here I guess.
"Daniel? What are you doing here?" I heard someone ask to my right. The football teams coach and another guy, who I assumed was the wrestling coach, walked up to me.
"I'm here to watch Ashton practice," I understood his apprehensiveness towards me. The top students never took a gym class in their life, let alone take an interest in sports, so why would I be here? Definitely not for the sport, but I wasn't going to tell them that. Two by two the boys finally started to file out of the locker room. At the back, straggling, was Ashton.
It was ridiculous how Ashton put all these other boy's bodies to shame. He had the biggest muscles, he was the tallest, he was the biggest and he looked the best, even in head gear.
He even had the biggest bulge.
The Coach blew his whistle and the boys started warming up together. But they seemed like they were purposefully shutting Ashton out. He was always far from the group in every step defining a clear separation in the team.
After a while they brought out some mats and started to do one on one matches. All of them ranged from pathetic displays to fairly even matches, that was, until it was Ashton's turn. Only a few could barely keep up with him, but due to size and a gap in strength, they all lost to him.
On their first rest break, Ashton ran straight to me excitedly. "How am I doing out there?"
"Are you kidding?! You look so cool!" I handed him his bottle of water and stared at Ashton in his sweaty glory. "It's nice to watch you do this! It's all so primal!"
"At least someone thinks so," Ashton chuckled at my excitement.
"You can really see the gap between you and everyone else. Anyone can tell that you're the ace of the team."
"Not everyone is happy about that."
"I see that, but you don't care what people think."
"As long as they don't say it to my face. The silent treatment doesn't feel so bad anymore anyway," Ashton smiled. When we both looked back at the rest of the team, they seemed to be talking about Ashton as every few seconds, one of them looked towards us curiously.
"Ignore them. They're obviously jealous that you're so good!" I told him. "Who wouldn't be jealous of that bulge?" That was not supposed to come out of my mouth!
"Well, that's certainly true," Ashton proudly said.
"Exactly, you're the whole package deal, so do your best! I'm rooting for you." I said just as the coach blew his whistle again. I couldn't take my eyes off Ashton for the next two hours.
He literally transformed from a puppy to a sexy gangster looking guy when he wrestled, and he did what he did with such passion. I could really tell that he loved what he was doing by the way that he did it and watching him move around in a tight unitard was aesthetically pleasing to the eye.
Occasionally Ashton would look towards the bench and wave at me. He really kept getting cuter by the day, which made me happy that I was getting to know him more. His smile is really cute as well, his lips look really soft, I wonder if he takes special care of them. Seeing such a cute face makes me really want to see his other expressions.
Something about him made him alluring to me. Ashton oozed dominance and innocence. It was so sexy that it could be considered taboo. I know he could completely dominate me if he wanted to. If he wanted to, he could put a collar on me, or tie my hands up with his uniform and give me spankings or something even better. Would he be a gentle or rough lover? I could imagine trembling under his big body while his big-
Calm down, Danny! When was the last time you even had one of those kinda fantasies?! Freshman year? And it was just some hardcore shit with Vincenzo, now I'm imagining Ashton doing it?
Why did I want to be eaten up so badly?
What if it was with both?
I quickly had to distract myself from the vivid threesome scenario I created in my head about being completely dominated by the two at the same time before my body reacted. Thinking about sex for the first time in three years felt a bit jarring because now I just wanted to go home and rub one out, which I also haven't done since freshman year. Maybe I was feeling that desperation to lose my virginity like everyone else was.
Or maybe it was because I was watching muscular men fight and roll around.
"Danny!" Ashton appeared beside me suddenly and put his hand on my forehead. "You look a bit red."
"Probably because of your muscles," I blurted out. Fuck my life! "I mean....I'm getting a bit hot. That's all."
"Y-you must be reacting to the stuffy atmosphere. I'll go shower and change so we can go," Ashton said taking his water bottle from me. "I'll be right back."
After I had finished singing the national anthem for the 5th time to calm myself down, I made my way towards the locker room doors. My intentions are to only get a quick peek at the muscular boys changing, now that Ashton's muscles weren't there to distract me anymore.
"...with Hospice Boy?" I heard someone ask.
"His name is Danny. Why are you asking about him?" I heard Ashton chime in. Why were they talking about me? Is it perverted stuff?
"Why'd you bring him to our practice?"
"Because it's not against the rules." Ashton told them flatly. I didn't dare to try and sneak closer for fear of being seen. This sucks, I barely got in the door.
"Why would you bring that loser here? We're trying to look out for your reputation bro-"
"Who are you calling bro? We've never been bros. I've never been bros with anyone on this team or in this school. I don't see why I need you guys to help my judgement now," Ashton shut everyone down. I could feel the tension rising in the air.
"Hospice boy-"
"Call him that in front of me again and I'll put you down." The silence that lingered spoke volumes. Even if Ashton wasn't liked, no one would dare go against him. "He's not a loser and his name is Danny."
"Are you two actually dating?" Someone asked.
"No, but soon I will be," Ashton said followed by a series of shocked gasps and whispers. "If you guys don't like it, send your complaints to my ass. If you have a problem with him, you have a problem me. Bully him, and I'll kill you. That's all I have to say about that."
"Dude, why are you acting like that? You've been unapproachable with us since day one, always staring us down like some kind of gangster! We're supposed to be a team!"
"Then act like a team and don't try to criticize who I like."
"Dude-"
"Stop acting like we're close friends or something. I don't know why you're acting friendly now. We've never been a team. I've never done anything to warrant anyone questioning me as I've never questioned anyone here, so I don't get what your problem is?"
"You're going to ruin our team image even more!" Someone snapped. How could anyone say that? Ashton was obviously the teams best player. "Everyone already knows you're a thug so-"
"Then I quit, since I'm the only problem on the team and ruining your precious reputations, I may as well remove myself," the locker room erupted into protest. "I'll let coach know that I won't be wrestling anymore, since my life choices effect my teammates so much."
I quietly exited the locker room feeling like I had just seen a death of a main character. Like in Squid games during the Marbles episode. I wanted to cry, but I wanted to dance around in circles from anticipation.
Someone has a crush on me for once! Someone said they wanted to date me and he was already out and proud. Ashton really just said all of that to his teammates without hesitation!
Is this how other people feel when they're liked by someone? Do I keep quiet until Ashton asks me out himself or should I just do it? Do I even like Ashton in that way?
I mean Ashton did come into my life and immediately brighten it up when I was at my lowest. He always came to my house if I needed it, consoled me if I ever felt sad and consistently had my back since I met him. His huge muscles and gentle personality also gave him a lot of brownie points...not to mention that face he had. But I've only ever looked at him as a good friend.
I can't say that I wasn't sexually attracted to him, but dating? Of course it would be different from having a good friend, but how different would it be? And he deserves someone so much better and healthier.
Why would he like a sickly burden like me?
"Dan!" Ashton was walking towards me as he exited the locker room. "Do you have any plans after this?"
"No," I shook my head ignoring the other wrestler's eavesdropping on our conversation. They all seemed to be staring us down as if they had to see our interaction with their own eyes to believe it. "Want to hang out more?"
"Let's go to your house," Ashton put his arm around my shoulders and started to walk me away from the attention. I could feel my face heat up because I could hear the implication everyone else heard.
Ashton's coming over, and I'm starting to get really self conscious about it now. Not because he made me nervous, in fact I felt more relaxed around him, but because I knew I still like Vincenzo to some degree. Anything I responded to now would just be a rebound from him, right? That wouldn't be the right way to do my first relationship.
So if he confesses anytime soon, I have to reject him because I'm not sure how long it will take me to get over Vincenzo. Maybe I would lose my friend this way if I did that though.
But if Ashton really liked me, because of everything I told him, has he been holding his feelings back?
"Do you have anything to tell me?" I asked.
"Nothing at the moment," Ashton was acting like his usual self. He looked like he was about to say something important before shaking his head. "How are you feeling? Did something happen?"
Ashton wasn't a dummy, so maybe because he knew I liked Vincenzo, he did something like hole up his feelings. "You don't have to hold anything back."
"Well, I might be quitting the team. I don't feel like I'm a part of one anyway." Ashton sighed. "They all treated me like a ghost for years and act up suddenly when I bring a friend to watch me."
"Oh," I said. I shouldn't pry anymore. Relax, Dan, he'll tell you when he wants to. Right now we're good friends and it's good how it is. "Well if you like wrestling you should do it, if you don't, then quit. If you need support, I'll support you!"
Ashton gave me a smile. "Thanks for that." He ruffled my hair as usual and opened his car door. When we climbed in, I noticed that he was staring at me intensely before he grabbed one of my hands. "Where's your usual precious smile? Are you hungry? Your hands have gotten really cold as well, should I get us some drinks? Hot chocolate?"
What the fuck was all this? I feel so shocked at the sudden affection, but thinking back, Ashton has always been affectionate with me, but I started it. I wanted him to hold me the night I was crying, we cuddled to sleep, he always has an arm around me and touches my face whenever he can anyway.
Ashton took off his jacket and covered me up with it. "I'll take the hot chocolate." I said. This is what the comics called a gap in personality, right? I kind of want to see a more serious Ashton.
Ashton had already pulled into a parking lot without me noticing. When had he stopped driving? I'm losing my sense of time with this guy again. I keep freaking myself out!
"-with me?"
"What?!" I asked. Did he just-
"Want to go inside with me?" Ashton repeated. "I can leave you here with the heat on if you're feeling tired. You look a bit exhausted."
"I'm-"
"Your skin was hotter than normal when I grabbed your hand. You've been looking better but you still need to take care of yourself," Ashton took a tissue from his glove box and wiped my nose.
"No! I want to go too." I insisted while slipping Ashton's oversized jacket on me. It was a bit heavy on my shoulders and it swallowed me whole. I looked like a baby in his dads shirt! "It's just a small fever, i get like this at least once every two weeks. It hasn't been bad lately either."
"Fine, I won't argue," Ashton got out of the car and quickly ran around to open my door for me. This guy is treating me like a lady....though I'm not all that opposed to being spoiled, I'm felt like I was getting a royal treatment.
I got out of the car slowly as to not trigger my dizziness. It was a little bit of walking Dan, why are your legs turning to jelly with every step you take.
"It's the jacket, too heavy," I explained when Ashton gave me a knowing look.
"Sure," he closed the passenger door and scooped me up into that princess hold he liked so much. "You're not sick but you're not stable either. Just let me get you to the booth."
"You're too much," I mumbled but allowed him to carry me into the cafe. Thankfully it was mostly empty so we didn't attract much attention. Ashton put my down in a booth before going to order the hot chocolate.
"What was that?" Someone asked. I yelped and turned around to see Vincenzo and Sam Kim. Sam Kim was actually a pretty quiet kid that never participated in any bullying and flew mostly off the radar.
"I'm...um, I was cold," I stupidly said.
"So he carried you into the cafe?" Vincenzo crossed his arms. Why did I feel like I was getting scolded by my dad? He didn't have to make me feel guilty for not having a lot of strength! "Why are you here with him?"
"His practice just ended."
"You really went to his practice? Guys only bring the girlfriends to practice so they can show off," Sam blurted out. "No wonder everyone keeps getting the wrong idea. Or are they?"
"Um, what?" I wasn't sure what I should say at this moment. Ashton brought me to practice to show me off? Why would he want to show someone like me off?
"Shut up, Sam. I told you they aren't dating," Vincenzo shot him a quick glare. "I clearly told you to keep your distance from him."
"That's weird, because you clearly aren't my dad," I rebutted immediately shutting Vincenzo up.
"Look at his car, is he really not from the underworld? I've never seen a farmer drive something like that," Sam said.
"Ashton is not a thug, he's just a big guy," I defended.
"Ohh, that what he said," Sam chuckled. I couldn't help but laugh along with him. He didn't seem hostile in his speech, he just liked to talk too much.
"What a surprise," Ashton said obviously hiding his irritation. "I got the hot chocolate, Dan. Are you feeling alright?"
"Yes," I tried my hardest to ignore the tension rising in the air between Vincenzo and Ashton. I took the hot chocolate in both hands and enjoyed the smell of it. "Smells nice."
"You're sick?" Vincenzo asked.
"No."
"Text me when you're done with your friend then, I need to speak to you," Vincenzo told me. I nodded and watched him walk away with Sam in tow. Guess he and Martin really are done now.
Ashton and I enjoyed our hot chocolates in relative peace before returning to my house to watch TV. As usual, dad wasn't home yet which kind of made me nervous.
Ashton had made some popcorn and was sat closer to me than usual. "What did Vincenzo tell you when I was getting our drinks?"
"The usual. He keeps telling you to stay away from you."
"Am I getting in the way?"
"Nonsense, how could I feel like you're in the way of anything? Don't you know how much I like having you around?"
"But you still like Vincenzo-"
"It's not like that! The likes between you two are completely different!" I said.
Ashton turned from the TV and focused his eyes on me. He looked a bit angrier than usual. "Tell me the difference then."
How should I explain it? I'm sexually attracted to both of them but I only like them both as close friends. Maybe Ashton a bit more? How do I say something like that?
Ashton won't be disgusted by my thinking. "I guess, I just wanted to have someone closer to me than Vincenzo." Fuck, that sounded awful.
"So, you only became my friend to make Vincenzo jealous?" Ashton asked. His blue eyes felt like they were staring deep into my soul. He looked angry but above all, he looked hurt. "Did you two sort everything out with each other or something? Seeing how you two are going to be texting later, did you confess or something?"
"No, Vincenzo and I are only friends."
"You like him and only became friends with him? Right, so you and that asshole are just the best of friends now, so what about me? Just some loser farm boy you got acquainted with because you were lonely, is that it?" Ashton was speaking in a monotone voice but I could feel the anger rising up in him. What was Ashton thinking right now?
"I really didn't mean it like that! Ashton I do like you too!"
"Then let me replace him!"
"What?!"
"I went through 17 years by myself without one single friend. Now I finally get one and you tell me I was only being used? You know how shitty this feels? Even if it's like that, i still don't want to let go of you, and I don't want to be mean to you, so let me replace him. I'm not joking, I'm always there for you when you need me, do just you see me as pathetic?" Ashton inched closer to me.
"Not at all," in fact, the only thing I was starting to notice was the mood changing from angry to....sexy? What was happening? Why was Ashton seriously close to my face.
"You know, it's getting tiring competing with Vincenzo for your attention even though he doesn't deserve it. He's going to make a move on you soon, I know he will, just like he knows I'm going to make my move on you." Ashton whispered in my ear. Going to? "I'm not giving up. You've just experienced the beginning of being courted by a farm boy."
"I...I didn't use you! We met because of Vincenzo, but that's all that happened!" I tried. "I don't need replacements!"
"Good," Ashton tapped my chin and closed the distance between our lips.