My eyes were closed but still I could hear….. I could hear different voices.
I heared the voice of my mother's crying, my brothers screaming, and my father's weeping.
For few moments, I wasn't able to detect that where am I?
I tried to remember and suddenly a memory popped into my mind.
My mother opened the door and ran towards my semi-dead body.
My body that was hanging with the fan. My mother screamed with her lungs out and hold me from my legs and started screaming.
Ansab! Faddy! Sherry! guys come here quickly, she screamed. They rushed towards me, brought me down and my brother Ansab directs Sherry to call the ambulance.
He called the ambulance quickly with shivering hands.
Meesha! Meesha! Open your eyes my sweetie pie, my mother said in shivering voice.
I was able to listen her voice but my body wasn't in position to respond her.
Ambulance arrived and they took me to the hospital,
My mother was holding my hand in the ambulance and crying,
I could hear the siren of ambulance.
"What happened to my princess," Mother said.
After that I was laying on the hospital bed, my eyes were closed, I could only hear.
"Your daughter attempted to end her life," Dr Frank said.
He was our family doctor and we have had a very good relationship with him.
He asked my mother, "Meesha is a very hardworking and intelligent student why on earth she did that?"
Only I knew the answer to this question.
The only sister of Four brothers,
Princess of his father,
Mother's beloved daughter,
why she took such a bold step?
Why did I take this step?
I think at that time even I didn't know the answer to this question.
I belong to a very well-educated family. My father was a very reputed Professor in a University and my mother was a housewife.
According to my mother I was born after three brothers with so much of prayers.
When I was born, my eldest brother Ansab was 19 years old,
Middle brother Faddy was doing his intermediate and my youngest brother Sherry was a student of 8th grade.
My parents really wanted a girl. When doctor announced my birth, my father became so overwhelmed with the emotions.
The hospital staff was so confused because they haven't seen anyone so happy after the birth of a girl.
My childhood was amazing.
I was an extremely pampered sister of my 3 brothers, lifeline of my mother and princess of my father.
I have gotten everything even before asking for it.
I loved pink color; my whole bedroom was full of pink colored things.
Even the walls of my room were painted in pink color.
At my 10th birthday my father gifted me a pink-colored huge doll house. I used to play in that doll house day and night.
One day I saw my friend room, it was purple colored.
I started demanding to change everything to purple because I was so fascinated by my friend room.
My father replaced everything with purple color things and even painted my whole room purple in just 2 days.
If I demand to eat burger or pizza in the middle of night, my brothers fulfilled my every need. The immense love and care of my family made me a kind of spoiled brat. I used to start screaming if I didn't get anything I want.
My mother used to advise my brothers and father not to make me a spoiled brat because it will be difficult to live for me in this harsh world.
My brothers and Father didn't listen to my mom.
Things kept going on and I was enrolled for a very expensive high school of the town.
At this point my eldest brother Ansab returned back from Scotland after completing his specialization. He is now a heart surgeon while my second brother was struggling to get a job after completing his degree.
From the beginning I was studying in a co-education system but I wasn't impressed by any boy.
I didn't even have male friends.
My mother was little bit strict in the matter of education despite being an over pampered girl in the house.
I was a very sharp student in studies too. I was getting A plus in my class. You can say that I was always a topper of my session.
After my schooling I pursue medicine.
My life became very busy afterwards. College, Academy books, my life was revolving around them. I wasn't having any time to think or enjoy.
I was not taking care of myself. My mother used to scold me for not taking much care of myself.
Meesha look at your hairs, your skin is getting rough day by day, my mother said.
I was no doubt a very pretty girl but hard medical routine caused dark circles and water detention in my body.
My mother wanted me to opt out medical field but I wanted to be a doctor.
When I was 7 years old, I fell off from a motorbike and got my knees bruised. My Dad took me to the hospital where I saw a beautiful Lady doctor. She was wearing her white coat and a stethoscope around her neck.
My father said to me:
Meesha one day I wanted you to be a doctor like her. You would wear a white court just like that lady doctor.
After completing my intermediate, I was anxiously waiting for the results of my medical entrance test.
Just a day before my entrance test results, my birthday party was arranged. In my birthday party my cousin Joe was also an attendee. He was a student of 3rd year of Medicine.
"What are your plans after intermediate?" Joe asked
I said "I want to be a doctor".
He said "medicine is a very tough field Meesha! Think twice before entering into this field.
I said that there is nothing in this world that Meesha cannot do. If I said that I want to be a doctor, its means I shall be a doctor at all cost.
Joe looked at me and smiled proudly and wished me luck.
Next day,
My results were announced. I got much more marks than I expected.
I could easily take admission in any medical college.
My parents didn't want to send me to any other city for my medical school. They wanted me to study in our city's medical school.
"Meesha!
I would die if you go away to any other city that is far from our house," Mom said while holding my hands.
I was so imature at that time to understand the love of my family, I wished that I could know the meaning of real love before taking the worst decision of my life...