There was a loud murmurings in the air. Everybody is asking who I am, that it's the first time they see me in town. I can't blame them if they don't know me. After all, I was never in this level before nor did Cholo wanted me to introduce into his world.
I was always the unwanted one, the untouchable chick because whoever touches me will turn into a laughingstock in their elite circle.
Palagi na ay naghihintay ako sa panahong magkakalakas ng loob siya na ipakilala ako sa kaniyang pamilya hindi bilang isang charity case na kailangan niyang dikitan para bumango sa mga kauri ko kundi bilang isang asawa na magiging katuwang niya habambuhay.
But I guess now that I am on his level, everything will change. He can proudly parade me into every nook of his class without feeling embarrassed that only a lowly uneducated employee like me has become his wife.
"Karina..." he murmured while blinking countless of times. Para bang kailangan nito iyong gawin nang makailang beses para hindi ako mawala sa paningin nito, na para bang sa isang iglap lang ay mawawala ako na parang bula sa harapan nito.
Pumatak ang isang butil ng luha ko sabay takbo papunta dito. Niyapos ko ito nang buong higpit sabay hikbi.
"Yes I am, Cholo. Buhay ako, Cholo. Buhay ako. Buhay ang asawa mo."
Ngunit ang hinihintay kong init nang pagtanggap niya sa pagbabalik ko ay hindi nangyari. Ni hindi ito tumugon sa yakap ko. He just stood there like a log. Natigilan ako at inalis ang nakayakap na braso rito. Nasasaktan na tiningnan ko siya.
"Bakit? Bakit ka ganiyan? H-Hindi ka ba masaya na makita ako? Hindi ka ba masaya na... na buhay ako? Na nakabalik akong ligtas para sa iyo?" naghihinakit na saad ko.
Dinig ko ang lumalakas na bulungan sa paligid pero hindi ako nagpaapekto. I have far more important stuff to deal right in front of me and that is to know why my own husband is not happy to see his wife come back to him.
"Karina, it's not what you think," ani nito nang bahagyang makahuma sa shock.
"It's... I am shocked to see you. I thought you're dead. It's what the police reports are saying. I saw your lifeless body so how can you..."
"I'm alive, Cholo. I'm here in front of you. Hawakan mo ako kung ayaw mo pa ring maniwala. I'm real, Cholo. And I'm back for you. I'm back, husband."
Tumiim ang titig nito sa akin saka nagbuga ng hininga. Inilapag nito ang baso ng alak sa isang table saka madilim na ang mukhang kinuha ang kamay ko at hinila ako palayo. Susunod sana sina Vishen at Celeste pero umiling ako kaya wala silang nagawa kundi manatili sa puwesto.
Humantong kami sa isang garden na napapalamutian ng mga magagarang ilaw na nakasabit sa iba'ibang kahoy at bulaklak sa paligid.
Binitiwan ako ni Cholo saka ito tumalikod at marahas na nagbuga ng hangin. I took the time to study his physical appearance. He's not lanky anymore. He has morphed into a tall, big muscled gentleman who looks every inch a dangerously handsome man, the kind that pierces you with daggers while making your heart beats faster like a broken record.
When he looks back at me, the smile on my face is already prepared for him but it faded when I saw how dark his eyes are.
Sinuyod muna niya ako ng tingin mula ulo hanggang paa bago ito nagsalita.
"Karina, why did you come here?"
His words left me speechless. Really? Ito talaga ang sasabihin niya? Ilang taon kaming hindi nagkita tapos tatanungin niya ako ng parehong tanong na binato sa akin ni Ymir?
"Ano bang klaseng tanong iyan? Siyempre bumalik ako para sa iyo dahil buhay ako. I came back for you."
"I don't believe you. What are you planning this time around? Whatever it is, drop it and go back to the place where you came from. Hindi ka na dapat na bumalik pa rito."
I smiled bitterly. "Naririnig mo ba ang sarili mo? Naririnig mo ba ang mga pinagsasabi mo? Are you seriously asking me to leave my hometown and leave you? How cruel can you get, Cholo? Kababalik ko lang tapos ganito ang maririnig ko mula sa iyo? Don't you think it's a bit too much?"
"Too much?" he relented. "You faked your death just to avoid your scandal here! That's what you call too much."
Naumid ang dila ko sa sinabi nito. "What did you say? I fake what?" anas ko.
He gritted his teeth and put his hands inside his pocket. "On that night you disappeared, I saw the CCTV. I saw you running away that night. Days after, a police report was sent to me stating that a woman's body was recovered on a creek. Her face is unrecognizable but her clothes and all the other items in her belongings are all yours. But she wasn't you when we run some tests so what can I assume that time, Karina?"
Pinahid ko ang luha sa mukha nang unti-unting mag-sink in sa akin ang lahat.
"Is that what they told you? That I orchestrated my own death?"
Pigil ko ang pagsabog ng damdamin dahil sa gumigiti na alaala noong gabing iyon.
If only he knew.
"An Asturia's word is worthier than yours, Karina."
"And you believe them?" hindi makapaniwala kong tanong. "They have a long history of deceiving people and you still believe in them?"
Inagaw nito ang hawak ko pa rin na baso ng alak at diretsong nilagok. Nakakunot ang noo nito at banaag na ang galit sa nakatiim nito na bibig. His gray eyes are flaming in anger and another emotion I can't read while he is inspecting me as if I'm a microbe he's studying under a high-graded misroscope.
Is that longing? Or pure hatred?
"I saw it with my own two eyes. No one can deceive me, Karina. Not even you."
Nagbaba ako ng tingin para kalmahin ang sarili. Alam kong hahantong sa ganito ang pagkikita namin. Kahit nangarap akong sasalubungin niya ako nang matiwasay, hindi pa rin nawala sa isip ko ang malaking posibilidad na magiging hostile siya sa akin pagkatapos kong mapilitang umalis noon nang hindi naipapaliwanag sa kaniya ang lahat.
I expected an unwelcome arrival but I never expected Cholo to be this rude and cruel.
"Kailanman ay hindi kita niloko, Cholo. Oo inaamin kong may mga pagkakataong gumagawa ako ng excuses at alibis pero nagawa ko lang iyon dahil sa estado ko. You know how condescending your family can be!"
"There you go again. You are using that card again against me and my family. Walang masamang ginawa ang pamilya ko sa iyo, Karina. Leave them out of your mess!"
And it was beginning to get blown out of the proportion. Kailangan kong huminahon at payapain ang sarili para hindi na lumaki pa ang away.
"Stop please... Cholo, I didn't mean to come here to pick a fight."
Tiningnan ko ito nang buong suyo saka hinawakan ang kamay nito.
"I came here as your doting wife. I came here for reconciliation with a little bit of hope that we could start off where we left if off. Can we go back to that night, Cholo? Can you love me again?"
"Can you hear yourself Karina? I never knew you could look like the most expensive woman in a moment and speak like a true-bloodied delusional being the next second after."
Pinasadahan niya ako nang nanunuyang tingin mula ulo hanggang paa.
"I see that you have come a long way. You have garbed yourself with designer clothes but you forgot to cleanse your pathetic soul. I won't fall for your trap again, Karina. Leave this place or I'll drag you out of Cerro Roca by myself."
Puno ng poot ang mukha nito habang binibitawan ang mga katagang iyon. His eyes are hurling out knives towards my direction which left me in a state of confusion.
Did I miss something? How can Cholo be this furious?
Bakit parang nabaliktad ako?
"You can't do that. I'm your wife and you are my husband!" sabi ko na lang sa kawalan nang masasabi.
"Stop calling me your husband. We were never married. Get your filthy face away from here, Karina. I don't want to see you ever again."
Tumalikod ito para bumalik sa pagtitipon pero maagap ko siyang nahawakan sa kamay para pigilan.
"You got a reputation with women for being nice and gentle to them. I'm taking that back."
Binaklas niya ang hawak ko rito at matalim akong tinapunan ng tingin.
"No one cares about what Karina Versoza thinks. Go home, woman."
I stood my ground and raised my hand towards him. Natutok ang tingin niya sa singsing na suot ko.
"Correction. I'm no longer just Karina Versoza. I'm now Karina Versoza Gastrell. I'm Mrs. Gastrell. I'm your wife, Cholo. You have an obligation to me."
Saglit na tila hindi ito nakahuma. Nakamata lang ito sa akin at sa daliri ko bago nito nakuhang magsalita.
"Our marriage was not registered. It was void to begin with."
Ipinilig ko ang ulo at nginitian ito. "It is legal and binding. You can check it," hamon ko rito. "You are legally married to me, Cholo."
Napipi ito. He remained silent in a few minutes and was only looking at the cheap ring on my finger. As if on cue, a loud sound of a broken glass filled the uncomfortable silence.
Pareho kaming lumingon para tingnan kung saan nanggaling ang tunog.
There, on a brightly lit corner stood a woman in her majestic silver gown covering her mouth with her dainty hand while crying.
"Ely..." Cholo muttered, fear is evident in his voice.
Napalingon ako sa asawa ko na puno nang pag-aalala na nakatingin sa babaeng ngayon ay kagat na ang labi at pinaglipat-lipat sa aming dalawa ang tingin. Nahinto ang tingin niya sa akin saka sa singsing na nasa kamay ko.
Tumalikod ang babae at patakbong pumasok sa hall.
"Ely!" sigaw ni Cholo at akmang hahabulin ang babae pero mabilis ko itong napigilan.
"Stay, Cholo. Stay here with me," pakiusap ko rito.
Binato niya ako nang mabangis na tingin dahilan para mabitawan ko ang kaniyang kamay at mapaatras ako sa takot.
"Stop ruining our lives, Karina. I might not spare you this time especially if you plan on laying a hand on my woman," babala nito saka malalaki ang hakbang na hinabol ang babae.
Nayanig ang mundo ko sa pasabog nito. Why? The Cholo I know is not capable of loving. What did that effin' woman do for him to feel the very thing I wanted to get from him from the very start?
Hinawakan ko ang basang mukha at tiningnan sa kamay ang luha. Parang patalim na paulit-ulit na isinasaksak sa aking dibdib ang mga narinig ko mula rito kanina. Ayaw ko mang aminin pero sobrang naapektuhan ako.
Inaasahan ko nang medyo mahihirapan akong makipagbalikan sa kaniya. What I didn't expect is the undoubtedly towering presence of the woman in Cholo's life.
Unti-unting gumuhit sa mga labi ko ang ngiting tagumpay habang pinupunasan ko ang mukha.
"Pinapadali mo lang ang lahat para sa akin, Elizabeth," mahinang saad ko habang tinatanaw ang maliwanag na bulwagan sa loob.
"Ms. Karina! Are you okay?"
Hindi ko pinansin ang humahangos na si Celeste kasunod ang blangkong mukha ni Vishen.
Kaagad na lumapit sa akin ang assistant at pinunasan ang basang mukha ko gamit ang tissue.
"Celeste, do you know why I'm crying?"
Parang maiiyak na nagtaas ito ng tingin sa akin. "You are hurt, Ms. Karina. Matagal mong hinintay ang pagdating ng pagkakataong ito pero balewala lang iyon sa asawa mo. Kung umasta siya ay parang hindi ka niya asawa!"
I chuckled to dismiss it but then I think that she's right. Cholo is everything but happy to see me alive and kicking and very much back in his life.
"You're right, Celeste. And I hate every jiffy of it."
Natapos ang gabing iyon na nagngingitngit ako sa galit habang paulit-ulit na isinusumpa sa sarili na makukuha ko rin ang asawa ko.
Nagsisimula pa lang ako, Cholo. Pasasaan ba't liliko at liliko ka rin. Sa huli, hahantong at babalik ka rin sa akin.