I had just returned home from school. I mean, I went to the mall and watched a movie, so technically I just got home from school. It's 8 p.m., and I know my parents are waiting for me in the living room, as they always do, to chastise me for being late. I'm not sure if they genuinely care about me or if they just want to have power over my life. To say the least, this is extremely inconvenient. I couldn't even do the things I wanted to do because they were always in the way, and sometimes even ahead of me. I'm like a maximum-security prisoner whose legs and hands are cuffed and who is guarded 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Jesus!
'Could you please explain why you're late?' Mom's high-pitched voice was a source of constant amusement for me. Sarcastically.
'I went to the movies.' I responded by looking her in the eyes.
'At school?' Yes. She is sarcastic and witty.
Wait a minute. This is something new. My ideal father isn't here. What happened to him? My father is the most terrifying person in this house, not my mother. If he doesn't like your response to his question, you should flee immediately because he will slap you across the face without even noticing.
'Does it really need to be said every day that you should come home early?'
'It's eight o'clock, Mom. I think it's still early.'
'Your last class ends at 4 p.m.,' says my mom. 'You say you watched a movie for four hours?' At this point, she's becoming enraged.
'Yes! I went to see two films.'
'Is that more important than studying for your exams?' she said.
'Yes.' I said yes because it's true. Don't misunderstand me. I learn more interesting things from watching than from studying subjects that I never liked in the first place.
'If you respond to me like that again, I will lock you in your room,' Mom said as she approached me. 'Forever.' She then turned away from me and went straight to their room.
What did I say, anyway? I was simply being honest in my response to her because that was exactly what I needed to say. And what did she have to say about it? Does she intend to confine me to my room for the rest of my life? Ha! I've never known true freedom since my birth.
That is the crux of their problem. I was never given a chance to express myself. I was never given the opportunity to express my emotions in our home because they took that away from me from the beginning. And now that I'm already struggling, it's getting harder for me to even breathe. So, how did I manage to stay alive? I told and persuaded myself to stop living so that I wouldn't have to breathe. I get used to it, and at this point, breathing is still not in my system.
After my mother threatened me again in the living room, I went to my room and will remain there for the rest of the night. I changed into my pajamas and sat on my bed to rest my entire body. There is an immediate desire to speak with someone else. Then I think of Nilliam, who I remember right away. After years of feeling nothing, tonight is the first time I've felt compelled to talk to someone in particular.
'Should I contact him?' I'm curious.
Seriously? I'm debating whether or not to contact him.
'Perfect! Of course, I don't have his phone number.'
Anyway, I don't want to squander any more time thinking about him or anything else. Let's call it a night and get some rest.
As a result, I simply shut my eyes and...
'Facebook! Facebook! Facebook!' I burst out laughing. I abruptly sat up in my bed.
'Right. I'll be able to send him a message from there.'
When I opened my laptop to turn it on, I noticed myself reflected on the screen. SMILING!
I immediately shut down my laptop.
'Did I just smile?' This is the strangest. I haven't smiled in a long time, so I'm having some strange feeling right now.
When was the last time I laughed? Perhaps when I was 14 years old? That's quite a history, in my opinion. We were in the province because my parents were on vacation at the time, I recall. Yes. I'm not really a part of their vacation because they were the only ones having fun, and I was only in the hotel room having fun with myself. I used to be confused as to why my parents were behaving so badly. They didn't seem concerned about me at the time, but I now understand why.
Anyway, that night, I decided to sneak out of my room and go for a walk along the beach. I was fortunate that my father did not notice me leaving the room, because he would have beaten me otherwise. They're the wretchedest of the wretched. What did I do to them for treating me so disrespectfully? So I brought my camera, a gift from my uncle for my 13th birthday, and photographed the nightlife. My sand footprints, the tiny waves lapping against the shore, and even the little crabs walking and dancing on the sand in the middle of the night. I photographed them as a reminder of my limited freedom at the time.
While photographing that night, I came across a single firefly. I looked around, but no other fireflies were swooping around me. I wondered at the time, 'Is he lost?' It landed on my shoulder as it got closer to me as if to wish me a good night, and then asked, 'What are you doing here as well?' Our paths crossed in the middle of the night when we were both alone and aimlessly wandering around. It's just that I'm enjoying my newfound freedom. I felt a little warmth in my heart while looking at the firefly, which caused me to smile for a moment. I took a photo of it, and thankfully, I was able to do so even though the image is a little blurry. But now, whenever I look at the photos I hung on the walls in my room, I can't bring myself to feel them again. I couldn't get that smile from my head any longer.
When my phone rings, I'm lying back down in my bed, ready to sleep.
'Who is it that is calling at this hour?' Then I looked at my phone, I'm not surprised to see who had called.
'What?' I said over the phone.
It's the b*tch. Gean.
'Yes!' she said on the other end of the line, 'you're still awake.'
'Exactly what do you want, Gean?'
'Girl, calm down! Where you are right now?'
'Of course, I'm at home,' I replied annoyingly.
'Excellent!'
'Could you please photograph Nilliam for me?'
'Who?'
'Nilliam. Nilliam Alejo. Please don't tell me you don't...'
'I've never met him.'
'Seriously? We've known each other in History class for two years.'
Ahh. She's referring to Nilliam, the Joker, who I was thinking about earlier. So, his last name is Alejo.
'Ahh. So?' I replied with no excitement in my voice.
'All you have to do is photograph him and email them to me. I'm sure that's your expertise.' Gean added.
'Okay. Tomorrow.'
'Not tomorrow, now.' Gean let out a bit yell.
'At this f*cking hour?
She's completely insane. She's completely insane.
'Yes, baby. Now.'
'My father will kill me if I...'
The line was then disconnected. SHE F*CKING HANG UP!
Gean followed up with a text message. 'Here's the address...'
'She can't do this to me. I will call this b*tch...'
She isn't picking up the phone. I called her again, but she had switched off her phone. F*CK!
I wouldn't be surprised if I killed Gean one day. I guarantee that no one will ever doubt me.
I go downstairs and quietly put on my jacket and pants, then take my camera with me so I don't get caught. The only reason I can't use the car is that my parents would be awakened if they heard it was in use. As a result, I'm taking a cab from here to Nilliam's house. 'Does she, on the other hand, have to do it?' I'm sure you're curious and the answer is yes! This is something that I must do.
After some time, a taxi arrived. Several times during the taxi ride, I attempted to contact Gean, but she did not return any of my calls.
'Fine. If this is what she wants me to do, I will do it.' I smirked.
However, because she knows something about me that I do not want the rest of the world to know, I will swallow everything she puts in my mouth in order to keep that information hidden from the rest of the world. I'm going to put my trust in Gean on this, or else I'll reveal her pretty little secret to the entire world as well.
After a 20-minute drive, I arrived at Nilliam's house. My taxi dropped me off right in front of their gate, and I walked right in. I was prepared with my camera in case I happened to see him at their window, door, or anywhere else. Gean makes me want to kill her. I'm powerless to do anything but sigh. I look like an idiot here, dressed like a thief.
The house is very quiet. I'm curious if anyone is at home, or if they're already asleep.
'No. The lights are still turned on.'
While waiting for Nilliam to appear somewhere in their home. Someone just tapped me on the shoulder from behind me. I turned around and was astounded by what I saw.
'Are you looking for Nilliam?'
F'ck! I believe it's his mother.
'Nilliaaam!' she called. 'Let's get inside so you can take his picture clearly,' she said. Then she gave me a friendly smile. That does not appear to be a forgery. That was a genuine smile for me.
Oh my goodness... I realize this is extremely embarrassing, but f*ck it! Gean is a jerk!
I followed her into their home and sat on the sofa in their living room.
'Wait a minute. I'll inform Nilliam.' Then she left me here sitting like a dog who had been caught chewing on a pair of slippers and was chastised for it.
Nilliam emerged from his room after some time. Of course, he was taken aback when he saw me. Even I am surprised to be in their home right now.
'Hello, Nilliam,' I said as I stood up.
He returned the greeting with his trademark smile. We talked, and I explained why I had unexpectedly visited him at this hour. ALONE. I'm hoping he'll believe me.
'Is that all?' he asked.
'Yeah'. What? Is there anything else he wants? He's certainly odder than I am.
'You could have texted me and we could have done it at school,' he says.
BUT I DO NOT HAVE YOUR PHONE NUMBER. I thought to myself.
'Oh, I'm sorry if I'm bothering you...'
'No!' You don't have to yell, Nilliam. Don't worry.
So, despite the fact that I was tired and wanted to go home, we continued to talk. Forget about Gean. I'll just do it tomorrow. Her mother then emerged from their kitchen and invited us to dinner. Because of their tenacity, I was caught off guard and didn't have the chance to say "no."
Nilliam's mother and he have an extremely pleasant relationship. They appear to be content simply talking to one another. Their house appears to be extremely... cozy. I'm hoping our house is in the same shape. They are simple but warm because of their smiles. I kept a close eye on them. While I was eating, I enjoyed listening to them, and I believe Nilliam is fortunate to have his mother. Then, all of a sudden, my phone started ringing. When I realized my father was calling, I jumped out of my seat.
'I'm very sorry; I need to get home.' I told both of them.
'Are you leaving now?' Nilliam inquired.
'Thank you for the dinner.' Then I dashed out of their house as fast as I could.
Right now, I'm feeling even more embarrassed. Dad went into my room and found that I wasn't there. He's calling me again. I must respond to him.
'Dad?'
'Get out of there, or I'm going to make a scene.'
No way! Is he outside? How did he manage to snag her? How did he know I'm here?
Then I noticed him standing outside the gate, with our car parked next to him, and I ran as fast as I could to catch up with him.
'Could you please tell me what you're doing here?' He appears to be extremely enraged with me right now. 'I followed you here because I saw you sneaking out of the house.' He fixed his gaze on me and gave me his undivided attention. 'Could you tell me what you're doing here?'
'I uhm forgot my camera at school, and my classmate...'
'You can still get your camera even if you don't come here now. You have classes the next day. Are you trying to fool me?' His anger is visible in his eyes.
'I'm sorry. I just think that it is preferable...'
Then he yanked my phone from my grasp tossed it in the air and landed somewhere.
We're back in action. Okay, then go ahead and do it. Smack me across the face. I'm excited about it. My face is braced for the strength of your hands.
'Get in the car!' he yelled angrily.
Before getting in, I dashed inside the car and pretended nothing had happened. Dad didn't say anything, not a single word, as we drove to the house. We're both completely deafeningly silent.
I'm pretty sure I know what's going to happen next. When we get to the house, he constantly threatens me, scolds me, and demoralizes me. I'm already familiar with all of that. Every line, as well as every curse directed at me, was memorized. But I'm no longer in pain. At this point, I'm used to it.
'Audria, what were you thinking? Are you stupid?!' Mom exclaimed when we arrived at our destination.
See? I told you. And, indeed! She is correct. Her only child is completely stupid.
'Stop wasting your time!', my father exclaimed. 'Grow up!'
Anyway, I just sat back and let them talk for however long they wanted. You don't want to hear those words, I swear. I've been in this situation for a long time, and their words have lost their power over me. Nothing can hurt me any longer. They let my condition deteriorate to this point. They had an impact on my development into this type of person.
After they had finished hurting my feelings with those hurtful words, I went to my room and pretended as if nothing had happened. I set my camera on top of my table, close to the window. A firefly greeted me as I looked out the window. I opened my window to let the firefly in. It swooped around my room, as if he was showering me with the light he'd brought with him. When I looked at it, I noticed that I was smiling unusually. It managed to make me forget about the hurtful words I received from those who were supposed to look after me.