October 8, 1938
Dear Journal,
I just recently got this journal, father has just bought me this for my birthday which was yesterday I am 16 now. Oh well I should introduce myself, My name is Adara Mae Kleinman and I live in Munich, Germany. My family lives here in a small apartment my father Frank is a doctor though he can only practice on Jews. My father's name is Frank Aron Kleinman he grew up here in Munich with his parents Lilith and Aron. Grandpa Kleinman died when he was 13 so my grandma Kleinman was forced to get a job she worked in factory to support father he was an only child. My father left Munich for Berlin to study to become a doctor there he met my mother Sarah. My mother lived in Berlin with her mother Berta who died when I was 3. Anyway so my parents met and after father graduated they married in 1922. I was then born on October 7, 1923. When I was 5 my grandma Kleinman moved into our little apartment and she stayed she wanted to be closer to dad and me. I also live here with my sister Rebekah she is 10 years old and her birthday is close to mine her birthday is September 4, 1928. Rebekah is has brown hair and hazel eyes she is very much a girly girl and loves to dress up but sometimes she can be extremely aggravating, we share a room and its hard especially since there's 6 years between us. As mentioned above we are liberal Jews, things haven't been right for us since Hitler rise in 1933. Grandma moved in with us she had a small store in the market place not far from our home she sold mostly books and such. In April 1933 people began to boycott Jewish businesses and my grandma lost a lot of business but she has still been able to keep it open. We have now many restrictions on us now since the Nuremberg laws came in Jews are not allowed to marry non-Jews, Jews are not allowed to employ German women under 45. Those are just examples things were getting really bad at my school that my parents last month took Rebekah and I out and put us in a Jewish school. I recently made a new friend there her name is Hester Schedler, she is also 16 and recently moved here from Berlin. Her family moved here because they felt Munich would be better than Berlin I hope things won't get worse.
November 14, 1938
Dear Journal,
Things have gotten worse during the night of the 9th we heard noises and glass breaking. We live down the street from our synagogue, Rebekah woke up "What is going on Mama". Mama looked out the window and urge father over "Frank look they are burning the synagogue" Father looked out he was speechless he walked over to the couch sat down and sighed "Sarah, we must not leave the apartment, they might attack us, girls you are to stay in the apartment you are not to leave we must remain quiet." I look out the window and see the flames then I look down into the street, I see people young men with swastikas wrapped around their arms beating up an elderly man I recognize him Josef Bensa, he owned the bakery across the street from our apartment. "Father look its Mr. Bensa they are beating him" I yell to father his store windows were smashed. Father yelled at me "Adara Mae, away from the window NOW!" I stepped away from the window and sat next to Rebekah she was reading Anne of Green Gables over on the sofa. Grandma was shaking with anxiety.We heard men outside the apartment screaming "Juden raus" then we heard screams. Rebekah began to quietly sob all I could to was comfort I her "Its okay Bekah everything will be okay" she laid her head into my lap. We heard the men outside began throwing rocks our apartment windows were smashed and Mama ,father and grandma got scared Rebekah turned white. Father rushed us out of the apartment "We must head to the attic" he said. We rushed up the flight of stairs to the 3rd floor we lived below on the 2nd. We all ran to the attic we found Rabbi Krueger's wife Eda and their twin sons Heinz and Rupert and their daughter Eva also hiding in the attic. But Rabbi Krueger was not there father asked "Mrs. Krueger , where is Rabbi Krueger". Mrs. Krueger shrugged her shoulders she was pale and frightened. She held the her twin boys tightly to her chest the small boys were also pale and shivering from the fear of the crowd. These black haired blue eyed boys of 5 years had a look on there face I will never forget. Little Eva 9 years old was also frightened but was looking out the small attic window, when Mrs. Krueger whispered quietly "Eva, away from the window come here" Eva moved across the room and huddled beside her mother. Rebekah and I sat closer to the window to watch the crowd our own neighbors participate in a small bonfire of books burning them on our street outside the apartment. Then a crash below, they crowd came into the Krueger's apartment below us. We heard glass smashing, furniture being moved, things being knocked over." I whispered Mrs. Krueger ''Where is the Rabbi" she finally spoke ''I don't know he left 3 hours ago I haven't seen him since''. The night pressed on and on. We stayed in the attic in the morning as well, and in the afternoon returned to our apartments. Father opened the door of our apartment and we entered, our apartment had been ransacked in the night father's coin collection was stolen. Our living room was in shambles books from the bookcase we strewn about the floor. Father leaned down picked up our family photo the glass was broken. He sat in back on the table. He sighed and said "well, we should clean some of this up, Adara help me pick some of the books up here please." I sauntered over and started to help father. ''Rebekah and I will fix up some lunch for all of us, Mamma why don't you go lay down for a while" Mama said to grandma. grandma nodded "Thank you I shall what a night''. Grandma laid down for the afternoon and we ate small sandwiches, we later heard a knock on the door we opened it. It was Mrs. Krueger. "You are all okay" she muttered softly, We all nodded Father asked her "Has the Rabbi returned" she cried to us "no he is dead, he was beaten to death by the crowd they found him." Mrs. Krueger began to cry hysterically, mama comforted Eda. "It will be alright'' Mama continued to tell her while hugging her. Rebekah backed away into the corner father stared on, and grandma entered the room. "What has happened" she asked with a puzzled look on her face. Everyone was speechless. After a minute of silence I answered her since father was still in a daze. "Rabbi Krueger is dead" she looked at me with a shocked expression "How?" she asked "They KILLED HIM" cried Mrs. Krueger who went back to crying. "I can't stay in there alone what about the children.'' Mother answered her "Come and stay with us for the night." She uttered softly to Mrs. Krueger she accepted with a nod. That night 9 people were cramped into a small apartment, and we waited and hoped for tomorrow to be better.
December 4, 1938
Dear Journal,
Things have recently gotten worse for us all. The Nazis have taken over grandma's store, they issued a decree. It happened just three days after what the British are now call Kristallnacht. Grandma's store was vandalized when she left the apartment with father on the 11th. Father went to attend to a client nearby and grandma checked on the store. She found it vandalized glass had been smashed there was the star of David on the window and it had been ransacked. Many books laid around the floor ripped and burned to a crisp she says. Money was even stolen. When she found out the next day about the new decree that bars us Jews from stores and retail agencies. We can't sell anything from any kind of establishment. Grandma was devastated and remarked angrily to father "We are no longer allowed to make our own living, what are we to do then STARVE!". Father did his best to console her anger by saying "Mama, don't worry, we are going to be okay" She nodded and went to lay down. We are further oppressed we can't attend public school, cinemas,theaters, or even sports facilities. There are even certain areas that we can't enter because they are "Aryan designated".Things are just getting harder and harder poor grandma. In August our passports we made invalid and we now have our papers marked with a big J.
Yesterday afternoon I went off to spend time with Hester. Hester lives a few blocks away so I rode my bike down to her place. Before I did I asked Rebekah if she wanted to come she said "No, I'd rather go spend some time with Eva." Ever since the events of last month Bekah has been to afraid to leave our home. She spends most of her time in the apartment with Mama and grandma, she occasionally goes over to see Eva. So I said "Alright tell Mama and gran I went to Hester's house. I rode my bike and arrived at Hester's around 11:00 Hester came out and smiled ''Hello Adara". "Hi, what are we to do today ?" I questioned Hester when a girl came over with her bike from the nearby house. She had blonde hair and blue eyes, Hester waved the girl over. "Adara, this is Helena Schlegel she is new to the street.'' the girl spoke "Hi" she remarked "Nice to meet you." I said to her and added "Have you just moved to Munich'' she shook her had and said "No just to the neighborhood". I asked again to Hester what should we do we decided to have a snowball fight. So for the an hour or two we had fun running around and so on. When a women with an angry look came upon us. She eyed Helena then us. Helena asked "Mama, what is wrong why are you here." The woman I now understood was Helena's mother continued to stare at us then at Helena and continued ''Helena, who are these girls..". Helena answered "I just met Hester Schedler yesterday, and this is Adara Kleinman they live in neighborhood and asked me to join them this afternoon" her mother became furious and shouted"JEWS Helena you are playing with Jews, off lets go NOW!''. Helena got off the bike and followed her mother and muttered "goodbye". They were out of site Hester and I were speechless we have experience many taunts from other people but never been excluded or shamed like this so we couldn't hang with non-Jews either. We both sat on a bench the rest of the afternoon and then returned home.
December 31, 1938
Dear Journal,
This past week we had Hanukkah it was great for the most part. I just recently got from Mama a pair of stockings, father gave me some chocolate and Rebekah gave me hat and pair of gloves she knitted herself.Grandma gave me a sweater.I said thank you to them all. I gave Mama a pair of mitts I knitted, father received a hat and scarf, Rebekah i gave her some candy and Grandma a pair of slippers.
Many people are now leaving Germany because of the events of last month. I was home on Saturday two weeks after the night of broken glass when I heard voices in father and Mama's room. "Should we leave, we can go to England maybe or even to Canada to were Elisabeth is. She would help us sponsor us anything right it is worth a try." I recognized Mama's voice she was whispering to father he replied " I will not leave Germany, I have every right to be here as much as any other German. We were born here lived here for generations why should we leave?.What can those Nazis do any more then what they already have done to us. Things will get better my dear Sarah life will be what it once was trust in that.''
The door was slightly ajar, I could see Mama and father embracing. Then mama looked up into father eyes and muttered "What about the girls Frank, what if something happens to them? if it is hard to get all of us out can we get the girls to cousin Elisabeth in Canada." Father took Mama's face into his hands and reassured by saying "We will all be fine trust in that my dear".No more words were uttered Mama and father went to bed then. I stared at the ground my thoughts were jumbled. Leave Germany? Would be better if we did? I have no idea. I love Germany even though these past few years we have gone through many struggles. I felt father was right why should we leave the land we were born in? We did have as much right as any other German to stay and live quietly undisturbed. I wondered Why did Hitler hate us? Why did Germans agree with him?
I fell asleep in bed thinking these thoughts. I woke up in the morning to find Rebekah looking out the window I asked her "What are you to do today Bekah?'' she looked at me I noticed that she had been crying. I asked her "What is the matter Rebekah, what is it". Rebekah sighed and began to tell "Eva is gone, she is gone." I was shocked and puzzled "Where is has she gone to then what has happened." I was truly scared I thought something terrible happened has the S.S or Gestapo come and taken Mrs. Krueger and the children away? Father entered the room and saw the terror on my face " What is wrong my dear" He asked puzzled. I said "Rebekah says Eva has gone". Father look at me tenderly and said "Don't worry my girls, they are safe nothing has happened to them. The Krueger's have left for England, Mrs. Krueger's sister lives there and has heard what happened to the Rabbi. She had urged them to come live with her after that night Eda had started to work on the family's immigration there. They are gone but are safe." I nodded I was little sad I would miss the children I had often looked after them for the Rabbi and Eda. I was sad for Rebekah Eva was her closest friend. Now she was gone and Bekah would be lonely but I hoped she would met others. I sat next to her and said "Oh Bekah, there will be more friends in life,I am sure there is another girl you can find at our new school''. It was little comfort to her and she ran to her room heartbroken. Father smiled "She will met another friend our Bekah." then he went to his office. I then sat down in the chair and read my book.