"This is really getting out of hand," I whispered to myself while staring down at the sleeping beauty snoring beside me. Femella in all her glory is splayed beneath the white sheets, her legs entangled on his thighs.
"Man, this is crazy," I softly speak to prevent her from waking up.
Nagtatalo ang loob ko kung ia-analyze ba ang kakaibang nararamdaman o hahayaan na lang. This has been bugging me for the past days that we were together and was only cemented after our literal heated encounter last night.
I scoot over and brushed the sides of her hair. "Femella Alcantara. Femella Alcantara." The rolling of her name in my tongue seems so good to hear. Tinitigan ko ang dalaga na mahimbing pa ring natutulog.
"Why.. Why do I feel like I've met you before? Why does it feel like I've known you for years? Your touch, your smell, even your presence felt too familiar."
Gumalaw ang babae at unti-unting nagmulat ng mga mata. She seems disoriented at first but when her eyes settled on mine, she relaxed and smiled.
"Hi.." she said in her sweet sultry bedroom voice. Her voice and smile brought a certain warmth to his being.
"Hi," I greeted her back and tucked the strands of her hair behind her ear. "Rise now sunshine. It'll be a long day ahead. I'll take you into a tour around the island."
Namilog ang mga mata nito at bumakas ang excitement sa mukha. She sank back to the bed and closed her eyes. I can't help myself but stare down at her.
"Sounds fun."
"You can rest for a couple of hours if you want to."
Umiling ito at tuluyan nang bumangon. "No. We're only four days away from going back to the city so I might as well go sightseeing. Sayang naman ang pananatili ko rito kung hindi ko I mean natin malilibot ang isla. You told me you will show me around."
Umasim ang mukha ko pagkaalala sa kasunduan namin. Right. That goddamn piece of contract is blocking my way.
Your way to what? Tanong ng isang bahagi ng isip ko.
I watched her proceed to the bathroom and closed the door. Bumangon na rin ako at hinagilap ang cellphone sa side table na kanina pa nagba-vibrate. Umupo ako sa kama at sinagot ang kaibigan.
"Pare," sagot ko.
"Langya, bakit ngayon lang kita na-contact, man? Ilang araw na akong sumusubok na makipag-arrange ng appointments sa iyo pero hindi ako sinasagot nang matino ng secretary mo. She always said it's confidential. Saan ka ba ngayon pare at hindi na kita mahagilap?" sunud-sunod na ratsada ni Luther sa kabilang linya.
"I'll tell Christine to schedule our meeting next week," ani ko at lumabas ng silid para magluto.
"Next week pa? I need to talk about our business partnership this week. I already got myself a few willing investors."
"I can't, pare. I'm in a middle of a very important mission this time. I'll talk to you personally next week pagbalik ko." Naglabas ako ng pasta mula sa cupboard at nagpakulo ng tubig.
"Saan ka ba kasi ngayon? Ako na lang ang pupunta sa iyo diyan. Tamang-tama para ma-practice ko uli ang pagiging piloto ko. Sayang naman ang lisensya ko. Mukhang kinakalawang na rin kasi. Saan ka ba? Egypt? Indonesia? Slovenia?"
Natawa ako sa sinabi niya.
"Kakagaling ko lang sa Europe last month. Slovenia is included in my itinerary. Indonesia is also great pero time out muna ako sa rainforest trekking. I can do that here in the country. Egypt? I remembered traveling there five years ago." Binuksan ko ang ref at kumuha ng shrimp.
"So you're here in the Philippines. Babae iyan ano? Hindi ka pa ba tapos sa kahibangan mong iyan, pare? Ilan pa bang babae ang dapat na kausapin mo para makalimutan mo na ang bagay na iyan?"
Natawa ako sa sinabi ni Luther.
"Ulol! Wag mo akong magaya sa iyo na basta na lang kinakalimutan ang lahat pagkatapos ng isang gabi. My life is in the line here, pare," seryoso na ang boses ko.
"Okay, okay. I let you do your thing. Basta ba mag-iingat ka na this time. Sa kakahanap mo sa kaniya, buhay mo naman ang napapahamak."
"Salamat pare. Nakakakilig ang concern mo."
"Gago!"
He hung up on me.
Natatawang ipinagpatuloy ko na ang pagluluto.
Narinig kong bumukas ang pinto ng silid at namuo sa buong sala ang mahalimuyak na bango ni Femella. I stopped chopping the garlic and looked back at her.
She's wearing my shirt again which I find to be appealing. Tumutulo pa ang tubig mula sa mahabang buhok nito na kinukuskos niya gamit ang towel. No make-up. No fancy clothes and yet Femella looks the classiest.
She came to me and peered at the pot, her rich caramel-like scent assaulted my nostrils.
"What are you cooking?" Isinampay nito ang towel sa balikat.
"Fettuccine Alfredo with shrimps," I answered while putting a butter on the pan to cook the shrimps.
"Looks good." Lumapit ito sa brewing machine at nagsimulang gumawa ng kape.
"After this, you'll take me around 'di ba?" dagdag nito.
"Yeah, the island offers many water activities. We can try some of them since a day is not enough to cover them all. I'll teach you how to surf."
Hinango ko gamit ang pasta gamit ang strainer at idiniretso sa kawali at hinalo.
"Sure." Inilapag ni Femella sa tabi ko ang isang mug ng kape bago naglagay sa kaniyang cup.
"Thank you." I picked up the coffee and sipped. Perfect. The taste is really good. Makes me wanna ask how did she easily catch the right blend of my coffee.
Nilingon ko ang babae na naglalagay ng plato sa mesa habang umiinom ng kape sa kabilang kamay. This feels too intimate. Me cooking while she is preparing the table.
I suppressed a grin. It's like one of those scenes I saw with my brother and my sister-in-law.
"Fem?" Her name slipped in my tongue before I could even stop myself.
"Yeah, what is it?" she asked without turning her back to me.
"If I ask you to be my girlfriend, will you say yes?"
Marahas na nilingon ako ng babae. Nanlalaki ang mga mata at nakaawang ang bibig nito. Pagkatapos ay yumugyog ang mga balikat nito at humalakhak. Hinawakan nito ang tiyan at naluluhang tiningnan ako.
"Seriously? Ang aga-aga tapos nagpapatawa ka?" Pinahid nito ang nangilid na luha sa mga mata at umupo sa dulo ng mesa.
I turned off the fire and faced her. "No, I'm fuckin serious. Will you be my girlfriend?"
Tumawa uli ito saka ako binigyan ng tingin na parang nababaliw na ako. Yeah, I know I'm crazy for asking such question to her but hey, it's been years since I asked a woman to be my girlfriend.
"Am I that good in sex? Eh wala nga akong ginawa. Humiga lang ako doon at okay tumayo when we did it under the shower. Iyon lang ang ginawa ko tapos nabaliw ka na agad sa alindog ko? Ano ka ba naman, Fuentebella. You're asking a woman here with a despicable question."
"It's Mav once again." I crossed my ankle over another, leaned in the counter and sternly look at her. "Sa tingin mo dahil lang sa sex kaya kita gustong maging girlfriend?"
"Yes."
My mouth twisted into a grin. "You're right. So? Yes or no?"
She rolled her eyes. "You're a fuckin asshole, you know that right?"
Mas lumapad pa ang ngisi ko. I really love the way she flares up. Kapag nahihiya ito, nagba-blush, nagagalit, naiiyak at humahalinghing sa ilalim ko, I find her to be the most beautiful during those moments.
"Marami ang nagsabi pero alam mo ba ang nangyari pagkatapos? Lahat sila sumunod din sa gusto ko. The end."
"Malamang! Napilitan sila!"
I shook my head. "Uhuh. No, they did it on their own will. Never have to lift a finger and repeat my words. You know what I did? Negotiation. I gave them a deal they can't refuse."
She fired me an intrigued look. "What's the deal for me?"
I grinned once again. "Whatever you want. House? Money? Fame? All of them? I'll give you everything you want."
"Gosh! You talk like a sugar daddy!"
"I'm too cruel be be described as sugar though calling me a daddy will only spice what's going on between us." Kumuha ako ng plato para i-transfer ang pasta.
"There's nothing going on between us except sex." Bumaba ito sa mesa at nagsalin pa ng kape sa mug.
Hawak ang plato ng pagkain na pumunta ako sa likod ni Femella at hinawi ang buhok nito saka hinalikan ang batok nito. Napapitlag ito sa ginawa ko pero agad ding nakabawi at ipinagpatuloy ang pagbuhos sa likido.
"Yes, exactly the reason why I'm asking you to be my girlfriend." Bumaba ang halik ko sa leeg nito at pumulupot sa bewang niya ang libreng kamay ko.
"No." Her icy cold voice stopped me from what I'm doing. Lumayo siya sa akin at naglagay ng tamang distansiya sa pagitan namin.
Nakayukong humugot ito ng hininga bago nagtaas ng ulo sa akin. Natigilan ako sa nakitang determinasyon sa mukha niya.
"No, I will not be your girlfriend. After this one-week stint we have and after getting your payment for me, I'll leave the club. You see Mav, people don't just plunge into the mud without any reason. Everyone has ambitions. You do. I do. It's only a matter of how people will go at great lengths to achieve it or not. This is my way of getting mine. Sapat naman siguro ang pera mo para sa mga plano ko sa buhay. Kaya hindi. I won't accept your proposal."
Tinalikuran na niya ako at bumalik sa hapag bago pa ako makapagsalita. I stand there holding the plate full of pasta and shrimps perplexed and left thinking about what she said.
Fine, I'll stop analyzing. I have to accept her refusal at a face value.
Sumunod ako kay Femella at inilapag ang pagkain sa mesa pagkuwan ay inokupa ang katapat na silya.
"Tama ka."
She looked up to me from her coffeee, her brows slightly raised. "Saan?"
"Sa sinabi mo na wala kang ginawa. You just laid and stood there doing nothing."
Umawang ang labi nito at iniikot ang mata. "Asshole." She gave me a finger.
I just laughed at her burning face trying to wipe off the feeling of rejection that is slowly settling in my heart.