By the first cock-crow, we were already up, bathed and dressed, despite our fatigue
from sleeping late, busy guarding mouth-watering confectioneries. Of course we ate
a couple of them, as a way to taste and also to satisfy the temptations in our
salivating mouths. Lucky us, those who do the morning duty of cooking, our job is
the lightest and after that we settle into the festivities of the day with the rest of the
people.
Rumbidzai and Shamiso get down to preparing the breakfast as I clean the house.
After I have finished cleaning, they start setting the table and by the time people start
waking up, we are done with everything and so people get down to eating.
"You girls should be working in professional bakeries. The way these confectioneries
are nice, one would swear that they were bought from a bakery." Ambuya says, a
proud smile plastered on her lips.
"Ini, I love the pies. Eyi they are so nice, especially the meat pie. Hayi apa matiuraya
nezvinonaka. (You really want to kill us with good food.)" Uncle Jeremiah says,
causing our smiles to widen.
"The girls sure know how to cook. I am sure the men who will marry them will be
very proud. Your in-laws shall visit you like no man's business, just to get a taste of
the delicacies that you girls cook." My mother says, as she eyes Shamiso and I from
across the table.
"They will make their husbands and children obese with all this nice food. Already,
Rumbidzai's children are fat from all the nice food that their mother cooks." Sekuru
says, earning himself a shy smile from Rumbidzai. Did I tell you, Rumbidzai is the
only one among the trio who does not drink or smoke but one of these Christmas
celebrations, we will have her laughing at every crazy thing even flies mating.
Marijuana is the best way to get at her.
"I really don't think their cooking is that good? I found a piece of hair in my piece of
pie." Candice says as she raises a strand of hair to show everyone as evidence.
"I don't think you would have found that piece of hair if you didn't have such a wild
wig on your head." I respond, in the process silencing everyone at the table and
causing them to look at me, wide eyed.
"What she is trying to say is, yesterday we did the cooking, whilst putting on shower
caps, since we did not have the rightful equipment. And that is a clear sign that our
baking or cooking was not exposed to our hair." Shamiso clarifies, in the process
covering up the mess that I just created in front of every eye at the table.
"And everyone is already having Christmas without me?" Ngoni says as he enters the
room. Attracting everyone's attention. He is still limping and he has lost a few
kilograms.
"At least, you still have the strength to get to breakfast. Take a seat, help yourself to
some of the food and stop being a sulky little boy who expects to be woken up in the
morning, bathed, dressed and placed at the breakfast table!" I say to him and again
everyone at the table looks at me, especially my mother. She gives me the
disapproving eye which I ignore.
I really think that Ngoni and Candice should have been a couple. The way those two
idiots cause drama is disgusting. They act like kindergarten children. Always after
the attention. They forget that they are grown up adults who now have children...
we however continue with the eating, Ngoni still casting malicious glances at me.
Rumbidzai now looks shrewd. The way her head is bent down on to the plate, you
would swear that she is trying to get into the plate. I wonder whether its respect for
Ngoni or he still is abusing her, if he is, then this time I am definitely breaking his
legs or those hands.
Breakfast goes pretty well and we do the dishes and after that, we head to the kraal
to see the men slaughtering a cow. Sekuru gives Arnold the axe to slaughter the cow
and I laugh in absolute pity. Arnold can barely slaughter a chicken. What more a
whole beast. I watch closely as Arnold tries to hit the cow with an axe. He gives the
cow one strike and the axes bumps and falls at a certain distance and there is turmoil
in the kraal. The mad beast throws a fit and I jump into the kraal, pick up the axe
and strike the mad beast on its forehead and it falls on its knees, much to everyone's
amusement.
"Gentlemen, this woman deserves a beer" I say to them as I walk out of the kraal in
absolute triumph. I have always proven to every man in my family that I am a woman
but I can do everything that the masculine specie can do, except thinking using my
sexual needs. That I cross out completely. I believe that everything should be done
in sober thought.
"I really wander where on planet earth you get your bravery." Shamiso says to me as
we head back to the house.
"The very same place where men get theirs. It's a matter of getting your act together
when everyone else is chickening out. Because one thing for sure, someone has to
do it." I respond.
"That cow almost killed you in broad daylight." She says.
"Well, that would have been a tragedy I tell you. Now let's get something to do, we
can't spend the whole day lazing around. It really gets boring." I say to Shamiso as
we head to the kitchen.
"One thing for sure, we can't spend the whole day cooking with the rest of the ladies
yet we slept late cooking." She responds.
"Let's go and braai with the gentlemen then." I suggest.
"That sounds like something that could be fun." Shamiso says, as malicious smile
creeps up her face. We go and collect the braai stand and after that, we get some
charcoal from the kitchen, get meat from the gentleman who have slaughtered the
cow and we set the world alight. Soon, other women who take care of the evening
meal have joined in too. Where there is Shamiso and I, there definitely has to be some
alcohol. This time, it's some vodka and we have diluted it with some juice and we are
all having an absolutely wonderful time as women. Everyone is now loose from all
the drinking and the topics that I am hearing here, get me rolling on my stomach.
Tomorrow, I will most definitely wake up with a sore rib cage and stomach.
Tariro is sent to call us so that we can come and eat lunch. Oh, how fast time flies.
In a few, we were eating breakfast and now we are going to eat some lunch. Worse
off, I am super full, from all the meat that I have been eating. We all go and sit at the
large table that has been placed at the gazebo. I decide to load my plate with salads,
instead of all the other foods.
"Why aren't you eating the rice?" Arnold whispers to my ear.
"I ate a hell lot of meat so I am a bit full." I respond.
"Why the whispering? Isn't the food nice?" Candice asks and this time instead of
giving her the attention that she needs, I roll my eyes and continue with my eating.
Some people don't even deserve your attention. After the meal, I don't bother to eat
desert, I go straight to bed since I am more than full. Even breathing is a bit painful.
I am awoken by Shamiso at around six, telling me that I should come and eat.
"These days, you sleep like a pregnant woman. What's going on?" Shamiso asks as
she puts on a light jersey, most probably because of the temperatures outside.
"I barely slept yesterday and I was up on my feet early today, so I really have to
recuperate." I respond, as I too get a light jersey.
"That is way too much recuperation. You slept from two in the afternoon and woke
up at half past six." She reasons.
"I really am exhausted." I say to her as we head to the dining room to have supper. I
eat a little and I go and join the other rascals outside in the cool of the evening. It
seems like the braai is continuing. I hunt for the alcohol and I dilute it with some
juice and I sink into the night's festivity. We are dancing to songs, telling stories and
drinking the damn day away. It's been long since I got this free. And so much freedom
is usually exposes, too much, especially in an environment with family members, so
I decide to cut the drinking and enjoy the festive madness.