Tetsuo Naru's POV
"I can't believe I left the knife behind. What if Tatsumi sees it and starts ending her life again? I'm so careless." I muttered to myself as I made my way back to Tatsumi's hospital room. I was about to leave the hospital when I suddenly realized that I left a knife in a room with Tatsumi, who knows what she'll do when she sees it!
I know, I know. I shouldn't think like this about her, I should trust her that she won't end her life, but it's just these anxiety attacks I keep getting, not making me rest easy and makes me think of bad things.
"Tatsumi? It's me, Tetsuo. I forgot something." I knocked on her door, waiting for her to answer. "She must be asleep." I muttered to myself as I looked at my watch, it was already 7 pm, her sleep schedule. "I'll let myself in. I'll just get the knife and leave."
I slowly opened the door, avoiding in making any sound. As I opened it, my eyes grow wide at the sight that I'm seeing. Tatsumi is sitting on her bed, the knife pointing at her throat.
"Tatsumi! Not again!" I yelled out as I ran towards her, grabbing her in the arm, stopping her from stabbing herself on the throat. "What are you doing!? Let go of the knife!!!" I yelled out, trying to take the knife away from her, but her grasp on it was too tight, making it difficult to take the knife from her.
I kept telling her to let go of it, but she doesn't answer, she just stares at me lifelessly, like the way she used to look at me the first time I came here.
"Tetsuo..." She muttered, loosening her grip on the knife. I managed to take the knife away from her hand and placed it on top of the drawer.
"W-what's gotten into you?" I asked, panting as I look at the knife. I knew I shouldn't have brought that knife, I should've just bought her ready to eat oranges.
As I kept looking at the knife, contemplating on the decision I made, I heard Tatsumi start crying. I turned to look at her and saw that she's hitting her head, her hands closed tight, forming her fists.
"H-hey! Stop it! Tatsumi!" I yelled out, grabbing her hands, stopping her from hurting herself. "What's happening to you!? Tell me!"
"You're stupid! Stupid! Stupid!"
"What are you talking about!?"
"You made me feel that I was important! For once you made me feel like someone really cared about me! You made me believe that I was important to someone! That you're stopping me from ending my life because I was important to you! But it turns out that you were only using me! Using me to get what you want!"
"W-what...?"
"Who am I kidding? How can I be important to you? We only met for a month! So how can I think that I'm important to you? I'm so dumb! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" Tatsumi managed to free one of her hands from my grasp and she started hitting her head again. "You're so stupid! Tatsumi!"
"Stop it! Tatsumi! What are you talking about!?" I asked, holding her hand again, stopping her from hurting herself any further.
"You're only using me! So you can get what you want! You're not here because you want to help me! You come here so you can help yourself! So you can end your life!"
"What do you mean so I can end my life!?"
"You said it yourself! You only come here to stop me from ending my life so you can end yours! You're only using me to get what you want!" Tatsumi's tears kept flowing as she kept on shaking her arms, trying to free them from my grasp. "You're so selfish! Every one of you! You only think about yourselves! You never think about what I feel!"
I remained silent, thinking about what Tatsumi said. Is this what she thinks? That I only come here because I need to stop her from ending her life so I can end mine?
"Tatsumi..." I muttered, letting go of her hands, pulling her in for a hug. The moment I wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tight, she stopped thrashing all around, she stopped hitting herself. "I'm sorry..."
Tatsumi remained silent as she rests her head on my chest. I let out a sigh as I begin telling her why I keep coming back here.
"Tatsumi... It's true that I keep coming back here because I need to stop you from ending your life so that I can end mine but, that changed a few days after I keep coming back here. I found myself coming back here not to just stop you from ending your life, but I found myself coming back here because I wanted to see you. I don't know why but something about you made me want to keep coming back here just to see your face, to see you smiling at the birds outside your windows."
I felt Tatsumi move her face, burying her face on my chest, making my heart beat a little faster as I continue. "I found myself coming back here not to stop you from ending your life so I can end mine, but to spend time with you, just to spend time with you. I don't even care about me dying anymore because I found out that I don't want to die, I found out that I want to spend my whole life with you. I found out that..." I stopped my sentence as I looked for courage to finish it. I took a deep breathe and I continued. "I found out that I'm in love with you."
Silence fills the air after I said the words, after saying my confession. I don't know why but something in my heart kicked my longing for suicide and replaced it with the beat of wanting to spend time with Tatsumi.
"Idiot..." Tatsumi muttered under her breath as I felt her arms slowly wrapping around me, hugging me. "You're an idiot for playing with the feelings of girls..."
"Playing with the feelings of girls? H-hey! Th-that's not what I m---" My sentence was stopped mid way as I felt something touch my lips. My eyes grew wide as I started blushing, seeing Tatsumi's lips touch mine. A kiss...? A KISS!!!?
"You're an idiot..." Tatsumi pulled away from the kiss as she starts wiping away her tears. "Is that why you always visit me? Because you started having feelings for me and not because of that deal with Death?"
"Y-yes! Th-that's why..."
"You do realize that if I live then you'll die right...? And what will happen then? What will happen to me...? You'll leave me alone..."
I fell silent as I heard what Tatsumi said, realizing Death's deal. If she lives then I'll die, but if she dies then I'll live. The both of us won't live together, only one of us will live another day.
"Hey? Tetsuo?"
End of Chapter