"And that's done with."
It's night and I'm in my room. I just finished putting up the last chapter for my story "Living the sweet life with a cool, sharp-tongued beauty". I let out a big sigh as a sense of accomplishment washes over me.
In total: 100 chapters and 200,000 characters. It took about 3 months in total to write this. I went through the whole process without skipping a day. I don't want to sound too conceited, but I think I did a pretty damn good job.
I pull the tab on the canned coffee I bought on the way home, as I guzzle it down my throat. The aroma coming from the can is a familiar one, as I taste the comforting sweetness. It's my way of a small celebration for myself for sticking with this and not taking a break.
"This tastes pretty damn good if I do say so myself."
For 130 yen, it's unbelievable that I can experience something like this.
Ping
I hear the notification sound on my laptop, and check the comment box. There's only one person who would reply so quickly.
"Congratulations on finishing, it's been a great ride from beginning to end! I was bawling during the scene when Ryousuke-kun proposed to Maika-chan in the bamboo hut. I'll be looking forward to your next work. Thanks as always, author!"
"Thanks for coming on the ride too, Nira-san..."
I feel myself being overcome with emotions. Thinking back, Nira-san has been reading my works for five years now. And Nira-san hasn't missed a day either, commenting on every single update. Since the autumn of my first year of middle school when I put up out my first story (which as cringy as hell anyways) and fell into despair, Nira-san has been there for me. I really am grateful for Nira-san. I remember that I was so overjoyed that I smashed my pinky toe on the bed. If it weren't for Nira-san, I wouldn't have made it this far. Without a doubt, Nira-san has been indispensable in my journey so far.
"I'll be looking forward to your comments, Nira-san."
With so much gratitude welling up within me, I give Nira-san a long reply. After I hit the reply button, I stare up at the ceiling. I recall back to when I first started writing this particular story. I was starting to become aware that chuunibyou readers were abundant, so I continued to write isekai stories. Reincarnating into another world, God mode Cheats, freely moving between classes, the ability to slow the opponent's movement, being exiled from the party, etc.
Of course writing something that appeals directly to the core audience of the site garnered a lot of views and comments. That served as motivation for me to finish the series. And yet, I still wasn't able to get published. Theoretically speaking, if I needed a 10 to get published, I would always hover around the 5 or 6 mark. The main reason is because I lack any sort of practice. In the end, the stories that do break through and get published are written differently from mine.
It's hard to put into words but the stories are not just about reincarnating and transferring, but there's a lot of emotion behind everything. The readers will rage when something bad happens, will cry and feel their chest hurt when something sad happens. And when the readers are finished, they'll come out feeling giddy, their mind preoccupied with what happened. It's sort of vague, but that's how I think it works.
Everyone is given the same characters and kanji to work with to create a story. But those who are able to manipulate those characters in a way to ensnare the readers are the most powerful, and in a way, that's just like magic. I still don't have that ability to breath such magic into my work just yet. I keep on pondering just how I can accomplish that feat, but after many years of absorbing knowledge and toiling over the answer, I still haven't found anything.
Like being trapped in a maze, I realized that if I kept writing isekai stories, I would just be at a standstill. It felt exhausting writing in the same style over and over. It's like having to dig holes over and over again, it's pointless and frankly torture.
In order to refresh my mind and spirits, I started writing a modern romance story. When I was in elementary school, I used to write romance stories all the time, so this was familiar territory for me. I remember in the library, there was a novel, Kino's Journey, that I wanted to emulate. Back then, I was writing instinctively, without thinking about the hard stuff. Looking back, my writing was really spotty, and the way I built up a story was pretty suspect too. Even so, Rin was really interested in that story. But I'll say one thing for sure, compared to now, I used to write more vividly back then.
That's why I thought for my current work that I would focus on the end result as opposed to all the small details. Compared to the isekai stories I wrote before, it was nowhere near as popular, but I had a lot more fun writing it. It helped remind me of all the important emotions I should have put into my work in the first place.
"But..."
The warmup is over, I have to jump straight into the fray now. If I want to become a pro, I have to write an isekai story as my next work. Otherwise, I won't be noticed. In terms of isekai, the quality for a first time writer can widely vary. However, I've been writing for five years already, that should be more than enough. If I become popular, it should logically follow that I would continue to enjoy writing it. And yet, reality isn't always so convenient.
Supply and demand can quickly change depending on the current market. What is popular and what's not will always change. And for the upper echelons, popularity is limited and narrow. On Syosetu, the isekai genre is probably the heaviest hitter in terms of popularity. If what you enjoy writing matches with the demands of the market, then you're in good fortunes, and you'll be enjoying yourself a lot more. But for me, it's not like that. I do enjoy writing, but writing isekai is not one of them.
It's simple, really. If it's a choice between popularity or personal enjoyment, I'll take popularity any day. I look at the "Realization of a Dream" charm on my desk light. I can feel my body getting fired up. Well then, I'll be jumping into the carnage again, no matter how long it takes, I'll find a way to make it out on top. I'll become an author no matter what. With new found resolve, I open up the word processor and make a new folder "Next Work". I start tapping away at the keyboard.
"Huh...?"
All of sudden, I feel a weird sensation throughout my body, like my stomach turned inside out. The characters in the screen start bending in all sorts of directions. My brain feels all groggy, my head is pulsating like crazy. Even though my fingers are on the keyboard, they're frozen solid, not moving at all. It's not just my fingers, it feels like my whole body is trapped in a glacier. I remember experiencing this before. Every time I finish a work and start a new one, this sensation would hit me every time. It's a nihilistic feeling, I can intuitively feel it. Whenever I try to write, my brain would shut down on me.
"If I don't write... that would be bad..."
I try to will myself to start typing, but it's pointless. It was like my whole body was revolting against my brain, not wanting to give in at all. For nearly an hour, I was living a hellish fever dream, battling against myself. I guess I won't write anything today...
Like I'm a car out of fuel, my body is losing all of its functions.
"I'll go to bed..."
It'll be better if I rest up. Lately, I've been pushing myself too much and now that I've finished this series, my body feels all weak. It'll be fine though, I'm sure tomorrow I'll be able to write. I think to myself as I slip into my futon.
It ended up being a long sleepless night. However, I have to start writing tomorrow or else.
But the next day was the same, I didn't write a single thing. I stayed in bed because of a fever.