John, I called out to my lover, am right here, he answered.
Not that am complaining, but how did you know I was here?
I look for you in your other apartment, the landlord said you were gone, so I know that you have to be here, am guessing you running away again.
I mean after all that went down, I have a feeling you wouldn't want to stay here anymore.
look am not trying to make you feel guilty about anything, it takes two to messed up, and am not going to make you look like a bad guy in my mess up situations, I hate it you, when I went home seeing my wife, and kids crying, it breaks my heart to shredded, and I know no amount of money or apologies can fix this pain at all, I fuck up and there no going back from there.
I know we just fling but I start to care for you a lot more than I should and I hate myself for it, so if you want to stay here I won't complain, but one thing that I know my wife come from a very important and strictly powerful family, her brother Micheal Evan's is not the one to play with and trust me when I say, he doesn't need to pull a bullet to kill someone, his name is enough to make it happen. And knowing my wife she probably telling her family what going on, and if she's not I don't want her to put something on your record or name, so I know someone in L.A he will help you out, new name, new social security, it like building a new person, I just want you to stay as low as you can, New York is not as far toward LA, we will discuss everything out while am here, and help you out to get the best deal possible, but promise me one thing, be happy on your own, change for yourself, because I don't want to ever see you like this again, you a beautiful woman, and I know there good somewhere in your heart, so please lead your life for the better.
I look at John and I realize is intentions was pure and genuine, I walk up to him and hug him, thank you for that, I really didn't want to run away but you right, for now on I want to be better, being a good person, maybe good things will come my way.
Good John responded, now let get us ready, we have a lot to plan.
Like what I walk behind him, am still sore, but after that shower, the pills, and a good food, rest, am feeling more energized than usual today, and am forever thankful for that man.
Shopping, I know you have a bank account right, and the talk with Jonathan about meeting you in LA, you will be leaving in 3 weeks so we have to make sure you get your stuff ready.
You doing all that for me, why I mean all I did is fuck you and ruin your life.
Listen to me Kathy, he pulled me closer, sitting down with me on the couch, you didn't ruin my life I did it on my own, I know what I was doing and yet I still participated in that activity, am a grown man, yes you did tempted me but yet I still allow you close on my own, am hurt, yes, do I feel guilty, yes nothing can ever go back being normal again, and I hate myself for it, I hate that I make promises to you knowing it will never happened, I hate that I fool my wife, gaslight her into thinking she was delusional, but you can't have your cake and eat it to, that my Karma and I will accept it all, but you, you young you don't deserve that, and I won't allow my actions lead toward you, I won't be able to live with it, so please don't ever blame yourself ok.
Wow, I really didn't expect that at all, John really is indeed a good person, and for some reason I really started to feel bad for everything I caused him, maybe his right, that is my second chance to be able to move on from my past mistakes, and move on with my life, new name, new identity, with a little bit of cash, in LA what can go wrong.
But what about you, I ask John, while sitting down next to him, how are you going to fix it all, with your wife telling her family do you think you will loose it all, I mean your job, your house, your kids, how will you ever be able to get them back.
I don't know, but I know she haven't called her family yet, because trust me her brother will have my head by now, and to be honest I wouldn't mind it, as long she could at least be happy, I love her you know, I know it sounds cliche knowing I hurt her that way, but I do, and I hate myself for hurting her, look let not talk about it, we have a nice quiet day, let not bring her into it, she's my personal problem and I will deal with it personally, ok.
Sure no worry, look we at the end of Manhattans, let go out, I want to eat dinner together with you for the last time, and I want it to be as beautiful as I can, where something sexy I have a wonderful idea for us tonight, he winks at me.
Oh shit, I never see that side of John before and to tell you the truth it turning me on, oh really what do you plan for us.
He get up and drag me up toward my closet, open it,
I turn to look at him, what you on about John, open it he smiles at me, I did, my eyes popped open, what the fuck, John how did you get it, I pull out the most beautiful red dress I ever seen, it look hella expensive to wear, let alone to go to a restaurant.
I turn around and face John questioning him with my eyes, what do you have in mind, and where are you taking me, because that is not just we going to a restaurant type of clothes, I hold the dress up, waiting for an answer,
Relax, trust me just wear it tonight, for me please, he baby eyes me,
I just shake my head, place the dress back where it was, and looking for a perfect shoes, and jewel to go with it, if John brought it for me, I guess he have a nice plan for us, and to be honest I couldn't wait to see where tonight leading us, and thinking about it, make my inside tingle with a sense of desire.