All was settled. The table in the middle of our living room with a white sheet, crystal glasses, fancy candelabrum...
The food just came and I was arranging plates and YunRea flowers.
-This is so pretty! - she was admiring white roses but I shrugged
- I don't like white flowers, it reminds me of death somehow.
She looked at me
- So which flower you like? - I smiled putting one plate on the table
- Hmm maybe red ones.. - When I turned to take more plates I hit on someone's chest and looked up - Jun!- My heart started beating fast- You..you came...
He gave me a bottle of red wine
- I bought this, it's good I choose red.- He was smiling showing his white teeth but I felt like someone sucked all the oxygen from the room.
-Jun come here and help me with this vase- YunRea was struggling. He went there and they both lifted a big vase with beautiful wildflowers arrangement. My fists squeezed and finally, I took a deep breath walking slowly back to the kitchen on my shaky legs.
-It's getting worse every time I see him. After I find my white scarf I had mixed feelings. One part of me wanted to wake him up and ask if he really my black angel, but the other part wanted to wait more and give him a chance to tell me on its own. That part was stronger! I put back my scarf and pretend as nothing happened.
Lying beside him I watched him with different eyes. He is the one who saved me! He always keeps an eye on me, he took care of me, he calls me baby.. my little girl...
Hearing his equal and calm breathing I wished I could stay calm as he, but now I know how could I? How could I pretend I don't know?!
Closing my eyes I left a sigh. Even tho I was trembling from the excitement of this discovery my heart was calm. How strange! Just a moment ago it beat so fast.
My eyes landed on his sleepy face again. I wished I could see his smile it gives him angelic look. - My black angel, my savior...
Watching him like that and hearing his breathing I become sleepy too. Just a moment before I slept I felt his hand holding mine. His warm palm touching mine, his fingers intertwine with mine...
That must've been a dream..?
-HyeMin!! -YunRea was calling and I turned
-Yes?
- Where did you go, I've been calling you five times ?!
-Sorry I didn't hear you, I spaced out. What did you want to tell me? - She shook her head
- I need more plates. Father just called and said more people will come.
-More?! So far we have twenty I think..
- Yes but his business partner will come with his daughter. He said she is your company's trainee, maybe you know her?- I shrugged
- I barely see any of them as you know I'm at the office most of the time sending orders. - She folded her arms
- Yeah that Mira is a real witch if you ask me! She needs to chill sometimes!
-She is very ambitious and capable. I think the boss likes her. He likes young people who work hard and improve themselves daily and she is a perfect example of that.- Yunrea rolled her eyes
- Yeah right! It's easy to achieve things if someone working that hard for you.
- It was my choice to stay there and I really want that job!- She hugged me
- You know I'm on your side, that is why I get mad if someone is using you...
We heard the doorbell and she went to open it and I stayed alone with my own thoughts.
- Ugh that boy really forces me to lose my senses! What shall I do now? Is it right if I keep pretending that I don't know anything?
-Don't frown like that you will become ugly! - He was beside me talking close to my ear. His voice sent chills down my spine. The sensitive skin on my neck felt his warm breath.
I moved away not daring to look at him- You just come and go like a ghost! Are you a ghost Jun?
- He laughed- Maybe I am who knows!
- I don't like ghosts.- He folded his arms supporting his back on the kitchen door looking so relaxed and amused that I wanted to slap his face with that smirk. His eyes on me made me feel nervous.
- Why? - he asked
- Because ghosts are cold, don't have a soul and they don't care about others' feelings...- He nodded
- You are right, but ghosts are there to protect and keep an eye on us.- I looked at him
- I would rather have a real person who will do that for me.
He looked away- Real persons have complicated lives, they have duties and obligations... it's better to be a ghost!
-HyeMin!- YunRea was calling me and I went to her leaving him there. His words touched me. I knew he was talking about himself, but what he said made me become more curious. He is a real mystery, hiding his feeling so well! What obligations and duties he was talking about? He probably meant his career...
People started coming and soon our living room was full. YunReas father sat with his business partners and their wives when I heard another doorbell. He said he is expecting his new partner and his daughter. I opened and let them in. The man was tall and well mannered in a perfect gray suit and his daughter was about my age. Her small face and big black eyes gave her a doll-like look. She bowed just a little looking at me with curiosity. I guess she was surprised to see the color of my eyes because she stared at me so intensely that I felt uncomfortable. YunReas father greeted them and led Mr.Prak, which was the name of that tall man, to the living room to sat with others. The girl was looking around and I wanted to show her chair but she smiled seeing Jun and went to him. That caught me by surprise but yet if she was really a trainee they must've known each other. I shrugged and went back to the kitchen, it seems that place becomes my safe haven. On the way in I looked myself in the mirror. A simple black dress with short sleeves, my straight hair falling down my back, very little makeup, and high heels were all I got. Lookin' at that girl I unintentionally compared her to myself. She was in a long red dress with her curly hair, perfect makeup, and a smile that never came off of her face... I left a sigh
- HyeMin you aren't her league, she is a future star and you are just a part-time worker... Even her name Stella meant star!
After aperitive was served we all sat by the table. James was helping me to bring food and he was so kind to me. My mood went down the moment I saw Stella sitting next to Jun but I would never admit that to myself. I sat across them but more to the left side next to James. He was trying to make me laugh and I tried not to look in their direction. One time I met Jun's eye. They were so dark and mysterious. But in the next moment, he was looking at Stella with the brightest smile like he never looked at me.- Oh no! I'm becoming jealous!!- I wanted to be her, I wanted him to look at me like that... I wanted....wake up HyeMin! He was only playing with you. He would take your heart and crush it like when you pull a delicate flower and throw it into the mud after you get tired of playing with...
As the evening goes by, conversation by the table became more relaxed but that doesn't help me. I felt uneasy and kinda expecting something bad to happen.
YunJin was really trying hard to make me smile and I did few times just reassure him that I was ok. YunRea looked at me with a worried look, I guess she felt something, but I was the best actress that night. Acting like I was having a good time and all that with a false smile. In one moment Stella lift her glass
- Fill me more wine- she said with a bossy tone which bothered me but I decided to ignore it. I took a bottle and wanted to pour wine when I saw a glittering reflection on her finger, she had a golden star-shaped ring. I frowned trying to remember when I saw that ring and it came to me. At the party, I was in the bathroom and one girl dropped her lipstick. That was her?? But clearly, I remembered her words. She wanted Jun! Not because she liked him but because she wanted to use him and get her popularity.
-Yah! - She screamed- What are you doing?!- Her voice brought me back to reality. I was pouring wine and it started to spill on the table and down her hand all the way to her dress
- I'm sorry... my cheeks become red from embarrassment. Jun stand up and took napkins to clean her hand looking at me frowned. I lowered my eyes and sat back on my chair. Wanting to slap myself- Just what I need, another embarrassment in front of him. I stood up excusing myself and went to the kitchen.
- Here is where I belong! What was I thinking back there? Like he would ever care for me...But I had to tell him what I heard, I had to warn him... It doesn't matter if he hates me after... just don't want to see him get hurt or used.
Taking a deep breath I wanted to go back but James came
- Are you ok HyeMin? I see you are not in the mood the whole night forcing yourself... - Little smile appeared on my face
- I'm ok, maybe I look like that because I'm tired...
He came closer and hugged me suddenly- I want to see you smiling again.. - I moved from his hug only to meet Jun's eyes. He was holding used napkins wanting to throw them but he stood there for a second looking at me. I opened my mouth to say something but he just left without saying a word. - What a mess!
James reached for my hand but I turned pretending I wanted to drink water
- Why don't you tell me what is wrong HyeMin? You know I'm here for you always!- I nodded
- Thank you for that but I'm fine really, except I'm tired. It was a busy week and I had a lot to do... now excuse me I need to take something from my room- Passing by him I went straight to my room and sat on the bed
- All this has to stop! I don't need this kind of thing in my life!!.... tears started to roll down my face without my knowing. I felt them on my fingers when I wanted to fix my hair. My eyes look for my reflection in the mirror
- Who is this girl with sad teary eyes?HyeMin you can do better than this! You can be like a sea that can turn mountains into rocks! There is nothing you can't do, so get up, wipe your tears and go tell Jun what you heard!!
So I came back to the living room and went straight to Jun. He looked at me without interest
- I need to talk to you it's important! - He gets up and followed me to my room where we could talk in peace.
- What do you want?- He folded his arms pinning me with those black eyes without mercy.
- I have to tell you something...- my voice was quiet but I took a deep breath and continue. - It's about Stella...- He lifted his hand stopping me from speaking further
- You were acting like a child there. I thought you are smarter than that. - My eyebrows frowned
- I had a reason calling you here ... and I'm not a child !- He smiled sarcastically
- Am I that adorable to you so you can't stand seeing another girl next to me?- I rolled my eyes wanting to slap him once more on that self-loved face!
- I said I have to tell you something important about her. When we were at the party I accidentally heard her and her friend talking about you. They had plan or bet to use you and gain popularity through you! - Realising that I was yelling I covered my mouth and turned around wanting to leave but he holds my hand and made me face him
- Why do you care about that?- I shrug
- Because I don't like people who are using others.
- How do you know I don't use others too?- he asked lowering his head closer
- You are not...
A smile appeared on his face- I'll be fine don't worry- I nodded leaving the room but when I was at the door he called my name quietly
- HyeMin!- I turned looking at him- Thank you for believing in me...- My cheeks turn red so I left the room in a hurry. His quiet voice and those black eyes made me weak and I needed to hide again.
When dinner was over, our guests started to leave one by one. I was bringing them their coats saying goodbyes with a smile. James was beside me helping me. Stella was hanging on Jun's hand and I needed all my strength to keep my calm and not to slap her.
- Oh my God! What's with me and my needs to slap people this evening??!! I never felt like this before so my reactions were strange to me. Jun took her fur coat and helped her put it on but his eyes were on me provoking me like that.
I clenched my teeth and turned to James with a bright smile
- James, can you get me that hat up there I can't reach it? He smiled happily and turned back. While he was reaching up I notice a bandage on his left arm
- Did you hurt your arm?- I asked with worry but he pulled his sleeve down still smiling
- I was clumsy but it's nothing serious.
- He gave me a hat and went outside saying goodbye in a hurry. My eyes turned to Jun instinctively. He was looking at the door with a frown. I knew he saw that too but there were more people around us so I didn't say anything.
I had a lot of questions in my mind but that had to wait some other time... On his way out he brushed hair strain from my face and smiled- You looked beautiful tonight...
Next thing he was gone leaving me there standing with all that mess in my head...
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