CHARLIE'S POV
"Girls! Dinner is ready!" Dad shouted from downstairs. I groaned as Demi got out of my bed. She held her hand out for me and I reluctantly grabbed ahold of it. I don't want to eat, but I want to go to those places tonight.
"I don't know if I can do this, Dems." I whimpered as we went downstairs.
"Charlie, you can do this. I'm going to be by your side the entire time, okay?" Demi stood in front of me at the bottom of the steps as she looked at me. "I believe in you, baby girl." She held both of my hands as she tried to reassure me.
"I don't want to get any fatter, Demi.." I whispered. Demi had a sad look on her face as she pulled me into her embrace.
"You're already so skinny, Charlie. It's too dangerous to be as skinny as you are." Demi had tears in her eyes.
"You're just saying that cause I'm your sister.."
"I'm not saying it just because I'm your sister. I care about you and I don't like seeing you hurt yourself." Demi told me. I just shrugged. "Let's go eat, yeah?"
"Yeah.." I spoke quietly. Demi grabbed my one of my hands again and led me to the table.
"It smells so good." Demi practically drooled as we walked into the dining room. I wish I could say the same.
"There's ham, mashed potatoes, and butter noodles." Mom pointed to everything. I gulped as Demi gave my hand a reassuring squeeze. I sat down next to her and Demi ended up making me a plate. It consisted of two pieces of ham, a small spoonful of mashed potatoes, and a scoop of butter noodles.
"Eat." Demi whispered in my ear as I kept pushing food around on my plate. I sighed as I slowly took a bite of ham, causing me to gag.
'You're getting fatter. Stop eating.'
"I.. I can't.." I whimpered.
"Yes, you can. Just a little more. Okay, baby?" Demi rubbed her thumb on the back of my hand. I looked around the table and saw Mom with a sad expression on her face. I quickly turned my gaze back to Demi.
"Help me.." I looked at her with tears in my eyes.
"Of course." Demi pulled me onto her lap like I was a little kid again. She ended up feeding me like a baby, which kind of helped, but the demons were still screaming at me.
"I.. I'm full, Dem Dem." I spoke quietly, holding back tears.
"You did great, baby girl." Demi spoke comfortingly and kissed my forehead. I looked at how much I ate, which was a little less than half. Some of the tears I've been holding in rolled down my cheeks.
"Aww, baby. Don't cry." Mom spoke up from the other side of the table.
"Why are you crying, Char?" Demi questioned.
"I.. It's nothing. I'm fine." I reassured her quickly. Demi wiped away some of my tears with the pad of her thumb. "Can we go to those places now?" I asked in a soft tone.
"Of course, go get some shoes on." Demi commanded.
I got up off her lap and ran to the shoe closet, grabbing a pair of black Vans. I looked towards the bathroom, having the urge to purge. Ha, that rhymed. I looked over at Demi and saw her keeping a close eye on me. I sighed, knowing I wasn't going to be able to get away with purging.
"Are you ready?" Demi asked me after I put on my shoes and tied them.
"Yep." I told her. She nodded and opened up the front door, holding it open for me. I walked out and went to her car, getting into the front seat.
"Where do you want to go, Char?" Demi questioned as she got in the driver's seat and started the car.
"Can we go to the cemetery first?" I asked, biting my lip nervously. Demi nodded as she backed out of the driveway and drove towards the cemetery.
"Why did you want to come to the cemetery?" Demi finally asked when we arrived at there.
"I want to see Riley's headstone.." I replied quietly, starting to choke up a bit.
"It should be this way." Demi slung her arm around my shoulder and led the way. It may be small, but I'm happy she remembers where it was. I know she went to Riley's funeral to support me, well, all of us. I honestly thought she would forget where it was.
"Hey, Ri Ri." I whispered when we arrived at Riley's headstone. I sat down in front of it and picked out some grass from the ground. "Everything isn't the same without you. I miss you." I tried to hold back tears.
"Charlie, you can let it out." Demi spoke quietly as she set down next to me.
"P-Please come back, Riley." I choked out, tears finally starting to form. "I.. I need you now more than ever.."
DEMI'S POV
"Why did you want to come to the cemetery?" I asked Charlie as we arrived there.
"I want to see Riley's headstone.." Charlie replied quietly. You can easily tell she was holding back tears. I never heard Charlie talk about Riley in a while, but she's been trying to put up this façade that she's fine for almost two or three years now.
"It should be this why." I slung my arm around Charlie and began leading the way.
- FLASHBACK -
The year was 2017 and I was on my way home to go see my family. The time Max, my bodyguard, and I arrived it was about 5:30 PM. When I entered, Charlie came down the stairs crying and towards the front door, which I so happened to enter.
Charlie! What's wrong?" I asked worriedly as I stopped her from going out the door. I picked Charlie up in my embrace.
"Let me go!" Charlie tried getting out of my arms. "I need to see if Riley is okay!" She sobbed.
"Shh, Charlie." I spoke comfortingly as Charlie kept trying to get her to let go of me. What did I miss?
"S-She can't be gone.." Charlie whimpered as she eventually got tired of fighting against me and relaxed in my embrace. Mom and Eddie rushed downstairs, relieved to see that I had Charlie in my arms.
"I'll take her." Eddie whispered. I noticed she fell asleep in my arms as I handed her over to him. Eddie then went upstairs with Charlie.
"What happened, Mama?" I questioned after I hugged her.
"Do you remember Riley? Charlie's best friend." Mom asked me.
"Of course, I do." I answered.
"Well.." Mom started speaking, picking at her fingernails in the process. "Riley ended up killing herself.." She was kind of blunt about it, but not completely.
"What? Really?" I was shocked. "Why?"
"I guess the main reason was that she was being bullied by some kids at school."
"What were their names?" I asked. I didn't need to know, but I was curious.
"I believe their names were Trent, Lucas, Daniel, and Harper." Mom answered. I nodded as her and I kept talking about what happened when I was away.
- FLASHBACK OVER -
I always have been wondering why Trent's name sounded familiar when she mentioned who was bullying her a week or two ago, but now I know why.
Hey, Ri Ri." Charlie when we arrived at Riley's headstone. Charlie sat down in front of it and began picking out some grass from the ground. "Everything isn't the same without you. I miss you." She was trying to hold back tears.
"Charlie, you can let it out." I spoke quietly as i set down next to her.
"P-Please come back, Riley." Charlie choked out, tears finally starting to form in her eyes. "I.. I need you now more than ever.." Charlie whimpered.
It hurt to see Charlie so broken. I wish I could mend the broken parts of her back together and make her happy. No one deserves to go through the shit she has been going through recently.
"I.. I'm done here.." Charlie wiped away some tears as she stood up.
"Are you sure? We can always stay longer if you would like to." I stood up also.
"I'm good.." Charlie whispered. "Can we go to the last place now?"
"Yes, where do you want to go next?" I asked Charlie as we headed towards the car.
"Can we go to the beach you took me to?"
"Of course, we can." I smiled at her.
CHARLIE'S POV
"Yes, where do you want to go next?" Demi asked me as we headed towards the car.
"Can we go to the beach you took me to?" I looked at her with hopeful eyes.
"Of course, we can." Demi smiled at me.
- FLASHBACK -
"Why are we at a beach at night?" I asked, raising one of my eyebrows. I looked at Demi and it looked like she was reminiscing.
"Mom used to bring me here when I was younger all the time. It was during my teenage years and when I was struggling. She would take me here, no matter what time it was and we would just sit on the beach and talk if I wanted to." Demi answered my question.
"Really?" I asked as we walked onto the beach. Demi nodded as she led me to a spot and sat down.
"This is where her and I would sit every time." Demi said as she motioned me to sit down next to her. "I probably should've brought towels." She smiled sheepishly.
"It doesn't bother me." I reassured her. "You never fully explained why we're here." I spoke up.
"I just thought we could sit here and talk. Just like how Mom and I used to, or we could just sit here and not talk." Demi suggested.
"It's really pretty." I told Demi as I looked at the moon that started to rise over the water.
"It really is." Demi replied to my comment. "Is there anything you want to talk about?" She asked and looked over at me.
"I don't know.." I shrugged.
"What's on your mind? I want to help you, baby girl."
"I don't deserve the help." I whispered.
"Charlotte Jade." Demi stated sternly. "You do deserve the help. You're so worthy of life and happiness, and it hurts that you can't see it."
"I don't know about that.." I replied, trying not to cry.
"Charlie, you can cry. You don't always have to hold in your emotions and act like you're fine. Please.. what's on your mind?"
"A lot I guess." I answered truthfully. Demi looked at me, giving me the signal to continue. I sighed as I stood up and walked towards the water.
"For several years, I haven't been happy. Everyday, I feel like I'm getting worse and worse. It's like there's a war going on in my mind and it never stops. I get tormented by Trent and his friends everyday. It hurts.. it really fucking hurts. I guess that's when I started harming myself because it took the pain away." I picked up a few rocks and threw one of them in the water.
"They told me I was too fat and they told me no one liked me because of that reason. They told me that's why you didn't like me, Dems. I believed them and so I slowly stopped eating altogether. Whenever I did eat, I would purge after." I threw another rock.
"Trent and them all started getting physical. They beat me up everyday for a year now." I threw two more rocks.
"Then the other night.. getting my innocence stolen is icing on the cake." I laughed a bitter laugh as I threw another two rocks.
"I'm too used to putting up a façade. I forgot what it's truly like to be happy. Why am I never happy?" I angrily threw the last of the rocks, my anger then turning into sadness and emptiness. "I sometimes stay up thinking and wondering if I'm better off dead. I keep thinking everyone and myself would be happier."
I rubbed at my cheeks, hoping that it would help stop my tears from falling. I eventually gave up knowing that it wouldn't work. Sobs take over my body, which made it hard to breathe. I turned around and saw Demi running towards me. Tears are streaming down my face as she came over to me. "W-Why can't I be happy, Demi?!" I sobbed as I fell into Demi's embrace.
"Shh, shh." Demi held onto me as she rubbed my back.
"It hurts, Dem Dem!" I cried out as I held onto her like a lifeline. "Why can't I stop hurting? I want to be happy."
"I got you, baby girl." Demi whispered soothingly as she held me tighter than before. "I'm going to help you. Don't worry, Charlie. You'll be happy again soon.."
"I love you, Dems." I mumbled.
- FLASHBACK OVER -
Once we arrived at the beach, Demi and I went to the spot we sat at last time. Of course, we didn't have towels again.
"I miss her, Dems." I told her once both of us got comfortable.
"Riley?" Demi asked, wanting to confirm that I was talking about missing Riley.
"It's been three years today, Dems.." I whispered, my voice cracking slightly. "None of you guys remembered.."
"I'm so sorry, Char." Demi immediately pulled me into her arms. "I knew something was today, but I didn't think it was that."
"Why did she do it?" I questioned, having no control over my tears. "Why did she leave me?"
"I don't know, Charlie. I really don't know, baby girl." Demi spoke comfortingly as she continued to hold me in her arms.
"Sometimes.. I just want to end it all.. so I can be happy and be with her.." I told her. It's like I couldn't hold in any of my secrets anymore. "I want to be happy, Dem Dem."
"But if you ended it all, we would all be sad without you." Demi stroked my hair.
"That's why I haven't.." I replied. "Yet.." I mumbled the last part, hoping she wouldn't hear.
"Yet?" Demi questioned, worry lacing her voice. "Please, Charlie. If you have any of those urges to end your life or harm yourself in anyway, come to me. Please, baby girl. I don't want to lose my baby sister. Especially when there's a way I can prevent it. Please.." Demi practically begged.
"Okay.." I wiped away some of my tears. "Can we go home now.." I told her, since it was starting to get dark out.
Demi agreed and stood up, holding her hand out for me. I gladly accepted it and held onto her hand as we went to the car. It's hard to believe Demi and I are leaving for LA tomorrow already. I bet it's going to be fun, but I'll definitely miss our family. I climbed into the front seat and buckled my seatbelt. Feeling exhausted from today, I ended up falling asleep on the way back home.
A/N: I made a sequel to Help Me, Mom if you guys want to go read it.
Description:
"Solitary - (adj) done or existing alone.
Fourteen year old Skylar Mae Valderrama is the daughter of Wilmer and Demi. It's been fifteen years since her elder sister, Alexis Grace Lovato killed herself. Her parents are finally managing to live a somewhat normal life.
Now, you may think since her Mother and Father are both famous that she lives a great life, however, you'd be wrong. Skylar, or Sky, is aware that she had an older sister but she doesn't know how she died. Little does Skylar know that she's following in the same path as Alex.
Will Demi and Wilmer see the signs before it's too late? Can either of them help her before she spirals down further in the never ending bottomless pit of her mind? Or will she share the same fate as her sister.."