ALEX'S POV
Mom called Maddie and Dallas to come over. They agreed and we all decided to stay in and watch movies in the living room. I sat in between Mom and Maddie. I was zoned out, thinking about how I trusted Max.
- FLASHBACK -
"Well." She sighed. "Max and I are dating." She said hesitantly.
"You guys are?" I asked shocked. I don't know how I feel about this. Am I going to have a father figure in my life that won't hurt me?
"Are you okay with that, baby girl?" She asked, looking me in the eyes.
"Of course! If you guys make each other
happy then go for it!" I smiled at them and reassured them. "Does this mean I'm going to have a father figure in my life that won't hurt me?" I asked, full of hope.
"I will never hurt you, Alex. All of them that hurt you, don't deserve to be alive right now. I promise that I'll never hurt you." Max came over to me and reassured me. I smiled as I hugged him.
"I trust you." I smiled. "I trust you is better than I love you because you may not always trust the person you love but you can always love the person you trust." I quoted.
- FLASHBACK OVER -
I got out of my mind and I decided to go on Instagram. I looked at what I was tagged in and what I saw hurt. They said I was a fat ass and that I should kill myself.
- TRIGGER WARNING -
I quickly got off the couch and ran off to my bathroom. I locked the door and grabbed my meds and opened the bottle and grabbed my blade.
DEMI'S POV
I noticed Alex's mood change very quickly. Her mood went from zoned out to sad and hurt. The mood I knew all too well. She ran upstairs shutting the familiar door that belongs to her bathroom.
"I'll be back." I stated quickly, running upstairs to Alex's bathroom. As usual, it was locked.
"Alex, open up! Please, baby girl." I knocked on the door.
ALEX'S POV
"Alex, open up! Please, baby girl." Mom knocked on the door of my bathroom. I had scattered pills on the floor and my arms were full of cuts. I didn't take any of the pills yet. I picked up a handful in my hand and before I could do anything Mom spoke up.
"I'm coming in!" I heard her voice and the door unlock. Nothing could stop the mess I created, so I sat on the floor, pills still in my hand, and I was violently shaking. She walked in and gasped.
"M-Mama, I.. I.." I choked out as. She slowly knelt down in front of me and took the pills out of my hand and put them on the bathroom counter. "I-I'm sorry. P-Please, don't hate m-me.." I whispered.
"Shh, I'll never hate you." She spoke gently as she pulled me into her embrace, not caring that blood was getting on her clothes. "You keep saying you'll talk to me, but you never do. Why, baby girl?" She asked, her voice cracking slightly.
"I-I don't want to u-upset you.. or t-trigger you.." I mumbled as I hid my face.
"You won't upset or trigger me. What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" Mom asked as she cleaned my wrists.
- TRIGGER WARNING -
"I'm not beautiful. Why can't I be beautiful and perfect like you, Aunt Maddie, Aunt Dallas, and Grandma?" I looked her in the eyes as I was crying. She had a sad expression on her face.
"You are beautiful, baby girl. You're the most gorgeous person I know. I'm not saying that just because I'm your Mother. It breaks my heart that you don't see that you're beautiful, baby girl. You don't have to be perfect like me, Aunt Maddie, Aunt Dallas, and Grandma. Don't compare yourself to others. You are amazing just the way you are, baby." She replied.
"But I'm not! Why can't you see I'm fat and ugly?! I'm a freak and I'm not talented like any of you! I hate my body, I hate everything about me! I hate myself!" I cried out, my voice cracking.
"Alexis Grace Lovato! That is NOT true. You are way too skinny! It's unhealthy to be this skinny, baby girl. I can feel your ribs and your collar bone is sticking out. Your wrist looks like it has no skin, it's frail. What you're doing is not healthy, baby girl. Please.. please believe me when I say you're beautiful and perfect inside and out, baby." She said as she pulled me into a hug.
"I-I'm sorry, Mama." I sobbed into the crook of her neck.
"We love you, Alex!" The familiar voices of Maddie and Dallas exclaimed. Next thing I knew, we were in a group hug.
"I-I love you guys too." I smiled. As we stayed in the group hug, I was thinking about what Mom said. Deep down somewhere in my mind, I knew what she was saying was true and what I was doing wasn't healthy. But am I really worth recovery though?