ALEX'S POV
"Mom! I need you!" I shout from my Mom's old music room she has at Grandma and Grandpa's. I was working on trying to write a song because Scooter said we should have a mini concert. We're doing it because most fans are disappointed we cancelled for a bit to get everything situated with my "Dad". I don't understand why they can't understand that we need to deal with this before anything else.
"You shouted?" Mom asked walking in. I nodded as I was sitting at the piano.
"I think I finished writing my song. Can you listen to it before I decide if I want to sing it at the concert or not?" I asked nervously.
"Of course!" She smiled and sat next to me.
"It might be a little personal.."
"Whenever you're ready, baby girl." She told me. I started playing the piano.
Father, I'm gonna say thank you
Even if I'm still hurt
Oh, I'm gonna say bless you
I wanna mean those words
Always wished you the best
I, I prayed for your peace
Even if you started this
This whole war in me
You did your best or did you?
Sometimes I think I hate you
I'm sorry, dad, for feelin' this
I can't believe I'm sayin' it
I know you were a troubled man
I know you never got the chance
To be yourself, to be your best
I hope that someone will give you
A second chance
Father, I'm gonna say thank you
Even if I don't understand
Oh, you left us alone
I guess that made me who I am
Always wished you the best
I, I, I pray for your peace
Even if you started this
This whole war in me
You did your best or did you?
Sometimes I think I hate you
I'm sorry, dad, for feelin' this
I can't believe I'm sayin' it
I know you were a troubled man
I know you never got the chance
To be yourself, to be your best
I hope that someone will give you
You did your best or did you?
Sometimes I think I hate you
I'm sorry, dad, for feelin' this
I can't believe I'm sayin' it
I know you were a troubled man
I know you never got the chance
To be yourself, to be your best
I hope that someone will give you
A second chance
(A/N: I know Demi wrote this.. but pretend she didn't 😂)
At the end of the song I was crying. Fuck these emotions. I was pulled into the familiar scent of my Mom.
"That was beautiful, baby girl." She whispered in my ear as she rocked me back and forth in her arms.
"Thank you." I smiled at her as she wiped away my tears with the pad of her thumb.
"We got to get ready for the concert tonight. Maybe wear some kind of dress or something?" Mom suggested.
"What about my cuts though?" I asked nervously.
"We can cover them with makeup." She said. "Now go get ready!" She shooed me upstairs and I giggled.
It took me an hour to pick out a pretty good outfit. I wanted to go sort of casual for the concert.
I put on a pair of dark blue, ripped skinny jeans. A Rolling Stones t-shirt that I stole from my Mom's closet. A jean jacket which I left unbuttoned. Then a pair of high top Vans. I reached into my pocket of my other pants to look at the note a fan gave me about a week ago.
I opened it and saw a drawing and right next to it, they wrote that it's supposed to be me. I crumpled it up and threw it on the floor. I paced back and forth, craving for that thin piece of metal against my skin.
"No, no, no!" I panicked as I kept pacing. "Where is it?!" I screamed as I tried looking for my blade, which wasn't anywhere. I fell to the floor while violently shaking.
DIANNA'S POV
"Mom, Eddie. I'm going to go get some tampons from the store. Can you watch Alex till I get back?" Demi said while grabbing her car keys.
"Of course!" I smiled at her as she walked out the door. Eddie and I were watching a movie in the living room when we heard Alex upstairs.
"No, no, no! Where is it?!" We both heard her shout. I was about to get up to go and check on her but Eddie stopped me.
"I'll go check on her. You just relax." He looked at me and went upstairs. A couple minutes later went by and he didn't come back down.
"DIANNA! We need you!" I heard Eddie shout from upstairs and I quickly went upstairs to both of them.
"Alex!" I exclaimed as I saw her curled up in the corner as she was having a panic attack. "Alex, look at me." I lifted her head up so she was looking at me.
"I.. I want M-Mommy.." She spoke in a whisper.
"Mommy isn't here right now, baby girl. She'll be back soon." As if on queue, Demi walked in to where we were.
DEMI'S POV
I got out of the car with my purse in one hand and my box of tampons in the other. I walked inside and took off my shoes and put my purse on the table. Mom and Eddie weren't downstairs so I went upstairs to see if they were with Alex.
"Alex!" I saw my baby in the corner having a panic attack when I entered the room, with Mom and Eddie trying to calm her down. "I got this from here." I told them as I quickly held Alex in my embrace. "Can one of you guys get my purse please?" I practically begged as I realized how fast pace her breathing was. About a minute later, Mom handed me my purse and left again.
"M-Mommy.." She choked out as she started playing with the rings on my fingers.
"Focus on me, baby girl." I ran my fingers through her hair and massaged her scalp as I grabbed her inhaler out of my purse. "Deep breathes, baby." I cooed as she used her inhaler. "Good job. Can you tell me what that was about?" I asked her.
"R-Remember when someone gave me t-that note last week?" She looked at me with tears in her eyes.
ALEX'S POV
"R-Remember when someone gave me t-that note last week?" I asked as I looked at her with tears in my eyes.
"Yes, I remember." She wiped away some of my tears with the pad of her thumb. I crawled over to where the crumpled piece of paper was and handed it to her.
"T-They said that is me, M-Mom! I.. Is it t-true?" I looked at her and she gasped when she looked at it.
"No! It's not true! You're perfect for who you are. There's only one Alexis Grace Lovato, which makes you perfect." She hugged me.
"I.. I wanted to cut so bad, mommy.. it was like my skin was itching for that thin piece of metal.." I whispered.
"I understand, baby.. please talk to any of us if you feel that way instead of trying to look for something.. okay?" She asked. I nodded. Mom pulled out her phone and started typing away. I got a Twitter notification because Mom tagged me in a tweet.
@ddlovato: Someone drew this for my daughter, @alexisgracelovato, and I am honestly disgusted by it. Please, I'm begging you to refrain from making this shit and giving it to my daughter, or anyone for that matter. Like I said before, words hurt more than you think.
"Are you finished getting ready? Max will be here soon." Mom finally spoke after a couple minutes of her just holding me.
"Yes.. I am." I said. She was about to let go and leave the room but I stayed holding onto her. "I'm not done cuddling you, Mom!" I fake whined and pouted.
"Aww, my baby girl." She cooed and carried me downstairs. Grandma saw us and took a photo on her phone of us. Mom and I sat on the couch watching YouTube while we waited for Max.