Chapter 26 - 26

ALEX'S POV

I opened my eyes and I was blinded by a really bright shade of white if that is even possible. I quickly closed my eyes.

"T-Turn the lights off." I croaked out.

"Baby! You're awake!" I heard my Mom's voice exclaim. I felt the bed I was laying in dip and next I know, my Mom is laying next to me.

"Why am I in the hospital-" I started talking then I remembered why I was in the hospital. "Oh.. yeah.. Trevor.." I quietly mumbled. Mom held me tight. I looked up and saw Kenzie and her mom. "You guys are here? Why?"

"You and your Mom are our friends now. Of course we had to stay until you woke up." Kenzie's mom said sitting down in one of the chairs.

"What about the song? I really wanted to record it today.." I looked up at Mom.

"You still can.. if you really want to. I don't want you to.. just promise if anything is bothering you while recording that you tell me." Mom said sternly. I nodded and hugged her tightly.

"When can I get out of here?" I asked.

"Doctor Garcia said whenever you woke up. They checked you out and everything." She spoke softly.

"I want to go now.. and record the song." I said sitting up, which made my head hurt a bit. "Agh.." I held my head.

"What's wrong, baby girl? Does your head hurt?" Mom asked frantically. I nodded as I winced in pain. She quickly pulled out a water bottle and some ibuprofen. I took two ibuprofen.

"Thanks.." I mumbled quietly. I held my arms out wanting to be carried out to the car. Mom picked me up and placed me on her hip. The paparazzi were going crazy when we walked out. "Mom! Make them stop!" I screamed and whimpered as I hid my face in the crook of her neck. The flashes hurt my eyes.

"Shh, it's okay. Mommy will protect you. Just breathe and count to ten like we practiced, baby girl." She cooed as she had her hand on the back of my head. We got to Kenzie's car because Mom didn't have hers. I got in the back with Kenzie while Mom sat up front with Kenzie's mom. I learned that her mom's name is Melissa.

I heard my phone go off, indicating I got a Twitter notification.

@ddlovato: Thank you all for your prayers. @alexisgracelovato is safe. Nothing too major. She still wants to record a song for you guys so that's what we are doing now ❤️

We arrived at the studio. I jumped out of the car and ran into the building.

"Alex! Take it easy!" Mom said sternly.

"I'm sorry. I'm just excited!" I smiled at her before getting into the recording booth with Kenzie.

"Whenever you're ready." The person who was helping us record said. Let's call him Jake because I never did learn his name.

They say she likes a good time

(My, oh my)

She comes alive at midnight

(Every night)

My mama doesn't trust her

(My, oh my)

She's only here for one thing

But (so am I)

Yeah

A little bit older

A black leather jacket

A bad reputation

Insatiable habits

She was onto me, one look and I couldn't breathe

Yeah, I said, "If you kiss me

I might let it happen"

I swear on my life that I've been a good girl

Tonight, I don't wanna be her

They say she likes a good time

(My, oh my)

She comes alive at midnight

(Every night)

My mama doesn't trust her

(My, oh my)

She's only here for one thing (let's go)

But (so am I)

Look, I'm the type to make her turn on her mommy

Mackenzie make her forget what she learned from her mommy

I don't be trippin on lil' shawty, I let her do whatever she please

I don't be kissin' on lil' shawty, she don't be kissin' on me either

She came with you and then left with me, I went up a point, let's call it even (yeah)

Don't like the car she in, gonna end up buying her a new Beamer (let's go)

That girl know what she want, she make me take it off when she see me (let's go)

She say I make her wet whenever my face pop up on TV

I had to say, "No disrespect, gotta do it safe or you can keep it"

Pop star, I'm fresh up out the trap and I'm goin' Bieber

She know I'm a call away, she can drop a pin and I come meet her

Stand next to me, you gon' end up catchin' a fever (yeah, yeah, yeah)

I'm hot (yeah)

I swear on my life that I've been a good girl (good girl, good girl)

Tonight, I don't want to be her

They say she likes a good time

(My, oh my)

She comes alive at midnight (she comes alive, oh every night)

(Every night)

My mama doesn't trust her

(My, oh my)

She's only here for one thing

But (so am I)

My, my, my, my, my, oh my

My mama doesn't trust you, baby

My, my, my, my, my, oh my

And my daddy doesn't know you, no

My, my, my, my, my, oh my

Oh, my, my, my, my, my, oh my

My, my, my, my, my, oh my

They say she likes a good time

(My, oh my)

She comes alive at midnight

(Every night)

My mama doesn't trust her

(My, oh my)

She's only here for one thing

But (so am I)

"That was amazing!" Jake exclaimed. I smiled excitedly and hugged Kenzie.

"Can I get your number? So we can stay in contact." Kenzie asked. I agreed and we traded phone numbers. We hugged each other goodbye.

"I have one more song I want to sing." I said from the recording booth. Mom and Jake agreed to let me record it.

Well I guess it's been a while

Since I've seen the sunshine

Since I have smiled

And me, who's so well versed

Is feeling so damn empty

Is at a loss for words

Forgot what it's like

To just feel okay

I'm praying for the day

When there is no more rain

And I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

Oh, and I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

(I don't wanna do anything but cry)

Well I hardly feel alive

I'm going through the motions

But I don't feel like trying

The hole in my heart is growing bigger by the day

I wish that I could crawl inside

Hide away

And I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

Oh, and I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

Oh, I'm so low

I'm almost to the bottom

And oh, nowhere to go

Even my soul has left my body

Oh, and I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

Oh, and I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

And I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

And I, I don't wanna do anything but cry

When I finished they both applauded. I thanked Jake for helping. I held my Mom's hand walking out to the tour bus.

"Today was eventful." I sighed and yawned right after. "I just want to sleep." I cried out as I plopped down on the bed in the bus.

"I know, baby. I know." Mom cooed as she laid down next to me. "You said you wanted to talk about something with me?" She asked gently.

"Yes.. I do." I replied and sat up.

"Whenever you're ready. There's nothing to worry about." She assured me and held my hands in hers.

I took a deep breath before talking. "I'm trying so hard, Mom. I'm trying to be happy.. it's just.. I don't know what's wrong with me.. I feel like a freak.." I say as I look away from her eyes.

"Nothing is wrong with you." She said as she made me look into her eyes. "Everything is going to be okay, baby girl." She held me in her embrace. "We'll get through this together. You're not a freak. You're not alone in any of this. I'm going to be with you every step of the way." She said before kissing my head and resting her head on top of mine.

"I.. I want to be alone.. but I'm not sure if I trust myself. Is it bad I don't trust myself?" I choked out.

"It's not necessarily bad. It's normal to not trust yourself alone right now. I'm going to stay by your side, baby girl."

"The demons are haunting me again.. I feel like I can't get a break from them, Mommy.." I whispered.

"What are they saying?" She asked as we were laying down and cuddling. She had a tight grip on me so I couldn't run off and do anything.

"They're saying I'm not good enough. They're saying I'm a mistake and that I don't deserve to live.. I had a dream last night.. where you didn't want me and my demons turned into actual people.. and they tried killing me.." I spilled out before some tears ran down my cheeks.

"You are good enough. You're NOT a mistake. You're perfect, baby. You're my baby girl and I don't know what I would do without you. I would never ever give you up. I would never even think about that. I'm glad you're talking about your emotions, baby girl. I love you. Try and get some sleep, yeah?"

"I love you too, Mom." I replied as I hugged her. "Goodnight."