A/N: Before you start reading. This whole chapter is basically a trigger warning. It involves a suicide attempt.
ALEX'S POV
We've been on tour for almost a month now. I love singing for my fans, but most "fans" I meet backstage are fans of my Mom and they don't like me. They just keep telling me to kill myself. That I'm a waste of space. The demons keep taunting me and I can't take it anymore. I just want to die.
"Alex! Max and I are making a Starbucks run. Want to stay here or come with?" Mom asked as I was putting my hair in a ponytail.
"I want to stay here. I'm not feeling too good." I say nonchalantly. Mom's instincts kicked in and she felt my forehead.
"You don't have a fever so that's good. Text me if you need anything!" She said kissing my forehead and then walking out the door of the tour bus. Perfect.
- TRIGGER WARNING -
I started writing on a piece of paper.
'Dear friends and family,
I love you all so much. I hope you all never have to feel your life crashing all around you. My mind and body are attacking me. The voices in my head are growing stronger and stronger. I feel like my heart is broken. I feel like I'm in a pit unable to climb out. I scream for help, but it's like no one can hear me. No one cares. I say "I'm fine!" In this world it's not okay to be broken. You put on a face and you go on. If you break down, you can't let anyone see it. Then the world starts spinning faster and faster, till you can't hold on. Till you can't fight the voices in your head. Until you give in.
I'm sorry I have to say goodbye like this. It's for the best. You all won't have to worry about me anymore. This world is better off without me anyway. Goodbye.
-Alex'
I wrote a separate one for Mom.
'Dear Mom,
I'm sorry I let you down. It wasn't my intention. I thought if I pretended to be happy, then maybe.. just maybe.. I would actually be happy. The demons keep coming back stronger and stronger. I feel like I tried everything. Cutting doesn't help anymore. I don't feel wanted in this world, Mama. Admit it, I'm a mistake. A man fucked you when you were drunk. You probably just kept me for the media because that is what everyone says. I want to believe you didn't. Maybe you do actually love me, but everyone makes me think otherwise. I'm sorry I'm leaving like this. Goodbye, Mom.
P.S. Release this song when I'm gone.. for my fans.. it will be the last time they hear me sing.
-Alex'
I got my phone camera out and pressed record. I wrote a song last night. I wanted to record it for my fans. My goodbye to them.
Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame
Be my friend, hold me
Wrap me up, enfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up and breathe me
Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found
Yeah I think that I might break
Lost myself again and I feel unsafe
Be my friend, hold me
Wrap me up, enfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up and breathe me
Be my friend, hold me
Wrap me up, enfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up and breathe me
I pulled out my phone to send quick texts goodbye to both Kenzie and Mom.
I grabbed a bottle of pills I stole from my Mom. I don't remember what they're called, but I heard they do serious damage if I take a lot. I shoved a bunch of pills in my mouth and swallowed. Everything else that happened was a blur, and then everything went black.
KENZIE'S POV
"Maddie! Give it back!" I yelled chasing her. She stole my phone and I was getting texts.
"Uh, Kenz. Take your phone, this is a serious message." She sounded serious. I took my phone from her and saw messages from Alex.
Alex: Hey, Kenz.
Alex: I just wanted to say that I love you.
Alex: Like.. a lot.
Kenzie: I love u too ❤️
Alex: I mean it.
Alex: I was planning on asking you out.
Alex: But what would be the point if I can't live on this earth any longer.
Alex: I tried so hard.
Alex: I tried for you and my mom.
Alex: You guys won't have to worry about me anymore.
Kenzie: Alex? What do you mean?
Kenzie: You better not do what I think you're doing.
Kenzie: I'm texting Demi.
"Oh, God. I need to text Demi!" I exclaimed as I panicked.
DEMI'S POV
"Why can't I drive?" I fake whined like a kid.
"Have you seen your driving? It's always a miracle we live every time!" Max replied while laughing. My phone went off and I got a text from Alex.
Alex: I love you. I'm sorry.
Alex: But I have to do this.
Demi: Alex? Why are you sorry? Do what?
Alex: Tell everyone I love them. You won't have to worry about me anymore.
Alex: Goodbye.
Demi: Baby? Talk to me.
Demi: Don't do anything stupid! Max and I are on our way!
Demi: Why aren't you answering? Talk to me, baby girl.
Demi: We just got back. Please answer me!
"Max! We need to go back home! Right now!" I panicked and shouted at him while trying to get a hold of Alex. "She isn't answering my calls or texts! Drive faster!"
"This is the speed limit!" He defended himself. I got a text from Kenzie explaining the conversation between her and Alex.
"She might be attempting suicide!" I shouted as I started crying. Max started driving faster. We arrived back at the tour bus and I quickly hopped out of the car. I ran to the tour bus, my heels clicking on the concrete.
"Alex! Baby?!" I shouted as soon as I got in. I ran into the bathroom and the sight I saw was horrible. My baby girl. Unconscious on the cold tile. There was blood on the floor next to her face. She must've thrown up blood. "Alex! Baby?!" I kneeled down next to her unconscious body. "Don't leave me, baby!" I sobbed as I started to check for a pulse. She still had a faint pulse. "Call an ambulance!" I shouted to Max as I held Alex in my arms, rocking us back and forth.
"The ambulance is on their way." Max said trying to stay calm and coming into the bathroom. The ambulance arrived shortly. When they were putting her in the back I found a couple notes and a video opened on her phone. I grabbed the notes and the phone and quickly rushed to the back of the ambulance.
"She's losing oxygen! We need to put her on some oxygen!" A paramedic shouted as we were rushing to the hospital. They put an oxygen mask on her. Luckily they managed to get her pulse to a decent rate.
"My poor, baby girl.." I choked out as I held her hand. "You'll make it.. you're a strong girl.."