Chereads / A skeleton's journey / Chapter 42 - A band of misfits

Chapter 42 - A band of misfits

Shopkeeper: Um sir we appreciate you buying from us but... why are you paying in wolf pelts

Me: Uh... I got pickpocketed on the way here.

Shopkeeper: Okay... where did you find 50 wolf pelts?

Me: I hunted for them.

Shopkeeper: All of it?

Me: All of it.

Shopkeeper: since you only bought a basket of apples, a sack of flour, 1 dozen eggs, sugar, salt and 2 lemons the amount you payed was way more than what is required. I don't think we have enough change to pay you back.

Me: Well do you perhaps have a backpack for all of the purchased items i bought? Some appliances are also welcomed such as pots and bowls.

Shopkeeper: Of course, now if we add that in then... here's your change of 44 copper 35 silver.

Me: Pleasure doing business with you.

Shopkeeper: The pleasure is ours, have a nice day.

Walking away from the market, i scout for a spot to make the zefir. Since cooking in an inn is not possible and doing so in the middle of the street will only draw the attention of guards, i choose to camp out while making the zefir. This is going to be an inconvenience seeing how it takes at least one whole day to make it. I start off by peeling the apples using my rustic steel sword before washing the clean of any dirt. Cutting them up into small pieces, i then add them along a small amount of water into a small pot. When the water is completely gone, i take the apple mush and have to separate the excess gunk by hand as i don't have a sieve. Then into the pot again with sugar and boil until all of the sugar is dissolved and the sauce turns thick. Blasting the jam with cryomancy solidify it, i prepare a bowl of egg white and a pinch of salt. I then insert the jam and pull out the whisk. If someone were to see me right now, they would see me as a madman violently assaulting a bowl as i whip the whisk like a street fighters joystick. It takes 30 fucking minutes for the result to be satisfying. But that wasn't even the worst part as i realize that after i prepare the gelatin and sugar mixture, i have to continue whipping even faster for an even longer period of time. After 2 more hours of abstract pain, the mix is now ready to be molded into shape. Without frosting tools, i have to utilize my arts and crafts skills molding the shape using my bare hands. I make them all look like roses with a total of 42 so they can have 6 each excluding Gozuki because he's an dick. I put them all on a compact metal tray and look around for extra strawberries for a red frosting so the zefire would resemble roses more. Strawberries taste great with apples anyway so it should be okay to add it. After 1 day of waiting, i peel the zefir of the tray dunking them in powdered sugar before carefully coating them in my strawberry frosting. a little more ice magic and they are finally completed. Now i just have to find Cornelia in town and inconspicuously gift them to her.

[In Deng Zhi town]

Hmm where could they be staying? Isn't there that time where Guy got thrown out of a brothel for overstaying in there? Maybe i could wait for that and track them to their place. Then again they're trained assassins and i'm a fucking amateur so chances are that they'll see me tailing them and would avoid/ try to kill me. What to do... "OUT OF MY WAY, OUT OF MY WAAAYYY!" The fuck was that. *crash*. A yellow blur crashes into me from behind at unfathomable speed that would've probaly broken a wall. But since i'm wearing armor and have a mobile kitchen in my backpack, it only felt like getting hit by a bull which i barely stop myself from stumbling over. A groan of pain came from the person that has just flown into me as i turn around to see... Cornelia? What? I don't remember the manga mentioning anything about her running around like that. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU SHRIMP!" And that inhuman screech sounded like a pissed off Najasho. Before i could question this bizarre scenario, Cornelia gets up from the ground activating Crushing King and launches herself into an alley. What's worrying is that she is still tangled with my backpack and the unexpected launch took me flying with her. The unplanned flight ended up with my landing head first into a wall and Cornelia rolling on the ground like a slinky and get comically crushed by my backpack falling on her head. Despite all of that, Cornelia still got up like nothing has happened looking back and forth outside the alley before breathing a sigh of relief. I unstuck myself from the wall and land behind Cornelia who has yet to notice me.

Me: *ahem* you're standing on my backpack.

Cornelia: EEP!

Surprised my the sudden appearance of my voice, instinctively she throws a punch right at my chest... with Crushing King still active. OH FUCK M- *BAM* *CRACK* And back into the wall i go only this time i was buried even deeper. I Think my sternum might have cracked from that. Cornelia takes about 5 seconds to realize what she did before frantically digging me out of the newly formed pile of bricks.

Cornelia: Oh god i killed that man!

Me: I'm still alive over here.

Cornelia: AAAHH! *punches the ground right next to my face creating a sizeable crater*.

Me: ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!

Cornelia: Uuuhhh... no?

Me: Jeez what's making you running around like tornado lady?

Cornelia: I might have angered one of my friends... *distant angry yelling*.

Me: Well are you going to introduce yourself or do i have to call you miss over and over again?

Cornelia: Oh my bad, i'm Cornelia, i'm a traveler visiting Deng Zhi.

Me: I'm Yosif, a travelling cook looking to explore the entirety of the culinary world.

Cornelia: *looks at all the scattered cooking tools* Oh no i'm so sorry about that.

Me: It's fine, i can tell you're sincere and nothing was seriously damaged anyway.

Cornelia: Is it really fine though? I did nearly killed you.

Me: Believe it or not that wasn't the worst thing i had happened to me.

Cornelia: Really?

Me: I used to have a student hunting danger beasts with me. One day, she foolishly decides to take on an Earth Dragon den before notifying me and lead them back to camp when i was cooking. In the end, the pot of soup was ruined and i had to climb up a cliff to get back.

Cornelia: Wow, that sounds exciting... wait didn't you tell me you were a travelling cook?

Me: That's because i am, i retired from my fighting days after i got fired from my previous job for... personal reasons. Now i travel the land cooking up all kind of exotic dishes as my hobby.

Cornelia: I should get back to my friend and apologize, are you sure you don't want any thing from me?

Me: Actually, there's one thing i would to ask of you.

Cornelia: If you're having some perverted thoughts then i'm going to bury you even deeper.

Me: WHAT! NO! Do you think i'm some sort of degenerate pedophile? I have just invented a new dish and i made a lot more than i can possibly eat so maybe you could share them with your friends and give me some feedbacks.

Cornelia: That's it, do i need to pay you?

Me: Nope, think of this as free samples. I do what i do for fun and experience not for money. *hands Cornelia the wrapped bag of zefir*.

Cornelia: Oh thanks, well i have to go now, see you around town. BYE!

Off she goes again as Cornelia dashes back to wherever the inn they're staying in is. I hope none of them are allergic to strawberries or apples or i will be suspected for attempted murder. Right i should get more ingredients for the next dish. I haven't made Stroganoff yet so let's go with that.

[Back at the inn]

The remaining of the Elite Seven are staying inside a room save for Gozuki who is currently occupied with his own business elsewhere. Akame is quietly reading a book in the corner occasionally smacking Guy whenever he tries to sneak a peek at her while Tsukushi, Poney and Green are currently trying to calm a fuming Najasho down.

Green: Najasho, it's just a bowl of soup, what's the big deal?

Najasho: JUST A BOWL OF SOUP? THAT WAS THE ONLY THING THAT I GOT TO EAT FOR THE ENTIRE DAY!

Tsukushi: Calm down Najasho, i'm sure we could get you another one.

Najasho: And what? Spend more of father's money? What would he think of our irresponsibility?

Poney: It was an accident Najasho, Cornelia didn't mean to trip over and throw the soup at your face.

Najasho: Maybe if she wasn't dancing near the table then that wouldn't have happened! I swear if she doesn't come back here i- *knock knock*.

Guy: I'll get it. *opens door* Oh Cornelia, you're finally back.

Najasho: CORNELIA!

Cornelia hides behind Guy as Najasho tries to run at her but was barely held back by Green and Poney. Tsukushi goes over to Cornelia and drags her towards Najasho to apologize.

Cornelia: I-i'm sorry Najasho please don't kill me.

Najasho: SORRY ISN'T GOING TO CUT IT!

Cornelia: How about this bag of treats?

Najasho: HAH, YOU THINK YOU CAN EASILY SWAY ME WITH CHEAP- *sniff* *sniff* That actually smells good, GIMME!

Cornelia fearfully drops the bag of zefir as Najasho springs at it like a starved lion swiftly biting into one. The scent of the zefir has caught Akame's attention as she folds the book to see where it was coming from. The others including Cornelia was also enticed by how great the sweets smelled and tried one themselves.

Poney: Wow *nom* this is some quality stuff.

Green: This is even better than the ice cream father sometimes bought for us.

Guy: Sweet just like a maiden's heart.

Akame: *devours her third one before everyone can even finish their first zefir* more.

Tsukushi: These are amazing Cornelia where did you get them?

Cornelia: Well i when i was running away from Najasho, i bumped into this guy and nearly killed him. His name was Yosif, a travelling cook. The guy was real friendly and asked me to share these treats to give him feedbacks.

Poney: Wait he just gave these to you no charges whatsoever?

Green: *skeptically looks at zefir in hand* This could be poisoned...

Akame: mine *grab Green's zefir and proceed to eat it*.

Guy: Nah, you're worrying too much.

Gozuki: What are you kids doing?

Gozuki has just returned from his assignment and was confused though glad when Najasho is no longer mad at Cornelia. Everybody immediately stands at attention and the treats they were eating caught Gozuki's interest. He picks one up and carefully examines it. Gozuki has been invited to banquets in the palace before and has tasted lots of delicacies yet he hasn't seen anything quite like the peculiar rose like bun he is holding. And what bothers him is that this thing smells better than what those so called "gourmets" inside the palace made.

Gozuki: Where did you find these?

Cornelia: Daddy, i got them for free from a travelling cook after i "bumped" into him.

Gozuki: There's no such thing as free, what did he ask of you for them.

Cornelia: Nothing daddy, he just told me to give some feedbacks about the treats.

Gozuki: Are you certain that he hasn't tracked you or that he worked for the revolution?

Cornelia: I'm positive daddy, i can't sense any lies at all when he told me about his past. Though something doesn't add up.

Gozuki: What doesn't add up?

Cornelia: He said he used to be a fighter and even had a student and that he had stopped fighting since he got fired from his previous job. Now he's a travelling cook yet he wears heavy armor around. I also couldn't see his face because of the helmet. But overall, i didn't feel any killing intent when he was talking to me so i'm sure he isn't here for us or at least not here to harm us.

Gozuki: Interesting... These treats are not poisoned or laced with any harmful substances and has higher quality than luxurious desserts those nobles always eat. There's definitely more to this "cook" than what meets the eyes. Cornelia, i want you to introduce us to him tomorrow. This mysterious individual could either benefits our missions or jeopardize them and i'll be the judge of that.

[Elsewhere]

2 cloaked figures overlook the town from above standing on a cliff, behind them stood a group of armed mercenaries quietly waiting. The Oarburgh assassins have arrived

(the total inventory will not be used until Yosif regains his original body)

Total inventory:

Ascended Wraith set

Primordial's wrath: Damascus

Diadem of supreme arcane might

20 copper 89 silver 38999 gold

Current familiars:

- Sergei the Armor Demon

- Victor the Soul Of Cinder