What you feel inside of your heart doesn't mean that it is the same as what other people are feeling. Maybe you just think that they do because that is what you wanted to believe. Yes, you keep on deceiving yourself to avoid getting hurt. But whatever you do, always remember that life isn't like an anime story where school anime romance exists. Because that is not the case, wake up. This is a real-life story, not some anime school romance story. Wake up!!
"Look at Jeffrey, they are so cute!!" Ann Marie said while giggling. Jeffrey is looking at Jolina in sleep, no, staring at her with affection I guess. Or at least that is how I describe it. And, yes Ann Marie doesn't know that I have a crush on Jeffrey, 'cause up until now, they still think that I had a crush on Andrei.
Jolina is pretty and smart, she was a Korean girl. Well she is a KPOP fan, but she does look like Korean. Odd, I mean we all know that her father is American. Jolina is pretty popular in school. I mean not just because she is beautiful, smart but she is also is very good at dancing. Every time we had a dance competition, she stands out. Jolina is also a friend of Jeffrey's, and the rest of the gang. I mean, since 7th grade they already hang out, how foolish of me thinking that I was the first girl that became part of their squad, thinking I was special. (Hey don't get me wrong, Jolina is not a bad woman, You may not believe it but Jolina became my best friend, till now, our bond is still strong) She is nice. How do I become friends with her, well it started like this?
This year sport fest is coming, and we are preparing for our dance piece. Yep I dance too, we were practicing 'I got a Boy' by Girls Generation, yep kpop, Jolina suggested it, that time that song is very popular. And also, she introduces me to Kpop, ( and here I am 2020, still a kpop fan) and of course, the boy's group, Jeffrey, Andrei, Wong, Markus, Vern, Vincent, and Von were practicing 'Growl' by EXO. I mean those guys were pretty inseparable. What about Alex? He was practicing his song number. He doesn't like to dance but he was pretty good at singing. I told you, those boys were pretty popular, I mean they have the Christmas, the looks and the talent. who wouldn't fall for them? Oh! I forgot t tell you about the new guys, they were also acolyte and pretty close too. it's like we have this major group but we also have minor groups. well you know what I mean. as for the girls; it's me, Jolina, Ann Marie and Joyce.
I know, I'm not good at dancing just like how natural when it comes to Jolina. So I did my very best, practice a lot, and tried to dance as feminine as her. but it wasn't really for me. I dance like a man, and just by doing so, it gave me a hard time to execute it properly.
"Jolina is so good" honestly, I did felt jealous. wishing that I was a little bit as good as her. Don't get me wrong, I never hated her. why would I, I just hated the fact that maybe just once, someone' would appreciate all the efforts I put into the things that I was doing? well maybe, at least once He could notice me.
"Nice! Nice!" I could still remember the way Jeffrey complimented her. I wish I had that guts to talk to him like that. I mean, Jolina and him talk as if they were so close. What am I even doing, all I just did was to wish for something that I don't dare to do. I know that Jeffrey has a crush on her. Well, at least that's what I heard from our friends, ever since 7th grade. And why would I even think that all those things that he did and shown me was because he likes me? I mean, maybe he doesn't like me, ever since we all started to hang out, I can count the times that we only had a conversation in my fingers. And when it comes to other people he talks to them like a normal person. And as far as I remember, I didn't do anything to make him hate me.
And so, the day of the sports fest has come. Everyone is so busy, while we are all preparing for the contest. The girls were putting on makeup. I mean I was putting an eyeliner to them, it made me happy, when people have trust in me.
"Put some in me too!" I ask to them happily, we were enjoying this kind of stuff.
"I'll put some to you mommy! I'll make you look fierce" Yep, they still call me that, I like it. Ann MArie insisted on putting me some. They always said that I have a very kind eyes. The type of eyes that even when mad still looks nice. They often call innocent. Is that something to be happy about?
"I want to try too!" Joyce Ann insisted too, and put some on my eye. I was happy though. I mean they are so cute doing it.
"Wait! the eyeliner is not equal, you put too much on the left eye" Jolina noticed. I hurriedly took the mirror, then we all burst in laughter. It's kinda hilarious. I don't look like myself. Jolina, added an amount on my other eye till they became equal. But it turns out to be too dark.
"Isn't it too dark?" Jolina asks the other girls. I didn't complain. I have trust in them. But then, when the boys came, ruining the fun. They all burst out laughing when they saw me.
"Jewel, what happen to your eyes? You look like a ghost in some horror movie" Markus asks while laughing. Seriously, I really hate his guts. he's a good guy, but when it comes to me, he always makes fun of me. I mean, what is wrong with him.
"Gladly, so I can haunt you till you drop" I looked at Markus fiercely, but he just gave me that "ooh" in a smirking face. seriously, he and I will never get along.
"It doesn't suit you at all, your eyes are better without eyeliner" We all look at Jeffrey. Hontōni! Do you really have to say that? And there was I feeling so embarrassed.
"Yeah" And they all said in unison. And in the end, I come to remove my eyeliner. Although I really wanted to look a little bit fierce even just once. It's not like I don't like to be called innocent, I just think that maybe just once, I wanted to look somewhat strong. At least, just once I wanted him to look at me differently.