The strangest feeling. It felt like I was forgetting something important. Or that something important was missing. But it isn't like me to forget something like that, and I can't think of anything I left at home, or anything that seems out of place. Strange. That is the only word for this feeling. I have felt it all day now that I think of it. Even before I came to school, it is almost if I knew something would be out of place today… but nothing is out of place. All that has been achieved is me being somewhat distracted by this all throughout morning classes.
So as of now morning classes are over. The bell ending fourth period rang a few minutes ago. I'm waiting outside my class for Yasuraoka-san, as has become usual for me. I guess she must have been let out of class rather late today. Shimotsuki-san was back in class today, sitting next to me. She didn't say anything to me, let alone anyone else. I almost feel sorry for her. In fact, I actually feel bored now. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I miss our conversations, but I just have some spare time on my hands for once. I guess I need to find something new to get involved in. Someone new to mess around with, and help on their path forward. Stop their misguided ways, and point them in the right direction. Or at least whatever direction is most beneficial to me.
It's been five minutes now. I'm starting to feel unnerved. Yasuraoka-san should be here by now. No matter how late she was out of class, it can't have been this late. She should be here by now. Maybe this is why I've felt uneasy all morning. No, that's stupid. There's no way I would know something like this would happen. Then why have I felt like so this morning? I start walking. I'll go see if Yasuraoka-san is still in class for whatever reason. I doubt it, but I guess that would be the best place to start looking for her. Perhaps the reason I'm feeling like this has something to do with Yasuraoka-san though. After all, the feeling seems to have become deeper rooted and stronger just over the last few minutes, while waiting for Yasuraoka-san. Then it would make sense if I was worried about something related to Yasuraoka-san. Her outing with Otsubo-san and her friends? Yes, that must be it. That would be the only thing that I would be worried about to do with Yasuraoka-san at the moment. I was quite looking forward to hearing how that went. I mean, knowing Yasuraoka-san, I can imagine both if it went well, or if it went poorly, and both seemed equally likely to me. Which is exactly what I like about Yasuraoka-san so much. She is the only person I cannot predict with any accuracy. She always finds ways to surprise, and I can never figure out why it is that she did what she did. Every time I think I almost have her all worked out, she surprises me once again, and I have to work it all out. So I have kind of given up on trying to work her out for now, and am just forced to prepare myself for absolutely all possibilities when she is involved. I'm sure I will eventually find some inspiration that will give me a clue as to how her brain works, but I have not attained any quite yet.
This is starting to worry me. Yasuraoka-san is not in her class. I look up to check I have the right classroom. 3-B. No problem there. I think back, would there be any way in which we missed each other in the corridor. No, there weren't enough students around for me to not have seen her. The immediate rush after the lunch bell was well and truly over, and the corridors and stairs were all near deserted.
So Yasuraoka-san clearly isn't around. Maybe she is somewhere else in the school? The only place I can think of is the empty science classroom. Or I guess she could be with Otsubo-san and her friends. Or again, I could just forget about this and carry on with my day. I mean, Yasuraoka-san could just be having the day off sick. There's nothing unusual or wrong about that, especially for a student as undedicated as Yasuraoka-san is. It feels extremely tempting to forget about this. After all, it almost certainly is nothing. Yasuraoka-san is most likely in her room at home, enjoying a day off from school. That is correct, there is nothing for me to worry about or concern myself with here… no, I just said before that I wasn't going to try and guess at what Yasuraoka-san is doing or thinking anymore. Because more often than not, I always get it wrong. It is near certain that Yasuraoka-san is not sitting at home in her room. That seems like the least likely possibility, simply because it is the one that seemed most obvious to me at first. Then where is she? Hanging out with Otsubo-san and her friends, or in the empty science classroom seem like equally likely possibilities to me right now. I guess I'll go ask Otsubo-san if she has been at school today. If I remember correctly, they sit along the side of the new block, which extends out from the main block. The easiest way to get there, is to walk around the main block. I start heading for the stairs to head down to the ground floor.
I'm making my way along the eastern side of the main block when I see them, exactly where I expected them to be. Even from this distance, I recognise Otsubo-san, after all I see her all the time in the student council. The others I do not recognise immediately, but upon coming closer I know I have seen some of them around before. I recognise a girl with long hair, and a boy with rusty-brown hair that looks almost orange out in the sun like this. In fact, I think I know his name. Yamagami Tsukasa, I believe. From what I've heard, he used to be rather popular among the third-years before I came to this school. I assume he had some kind of falling out in his first year here then. There is also a boy with curly hair, and who's proportions are rounder and more relaxed than others. It is possible I remember his face, but I can't think of anything I have heard about him before. I can also clearly see that Yasuraoka-san is nowhere to be seen. I suppose now that I'm here, I might as well ask Otsubo-san if she has been to school at all today. I approach them.
Otsubo-san sees me approach before I get there. In fact, it was the long-haired girl who noticed me first, and nudged Otsubo-san. I guess that means she recognises me. Well, I guess that isn't too surprising, as I am the student council president. Otsubo-san gets up, and walks over towards me as it becomes obvious that I'm headed towards them.
"Hey, Tohsaka-san."
I stop walking, as she stands in front of me. She probably thinks I have come to tell her about a meeting she missed or something.
"Hello, Otsubo-san," I offer as my greeting. I would prefer to get this over with quickly. Even though I said I would go through all possibilities when it comes to Yasuraoka-san, it seems unlikely that Otsubo-san has any worthwhile information. Considering that they haven't been friends for a long time, it's unlikely to me that she knows where Yasuraoka-san is, if she isn't at school.
"Umm… did I forget a student council meeting?"
"No, not at all," I told you that is what she would think I am here for, "I was just wondering if Yasuraoka-san was attended class today?"
Otsubo-san's expression becomes slightly more concerned, "no she wasn't in class this morning, I assumed she stayed at home today. Wouldn't you know better than me?"
That question takes me by surprise a little, but I guess it is a reasonable enough one to ask. Besides the point, Otsubo-san clearly does not have any information as to where Yasuraoka-san is.
"Maybe. But, Yasuraoka-san never stays at home no matter what. She comes to school even when she is sick."
"I guess you're right. Now that you mention it, I can't remember a day she hasn't been in class all year. Is she in some sort of trouble?"
This question on the other hand does confuse me significantly. Why would you leap to her being in trouble? Well, I guess it will be quicker to ask her what she means, than try and work it out in my head.
"Why would you think that?"
Otsubo-san smiles at me, "because I've never seen you looked so concerned before. You actually care about her, don't you?"
Something in my chest jumps, and leaves a strange sensation behind with it. That makes me feel weird. It was a reaction to what Otsubo-san just said, which gives me all the more reason to be inclined to agree with her. Do I really look concerned though? I do not even know what my face looks like when I'm concerned. This is all foreign to me. So much so that I just want to ignore it, and forget about it as soon as possible. Which is not like me. Forgetting something is never an option normally. Why do I keep acting oddly like this?
"Is that so? Sorry to interrupt your lunch break."
I turn to leave, headed in the direction of the empty science classroom.
"Why do you refer to her like your near strangers anyway?"
I turn back, "what do you mean?"
"You always call her 'Yasuraoka-san', even though the two of you have been friends for such a long time."
"I refer to everyone the same, it isn't any different."
"It is different though isn't it?"
I knew what she meant, but I wasn't sure how to answer her. Of course it wasn't any different. I mean, if I call everyone the same, then that includes even Yasuraoka-san. But, Otsubo-san is saying it shouldn't include Yasuraoka-san because our relationship is different when compared to my relationship with others. Because I actually care about her, to use Otsubo-san's words. I still can't work out an answer. All this has done is confuse things in my head. Now even I'm not sure what I should be calling Yasuraoka-san. And so, in a very rare occurrence, I do not get the last word in. Unable to find my answer, I walk away from Otsubo-san.
I look in through the door of the science classroom. There wasn't any point coming here. Otsubo-san had already told me that Yasuraoka-san isn't at school today, and I do not possess a key to the room myself. Yasuraoka-san was the only student with a key, so without her it is impossible to get into the classroom. But I came here anyway, because I wanted to get somewhere no one else could see me. I could probably convince Takeda-sensei to lend me a key for lunch break, but there isn't anyone else to be seen in the science block, so here is good enough. I let my face relax. My strange feeling of anxiety grows stronger, almost intoxicatingly so. I can't find room in my mind for anything else, it is driving me crazy. Well, I probably am already somewhat less than sane so perhaps it would be fine to just ignore it, but… I don't think I can ignore it anymore. Yasuraoka-san is indeed someone very important to me, just how important I'm still not quite sure, but I definitely need to know that she is okay. There is no way that she would just stay at home because she has a cold, she always came to school anyway other times. That is just how much she hated that home of hers.
I regather myself, and breathe out heavily. I feel refreshed, awake, and attentive. It is clear to me that I need to find Yasuraoka-san somehow. Wherever she is, I am confident she is not at home. There is no way she would be fine Saturday, and then too sick for her to not go to school on Monday, when you consider she will take any excuse to leave that house. But how should I find her? I guess, I should text her phone first. I've had her phone number for a while, but I have never used it before now. For one, I have not had a reason to, but also because I doubt Yasuraoka-san checks her phone regularly, if at all. Maybe it would not even be worth the time to text her, considering how unlikely it is she will see it. If I do not text her, I could get Isogai-san to try and work out where she is. I imagine he would find it pretty easy to locate her using her phone. As long as she has it on her.
But… that seems kind of wrong. Yes, I do have a sense of what is right and what is wrong, I just normally ignore it. If it is Yasuraoka-san though, I want to at least try to do what is right first. And besides, I am not going to rule out any possibilities. There is a chance Yasuraoka-san will respond if I text. So I will.
SEIJURO:
I pause, unsure what it is I want to write. It would probably be best to ask something reasonable, as I have no way of knowing for certain that she is in some trouble. So I guess I should just query as to the reasons for her absence today. Just like a… friend would do. Or at least I think a friend would do that.
SEIJURO: Are you at home today?
I decide to sit and wait in the corridor of the science block, as I wait for her response. There are a dozen other things, tens of other people, I could talk to right now, but this is far to important. If I had not realised that already, I certainly understand now. This is indeed important now. In the present, this is what I need to focus on, if only for a short time. My future, my goals, my ambition, will have to swallow their pride for just a day or two. Indeed, maybe Otsubo-san is right. Yasuraoka-san must be someone of some great importance to me if I am willing to halt everything else for her. And for me to have little to no doubt or hesitation when deciding on this course of action, surprised even myself. Yes, she clearly is someone of great importance to me, that much should have become obvious to me a long time ago. And not just because she is some experiment that has been extremely difficult, or because she is my… friend. It is something beyond that, I believe. What exactly, I could not say for certain, so I am not going to say anything rash that I will probably regret ever thinking later. So for now, you will just have to settle for I am unsure.
A notification pings on my phone. It is the third time it has happened while I've been waiting. The first time I jumped, and fumbled as I took the phone out of my pocket. I'm glad no one saw it. That would have been the most embarrassing thing I have done for a while. It ended up just being a message from someone unimportant and unrelated. The second time was just as meaningless, so when my phone went for a third time, I was slow and unexcited while taking it out… and yet again it was nothing of interest to the current situation. I need to return to class soon. The bell signalling the end of lunch will ring in three minutes. It would be best for me to begin heading back to class. It is unlikely that anything will happen, in the next few minutes, and even if it does, will there be anything I can do about it, or even anything I need to do about it? I mean, I still do not know for certain that Yasuraoka-san is not just sitting at home, in her bed, with a cold. It is still a possibility. Yes, that still is the most likely possibility, so I begin making my way back to the classroom.
I'm standing up from my desk… well, this is not what I wanted to be doing. Everyone is looking at me strangely, I mean after all, it is not exactly normal for a student to stand up in the middle of class, especially when you consider it is me. I'm the student council, and by all accounts a role model student. I do not do things out of the ordinary like this, at least to the best knowledge of the vast majority of teachers and students. To explain what I am doing to you, if you have not already guessed, I guess I should tell you that I just got a text message from Yasuraoka-san.
I'm at the Hokkaido War Memorial Park: YASURAOKA
Clearly not at home. In fact, I believe that the war memorial is on the other side of her house from school, quite a distance in fact. Instinctively, this message caused me to stand up. So now, everyone is looking at me, some expectantly, some out of curiosity, but most just out of sheer shock.
My homeroom teacher is the first to speak, "Tohsaka, would you please remain seated until the end of class."
He speaks, trying to remain in some control, but his voice quavers a bit. After all, even among teachers, I am considered quite a respected member of society. You could say they even look up to me. I have to use that to my advantage in this moment.
"Sensei, you will have to excuse me from the rest of class. Takeda-sensei had asked me to help him account for science equipment at the beginning of this class, but I had forgotten. I should go now."
My teacher isn't even the slightest bit suspicious. What reason would he have to be suspicious anyway? I'm a very highly regarded student after all. I would never do something as dishonourable and untrustworthy as lie to a teacher so that I can skip class.
"Is that so? You shouldn't keep him waiting any longer then."
"Thank you for your understanding," I smile slightly to myself as I pack up my things to leave the class.
That was rather well recovered. And now I'm free to leave the school and head to the memorial park. After I replied to Yasuraoka-san, telling her to stay where she is, I texted Isogai-san, and got him to set up the arrangements necessary to recreate my alibi. He was to send Takeda-sensei an anonymous text, blackmailing him into accepting my version of events. And he'll do as we say. After all, we have some pretty damning stuff over him, that would probably end his career. How else do you think I convinced him to give Yasuraoka-san a key to the science classroom? If my teacher happened to ask him if I indeed was helping him with checking the school's stock of science equipment, he would say that I was, but I then had to head home due to a family emergency, and missed the rest of the school day because of it. A perfect alibi, to fit the fact that it will certainly take the rest of the day to deal with whatever issues Yasuraoka-san is having. Or it most likely will. And so, with that all considered and covered, I board a bus that will drop me off at the memorial park.
SEIJURO: Stay there.
Hokkaido War Memorial Park, huh? It is a rather large park. After all, it is in memory of one of the largest losses of life in Japanese history. The Hokkaido War is the name Japanese give to the Third Great War, as the war began on the shores of the northern Japanese island of Hokkaido. Makes sense, does it not? But, it is rather narrow minded of the Japanese to remember it as the Hokkaido War. After all, the campaign in Hokkaido lasted for a mere three months, and the war as a whole lasted six years, eight if you count until the Treaty of Caracas. But, as I was saying it is a rather large park. It might be hard to find Yasuraoka-san. If it was anyone else, I would start looking right at the centre, where the memorial itself is, but with Yasuraoka-san… I do not think I would find her there. If I had to guess, which I probably will since I doubt I can rely on her to answer my text messages, I would guess she is somewhere along the river that runs through the western part of the park. You might be wondering why I have such extensive knowledge of this park. I actually come here rather often. It is a reminder to me of the mistakes the Japanese, and humans as a whole, made in the past. Japan could have become a true power if it wished. After the success of the Hokkaido campaign, Japan was poised to create a great empire spanning all of eastern Asia. But instead, we bowed out of the war, only returning for a short time when an Anglo-Russian fleet threatened Tokyo. The rulers of the time chose isolationism rather than conquest. Japan would quite possibly be a global superpower on par with the Anglo-Russian empire and the Westphalia Pact, with a territory stretching to the steppes of central Asia, and south to the East Indies.
That is besides the point however, what is important now is that I find Yasuraoka-san. And I believe that she will most likely be down by the river. I do not want to have to make assumptions, but I have no other choice. I start westward, heading towards where the river meets the park's southern boundary, and making my way up from there.
So… we have been sitting next to each other for a while. I'm not sure exactly how long, but it must have been at least ten minutes. Neither of us have said anything, in fact I would not be surprised if she is actually asleep. She has her eyes closed, and has been looking straight ahead, barely moving at all, this whole time. When she is asleep, Yasuraoka-san looks completely different. There is none of the worried eyes, and nervousness, that her face seems to express near permanently when she is awake. For once, Yasuraoka-san looks peaceful, and without a care in the world. Her face is flat, with no wrinkled lines breaking up the surface. I do not think I have ever thought that she could look this beautiful before. It feels like something I should not be doing, but I reach out to touch her face. I wonder what this would look like to someone passing by. Her cheek is soft and smooth to the touch, and warmth seems to resonate out from it. I can still feel the heat, even with my hand resting an inch away from her face. I wonder how long she has been sitting. She has a bag down by her feet, a large one at that. It looks full.
It might have been my imagination, but I see her eyelids flutter. I instinctively pull my hand away from her. No, it wasn't my imagination. Yasuraoka-san's arms and legs start moving. She stretches each of her limbs, near simultaneously, almost hitting me. Well, she would have hit me if I did not move out of the way. Yasuraoka-san groans as she stretches, in a very unpleasant, almost disgusting way. Yeah, I think I need to take back everything I just said about her being beautiful.
Yasuraoka-san opens her eyes, then after taking a few seconds to adjust to the bright light, jumps. I guess she realised there was someone beside her.
"Oh, Sei-chan? How long have you been there?"
"I just got here," I lie.
"Hmm, is that so? Guess it was just a dream after all."
Wait, she saw that? Might be best for her to keep thinking it was a dream.
"What are you doing here? You look terrible," I say to her, and it could not be truer. Now that she is awake, I can see her eyes are bloodshot, and a dark aura seems to hang around her. I am not sure she would even be able to walk like this.
"Ah, I guess you would say I'm…" she looks down at the bag.
"Are you running away from home?"
It seemed like a reasonable guess. She had talked to me before about running away from home. For her it had always been a last resort option to be used if and when necessary. It does make me wonder what would have had to happen for her to run away, if indeed she is running away, but I do not think she is currently in a state of mind to answer complicated or emotional questions very coherently.
"Yes."
She is running away then. Assuming she is awake enough that she understood my question.
"Where are you going, then?"
It takes her a few seconds to process my question, "I was going to my aunt's, but now I'm not sure…"
Did she change her mind? Or did she go to her aunt's, but was unable to stay for one reason or another? I think that question would probably be a bit much for her right now. I sigh. What am I supposed to do now? I have to help her, but I do not know how much I can, or am willing to do… no. That is wrong. I must do everything I can to help her, that is what I convinced myself of at lunch. If I'm not willing to do everything and anything, then why would I have left class, and used so many resources to create my alibi? Yes, I will do everything I can to help her, no matter what that everything is.